Okay. Um, I'm still in the hospital and like the other one, this was typed up in a small ipod. I want to update You Saw Me, but there is no way in hell that I will type up that long ass chapter on an ipod.

Anyways, this is yet another oneshot. Actually, my sister came today with a charged ipod and some things she thought would keep me company, and among those things was an old notebook I had. When I looked inside the notebook, there was a story in it that I wrote when I was about eight years old, and I completely forgot about it. So, I decided that it might not be bad to sort of rewrite the story with better grammer and post it up. Some parts are word for word, but for the most part, since it was originally written for a straight couple, I had to add a lot more. It was really interesting writing this since I got to see how my writing had changed in the past six years, but then I saw that it didn't really change a lot.

Moving on, um, please read and comment because the eight year old in me is dying to know how you like this story.

Just another heartbreak

What is this? It's just another heartbreak. There's tons of them out there, but now you're reading mine. Why? Why are you reading my about my heartbreak? I think it's stupid to even read about heartbreaks. I would have preferred to live in the world made of rainbows and fairytales. But maybe, just maybe reading my story will help inspire you. Inspire you to never hold your heart in high hopes.

As sad as that sounds, it's exactly what I aim to do. And if you do not like heartbreak, or stories that end in tears then don't listen to mine, because it would do nothing but bring down your spirit.

I had known her since I was eight years old, and we hated each other. I was more of a tomboy and I did my best to wreak havoc on those that I disliked. And so, I wreaked havoc on her. To picture me, I was your average eight year old tomboy with large shorts just running past the knee, a loose shirt, hair tied back loosely with a backwards baseball cap. Her, she was the picture of girly perfection then. When we were eight, she was your average girl who wore cute and frilly dresses to school and smiled nicely for all the adults to see. We were complete opposites, and we hated each other.

I didn't know at the time the real reason for the annoyed hatred that I felt for her. There was just something about her that made me want to dip her ponytail her ink, or want to throw mud at her new shoes. She angered me and got to me, and I didn't have the slightest clue why. I didn't understand why this girl, who hadn't really done anything to me, got under my skin so much just for playing around with other people. But at the time, I didn't care, the point is that she did, and I would maker her pay for it.

Though the thing was, I started to see that there was something else other then annoyance. Well, that's not entirely true. Most of it was annoyance, but it was the reason for the annoyance. I was annoyed when she smiled at anyone, boys and girls, hell I was annoyed when she smiled at the teacher. So in my annoyance, I decided that I'd make sure that she didn't smile at anyone by making her life miserable. It didn't really work but another thing came dawning on me. It wasn't long after that I realized that I was gay. How? Well, my mom told me something about boys liking to tease girls that they liked, and that's when I realized that the things I did to her were not to make her cry and hate me, but were to catch her attention in any way possible, even if it meant hating me.

After I realized that I liked her, I stopped bullying her and even did my best to apologize. She made it very hard though. At first she wouldn't accept my apology, stating that she hated me and that I was the meanest person in the world. I was mad that she was being so stuck up about the whole situation, but considering how I had teased her about everything, it didn't take me long to understand that I had to have patience. So I kept apologizing and bothering her to be friends with me.

I guess she couldn't stay away from my charms because she eventually gave in to being my friend. We didn't start of as distant friends. We had already known each other for the longest time, and it seemed pointless to be distant, so we were close from the get-go. I, being the tomboy at the time, would do my best to get into trouble with her by doing dumb and dangerous stunts. Now, she would say that they were stupid and would argue for hours about how we shouldn't do it, but in the end she never backed out of one.

Time went on quickly, and we learned more about each other, even going as far as taking on parts of the other's personality. She had changed, and so had I from when we first met. Yeah, I was still sort of the kid in the long short and backwards cap who you could imagine had a runny nose that I would wipe on the back of my hand, but I did have more manners since I was with her.

And her? Well, I had a huge impact on her it seems. She was no longer the prim and proper little girl in third grade, but instead someone like me but with even better manners and a delicate stature. Instead of wearing frilly dresses, she upgraded to torn jeans. She made a little confession to me one day about how her mom was the one who liked to make her wear the old dresses. To my surprise, she had a lot of strength in her and there were times when we would just battle it out and wrestle, and she won most of those times. It didn't really do much for my self esteem knowing that I lost to a girl who had worn frilly dresses only years ago.

