She was dying.

Petra Ral was dying, her short life cut abruptly to an end and now, all she could do was slump at the base of the tree, glassy amber eyes staring off into the distance, feeling her life draining out of her with every second that passed by.

Blood was spattered all around her in irregular, violent splotches that painted the tree trunk dark red and Petra felt wetness on her face... somehow she knew it was from blood and not of tears. She had no more tears left...she was all numb, full of shock, trying to deny the fact that she would be dead in a few minutes. There was no time for tears or hysterics nor could she do anything with her ruined body - the end was coming too near.

She knew her fate was sealed the moment she had panicked and hit the ground, fear clouding her mind and preventing her from righting herself with her 3DMG gear. She knew she was a goner as soon as the Female Titan's one eye zeroed in on her, when the monster launched herself at the terrified soldier, the moment that sinewy foot came crashing down, slamming her into the tree trunk and crushing her body as easily as one crushed eggshells.

A moment of terrible, terrible pain had followed and then... numbness. The numbness of shock and fear had pervaded her body, paralyzing everything, even limbs that shouldn't have been paralysed from her destroyed spine. Petra was helpless, frozen in a grotesque manner, body arched in an unnatural way and she knew that this was the end.

At the tender age of 24, she was to die.

It wasn't fair, she thought bitterly, it wasn't fair.

But life was beautiful and cruel and unfair and Petra found herself almost accepting the life force leaving her body. Almost accepting except for one small bit of unfinished business...she never even got to taste his lips.

"Petra Ral," he stated, voice matter of fact and authoritative, "I am Corporal Levi, your new squad leader."

Petra quivered in her salute, her fists sweating slightly as she clenched it in front of her heart in the salute that was drilled into her since the age of 12. She couldn't believe herself, she was standing in front of Humanity's strongest, starting her tenure of serving him for as long as she lived. For a humble village girl who had joined the Survey Corps 5 years prior, it was hard to believe that she was finally living her dream.

But yet...her dream wasn't completely the same as she had expected. Humanity's strongest was... a surprise.

Petra had expected someone large, strong and brawny, someone who looked like they could take on a Titan with their bare hands who clearly looked like a leader to the Corps; charisma, height, strength and all. What was standing in front of her though happened to be a rather short man only a few centimetres taller than her in his late twenties with a slim but strong physique under his Survey Corps jacket. He was handsome to some extent, with his refined facial features, high cheekbones and the sharp contrast between pale skin and black hair, but striking looking in an elegant but deadly way, similar to the power of a panther - all grace, silence and danger. He had a rather odd haircut -something akin to an undercut with parted bangs in the front. The effect was very severe and austere and a tad old fashioned - this was further accentuated by the odd cravat he was wearing with his uniform, exposing not an inch of his throat and also by the intense angle of his brows which lent him an air of sternness. A pair of sharp grey irises with a certain hardness to them peered out at her framed by narrow eyes - Petra had the impression that he was sizing her up for battle, analysing her strengths and weaknesses and deciding to what extent would he trust her to. Petra quailed slightly at his penetrating glance but held her salute, fist clenched just as tightly as before over her beating heart.

He didn't speak for a moment. Petra had the vague feeling that he was testing her mettle and held her gaze steady, staring into those intense gun metal grey eyes.

After a slightly too long silence where gold stared into silver, Levi lowered his gaze and smiled slightly. Petra's eyes widened in shock at the startling effect a smile had on the Corporal's whole demeanor; he seemed much more human and a lot less intimidating with the slight curve of his lips.

"You'll do," Levi conceded with a slight nod at her then turning to lead her to down the hallway to where the other squad members were undoubtedly waiting.

"Welcome to Squad Levi, Petra."

A single tear slid down Petra's cheek. That was her first impression of him... Intimidation, starstruck adulation and anxiety not to mess up, thinking that he would punish mistakes without hesitation. How wrong she had been about him ... he had a much more caring and passionate side to him within his walls of sarcasm, coldness and intimidation. He was also broken beyond belief on the inside ... something he had hid so well with his apparent invulnerability that she had been the only one privy to his shattered psyche. Oh how strange that she had been the lucky one to be allowed to see past that hard exterior into the soul within... now if only she could see his face again... oh, she would give anything to just see his face one more time, have him comfort her one more time in the final moments of her life before she died... but Petra knew that wouldn't happen. He was too far away, the squad was off route due to the decoy smoke shot fired by the Female Titan and there was no hope, no hope at all of seeing his grey eyes, of hearing his voice again.

