Disclaimer: Dick Wolf and NBC own "Law and Order". I don't. (But if I did, this fic and all its sequels would be CANON.)
A/N: So, this is where it gets personal—LOL, personal to me, that is. So, after "L+O" ended (if you're still bitter like me, raise your hand), I thought of this entire storyline for how I would personally continue the series. I guess you could call this my AU of sorts. LOL That's how I see it. I mainly consider it my head!canon. This series has nine installments so far. This is the first installment.
As I said in the synopsis, this is post-"The Taxman Cometh". It's inspired by an absolutely adorable and heartwarming moment in the episode, as well as just by my own imagination.
I'm dedicating this ficlet to Linus Roache and Alana de la Garza, as well as June. Hooray for awesome people! 8D Abby
Nothing
Connie had smiled and nodded her way back from the courthouse to One Hogan Place. She could hear Mike talking about Judge Laramie's ruling and hear his rant about how disgusting it was that this country claimed to be "the Land of the Free" yet still insisted on treating homo- and bisexuals as second-class citizens—but none of it was sinking in, registering. It was like tuning a radio—pressing the button and alternating between clarity and static.
The two of them were currently working on a different case—Mike was reading a motion filed by the defense, and Connie was researching on her laptop—or trying to. Try as she might, she simply couldn't get something Mike had said during the motion hearing out of her head.
"'For better or worse'?" Judge Laramie had bantered with Mike. "Are you trying to conduct a wedding right here, Mr. Cutter?"
And then Mike had said, with a bashful smile, "I would if I could, Your Honor."
Wait…what?
Was Mike saying he would…?
Connie had played it cool, just giving a small, casual smile, while inside, she'd been hoping against all hope that she wasn't blushing. Her heart had begun to race. Her mind had been racing at a speed that felt fast enough to rival that of sound.
And now, as she stared at her laptop screen without actually focusing on it, Mike's words were truly starting to sink in, the full weight of what they implied hitting her head-on.
"I would if I could, Your Honor"…
If he had his way…
It would be her…
Connie had known for a while that Mike was attracted to her, but it wasn't until their most recent cases that she started to see just how much: the Marcus Woll debacle, the Stuber appeal, and now…
Connie knew that it wasn't merely an attraction. It was much more than that—so much more.
Michael Cutter was in love with her.
The thought took Connie's breath away.
She knew she was in love with that wonderful man, too.
But the whole situation was just so unfair. How was anything ever supposed to happen between them when they worked together like this? Why the hell were they even put in this situation if nothing could ever become of it? It hurt Connie very much, putting everything into perspective like that. She wondered if it hurt Mike, too. Probably—and just as much as it hurt her.
And the thought of anything hurting Mike hurt Connie.
What a mess…
God, this sucks, she thought.
She looked over at Mike. He was reading over some files at his desk. She could tell he was tense because he was absentmindedly tossing his baseball into his mitt as he read. His sleeves were rolled up, he'd taken off his tie, and his blonde hair wasn't combed back. She melted a little, watching him.
A couple moments later, Mike got the feeling he was being watched. He looked up, and his eyes met Connie's.
"What?" he asked tenderly.
"Nothing," Connie lied, quickly returning her focus to her laptop screen, her face feeling hot as she blushed.
Her heart had begun to race, as well.
A pause followed their brief conversation.
Then—
"I'll be so relieved when we're finally finished with this case. It's definitely been one of the more irritating ones, wouldn't you say?" Connie said, attempting to quash the awkwardness.
"Yeah," Mike agreed.
"But then Jack will probably have us put the Coulson case on the top of the priority list. I think that one's shaping up to be a real challenge, too. But it's us. We'll get through it. We always do. Jack has a lot of faith in us, and I do, too," Connie went on with a warm smile.
"I couldn't agree more," Mike said sweetly. He hesitated for a moment and then said, "Connie, there's something I have to tell you."
Connie's heart began to race again. What did he have to say?
"What is it?" she asked him, knowing by the tone of his voice that it was a big deal.
