Disclaimer: Only the spontaniously combusting monkeys belong to me-nothing else. HP is JK Rowlings. Don't sue.
Note: ummmm........I'm too tired to make a note. Just one little widdle thing-this story is odd. It is pointless. It is short. Please review.
The Monkeys are Spontaniously Combusting!
"The monkeys are spontaniously combusting!" Harry Potter looked up from the clementine orange he was peeling, an expression of confusing plastered on his face. "The monkeys are spontaniously combusting!" Hermione came running into the room, her hair flying wildly behind her, her eyes wide.
"Er, Hermione?" Harry started quietly.
"huh?" she asked, nearly overbalancing as she stopped in front of where Harry sat.
"What was THAT?" he asked, biting into a slice of orange.
"The-monkeys-are-spontaniously-combusting." Hermione leaned forward and repeated slowly.
"ummm.....yes.....but what does it MEAN?"
"oooh," Hermione straightened grinning. "What does it MEAN?" she looked thoughtful for a second, then shrugged. "I dunno. I guess it means that the monkeys are spontaniously combusting."
"ummm...." Harry looked at his friend even odder. Okay, that made no sense, he'd try a different track. "What monkeys, Hermione?"
"Why THE monkeys, silly!" Hermione grinned and ruffled her friend's all ready ruffled hair. "What other ones would I talk about?"
"Where are the monkeys, then?" Harry asked, patting his hair down again. Hermione had really made it spike.
Hermione looked crossed eyes for a moment, then shrugged. "Here and there," she answered, grinning. "Hey, can I sit down with you?"
"Sure," Harry responded-but he wasn't about to let the question of spontaniously combusting monkeys go unanswered. "Anyways, about the monkeys-how do you know their combusting?"
"They told me," Hermione said as she settled herself beside her friend. "they may be smelly, but they are very nice." she thought for a moment. "And polite, yes, they're very polite too."
OKay, so the spontaniously combusting monkeys were nice and polite and they talked to Hermione. That was okay, right? Harry wasn't too sure. "If you don't know where they are, Hermione, how could they tell you that?"
Hermione looked outraged. "I know where they are!" She declared, but her anger evaporated almost immediately and a far-away look appeared in her eyes. "And I told you-they're here and there....."
Harry sighed and pulled another piece of orange peel off the clementine. "Okay........HOW are they combusting, Hermione?"
Hermione looked at him oddly. "It's not that hard-you just......combust. Boom!" She giggled.
Harry fell silent. He didn't really know what to say-what COULD he say? He was quiet and peeled his orange and thought about other questions to ask his friend. Maybe he should get Dumbledore........
"Hey, could I have a piece of that?" Hermione asked, pointing to Harry's orange.
"Huh?" Harry looked started for a moment.
"Could-I-have-a-piece-of-your-orange?" Hermione said simply, putting a lot of space between words.
"I heard you," Harry mumbled. "And sure," he pulled off a piece and gave it to his friend, who popped it in her mouth. Another question came to Harry, but he had to chew hi own piece of fruit before asking. As soon as he swallowed, he said; "So, about the monkeys-"
"Monkeys?" Hermione asked, looked at her friend oddly. "What monkeys?"
Harry's eyes flew open in renewed surprise. "THE monkeys, Hermione," he said. "You know, the nice, polite ones that are spontaniously combusting...?"
Hermione gave Harry the most bizzar of looks, and stood up. "Monkeys? Harry, there aren't any monkeys in Hogwarts-and they wouldn't spontaniously combust....maybe you should see the nurse....eep! Look at the time! I'll be late for history!" she left quickly, leaving a very confused Harry in her wake.
THE END.
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