The only place where she could find refuge in his presence was in her memories.

He wasn't coming for her in this harsh reality.

A 3DMG rope whistled past her in the air, grapple hook missing her face by a foot and Petra quickly backflipped backwards aided by her 3DMG to avoid the other soldier as he whistled past her, blades drawn in the pursuit of the 15 meter class Titan.

She gripped her blades tightly, flexing her wrists so that the blades flashed through the air and followed the recruit as he spun over roof after roof, blond hair flashing in the sun, in pursuit of the 15 m Aberrant.

They were on a rescue mission to hold one of the smaller outposts outside of Wall Maria from the Titans which had somehow forced their way through and so far, the battle wasn't going too well. They had lost a few dozen soldiers already -many devoured straight into the Titans greedy gullet and reinforcements still hadn't come. Petra counted herself lucky to not have incurred any serious injuries; she was still whole and functioning well, albeit quite fatigued and with superficial scratches that didn't sever muscle. Many of her fellow soldiers had fallen already and one Levi Squad member, Arlhert, had been swallowed before her eyes. She could never get over seeing how quickly life was extinguished, despite the vast number of her comrades who had fallen already that day...

Setting off following the recruit, Petra swung past rooftop after rooftop with her 3DMG, steeling herself for the oncoming battle. The titan in target was a 15 metre class but it seemed aberrant. It was unusually fast and its quick hands had ensnared quite a few soldiers already, crushing their bones and flinging their broken bodies at other soldiers in action. Petra knew this was going to be a difficult fight.

With a yell, the blond recruit she had been following threw himself at the titan's exposed neck, blades whistling through the air, ready to strike the deadly blow. He seemed to almost have victory in his grasp and Petra felt her heart jump briefly in anticipated happiness.

But it came abruptly to an end, the Titan, somehow sensing a presence behind it, whipped its head around and in less than a blink of an eye, the recruit was gone. The only evidence of his existence at all was the 3DMG rope dangling sickly from the Titans grinning mouth as the titan turned around and faced Petra directly, smiling that macabre, bloodstained smile at her, its bulging eyes striking fear into her heart.

A terrible shock gripped Petra and she swung backwards, landing on top of a bell tower out of the Titans arms reach. Eyes wide and mouth open in denial and shock, Petra felt her heart plummet to her stomach and her hands quiver. It had happened so fast that she couldn't even believe her eyes.

One second he was there. Another second... gone.

She couldn't move with paralyzing fear... she had never seen such a death at such close of a distance. This was her first mission, she had been so eager to kill titans on her first mission but now... the sheer ease at which Titans killed humans struck her and she was sinking, sinking down on her knees, clapping a hand over her mouth trying desperately to prevent sobs from escaping and to pull herself together as the carnage raged on around her.

But so many were dead.

Around her, she saw her best friend Cleo get snatched up a distance from her while flying through midair by a Titan and devoured in a gory scene of dark red blood, crunching of bones and a dreadful scream. Petra couldn't move, couldn't move an inch to save her and stayed petrified on the bell tower. Another roommate of hers, Tresa also disappeared into the endless chasm of another Titan's mouth and Petra felt herself going into shock.

Trembling violently, she slumped down on all fours, hands barely able to grip her blades and stared at the brown tiles of the bell tower roof. She couldn't fight. She couldn't fight. She couldn't fight.

Biting her lip hard enough to draw blood, Petra futilely tried to pull herself together but it was hopeless. All her friends were dead, many more will be and she was reminded once again of humanity's weakness in the face of Titans.

There was no hope.

"What are you doing Ral!?" A familiar voice yelled furiously at her. Petra's head whipped up and she stared with wide eyes at the figure which just landed on the roof besides her. It took her a month to register that the person yelling at her was her squad leader, Druvius.

"I - I -" she stammered.

"No time for shock! Petra you're going to get killed if you stay stationary! Get up right away - argh!"

A giant hand came crashing down on the bell tower, sending tiles flying everywhere and the bronze bell to fall clanging to the streets below. Petra was knocked full out of the top of the building and landed painfully unto a neighbouring rooftop below, skidding several metres in a storm of dust, tiles and pain before finally coming to a stop.

Her whole body was throbbing all over, she was sure that she was heavily bleeding and her side was heavily bruised from her fall but Petra barely registered the pain... Druvius was standing exactly where the Titans hand had landed.

He for sure was dead.

