A Man That Never Would

by Isender

There are many things that should happen and even more things that shouldn’t. I know this more than anyone. “This is impossible.” She whispered in my ear as I held her in my embrace tighter than I ever had before. "I never should have left you Rose." R&R

1. Chapter 1

I understand a lot of things. I'm smart like that. But sometimes I don't understand why sad things happen. Why do I always lose the things I love the most?

I thought of the pain the loss caused within me. The sight of Gallifrey burning in the havoc I caused. Rose kissing a man that wasn't quite the person she loved. But he was the best I could ever give her. Donna's memories burning, Darvos himself, burning and everything always is burning. I sighed. Why must I always question things? What is up with my desire to always understand? Especially when I question things those are irreversible. The time lock around Gallifrey permitted me to never ever see it again. Why couldn't I be selfish? Taken Rose for myself. My human hybrid counterpart be damned, I'd take her to the stars and back before he realised it was me she loved. If only Gallifrey wasn't gone I could travel the alternate universes and pick my Rose from the garden.

Suddenly an idea so ridiculous, unfathomable and frightening formed in my complex head. Dalek Caan went into the Time War and dragged Darvos out. He broke the Time Lock, he must of or otherwise he never would have survived. Eurgh my head hurt from all the thoughts and ideas forming. If Caan broke the Time Lock on the Time War it meant that it is open for manipulation. I needed to close it. But that wasn't all. If the Time Lock is broken it means I can harness the science of Time Lords and fashion myself a sort of shield on the TARDIS so it can fly through any Time Area. Like the Void.

"Rose." My voice was barely a whisper. It would take weeks to build efficient equipment to close and mould the Time Lock. I would have to watch Gallifrey burn again. And then there was the blunt issue. Could I be selfish enough to take the power? Normally I wouldn't even consider benefiting myself from such a situation. I was a man who never would. But for Rose, I rationalised, it would be worth it. I would create a way to travel through alternate universes like the Time Lords used to. I could never stop Gallifrey from burning but I could use the planet's inevitable destruction to propel the TARDIS through the Void and by manipulating the Time Lock I wouldn't destroy the fabric between the universes. It all worked out. I could be happy.

All thoughts of my human hybrid counterpart gone from my mind, I thought only of Rose and how her face would look when I told her I loved her for the first time.