Years went by, and we only got closer and closer. We went through our awkward adolescent phase together, often sharing our secrets with the other. We went through the things that most girls went through in our age, we experimented with makeup, sometimes for fun and sometimes not, we tried on new clothes, trying to find a unique style that identified us, and overall attempted to make the most of what we had left in our childhood.

I won't lie to you, there were many moments that made my heart skip a beat and almost want to jump out of my chest. Those were the moments when we held hands for just a bit longer then necessary, or when naked skin would casually brush against naked skin. It was when huge grins would break out on our face just from seeing each other. The times when we both found ourselves enamored in a world consisting of only us.

In short, we became best friends, closer then any other around us.

When we were in high school, we were the famous duo. We both played sports, her football and me hockey. Now, if you saw us, you wouldn't think that we would be capable of handling such extreme sports, but you'd be surprised, we were awesome at it. Like I was saying, we were popular through high school. We lived in Mississauga, Ontario up here in Canada, so things were more peaceful then what I might imagine schools might be in other parts of different countries. Bullying didn't really exist, but if it did it was really small and discreet. Popularity mainly consisted of people who stood out, no matter their looks or their background.

Because of that, we were in the zone in high school. We were the type of best friends that would casually flirt jokingly in public but still keep an air of maturity. I think that was what made us so popular. We complimented each other very well. We were a lot alike in some aspects, yet completely opposite in others. People around were very casual, and we were well liked among the general population. Of course there was the occasional faction who disliked us solely because we were popular, but we didn't pay much attention to them mainly because we didn't really care about the popularity. To us, high school was all about having fun while you still could, but still retaining the boredom of classes, and pressure of grades.

For the most part though, it was the perfect high school experience, going to clubs, playing on teams, Friday nights off, everything. Though, there was a thing or two that were off. I still wasn't out yet, partially because I was scared that I'd lose my family. I didn't know how they would react, and I was too scared to find out. I hadn't even told her but that's because I was too scared to take the risk that she might hate me for it, or that she might like me back.

I was sure she did, though. I was pretty confident that it wasn't only me. I could feel it, the air between us. I could feel the slight tension during some awkward moments, and the longing we had for each other. I was completely sure that those sideway glances we sent to each other during class weren't just your innocent funny faces, but something more. We didn't talk about that stuff a lot though. I'm sure it was something that we both wanted to confront but were just too scared.

I didn't understand why, really.

I mean, why would you be scared to love, right?

No matter. So, during the end of high school, in our senior year, I guess you could say that she changed a bit. Her family was a bit estranged because of some conflicts but they always tried to stick together. She was feelings all sorts of pressure from different areas in her life and I tried my best to be there for her. For a small while, she didn't do anything and just locked herself at home and pushed me away. No matter what I did she wouldn't talk to me or even acknowledge my existence in any way. Needless to say, I was pissed.

I hated that she had just so casually written me off her life. We had known each other for the better part of our lives and I was angry that she would do that to me. In my anger, the only thing I could do was reciprocate her feelings. I stopped calling her and "bothering" her, as she put it. If we saw each other in school, we would pass each other without a single glance or word. Everyone around us was freaked out by the strange occurrence. I mean, it's true when they say that some people need a sort of break from their friends, but we didn't seem to need that, and that's what made it seem so special.

People tried to get us talking to each other, but it was hopeless, I was stubborn and so was she. I wouldn't apologize for anything, after all, I had done nothing wrong but want to be there for her, and instead she pushed me away. Nonetheless, people were getting tired of our avoidance antics, especially when it was so clear that we wanted to be near each other. I found that ironic. But really, why is it so hard?

I never really did get an answer to that question, but I think I know a little bit more about the topic now.

Then, strangely enough, all of a sudden, she came pounding on my door. When I answered it, she was close to collapsing in exhaustion, sweat dripping down her face and completely out of breath. She told me that she ran all the way to my house from hers, which was about a ten minute drive.

