The Gleek, the Warbler, and the Wardrobe

Author's Note: As noted in the summary, this is not a crossover with The Chronicles of Narnia; it's just that the title seemed perfect for this crack!fic. When the idea first hit me, this seemed like a one-shot drabble, but muses are fickle things. And, needless to say, I don't own Glee or any of its characters. I do own the Wardrobe, though. :-)

In terms of setting, this takes place after "New York." Kurt is back at McKinley, Blaine is still a Warbler.

As Kurt walked into his bedroom just ahead of Blaine, he swore he could feel the Warbler beaming. "Thank Carole for those leftovers, will you? They were delicious!"

"Glad you liked them. I'll be sure to tell her when she gets home," said Kurt as he sat down at his computer to check his e-mail. Burt and Carole were off enjoying a night out, while Finn was at Puck's place griping about being single, so, for once, the two boys had the house to themselves.

Blaine sat down on Kurt's bed, and glanced outside. While it had been sunny that morning and much of the day, as they were eating dinner, both boys had noticed storm clouds gathering as they often do in early summer; a much-needed rain seemed imminent. Just a few seconds later, both boys heard a few loud claps of thunder, and then the sound of raindrops against the window and roof of the Hummel-Hudson house.

Blaine sighed. "Well, there goes my idea of taking a walk outside. . . . the umbrellas would just get in the way, and the rain would ruin your shoes."

A few seconds later, Blaine heard Kurt murmur the word "umbrellas." But then Kurt was silent for a while, seemingly lost in thought.

After what seemed like an eternity, Kurt turned around. Blaine saw a grin on the countertenor's face.

"I've got an idea," said Kurt, half-singing. "But we need to drive somewhere first."

"Where?"

"McKinley."

"Why?"

"It's a surprise, but trust me, you'll love it."

"Well, if you put it that way," said Blaine, getting up and walking over to Kurt, "why not?"

A half-hour later, Blaine and Kurt were at McKinley, standing in front of a janitor's closet near the Glee Club.

"Here we are," said Kurt, with a big smile on his face. "The surprise is right in there."

"A janitor's closet? Huh? And don't they normally lock the doors to McKinley on the weekend?"

"First, yes, they do lock the doors, but that doesn't matter right now. Second, it's not the closet that matters, it's what's in the closet."

"You mean like K—"

"Blaine."

"Sorry. Couldn't resist. Is he—"

"Yes, Blaine, he's still in the closet. But that's not why I brought you here. Open it up."

Blaine turned the handle, to no avail. Blaine wondered. "Kurt, the door's locked."

Kurt blushed a little bit. "Oops. Right." Blaine saw Kurt's face once again bore that look of intense concentration. After a moment, he relaxed, and Kurt said, "Not anymore." Blaine tried the door again, and it turned easily in his hand. Blaine, a little stunned, walked in, found the light switch . . .

. . . and was underwhelmed at what stood before him.

The only thing in the closet was what looked like a large, wooden supply cabinet, about six feet wide, and a bit taller than Kurt. Blaine thought he saw what looked like a large scorch mark near the top of the right-hand door.

"OK. You brought me here to see a supply cabinet? Really?"

"Oh ye of little faith," said Kurt. "This is not a supply cabinet. This is New Directions' Wardrobe." Kurt stressed the last word so much Blaine swore he could almost hear a capital W.

"So?"

"Well, open it up."

Blaine did. Inside were a bunch of mops, and some shelves holding various cleaning supplies.

"Isn't a wardrobe supposed to hold clothes?"

"Yes, Blaine, it is. Now close it up again."

"Why?"

A slightly impatient Kurt asked, "Just close it, will you?" Blaine did.

"Now what?"

"Give me a moment, OK? " Kurt said, still with just a hint of diva in his voice. Blaine looked at Kurt again, and once again saw that look of concentration on the taller boy's face. "OK, open it again."

Blaine opened the wardrobe, and was stunned to find that the cleaning supplies were gone. In fact, the entire cabinet had been reconfigured: now it really did look like a wardrobe, with a set of shelves from top to bottom in the middle, and a pair of racks for hangers on either side. One of the shelves now held a pair of top hats, while to the right side of the cabinet were a pair of white button-down shirts, a pair of vests, and two pairs of slacks.

Blaine blinked several times, utterly confused, and a little scared. "Kuuuurt, where did those clothes come from?"