FLASHBACK:
'...I'm waiting for you to do the right thing." Reid said calmly to the 'lady'. 'She' remained expressionless.
'Then I'm afraid you'll be waiting for a very long time.' 'She' said as 'she' took another swig of the ciggarette.
The team on the jet at night, relieved from a hard case being closed (except Reid), slept in their usual seats. Morgan listening to his I-pod, JJ sitting in the back watching the clouds; half asleep. Hotch thinking on the seat across the aisle from JJ. Prentiss sleeping on other seats off to the side, and Rossi reading his book tiredly across from JJ. Hotch had been making small glances at Reid. Spencer Reid seemed 'off' a while. Ever since the end of the case. Reid had thought Hotch would be the one to notice his behavior first and talk to him, but Morgan did.
FLASHBACK:
"It's time to go kid." Morgan said as Reid continued to stare at the waves below him. "Reid." He tried. "What's eating you?"
"We've taken the victim into custody and let the abuser go free... I don't see that as much of a win." Reid explained.
"A lot of lives are going to be saved now that Amanda's off the streets. You know that."
"I just wish I could've noticed the signs in time to save Adam." Reid said, still not turning around.
"Talk to me. What is this?" Reid turned around.
"Tobias Hankel." Reid answered cautiously. Morgan didn't know what to say. The name hadn't been brought up in years.
"Tobias Hankel drugged and tortured you for two days. He almost killed you." Morgan said, confused at the connection.
"No he didn't. The alter persona of his father did that. The real Tobias... saved my life." Reid turned back around.
"You're going to have to accept the fact that sometimes we can't save everyone." Morgan walked away, leaving Reid hurt. He was begging for help. Why else would he bring Tobias' name up. He flashed back to the night he 'died'. After that horrid two days, he was dead.
As he stared out the window, reviewing what happened. He didn't know Morgan could be so careless. Twice, he's cried out for help, but he answered with cold advice. He didn't know where to turn anywhere, no one to talk to. He couldn't talk to Hotch, he wasn't the type to be sympathetic, JJ was just not a good person to talk to, and the rest, they couldn't help him... he was alone, just like while he was trying to overcome his addiction... alone.
He didn't notice the tear strolling down his face like a careless walk in the park. Hotch, however, noticed it and sat across from him. Reid still didn't notice anything, except the vivid detail of his past and present memories. Hotch had to say something to snap him out of his thoughts.
"Reid..." Reid 'woke up' from his thoughts. He immediately wiped his face and turned toward Hotch. "Are you okay. Morgan told me about what you told him. I just want to make sure that..."
"I-I'm fine." Reid's voice was shaking, while trying not to break down crying. When he noticed the look Hotch gave him, he said, "really."
"Why are you crying then? I know when one of my family members isn't alright." Reid's heart pounded with joy. Hotch called him 'his family'. Someone did care, but they couldn't help with his feelings, though.
"It's just... Adam reminded me of... him. He saved my life, you know that. Now, I wasn't able to save Adam. I know the signs, it's all my fault. I couldn't save him in time. I could have prevented him from getting trapped... I could've..." Hotch cut him off.
"Listen. None of this is your fault. It's nobody's fault. I promise you... it had nothing to do with you. And the thing with Tobias, it has no relation. You do not owe anybody anything." Reid nodded and let a few tears sneak out of his eyes.
"I just... I wished I could have saved him."
"We all do, but sometimes, our power can't do all that we wish." Hotch lectured. "You are the youngest, but the smartes, you've proven that, but our minds are equal in power when it comes down to the things like DID. But we can prevent the world of serial killers step by step. We are changing the world, just in a small, but big, way." Reid realized that he couldn't save Adam, but he did have the next victims to worry about just as much, so he'd have to learn to compartmentalize, somehow with and eidetic memory, to save the soon potential victims.
"I understand, but I can't get it out of my head. I can't forget." Hotch nodded.
"All of us remember things we don't want to, but in time, the memory will soon dull, but it'll always be there. Let it be a lesson that we can't save everyone, but it gives us a reason to work harder to save others." The words that Hotch said inspired Reid so much, he stopped his tears and remembered Adam, analyzed it. Profiled it. Now, he knew how to handle the next cases they'd probably work tomorrow, and so-forth.
"Thank you." Reid said gratefully. Hotch nodded and rewarded Reid with one of his rare smiles.
=================================== Later:
"Amanda... you need to tell me where Adam is. You do want what's best for him, don't you?" Amanda nodded.
"But I need to protect him from all these horrors."
"I can protect him... you can let me take him off your hands. I will take care of him." Reid tried.
"You can not protect him the way I have."
"You don't protect him. You hide him. You've locked him away from the greatness of the world..." Reid persuaded.
"And the stuff that you see everyday. Tell me Doctor Reid... do you see this a lot? Sexual sadists? Dissociative Identity? Drug abusers? You can't take care of him. You will give him the burden of those things everyday he is exposed to people like you. Only people like me can protect him." Amanda countered.
"But I can help him through it. Please Amanda. Let me help Adam." Reid pleaded.
"No... I will never forgive you with what you've already exposed him to. And like his father, you shall be punished for it."
Reid saw a figure in the hands of Amanda as she lifted it to point it at his head. He panicked.
'Click'
A/N: Awwwwwww... dang it. That was supposed to be a oneshot. Not a prologue to a multi-chapter. Ohwell. Hope I can update three stories in one night. Cheer me on my Genius, Doctor Spencer Reid loving, sadistic stalker fellows! ;-]