The Journal of Miss Gertrude McFuzz

by Funkywatermelon

On The Fifteenth of May, Miss Gertrude McFuzz realized just how special Horton was, but she knew to approach him would end in a fail, cause who'd love a bird with a one feather tail?

Ok, I know I've been talking about that "Notice Me Fandom" stuff, well, here's something I'm doing about it! Here's the story that I wrote so that people will know about Gertrude! It's basically her diary during MY version of how she was brought into the story (Since I am partial to BOTH Seussical AND Horton Hears a Who, I made my OWN version of what happened… let's say that Seussical did not happen, and the movie Horton Hears a Who did… so, yeah, this is happening about a year or so after that!) Well, I hope you enjoy peeking into the private pages of one of Dr. Seuss' lesser known characters!

Disclaimer: I do not own Dr. Seuss and thus, none of these chars are mine, I just like to play "Cat in the Hat" and mess with them a bit!

THE DIARY OF GERTRUDE MCFUZZ: KEEP OUT!!! THIS MEANS YOU GARY!

May 2

I don't even know why I just put that "stay out" notice… I guess it's just habit. Well, Good Morning Diary, it looks like it's just you and me now, mom and dad just left us on our own. Said that since I haven't had any luck finding a guy back home in Brazil, that perhaps a change of location would do me good. So, here I am, in my new house, In the Jungle of Nool… Somewhere in the Congo of Africa, and I have no idea what to do next. We spent all day yesterday moving me in. Uncle Dake helped; he's the reason that they moved me here in the first place, so I'd have family nearby. He's also supposed to alert my family if I FINALLY settle down and get a new family of my own ha! As if that's ever gonna happen! Y'see, all us McFuzz's have one feathered tails, which all my male cousins and uncles think is perfectly fine, but get this, I am the ONLY original female McFuzz, all the other girls were married into our family, and they have nice tails with three, four, or even FIVE feathers! Me, one… one little ole feather. My little brother Gary said that I should give it a name like he gave his; I told him it was a stupid idea. I mean really, why would I give my tail, which I HATE a NAME? I'm not going to give it that privilege. Oh well, at least my house isn't bad, it's a cute little cottage up in a tree, like a tree house or something, and my neighbors don't seem too bad, there's nobody on one side of me but right next door is this elephant named Horton who apparently has lived here for almost forever and seems to be quite kind. He actually helped us out a little bit yesterday, and actually spent time to chat with me! The first time a guy's actually done that! Heh, either way, he's a teacher, so he's real busy all the time and the chances of us being friends are slim to none, I mean, him being so busy and all. And the only other animal that lives in our little area of the forest is this other bird girl named Mayzie who is also from the Amazon Rainforest, she moved here a few months ago but is one of those "Pretty Birds". She's bright red and has… get this, eight tail feathers! EIGHT! Lucky girl, I wish I had that many. At least she has more than that jerk Lolla Le Lou had back home she only had two… eat THAT Lolla! Ehh… maybe I'm being to mean to her… Nah, she tortured me all through middle school.

- Gertrude New Girl in Town McFuzz

May 10

Well, here's something interesting for you Diary! Today I had my first visit with Kangaroo, the head honcho around here. At least it's a GIRL here! Back in Brazil, our boss was a guy and he gave the guys all the benefits, talk about being a jerk. Kangaroo's not bad either, just stay on her good side and you'll be fine, also she has this SUPER cute little boy, Rudy, who is in Horton's class. I know this cause she came over to my place to talk about the rules of the jungle and such and about halfway through our meeting, Horton returned from work and had brought Rudy along with him. Either way, Rudy was all excited because apparently Horton had let his students talk to "The Whos" today. Kangaroo saw that I was confused and told me the entire story of how about a year ago Horton had found this dust speck that had a civilization living on it. So he took a clover and somehow got it on there, then she said he spent like, a whole WEEK trying to get the clover to a safe place, even though nobody else in the entire jungle believed there was a civilization on that clover in the first place! Wow, right? I mean someone who's got the guts and kindness to do that HAS to be a good guy. The bad thing was, Kangaroo was unable to finish the story so, I'll just have to wait until our next meeting in a few days to hear the rest… perhaps I can get Horton to tell it to me. Geez, I'm giving myself a headache, I gotta go take a nap or something!

