Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of "The Avengers"-they belong to Stan Lee and the MCU. I also don't own the characters of "Mission: Impossible"-they belong to Paramount.

Author's Note: This one shot would probably happen sometime after "Mission: Avengers 2" and sometime before "Captain America: The Winter Soldier." This falls into the "Brother's In Arms" universe, so if you haven't read "Brothers in Arms" or "Mission: Avengers I and II, you may be a bit lost. And yes, this is what I've come up with after not being active for a ridiculously long time. Enjoy!

"Hey….Cap?"

"Yeah?"

"We ah….we need to talk."

"Seriously? Right now?" Steve Rogers craned his neck around the corner, looking for their target. Not seeing any opposition, he waved his partner to follow him.

"Now's a good a time as any. We're both alone…not really much chance of an interruption…"

"Okay….good point. What do you want to talk about?"

Agent William Brandt was a little flushed, and it had nothing to do with the tension of the mission or the fact that it was pushing 90 degrees indoors. "Well…I kinda want to know what's up between you and Agent Carter."

"What's up'?" Steve asked. "You're gonna have to be a little more specific than that, Will. Obviously this is some 21st-Century thing I don't get."

"Oh come on, Cap," Brandt said. Tony'd be laughing his ass off right now. He would've smiled, if the situation hadn't been so damned serious. "They had cheaters and affairs in the 40s….hell, they probably had more high-profile ones then than we do now. 'Cept you guys probably called 'em something much prettier."

To his surprise, Steve snorted. "Yeah, couple good ones, as a matter of fact. But I'm confused. Who's cheating on who?"

"You!" Brandt exploded. "I saw you and Jane the other night!" He probably would've punched him if he'd been able. He didn't know what happened when you punched a super soldier, but he was fully expecting it to hurt. Too bad they needed their fearless leader for this.

"You saw what, exactly?" Steve sounded truly confused.

"You know, you two! Together," Brandt stressed all three syllables.

Steve thought for a moment. "Yeah, I'm definitely missing something. Can we talk about this later? Like, say, after our impending deaths?" He studied the walls around them. There had to be an entrance he was missing.

Suddenly, the wall got closer, and Steve realized Brandt had hit him in the back with his shoulder, sending them both flying. "Hey!" Steve protested. "Agent Brandt, we need to focus."

"Oh I'm plenty focused," Brandt growled back. "I was pretty focused in on you and my girlfriend out on the balcony the other night."

To Brandt's annoyance, the Avenger started laughing. "Cap, so help me, if we get out of this, even if it hurts me more than it'll hurt you, I swear to God I'll kill you."

"I'm sorry," Steve apologized, shutting up instantly. "It's just….I can't believe…."

Outside the walls, they heard yelling. And smashing. And gunfire. "Backup's here," Brandt informed him. "And I do not want to have this conversation in front of Tony or Benji, so…how about you tell me what the hell is so damned funny."

"Well first of all, I'm not having an affair with Agent Carter," Steve said. "In fact, I'm actually seeing someone else-who actually is named Agent Carter, but it's Sharon, not Jane and-you know what? I'm not having an affair with Jane. She's your gal. I wouldn't do that to a friend."

"Oh really?" Brandt countered. The fight grew louder, and ten seconds later, two guys in black came flying around the corner, saving Steve and Brandt the trouble of having to find them. Brandt grasped the arm of one of the fleeing guys, pulling him into a chokehold. "Then what-exactly-was happening the other night?"

Steve braced himself against Brandt's back, and then lashed a leg out at the second man, driving him into the cement wall. The guy dropped like a rock. "Well, it's a little embarrassing," Steve admitted.

"Ooookay," Brandt drawled. "So you're not having an affair but it's still embarrassing?"

"Yeah, kinda," Steve affirmed. "I didn't wanna tell you because….well, 'cause I just didn't."

Before Brandt could blow up at him again, Brandt heard a yell in Russian. "Steve, close your eyes," he commanded him.

"What?"

"Just do it!" Brandt closed his eyes and ducked. Steve heard a loud bang and saw a flash behind his eyelids. Flash-bang grenade.

A moment later, he heard, "Hey boys, how's it hangin'?"

"You're a laugh riot, Clint," Brandt groaned as his big brother Clint Barton came into the room, closely followed by his redhaired partner. Natasha stepped not-so-ladylike over one of the bodies Brandt had knocked unconscious. "Whoops, guess we didn't need the grenade," she noted. "You guys were good."

"What'd I tell you about getting' Captain Cleaver into trouble?" Clint asked his little brother.

Brandt's jaw dropped. "Excuse me?" he said. "I seem to recall this bein' a joint mission."

"He's kidding, Will," Natasha Romanoff replied. "Because Cap's not all that innocent," she added with a wink at him.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Brandt asked, noticing that Steve, under the Captain America cowl, was turning a slight shade of pink.

"Well, it seems Jane taught him a little bit of the 21st Century the other night," Clint replied, leading the charge out of the room, hauling one of their suspects over his shoulder.

"Yeah, I noticed," his brother hissed.

Clint looked at him. "What was that for?" he asked.

"I saw him and Jane the other night," Brandt replied. "Must've been a hell of a lesson." Instead of Clint looking confused, or embarrassed, his brother burst out laughing.

He could hear Natasha's grin in her voice. "I think she scared him though," Natasha confided in him.

"Guys," Steve said, but Clint and Tasha were in the zone.

"Does everybody know what went down the other night except for me?" Brandt demanded.

"As usual," his brother retorted, and Brandt slugged him in the arm.

"And so is someone gonna tell me?"

Clint and Tasha exchanged looks. "We probably shouldn't," Clint said. "I mean, it was kinda private."

"But if we don't, these two might kill each other," Tasha countered.

"Good point," Clint said. He looked at Cap. "Sorry, pal. He's my brother."

Cap sighed, and moved forward to take the lead out of the warehouse. "Seems Cap's never heard the term 'French Kiss' before," Clint told his brother. "So he was asking Jane what it meant."

Brandt held up a hand. "So-"

"What you saw the other night, little brother, was Jane um, explaining to Cap what exactly that entails," Clint clarified. "He didn't want anybody to know, but Tasha and I were outside, and we couldn't resist teasing him, and he made us not tell, which of course swore Jane to secrecy…."

"So-"

"So you can relax, Will," Clint said, clapping his brother on the back. "Jane didn't want to show him, but we were teasing them so much that she finally just said to hell with it, and that musta been when you saw them."

"And like we said," Natasha added, "I'm pretty sure it scared the hell out of him and I'm pretty sure it's awkward as hell around Jane for him now." She pointed a finger at him. "So do not give him any grief."

"Uh, no," Brandt said, still processing. "Wouldn't dream of it."

"However, an apology might be in order," Clint suggested.

Brandt sighed and ran a hand over his face. "Yeah, I suppose," he replied. He brushed past his brother and caught up to Steve. "Hey, man, I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean-"

"It's fine," Steve said, cutting him off. "I guess I probably would've thought the same thing."

"So we're good then?" Brandt asked.

Steve smiled and nodded. "Yeah, we're good," he said. "As long as we never bring this up again."

"And next time you want makeout lessons, talk to Tasha," Brandt told him.

"I heard that!" Clint yelled from behind him.

"I'm not opposed to that," Natasha spoke up.