Then, all I could hear was a mess of words, some of which were I'm sorry's and forgive me's. After babbling incoherently for about five continuous minutes, I finally got her to calm down and speak a language that I could understand. She said that she was sorry for the way that she had been acting and that she was going to fix everything immediately. I didn't know then what she meant by then, but it wouldn't be long before I found out.

She didn't bother to explain herself before she ran out of my house, only stopping to scream back, telling me to go inside in the main hall when school ended the day after. I just stared at the where she once was, jaws dropped before chuckling to myself slightly. I didn't know what had just happened, but I didn't care because at least now she was taking to me. It was like all the anger that had built up in me completely disappeared once I heard her voice say my name.

So, I did what she said and the next day I went to the main hall after school. I didn't know what I was supposed to be waiting for or looking at, but it seemed that I wasn't the only one. There was a large crowd of people who were also looking around for something that it seems they couldn't see. When I took a closer look, all of the people in the crowd, or most of them, were close friends of her and I.

There we were, looking around for something we couldn't really see and didn't really know what, until someone in the crowd gasped and yelled to look up. We all looked up, and man jaws were dropped. I think that the majority of us either had eyes popping out of their sockets, jaws that seemed as though they'd reach the floor, or hearts that were pumping at a speed not considered healthy. Or maybe it was just me, I didn't really look around because I was my own eyes were glued to the sight in front of me.

Let me tell you something, our school then was three stories high from ground floor, and then you had the roof. In the main hall, we had this sky light, and the roof was made out of glass similar to the one in the CN tower, in other words, thick, strong glass. And there she was, standing on that thick, strong glass; more then thirty feet up in the air. I could tell she was scared because she's never really been the biggest fan of heights. Okay, she's a huge acrophobic, and that was part of the reason that I was so amazed. The girl wouldn't even get on a ladder and yet there she was thirty feet above me.

She was on her knees and palms, looking incredibly dizzy. At this point, an even larger crowd had gathered around us, some of which teachers who were now contacting the office for someone to get her the hell outta there. Anyways, she was on her knees and palms, and she had an obscenely large sign strapped to her back. The thing was huge, probably even bigger then herself, and she hoisted it up and laid it flat on the glass for all to see. Well, if people's jaws weren't on the floor yet, they sure were at this point.

I'M GAY.

Those were the words spelled across the large sign in huge block letters. Some of the crowd was laughing, others were gasping and whispering about, and there were those that cheered for her. But it didn't matter, cause I blocked all of them out, all the noise, all the troubles, all the things that should've mattered, but didn't. Because at that second, my entire being was focused on her, all my senses were aching for her, aching for her touch, her scent, her essence, her.

Even from thirty feet away, I could directly see into her gorgeous eyes that were looking back on my own. It was as if we were in our own world again, and everything, no matter how confusing they actually were, just seemed to make sense. My mouth was parted slightly, and she was just looking back at me, smiling like I was the most interesting thing in the world.

I felt my eyes water, and even though it might've only been a second, the time that our eyes were locked felt forever. But it was then that I realized that forever was too short. I realized, that no matter the measurement of time, I wanted to always be looking back into those gorgeous eyes that seemed to captivate me and drown me in something far more enticing then the greatest fashions of ecstasy. It was then that I realized that what I felt for her was not a small childhood crush.

I was in love with her.

And I still am.

Then everything seemed to just fall into places. Everything started making sense. It was like solving the answer to life's greatest mystery. The answer was her. Because with her, there were no mysteries, nothing to solve, there was no life and death, no time that could ever hope to satisfy me. There was just the phenomenon of being with her, and being without her. It seemed as though I had two worlds; the world with me and her, and the world with everything else.

And that single second that seemed like forever, ended and we were brought back, but now I had another realization. It was a realization that I would use to change the rest of my life. The noise and worldly sensations came back, and soon the janitors had surrounded her and forced her to get down. It was a memorable day for all of us. She came out to everyone that day, and I had the biggest dawning of my entire life.