A terrible anger suddenly erupted within Petra and for a moment she saw red. That Titan - the same titan which had killed the blond recruit and so many other of her friends - had just taken away her mentor, the guiding star she had for all of her training career. She was not going to let this pass. Oh hell no.

Icy cold resolve gripped her and Petra felt as if ice was flowing through her veins, suffusing her with energy and wiping away her pain and fatigue.

She was so going to take down that Titan. She would kill that or die trying.

With a furious cry, she launched herself at the Titan, her rappel hook dining itself deep within the brick walls of a building near the monster. Her hands were no longer shaking, they were strong and confident gripping her deadly blade, all of her years of training recalled and Petra flew towards the Titan who had its back to her.

Recalling what had happened to the previous recruit who aimed only for the neck, Petra swung towards the Titans naked upper body as if going for the back of the neck and swung away at the last second. Her estimations were right; had she continued on to slice the neck, the monster would have killed her - it had swung around just as it did before and had snapped its teeth shut just feet away from Petra before she had detoured.

Continuing on in a lightening quick dive downwards, Petra swiftly sliced the Titans unsuspecting Achilles heels, reveling in the roar of pain the titan gave and smiling viciously from the feel of the hot blood from the Titan which streamed down her face.

That was for Druvius, bastard, she vindictively thought.

The Titan wavered in its stance, suddenly unable to stand due to having both Achilles tendons cut as well as by two swift cuts which later followed from Petra's sword which severed its hamstrings, and the brute fell, mouth agape in a frighteningly comical expression as it crashed to the street, landing firmly on its buttocks in a ridiculous sitting position.

A zing of 3DMG from Petra and two sickening squishes later followed by a roar of pain, the Titan was then deprived of its vision and Petra was circling around to the back, preparing to strike the death blow.

Suddenly, while flying through the air, she felt a light tug followed by a jerk which tore the breath from her lungs and she was tumbling through the air, being swung from her 3DMG by the Titan which had somehow, even when blinded, caught her. Seconds later, she had crashed into something large and fleshy, blacking out for a few seconds from the force of the impact and had woken to feel large fingers around her and a pair of soulless, regenerated eyes gazing at her in a way not unlike a child playing with a new toy.

This was it, she thought, This is how I'm going to die. Struggling futilely within the titans iron fist, Petra with frightening clarity felt the Titans fingers tighten around her ever so slowly, as if enjoying prolonging her pain by crushing her to death. Full out panic overtook Petra... she felt as if she was in a dream, this couldn't be happening. Yet it was. The titans merciless eyes watched her carefully as she felt breaths squeezed out of her second by second, the bloodstained teeth were revealed in a grotesque grin as Petra felt unbearable pressure as her arms were squeezed to her sides and went numb, and the titan leaned closer, tilting its ear towards her as Petra couldn't keep it in any longer and let out an agonized cry as her ribs cracked. Dizzy, her head pounding and vision starting to blacken, Petra ceased struggling and fell limp against the rough texture of the monster's skin as she desperately prayed to lose consciousness before being devoured.

The teeth were coming closer and closer... her vision was flickering... this was the end.

Not yet.

A flash of dark green and silver hurtled in between her and the Titans gaping maw and then the sound of flesh being severed reached Petra's ears. Half conscious, she vaguely registered that the titan was falling backwards away from her, eye sockets steaming and its flesh already beginning to dissipate. Petra felt herself hit the ground, cushioned by the severed Titan hand which disappeared seconds after impact and a pair of strong arms raise her half up where she felt her pulse being checked. Every part of her felt like it was on fire and her ribs were killing her and she wanted nothing more but to just sleep for a very long time but with enormous effort, she forced open her eyes to see who her rescuer was. Through blurred and wavering vision, she managed to make out a pair of intense steel grey eyes and a flash of white as someone's cravat or shirt (she couldn't tell which) was whipped off and used to stem the flow of blood from her torso.

"Leave - me" she managed to gasp out, pushing the hands bandaging her away. This soldier was going to get killed if he stayed there just to tend to her. Titans were all around and she would just be a hindrance - a hindrance which potentially could endanger this Good Samaritan's life.

"Don't be a brat," the soldier replied brusquely. "I'm not going to let any more lives be wasted than necessary." With that, suddenly, Petra found herself carefully cradled in someone's arms as if she was a fragile baby bird and as the wind blew through her hair, she realized she was being flown with 3DMG.

The last thing she heard from her mysterious savior before she passed out was;

"Keep calm now. You're going to live." added with a quieter undertone of, "Tch. I'll have to get more bleach to wash the stains out now."

