A QUICK AUTHOR'S NOTE:

This is the first multi-chaptered fic i wrote therefore it's not amazing and all i've written so far are 2 chapters but there will be another 8 to come (once i finish those stupid oneshots that i left over the holidays =_= ) hopefully once i do this i can devote myself to my GrimmIchi fic that i posted up here. oh, this is also posted on deviantART too (i kinda decided to use this account for multi-chap fics and dA for shorter stuff) and when i posted it up on here too i didn't really know what to rate it as (it has a lot of depression, angst, self-harming and talk of sex but no actual 18+ material e.g. lemon.) none of things i mentioned in the brackets are considered M-Rated material but together . . . i dunno so i marked it as M. feel free to tell me if you think that is over the top and i'll mark it back down to T.

anyway ignore my pointless explaination and enjoy!

"POWERLESS"

HichiIchi

ONE

He opened his eyes, slowly.

His body was in the same position it had been when he had fallen asleep; his arms and legs spread out evenly over the blue duvet that covered his mattress. What time was it now? He gazed up into the darkness of his bedroom ceiling.

He had felt like this before, a long time ago, but this was utterly different from before......

He knew what true sadness felt like, to feel like you're the only one to blame for what happens, to feel lost, and weak. But now he didn't feel sad or lonely, just empty....and this emptiness felt like it was devouring him, slowly......slowly becoming empty........slowly becoming.........hollow.....

'Stop it!' he screamed mentally, 'Don't think about it. Don't think about him. What happened. Her. Don't think. Just, don't'. He clutched the duvet desprately, screwing his eyes together. Shut. Tight.

"What are you looking at?"

"....Yer eyes..."

"....W-What?"

"Yer eyes"

"...What about them.....?"

"They're.......sorta....nice--"

"DON'T!" he screamed bolting straight up. His knees tight to his aching chest. His hands gripping his orange spikey hair. His fingernails tearing his scalp.

"Don't.....forget everything...........just......"

xXxXxXxXx

Brown eyes snapped open as the rest of his body doubled over in pain.

"Shit!" he shouted, his head buried between his knees and his hands clutching his stomach. That pain soon turned to anger as he looked up, he glared at the pale figure who had woken him from his peaceful slumber.

"Fuck Shiro! That hurt!" he shouted at the albino who was lying in his bed. The pale figure pressed a finger against the other's light, tanned lips, sending the angry teenager a murderous glare. "Wah?" the teenager barely mumbled with the heavy pressure of the albino's finger resting on his lips. The albino jerked his head towards the door. The boy looked. His eyes widened as the albino removed his finger for the boy's lips. "Y-Yuzu!" the red-head cried.

The young girl standing in the doorway looked nervously at her brother, "Ichi-nii...who are you talking to?" she asked, concern lacing every syllable.

"N-No one!" he replied. He began to rub eagerly at his eyes, "Just tired, that's all."

"Are you sure?" she asked again.

"Yeah!" her elder brother replied faking an overly large yawn, "When you're half-asleep you do funny stuff, everyone knows that Yuzu....."

"Really!" she said astonished at her brother's wisdom.

"Yeah."

"Wow.....well....breakfast is ready so come down once you're dressed okay?"

"Already?" he replied, "You're up early Yuzu...."

"No I'm not Ichi-nii."

"You're not?"

"No....it's half past eight"

"Holy hell!!! I'm gonna be late!!" the boy shouted begining to scramble out of bed but soon stopped himself when he realised he was naked and his little sister was still in the room.

"Hurry Ichi-nii and get some breakfast!" she said with a light smile.

"Will do!" he smiled back.

When she walked out of the room closing the door gently behind her, Ichigo jumped out of bed and began to search for some clothes. His hollow on the other hand just sat and watched the flustered boy rush around the room getting ready for school.

After putting on some boxers and a pair of trousers, Ichigo picked up a black T-shirt. Realising that it was inside-out, he began to push his arms into the shirt so that he could tug it back to it's normal state. He paused. He didn't even have to guess. He turned to lock eyes with the albino, who was still in bed, "What do you think you're looking at?". The albino looked at him, still half in a daze, and then began to trail him his eyes up and down the figure before, as if his were double checking.

"You" he said simply, "half naked" he a sickening smirk spreading across his features.

Ichigo grunted with disgust, "You seriously don't get it, do you Shiro?".

The albino recognised the nickname, whenever he pissed Ichigo off he would always call him 'Shiro'. The hollow had no idea why of course.

He raised an eyebrow, "Ya still mad at me fer wakin' ya up?"

The boy glared at the albino, "Don't rediculous! I'm mad at you about this!"

"Makin' ya late?" he replied, confused.

"YES!" the red-head shouted back.

"Ya know I can't tell the time like you can...." he mumbled, shame in his eyes at the fact.

"Wouldn't matter if you could!" he retorted, "I told you not to! I told you I had school the next day! But what do you do!? Fuck me! That's what!"

"I did it 'cause ya workin' way to hard, everyone needs a lil' release now and then!" he replied angerly.

"But I told you not to, don't you get that!" he asked the albino.

"If ya really didn't wanna then why didn't ya tell me to fuck off!?" the pale figure accused the teenager.

"I'm not cold-hearted! I would never reject you like that!"

"Come on Ichi!" the albino stood up, "We're all friends aren't we? Tell me the real reason!"

"That is the real reason! I don't lie! For fuck's sake Shiro I--" he paused suddenly.

The albino looked at him, "You what? What's wrong Ichi?" he asked, venom lining his voice, "Cat got yer tongue?". Ichigo stood there, frozen. "Can't say it can ya King?"

"It's not like that and you know it!" the red-head growled, but his gaze began to slip from making eye-contact with the albino.

"You're pathetic." he looked at the teenager, hurt in his eyes, "It doesn't bother me really whether ya do or not, but, if ya want me to start hatin' ya, this is how ya should go about it...."

The red-head stayed silent. He then found the courage to look the hollow in the eye, but by then he had already returned to his inner-world.....

xXxXxXxXx

The boy looked up, lessening the harsh grip on his head slightly, crimson plastered around his eyes, tears streaking down his face.

How do you live with so much pain infecting your mind? How can you live when the one person who can take away that pain is gone? How do you when all you do is think of that one person but every memory hurts more than the pain inside of you? How?

The red-head wiped away the bitter-sweet water from his cheeks. He slowly turned his body around and lowered his bare feet onto the carpeted floor. As he stood he never felt such a heavy strain on his legs before; it was although his torso and legs were cased in concrete. He then forced his feet into action as he began to make his way towards his bedroom door.....