The teachers brought her down and I was standing face to face with her, but I couldn't move. I couldn't think. I couldn't do anything. I still had the same face on from when she was up there, with my mouth slightly parted, eyes blinking every so often to make sure that it wasn't a dream, and a slightly shaky figure. She had her head down, her foot drawing circles on the floor, twiddling thumbs, with her gaze set firmly on the floor. Every so often she would look up to see my reaction, and she had this gauging look to her, while being shy at the same time. It was quite an endearing sight. Unfortunately, I was still frozen.

People were coming up to her, asking if it was true and some even asked her to go out with them. But she didn't pay attention to them; we were in our own world again. She was still gauging my reaction, seeing if I would turn her away and say disgusting or congratulations, seeing if I would attack her or hold her.

I chose the latter.

When it finally seemed as though I could move my limbs and breathe again, I ran up to her and engulfed her entire form in my arms, burying my face into her neck and smiling against her skin. She wrapped her own arms around me, mirroring my own actions of burying her face in my neck.

I felt…I don't know I felt. There were so many emotions and a reason for each one. I felt sad that our old life was now ending. I felt mad that she came out before me. I felt shocked that she came out at all. I felt happy that she could be who she actually was. I felt so much more, and it seemed as though they were rolled into a ball inside of me.

She asked me if I could be there for her when she came out to her family, and I was. I held her hand when she came out to her family, and when they shunned her for the most part. She cried and cried but I never left her side. I let her soak the fabric on my shoulders until it seemed as though she didn't have any more tears left.

It took a while, but she finally got over it. Her family became cold and put a large distance between them. Her mom just couldn't deal with it and it hurt her. She tried bridging the gap, but nothing worked. It wasn't long before she gave up trying to gain their acceptance rather then their tolerance.

Soon we had graduated from high school and started our lives. We both wanted to do something involving show business and so we went to Vancouver for school. It was the best place to really start the career in the business. We went to school there, and we lived together as roommates.

I still hadn't told her that I was gay. I know that she knew, but I wanted to tell her with my own voice and my own mouth. I wanted her to see that I wasn't scared of telling her, just scared of confronting the fact that I was in love with her.

One day, I decided that I wouldn't keep it in anymore and that I would tell her and my family. But I was trying to think of a way to do so that seemed larger then life, but simple all the while. I wracked my brain for over two whole months before I finally gave up and decided on something that was less then satisfactory.

On one of our days off, I drove her down to the coast where the ocean was. And there was this section there in the bay where you could only go when the tide was out because it would flood when the tide came in. And I took her there on that tiny closed off area where there was this small rocky hill, and from that hill, no matter how far you looked, there was nothing but water, water for hundreds of miles in each direction. I remember that it was completely clear when we went there early morning, but by the time we settled in the hill, it had started raining.

We were laughing our asses off while freezing in the rain. It was pouring down hard, and we were still up on that small hill. We went to the very peak, and we were giggling about how stupid it was but we both knew we wouldn't be anywhere else in the world. So, I finally did what I came there to do. I told her to stand beside me, and we were facing the ocean that was making such a large noise due to the large drops of water dropping quickly each second. It really was a beautiful sight, a beautiful feeling.

I looked back to her one last time before I filled my lungs with as much air as possible and let out the words I'd been meaning to the last few years.

"I'm gay!"

As the words left me, I thought at the time about the huge weight that was lifting off my shoulders with it. The water that was pounding down hard on me felt completely weightless to the burden that was slowly lifting. It was such a new sensation that I felt filling me. I felt free. Like, I could finally be the person I was meant to be, like I could finally be me.

The words had resonated in the large empty space, and I wondered if there was even anyone that heard it. I remember my heart pounding in my chest and how nervous I was to turn around to see her reaction. I remember shaking but not because of the cold rain. I remember my ragged breath and whispering prayers. I remember the fear and nervousness running through me. I remember her hand on my shoulder, gently making me look to her.

And, it was like an even larger weight was off me when I saw the smile on her face. I felt like I could've collapsed there in relief. She had laughed a bit at my relief, and it wasn't long before we were both laughing. But after the laughing broke out, I knew that there was something else that I wanted to tell her. There was something else that she needed to know.