Later on, when she woke up in the hospital wing, Petra plucked at the makeshift bandage wrapped around her injured ribs. Although stained heavily stained with her and the Titan's blood, she recognized it as a once pristinely white cravat with the initials of L.A. stitched to a corner.

It was years later before she found out his identity.

She remembered the day that it clicked; the day she realized that the pair of cold grey eyes belonging to her Corporal was the same pair that was clouded over with worry as he struggled to stem the flow of blood caused by the Aberrant Titan on her one and only near death experience.

"Heichou," she said, turning around, 2 mugs of coffee in her hand. They were alone in the Levi Squad base kitchen at sundown; the rest of the squad were resting in their respective chambers after a long tiring day of drills and Petra had decided to accompany Levi to get coffee. He had seemed unusually troubled that day and when she turned around and saw him, brow scrunched and eyes stormy over the piece of paper he held in his hands, she almost dropped both cups. A flash of memory raced through her head and suddenly she knew - she knew exactly who it was that saved her life that fateful day on her first mission.

"Levi!" She blurted out without thinking. Levi's head jerked up and he looked at her with surprise, almost as if expecting a Titan attack around the corner. Petra immediately flushed, embarrassed by her outburst. Flustered, she set down both cups and started explaining excitedly, astonished at the revelation she just discovered.

"I - you - it was you! You were the one who saved me in that battle at Renden! I just realized - your eyes - was it you...?"

Levi's previously tense expression softened and his lips curved in a slight smile.

"I thought you wouldn't have remembered."

"Haha, I didn't - until now! Like that expression - it was the same and ... oh Heichou, thank you so so much! I'm sorry I didn't realize it until now -" she blustered, cheeks heating up. All these years she had been training with him and she never realized that he was the one.

"No need to apologize." He waved away her protestations. "I honestly wouldn't have thought you would ever have remembered. Like, you were barely conscious."

"... Thank you, Heichou." She said sincerely, looking him straight in the eye. "Thank you for that day. It was very selfless of you."

A tinge of color appeared on his pale cheeks. Levi took the letter, his cup and jacket off the back of his chair and abruptly stood up. Petra could see the faint blush but his expression remained as it always was; stoic.

"It was no problem. And it was purely for a selfish reason."

"Wait, how?"

He headed to the doorway and just before he turned down the hall, he looked over his shoulder at her, silver locking with gold once again, an echo back to the old days.

"If I didn't, then I wouldn't have been able to enjoy your company now, right?"

Alas, it was the beginning of a wonderful chapter of her life. Petra remembered the hot summer days that stretched into years, the times where she and Levi grew closer and closer. At first, it was barely noticeable. After being friends for a couple of years, the spark of love grew slowly - so slowly that she didn't recognize it at all in the beginning.

She found herself stealing glances at him more often, checking for his reaction upon every successful training manoeuvre she accomplished. He started watching out for her in battle, always periodically zipping in to make sure she was alright. Coffee times turned into deep and insightful talks which - on their off periods - often lasted past midnight and Petra began to know his features, quirks and idiosyncrasies better than she knew herself.

She started noticing his smile more - and although Levi's smiles were rare, every time he did so, she felt her heart flutter and her own smile automatically mirror his. His grace through the air with 3DMG, although appraised by all, was especially evident to her and her admiration for his skills grew more and more. But it wasn't just the bright moments - the moments when he was a dancing, deadly silver flash spinning through the air as beautiful as Mars in battle - that stood out to her… it was his dark moments too.

Every warrior and soldier had experienced death around them.

Some more than most.

Levi was one who had experienced too many and had wrapped himself up into cold stone walls to avoid shattering his already fragile heart. Petra remembered how, before every battle and mission, just before the Titans came into sight, her Heichou's eyes shut down, as if those intense grey orbs had lost the warm spark of humanity behind them and had become merely mirrors which reflected the world much like their steel blades which wreaked death wherever they hit. During battle, he was purely Humanity's Strongest, all machine like efficiency and battle prowess, soaring through the air as if he had wings and with each blow, Humanity came a step closer to eradicating the Titans. Every order was impersonal, there were no flinches at the deaths that accumulated hour after hour and Petra was astonished at how much control he had over himself. Never had she ever seen a loss of composure from Levi, never had she seen him break down or hesitate in battle. Every movement was sure, steady... and lightning fast.

But once the battle was over and the dead collected, the wounded shuttled to makeshift hospitals and the dying comforted; Petra saw Levi's human side.

