I have a life again.
Months—wonderful, joy-filled months—pass too quickly. No matter how hard I try to hold on to the time, make it last just a little longer, it passes, and a new day begins. I am so used to the time being so long in Lee-kun's absence that I will now have to desensitize myself to this disconcerting speed. Because, you see, Lee-kun's absence is now a rarity.
I realize that I am now going regular time, not slow-mo. Strange.
I look at him. He looks at me. I frown. He smirks. That smirk is the most terrifying thing I've ever seen. I want to scream.
His red eyes bore holes into my skull, and I fear for my life.
Where is my green protector? Can't he tell that I'm in terrible danger, a worse danger than ever before?
"Sakura-chan," the shadow of the man I once loved says. His voice is so different from the one that I once adored that I cannot feel relief that he recognizes me.
I want to run.
He steps forward, his arms outstretched. I cannot move. He wraps me in a tight embrace, and his name escapes my stony lips.
"Sasuke."
"That's right," he says in his horrifying new voice. "Now, aren't you glad I got rid of that green idiot? Now you're all mine."
"Lee-kun?!" I whisper.
"Lee-kun!" I scream, sitting up immediately. "Leeeeee-kuun! Please no, LEEEEEEEEEE-KUUUUN!"
My mother runs into the room, her eyes bugging out of her skull. "Sakura?" she shouts over my wailing.
"Not Lee-kun!" I bellow, burying my face in my hands, sobbing. "Not him, too!"
"What's wrong with Lee?" Kaa-san asks, sitting in front of me. She grabs my wrists and moves my hands from my tearstained eyes. "Oh, baby," she says, wrapping me up in her arms, "it was just a nightmare."
"But Lee-kun—"
"—is fine. It was just a dream, honey. I promise."
I rub my eyes. The tears cease, and I begin to notice the brightness filtering into my bedroom. So much different from the dark bleakness of my dream.
I have to see him, to make sure he really is alright. He should be returning from a mission today. Maybe I'll meet him at the gate.
"Arigato, Kaa-san," I say, pushing her arms away and standing up. "I'm going to go shower." I wonder if she's noticed the light sheen of sweat on my brow.
It's been almost a year since a nightmare has made me scream. I feel like such a baby. I stalk to the bathroom with a scowl on my face.
After I'm dressed, I head straight to the village gate. I'll wait here all day if I have to. I mustsee him. I have to see if the red-eyed demon really diddo away with my reason for being.
In-ha-le. Ex-ha-le. My breathing is strained as I try not to let my nightmare get to me. It is irrational—childish, even—to let a dream scare me this way, but I can't help it. A nightmare's a nightmare.
Besides, he'll probably enjoy seeing me. He'd tried to get me assigned to the same mission, but Tsunade-sama hadn't wanted to have to pay one more salary than required for the mission.
Sigh.
"Waiting for something, Sakura-chan?" comes a voice from behind.
I turn my face a little to the side, and I see Ino-chan out of the corner of my eye.
"Hai," I say.
"Lee-san?"
"Hai."
"Why?"
Because I need to make sure that the object of our previous affections hasn't run a sword through his gut. Duh, why else?
"I just want to see him."
"They probably won't be back for awhile," Ino-chan says, and I turn to face her.
"And?"
"Don't you think you'll get bored waiting?" She raises her delicate blonde eyebrows.
"I might," I admit. "But it's the end product I care about."
She smiles. "You really love Lee-san, don't you?"
I smile in response. "More than anything. More than I loved…" I don't finish my sentence, but she understands.
Suddenly, she grins. "Guess what!" she demands.
"What?" I ask, shocked by her expression.
"Someone sent me a rose!"
"Who?"
She shrugs.
"Shouldn't you know who? I mean, you do workat the flower shop, don't you? Couldn't you just look back on whoever's bought a rose recently?"
Her face crumples into a frown, and the contrast between her current and previous expressions is nearly comical. "As if I haven't thought of that, Forehead." She sighs. "I was off-duty the day it was bought, and my mother refuses to tell me who bought it." She grins again. "But a rose is a rose, right?"
I nod, smiling.
"Well, I've got to get back to the shop. Wanna come? Maybe find a nice 'welcome home' flower for Lee-san?"
"Hai. I think I will." After all, Ino-chan is right. He probably won't be home until this afternoon.
I end up buying a bouquet of white heathers.
"Uh, arigato, Sakura-chan," she says, looking incredulously at all the money in her hand. "You sure do go all-out for the guy you love, don't you?"
"I miss him," I reply, shrugging indifferently.
"Do you mind if I ask you a question?"
"Shoot."
"Why white heathers?"
I smile. "He'll know."
She smiles, looking a little disappointed.
I hear a tinkle from the bell over the door, and turn to see Akimichi Chouji in the doorway. He sees Ino-chan, and his face turns red.
"Ohayo, Chouji-kun," Ino-chan says cheerfully, and at the moment, their eyes meet, I see a familiar expression change Chouji-kun's features. I've never seen this face on Chouji-kun, but I've seen it a million times…on Lee-kun when he looks at me.
So Chouji-kun loves more than just a good meal.
"Ohayo, Ino-chan," he replies, still red-faced.
I take one look at Ino-chan's face and know that she will not hesitate to accept Chouji-kun's affection. I only wonder when he'll come out and say it…
I decide to give them a little privacy.
"Ja, Ino-chan. Ja, Chouji-kun," I say as I walk towards the door.
Ino-chan sends me a ja but her secret admirer doesn't seem to notice anything but the blonde in front of him.
I walk back to the village gate with a smile, lighthearted and maybe a little lightheaded.
I stand in front of the gate.
Impatient.
Away from the calming aroma of Ino-chan's flower shop, anxiety starts to sink back into me.
I have to breathe.
I can't.
I'm too scared.
Why do I have this feeling of dread? It was just a dream, right? Dreams don't mean anything.
Right?
Inhale.
The breath catches in my throat as I see the green smudge on the horizon, flanked by a whitish and a pinkish smudge. I smile instantly, and hold the bouquet closer to my body. The smudges get progressively bigger, as if he's running to meet me.
But something is wrong. There is only one green smudge, there is too much green, and said green smudge is much too top-heavy. Running too slowly, as if carrying a heavy burden.
No.
A terribly selfish thought creeps into my mind.
Please let Lee-kun be carrying Gai-sensei. Please, Kami-sama, let Gai be the injured one! Please!
Finally, they are close enough to show me the last thing I want to see.
Gai-sensei looks furious and agonized at the same time. Tenten-san looks desperate, and Neji-san does not look like himself. He looks as though a…brother…is in danger.
Finally, I see my green love cradled in his sensei's arms. He is unconscious, and his face is too pale, too sallow, like he's lost a lot of blood.
My knees shake.
His taijutsu suit has been torn up to his knees, and blood-soaked bandages replace his usual legwarmers. The same goes for his arms. There is a slash on his neck, just missing his jugular.
Gai-sensei rushes past me, and I feel Lee-kun's hand graze my cheek. This pushes me over the edge. My knees buckle and darkness consumes me.
Exhale.
Please, no.
A2 here. I'd like to take this space to thank those who reviewed and/or favved my first fic, Breathing. It gave me the confidence--and the initiative--to edit this first chapter enough so that it was semi-presentable. I've still got to work on the next few chapters, but i wanted to get the ball rolling. Sorry for the length (or lack thereof). I tried to find a good place to cut it off, and this was it. Again, thank you so much to those who took/take the time to review. it makes me a happy A2, and a happy A2 makes a happy, fluffy story. ;-)