She stopped laughing when she saw the seriousness in my face and she replaced her own face with a concerned one. I had given her a small smile, and I took her hand in mine, and placed my other hand on her cold cheek. And, I looked straight into the gorgeous eyes that made me fall in love with her and I told her the truth, my truth, my life's greatest mystery.

"I love you." It was really soft and quiet. I had leaned in and just breathed it into her mouth before I pulled away, and I watched and stared at her. I watched as her brain took in the heavy content of my words. I watched her face contort in realization. I watched as her lips parted and her breath die in her own throat. I watched her eyes which showed an emotion that I couldn't discern. I watched her as the millions of thoughts ran through her mind, scrambling for her to make a move.

I didn't know what she was thinking and it scared me. But I knew that if I wanted an answer I would have to wait and even if she said no, I would do anything in my power to make her say yes.

I had placed my hand back on her cheek, and I gave her a small smile that showed no expectations. "You don't have to answer right now. Take your time." Then it seemed as if she could breathe again and she let out a large sigh of relief before she blankly nodded her head. Her cute and innocent expression remains with me even today. I couldn't do anything but laugh at her reaction, which resulted in a pout.

She told me that I was cruel for dropping a huge bomb on her. I told her it was a bomb that had been hanging over her head for a long time. That only caused her to space out more, and caused me to laugh more. We went home the next day, making sure to leave before the tide came in.

That day is another one that holds such a special place in my heart as well as that place. That hill where I flew for the first time. That hill where I spoke for the first time. The hill where I felt I had fully become myself, such a magical place where it seems as though to make the blind see, as it did to me.

After we went home, I told her not to worry too much about my confession and that I'd wait for her to come around. I told her that no matter what, she would likely end up with me because I was planning to sweep her right off her feet. She laughed as a response, but I think that in some ways she knew that I was serious.

Things between us changed slightly. The flirty glares were replaced with thoughtful glances, the joking faces with sincere smiles, and the casual brushes of skin to heart-racing touches.

It was war. Me against her.

I was wracking my brain for the most romantic scenarios I could think of. Unfortunately, neither of us had the sufficient money nor time to go anywhere nice. So, I thought of the most simple and yet romantic gestures I could think of.

I had convinced her to go out on a few dates with me, even if she didn't love me. I knew that she loved me, and the worst case scenario was that she didn't love me in the way that I loved her. But at the time it didn't matter, I was only thinking about how I could change that.

On our first date, I took her to the roof of our apartment building. The landowner was a friend of a friend of mine from the school I was going to, and his friend owed me a favour so I asked him for the keys to the roof.

I took her up on the roof one night, and dinner was there all set up. It took me a few hours to set the whole thing up, and I remember the trouble I had bringing the tables and food all up by myself without her noticing. We had virtually no light because I was stupid and I let the candles out the day before when it rained. There was no plugs and so we couldn't bring up a lamp. But we had the bright night sky to illuminate the evening, and we had the moon to be the centerpiece of the light. It was dark, but the pale light only increased her beauty more. I loved the way that her eyes just seemed to glow in light, and that my eyes never ceased to stop finding hers.

Our food was…not that good. I wasn't exactly the best cook in the world, and I contemplated on ordering take out, but I read somewhere that homemade food is much more romantic. I tried, and gave up, so I ended up making grilled cheese sandwiches, which were her favourite. Unfortunately for me, I hate cheese, but I put up with it for her. After our luxurious dinner of cheese sandwiches, I planned for us to dance.

We were supposed to have live music, but that cancelled on us. Then we planned to use an ipod speaker, but that kinda blew up in my face, literally. So in the end, we ended up using the radio on an old mp3. The mp3 didn't have speakers, so we had to use earphones, one bud for each of us. And we danced, danced to whatever random song was playing. We moved to the beats of some trance songs, we tried to dance to the rock songs, but jumping up and down wasn't exactly convenient when sharing earphones.

After our attempted dances, all we were was a ball of laughing bodies on the floor, trying out best not to spill our guts everywhere. She told me it was the most romantic failed date she'd ever been, and I was glad, I think?