He never cried. Not once does she see a tear grace his face but his eyes burned with a deep sorrowful passion as he grasped the bleeding hands of a fallen comrade, assured them that their sacrifice was worthwhile and promised to avenge their deaths. With each death witnessed, Petra saw a splinter of him break, that emotionless facade slowly cracking. With each mission failed, Petra was the one to sit silent in vigil with Levi as they drank bitter black coffee (different from their usual blends) watching the sun rise and mourning their friends and comrades.

Petra realized that he cared - he cared so much for his soldiers and yet the cool mask never completely broke. While she would be sitting there with tears streaming down her face as memories of the fallen filled her mind, he would stay stoic - but the gentle reassuring squeeze he gave as she sat with his arms around her assured her that he too felt the pain.

Who would sit with him when he would grieve over her and Auruo, Erd and Gunter? Petra dimly wondered, her heart wrenching as she realized the grief that would overcome her Heichou. She had no doubt that their deaths would affect him deeply - they were his squad after all, close friends for years who had fought, flown and (some of which) died together and she and Levi ... it was complicated. But he would care.

She loved him; that was no doubt. And Levi... he ... Petra didn't know what to think.

"Petra,"

She jumped at the familiar voice behind her, jostling her horse's reins - she was preparing to saddle it up in preparation for the 57th expedition. Levi was there, his expression more tense than usual and his cravat (unusually) carelessly done up.

"Hi Heichou! Where is your horse? The squad is getting ready to leave in 5 min -"

"There's something I need to tell you."

He was unusually stern and seemed to be struggling with an inner dilemma. Bewildered, Petra nodded for him to continue.

"The upcoming expedition," he started, running a hand through his hair, "I'm not allowed to tell you anything more than what you already know because Erwin -"

"Yes, I know Erwin told you not to tell... that's happened before... but what's the matter? You seem... off." She gazed at him with concerned eyes.

He looked at her and in the depths of those steel grey eyes, Petra saw fear.

"Just be careful, okay Petra? Be careful."

A stirring of anxiety arose in Petra's heart - she knew that in past missions, sacrifices for squads had to be made in order to accomplish a greater goal - such was Erwin's signature - but she doubted that the Levi Squad, the most elite of the elite in the Survey Corps would be sacrificed. Still... there was that nagging feeling...

"Levi, what will happen?" she whispered.

He hesitated a moment and parted his lips, as if to tell her this dreadful secret he was hiding but duty overtook him. He settled into an anxious frown and without warning, pulled her towards him and wrapped his arms around her. Shocked at the gesture as Levi usually wasn't one who was physically affectionate, Petra hesitantly hugged him back and felt his heartbeat rapidly beating against hers as his arms tightened around her and held her there for an unusually long time. The bad feeling she had about the mission deepened.

"I - I can't tell you, Petra." his voice was rough with emotion. "But if anything big happens when I'm not there, get out, do you hear me? I don't care if you disobey the Commander's orders, I don't care if you have the third highest kill count out of anyone else in the Survey Corps... get out. Flee if you have to. Do you understand?" He pulled away, hands still on her shoulders. "Petra."

"I - I can't. I can't abandon my teammates -"

"Petra, this is important. I - I mean, we - we can't lose you."

"But -"

"Listen to me!" he growled, cradling her to him again as if he would lose her if he didn't hug hard enough. "If anything really big and dangerous happens and you're on your own with the squad but without me - and this is a direct order from your Corporal - yes I'm pulling rank here - you have to flee.

"Please."

Stunned into silence, Petra slowly nodded.

"Promise me."

Silence.

"Petra..."

"... I promise, Levi."

Looking back, Petra regretted that promise - but she also regretted disobeying his promise. It was because of that that she stayed behind with Auruo, Erd and Gunter to fend off the Female Titan to buy time for Eren to escape. It was because of that that she risked her life - and ultimately lost her life in that battle.

Obeying that promise meant she betrayed her brothers in arms.

Disobeying meant that she had forsaken her love and lost her life.

"I'm sorry Heichou..." she whispered through lips caked with blood, through crushed lungs and half lidded eyes glazed over in pain. If she opened her eyes just that much, she could see an outline or a distortion similar to Levi ... but it was all a hallucination and she knew it.

She wasn't going to be able to see him before she died.

"I'm sorry Levi... Goodbye."

A whiteness was overtaking her, she felt the pain in her damaged body dissipate and her soul detach itself from its broken vessel and she was flying without 3DMG, lighter than air, more ephemeral than the wind.

She left with the words "I love you" still on her lips.