"Connie…I—I know I should've told you this a lot sooner, but no time seemed to be the right time. We've been so swamped lately, and there was that whole fiasco with that son-of-a-bitch Woll, and then I had to deal with the State Bar and the knife that Emily Ryan was kind enough to insert into my back. My timing's absolutely horrible, I know, but I need to tell you. I'm so sorry for my terrible timing. Connie, I…I'm leaving. I'm transferring to the Queens D.A.'s office. Their EADA retired not too long ago, so there was an opening…"
Connie stared at him in disbelief for a moment.
"Why?" she then asked, finding her voice.
"I can't tell you that here," Mike replied. "But I owe you an explanation, and I will give you one, I promise, just not here. I promise you I'll explain everything. Can you trust me on that?" he asked her, his heart racing.
"Yes," Connie replied. "But Mike, that's—"
"—a hell of a bomb to drop on you. I know," Mike said, finishing her sentence. "Connie, I'm so sorry," he apologized earnestly and sincerely. "I'm so sorry. But again, I promise you, I'll explain."
"I know you will," Connie said. "I trust you."
"You're probably so furious with me right now," Mike said softly. "I know it's—
"—coming completely out of left field," Connie finished his sentence. "Yeah…But you were looking for an opportune moment that never came. So I'm not furious at all. I'm not even annoyed…I'm in disbelief, and I'm sad…Have you cleared this with Jack yet?"
"Yes," Mike replied. "He seemed reluctant, but he said he completely understands."
Connie nodded slowly.
"So when will you be leaving?" she asked.
"In a couple weeks. I'll be here long enough to see our trial cases through to the end," Mike replied. "You and Jack are the only ones who know right now. I—I told him not to announce there'd be a job opening until I talked to you, so…now I have to tell him I talked to you…"
Their eyes met again.
"You should go for it," Mike told her softly.
"Go for what?" asked Connie.
"The EADA job," Mike replied sweetly. "You should put in for it. I think it belongs to you. You're a hell of a lawyer…Go for it, Connie."
They held each other's gaze for a moment.
Then—
"Well," Connie said, "in that case, I'd better make sure my resume is up-to-date."
"You're really going to put in for it?" Mike asked her, lighting up.
Connie melted at his encouragement.
"Yeah, I am," she said, smiling again.
"Great!" Mike said, his mood considerably lighter.
He smiled sweetly, making Connie feel a rush.
Trying to catch her breath, Connie smiled back at him.
"So, we're still on for Tom's wedding, right?" she then asked.
One of their co-workers was getting married that upcoming Saturday. Since they'd both been invited, they'd decided to go together.
"Yeah, absolutely," Mike said.
There then came a pause.
"I'm still trying to process the fact that you're leaving," Connie broke the silence.
"I'm so sorry, Connie," Mike said softly.
"It's all right, Mike," Connie said. "Like I said—you were waiting for an opportune moment that didn't come. There really wasn't a good time for you to break this to me. It's okay."
"Yeah…" Mike said softly.
He sighed.
"I'm gonna go talk to Jack—tell him I've talked to you," he then said.
"All right," said Connie.
She watched him leave.
When Mike entered Jack's office, Jack was just hanging up his phone.
"My bureau chief for White Collar just accepted a job in the U.S. Attorney's Office. I just set up an interview with a prospect from Brooklyn. She's been prosecuting white collar crimes for fifteen years," he said. "Anyway, what do you need, Mike?"
"I, um…I spoke to Connie just now," Mike replied.
"Did you explain why you're leaving?" Jack inquired.
"I'm not admitting anything here. We aren't all as shameless as you, Jack," Mike said bluntly.
"No need to be like that—I was just asking," said Jack.
"I'm sorry," said Mike. "This whole situation's just got me really on-edge."
He sighed heavily.
"I'm afraid this is all going to blow up in my face," he said. "In fact, I expect it to."
"Have faith, Mike," Jack said with a kind, paternal air.
He smiled and patted Mike's shoulder.
While that was going on, a thought occurred to Connie as she sat alone in Mike's office.
She'd actually had to ask him why he was leaving? She couldn't have figured it out on her own and much sooner, at that?
Now that she knew, she couldn't stop wondering when he'd finally tell her himself because she wanted him to so badly.