I laid down a blanket for us to end the night looking up at the sky. We did. We were right beside each other, my hand lingering beside hers and she had her eyes closed. I took that time to just look at her and take her in. I love her. That was the only thought running through my entire head. I love her.

The sky was mostly starless, but for some reason, it didn't effect it's vast beauty. It became a reoccurring thing for us, to look at things vast and wide, things that made our problems seem incredibly small and miniscule in the world.

I remember kissing her forehead and watching as she dozed off to sleep. I cleaned everything up before I carried her back into her room and whispered for her to get ready for next time we go on a date in her ear. I still remember the smile the graced her gorgeous face the night she slept. I had wished her happy dreams, and I hoped that I was among them, because I knew she would be in mine.

For another date, I thought that I would do something more simple so that there were less chances of something going wrong. I did a simple movie night. But it seemed that fate had something against me. All the movies that I ended up renting weren't compatible with our video player. I was on the verge of giving up when she recommended that we just watch a movie playing on TV.

Rent was playing on one of the channels and we decided on that. We were sitting side by side in the beginning of the movie, but we surprisingly got enamored in the movie as we sang along ridiculously to the songs. By the time it was almost over, we were laying down on the coach with her tangled in my arms.

I actually thought she had fallen asleep because the movie ended and neither of us had moved. I was scared to see if she was awake in fear of waking her up, but also because I didn't want to ruin the position that we were in. Instead, I held her tighter in my arms, pulling her closer to my body. I let my lips press against her neck softly as I whispered the sweet words in her ears.

"I love you."

I saw the hair on her neck stand slightly, and she turned around to meet my eyes. I was surprised, I didn't think that she was awake. I was even more surprised when I saw her face. At first she was the cutest shade of pink, but then she had this expression on her that showed me exactly how much thought she was putting into this. We were just looking into each other's eyes, too encompassed by the other to move.

I don't think I could tell you how long we stayed like that, just calmly looking into each other's eyes, soul. It must've been hours, but it felt like seconds. I could've gone forever looking into those eyes, but even then, forever is too short.

Too bad all good things must come to an end. I saw her eyelids starting to droop, and I asked her if she wanted to go back to her room now. To my surprise, she said no. Instead, she curled up closer and buried her face in my neck and told me that she wanted to sleep here. I wasn't complaining. I pulled up a blanket over us and held her tightly against my body. It was one the days when I felt complete.

On another date, I decided to take her to do something that we both enjoyed. What? Karaoke! We both loved to sing, but I won't lie, one of us was exceptionally better then the other. I won't say who though.

There was a karaoke bar a little bit farther from where we lived and we drove down there. We ordered a room for a couple of hours, and sang our hearts out. We mostly sang together in one microphone, often fighting for the right to sing in the precious prize. We did some duets, including a whole new world. I sang Aladdin's part, and she sang Jasmine's. It just seemed appropriate to do so since I was the one taking her out on dates.

Then, after we sung virtually all the songs that we knew, we hit the random song button. We didn't know what the song was when it was playing, so we weren't exactly good at singing it at first, but as the song went on, I knew that we were both quickly falling in love with the song.

"So let go (let go)"

We were both singing along with the song, strangely knowing the lyrics as we fell into our own world once again, looking deeply in the other's eyes.

"Jump in

Oh well, whatcha waiting for

It's alright

Cause there's beauty in the breakdown"

At this point, we both had huge grins on our faces as we pulled each other in and danced around, all the while singing and never separating from the other's face.

"So let go (let go)

Just get in

Oh it's so amazing here

It's alright

Cause there's beauty in the breakdown"

When the song ended, we were so close to each other that if we had just leaned forward a couple of centimeters then we would have closed the gap between us. I held her cheek in my hand, and with my eyes I asked her for permission. All she did was smile at me and close the gap for me.

That song became our song, and that night became our night.

And so, we became the very thing that I'd spent the latter part of my life dreaming of, lovers. We slept in the same room, and instead just used her room to put all of our stuff and clothes in. Everything was so right, so complete, it fit and felt almost like a dream. But it wasn't a dream, it wasn't something that I could've have been scared that I would wake up from. It was real. Every moment, every word, kiss, touch, smile, look, laugh. It was real, all of it.

