Hello, my lovely readers. I really have a thing for song fics right now. Plus, Demi Lovato is my idol and I just love this song so much. This is pretty much all I have to say. Enjoy, guys.
Dedicated to one of my best friends, Amanda. Thank you for being there for me, beautiful. I love you and miss you so much. I'm sorry I couldn't save you. But, I'll see you one day, promise. RIP.
(I recently found out she had committed suicide. She was an internet friend of mine, and a very dear, close, best friend. She hadn't replied to me in months and I finally got the answer as to why she's been gone. Please, please, seek help if you're suicidal. Talk to someone, anyone. You're life is too precious to lose. People need you. Because this feeling right now? It sucks. People love you. I love you. So don't do it.)
I do not own any of these characters or the song (Nightingale by Demi Lovato).
I can't sleep tonight
Wide awake and so confused
Everything's in line
But I am bruised
I need a voice to echo
I need a light to take me home
I kind of need a hero
Is it you?
Tonight was like every night. I can never sleep. I find it impossible.
So, instead, I find myself tossing and turning, trying to forget everything that happened. Trying to forget that you're not here with me anymore.
If it wasn't for that stupid drunk driver, you'd still be here with me. You'd still be my best friend.
I miss you.
I need you.
I'm seriously going insane without you. Even though, yes, it has been seven years.
Nothing feels like home anymore. You were always my home – my refuge. Whenever anything was wrong, I'd just run to you and you'd make everything better without even knowing it.
Still, for some reason, even though you're not with me anymore, I sometimes feel like you can still be there for me. All I need to do is just look for you and find you.
I never see the forest for the trees
I could really use your melody
Baby I'm a little blind
I think it's time for you to find me
But it's hard. Searching for you is just too hard – it hurts too much. My chest feels like it's going to concave and crush my heart whenever I think of you.
Maybe my pain is just blinding me. Shouldn't I be thinking of all the good times? Then it might not hurt so much to think about you.
I need your help. I don't think I'm going to be able to find you on my own.
Can you be my nightingale?
Sing to me
I know you're there
You could be my sanity
Bring me peace
Sing me to sleep
Say you'll be my nightingale
Another week has gone by slowly. I'm always so numb and lacking motivation – weeks seem like months to me.
Tonight, as per usual, I couldn't sleep.
Maybe if… Maybe if there was just some way for me to know you were still here with me, I'd be able to get through life easier. It's just hard, you know? It's hard not knowing if you're okay. That's what bothers me. Not me being okay but for you being okay. I want to know that you're fine – that you're happy.
Can you please find a way to tell me? I honestly think once I know, I may be able to let go a bit. Not completely of course, I'd never be able to do that. But… it would help me a lot.
It's like when we learned about all those animals in the third grade. Remember that one bird? Called a nightingale. It's song is so calming and soft it can help people relax and sleep. Yeah, that's what I need you to be. A nightingale. My nightingale. Do you think you could do that?
Somebody speak to me
Cause I'm feeling like hell
Need you to answer me
I'm overwhelmed
I need a voice to echo
I need a light to take me home
I need a star to follow
I don't know
I can't do this anymore! Life is too much for me. Everyone is always asking me question after question and won't leave me alone! This is way too overwhelming!
You want to know who the only person I want to talk to me is? It's you. God, I need you right now. I feel like hell.
I don't… I don't even know anymore.
I never see the forest for the trees
I could really use your melody
Baby I'm a little blind
I think it's time for you to find me
I've learned to like night. Well, at least a little bit.
Sometimes, I like to imagine it's you when I hear that rare sound of a bird singing at night. I know it's not though. Things like that don't happen, right? No matter how much I want them to.
But, do you think it could be true? Are you finally trying to find me?
Can you be my nightingale?
Sing to me
I know you're there
You could be my sanity
Bring me peace
Sing me to sleep
Say you'll be my nightingale
I don't know what I'd do without you
Your words are like a whisper come through
As long as you are with me here tonight
I'm good
For some reason, I feel a little bit better tonight. As I'm getting in bed, prepared for another long, sleepless night, I feel comforted in a way. Protected. Like someone's with me.
There might not be, though. Maybe I'm going crazy without you. I never knew it would be this hard without you. I hope you miss me too.
Just for tonight… Please be with me. I'll be fine, but only if you're with me.
Can you be my nightingale?
Still so close
I know you're there
Oh, nightingale
You sing to me
I know you're there
This past month, I've slept soundlessly every single night. Every single day has gone by faster and I've been, well, I've been happier.
I swear I really am going crazy but, I feel you with me now. I swear I can hear you whisper to me sometimes saying that you're okay and that I'll be okay. And, I don't have any doubt anymore. I know it's you with me. Because you'd never leave me – that's what you told me. I'm sorry for ever doubting you.
Thank you, Gary. Thank you so much. I love you.
'Cause baby you're my sanity
You bring me peace
Sing me to sleep
Say you'll be my nightingale