A year after we officially became girlfriends, I decided to tell my parents. On the holidays, I invited them over for Christmas, telling them that I had someone that I wanted them to meet. They came, and as I scared as I was for their expected reaction, I knew that it would be alright because she would be right there beside me.

Like I said, they reacted as I thought they would, and they disowned me. At least those were their words. I couldn't see anything past disappointed faces and yet strangely enough I didn't cry. I loved her and if they couldn't understand that then I told myself that I would bare no blame. They left before Christmas and went home in the Christmas Eve, saying that they wanted to spend time with their real family. It didn't matter to me.

As important as they were to me, she was just as much if not more so. I knew that my family would likely see that the decision they were making was the wrong one, as did she with her family. We both knew that our families had made a decision to judge us for something that we had no control over, but we also knew that one day they would see that they made a mistake, and when the time came, we would welcome them back with open arms, because no matter what, they were still family, even if they made a stupid decision.

I was waiting for my family to land home since I was going to give them a call. I was going to tell them that I loved them no matter what, and that they didn't have to worry about me because I had someone very special beside me. I was waiting. I never knew that I would have to wait forever. Their plane never made it back, and neither did they.

My family had died.

Reality struck me, and as much as I wanted to go back in time to maybe hold them one more time, or maybe tell them that I loved them, I couldn't. I tried to get over it quickly, tried to force myself to smile, but she knew what I was doing, and she knew that it wasn't healthy and that it would only make me more miserable.

A week after their death, a memorial was held for them and the rest of the crash victims. The bodies were unrecoverable, and I couldn't even bury them. I went back to my parents house and got the things that I thought were most important to each member of my family and buried that instead. I was devastated by their deaths, often getting strange mood swings. There were days when I was unusually happy, and days when I didn't eat, sleep and I caged myself in my old room, trying to fill my mind of old reminiscent memories. She was with me every step of the way, holding me tight when I needed it, and giving me space when I wanted it.

I think I would've died if it wasn't for her.

We were at their grave at one point, and I was just staring blankly at the gravestones, because I was thinking about how it wasn't even their bodies in there. But I knew that what was in there carried a piece of them. And I cried. I cried because I'd never see them again. I cried because my dreams of having them be in my future and me being in theirs completely disappeared. I cried because the people I loved so much, the people that had taught me and guided me and loved me, were gone forever.

I cried because I realized that I was all alone in the world.

There was no one left. No one to hold me when I really needed them, no one to turn back to, and no one to tell me that they would love me unconditionally. Then I just stopped crying. Because there, under the sun with me, was her, her who held me tight in her arms, while I cried about all the things that I had no control over. I spoke only once that day. A simple sentence and it was to her. I think that it weighed heavily on her mind, and it might still today.

"You're all I have left."

She held me even tighter at that, closer to her, burying my face into her shoulder so maybe I might not see her tears. She was all I had left.

Despite the tragic incident, time didn't stop. It never seems to when you want it to. School was back on and we continued on with our lives. I was living while trying to get past something I probably never could. But happier days came back. The days when I could smile naturally came back because of her. She never left me and did her best to make sure that I was fine.

Time passed, and we finished with school. It was time to enter the world of the working class. We were new to the business, so I won't lie when I say that we didn't exactly have an easy first term or so in the large business industry. We both had our ups and downs, but it wasn't long before we finally found ourselves comfortable positions in our jobs.

We moved out of our apartment, and settled for something better for the both of us. We moved into a nice little loft that had just the amount of space for the stuff we both needed for work. We were settling in for a life that we had both wanted. We were in comfortable positions in our jobs, and we spent most of the time we had on days off together. It seemed all too surreal, but it was real, and I was happy.

My work started becoming more and more popular, and so I became busier and busier. But that didn't put a damper on our relationship; we were the same as we always were. The times when we saw each other were filled with happy smiles, and light touches. We had started planning for the future even. Three kids, all adopted. A nice two story house with a basement for entertaining guests, and a bar. We were happy.

At least, I thought we were.