- Gertrude Wants To Hear the Rest of the Story McFuzz

May 15

Here we are, one year after Horton's "Who" adventure and lucky for me, He offered to let a bunch of the jungle citizens gather around while he told the story himself. And OH MY GOSH!!! That guy is AMAZING!!! Not ONLY did he ignore the citizens who were teasing him, he chased after Vlad (The vulture, apparently there's two Vlad's in our jungle, Vlad Vladikoff, a vulture and another Vlad who is a bunny who likes to bake cookies, I've met the bunny already. He gave me a nice batch of "Welcome to the Neighborhood" cookies, although Horton's were better.) And after Vlad had dropped the clover in the great clover field (Not to self, check that place out, sounds interesting…) Horton looked for an entire day until he found it! Then he got tortured by the Wickershams… I mean… Wow, he is absolutely… wow. Ok, Ok, I admit it; I am in love, not just in love… WAAAAY in love like, head over heels, no way I can deny it love. The problem… heh… It's ME we're talking about… I mean, who's gonna love a bird with a one feather tail… y'know? Maybe if I find a way to make my tail prettier or more attractive he'll start to like me… Well he likes me already, as a good neighbor but… I definitely want more than that! Oh well, perhaps I can write a song or something to get him to like me if the tail thing is a bust… That just might work… but, I'm a terrible singer! Oh well, I'll let you know diary if I come up with something good that he's going to like! I just wish I could wave a magic wand or something and make him fall in love with me. Gosh, I am so in love right now, I'd write our names in here next to each other to see how they look, but, I'm 27… that'd look weird… OH, what the heck?

Horton & Gertrude

Gertrude & Horton

Horton & Gertrude

Gertrude & Horton

Looks good!

- Gertrude Head over Heels in Love McFuzz

August 13

Ok Diary, if I haven't written in a while, it's for good reason. I've been SO busy trying to get Horton to notice me that I've even been falling behind a little bit at work! It's not that big of a deal though, I mean, being Uncle Dake's secretary isn't all that exciting. After saying "Doctor Dake can see you now." For the twentieth time, you get tired of it. He doesn't mind either, he's just glad that I've fallen in love with SOMEONE even if it is an elephant. (We haven't told mum and dad yet, they'd flip if they knew who their 'little chickadee' had fallen for). As for the tail thing, a total bust, everything I tried, ended in failure. Curling the tail? Burned it almost to a crisp, took two weeks for it to heal! Dying the tail? Ended up some sickly green puke-ish color. Puffing the tail up? That was a bust, ended up looking like a bunny rabbit or something. Decorating the tail with flowers? Let's just say that bee stings to the behind are not comfortable and leave it at that. So, I gave up and began working on songs, I figured that if the material in the song was good enough, Horton wouldn't care that I was a terrible singer, and he would fall in love with me! So I tried and tried but all 436 songs just are not good enough for him. I don't think I'm ever going to win him over… well… there is ONE thing that I haven't tried, Mayzie, the bird girl who lives on the other side of Horton's cave caught me in the middle of practicing song number 437 (that one also stinks) and suggested that I try another tactic with my tail, seeing if I can get my uncle to give me a pill or something to make it grow. What a great idea right? I mean, I've hated this one feather tail for my entire life and I never thought of actually getting a doctor to do something about it! I'll have to see if I can get Uncle Dake to help me out. One interesting thing about Mayzie's visit though, she seemed a bit exhausted almost, and it looks like she's gaining a bit of weight too… this has been going on ever since her return from her vacation to Fort Worth a few weeks ago, What's going on?

- Gertrude Never Give Up McFuzz

August 16

What a great few days this has been! Ok, well first off when I got to work on the fourteenth, my uncle said we were going to have a very slow day, what a great opportunity, right? I immediately asked him if he could find me some pills to make my tail bigger and he said that I was being silly and that my tail size was perfect for my body. I couldn't take that though, I mean, my relationship with Horton was on the line here! So I threw the biggest fit I have ever had which, astonishingly enough convinced him to bring me this bush with pillberrys on it. I wanted my tail to be absolutely astonishing, bigger than ANY other birds in the world, so… I ate every single berry on that bush, and get this. IT WORKED!!! I, Gertrude McFuzz now have TWENTY tail feathers! I have never been happier in my entire life, I'm a bit scared to show Horton though, plus I'm having a bit of a hard time trying to get used to getting around with this BEAUTIFUL tail behind me, I don't want it dragged along in the dirt or anything. So earlier today I found out that Horton was going to go and chat with his who friends on the top of Mt. Nool again, and desperate as I am, I followed him, all the way to the cave at the top. But even though I went up and tried continuously to get his attention (I even said straight out "I love you Horton!" but, he didn't hear me, or at least he didn't take notice) , all he could focus on was his friends on that clover; finally I just sat down and listened to his conversation with them. He was talking with the mayor who seemed to be quite funny, some of the stuff he said even made me giggle! Wow, I mean, Horton is such a great guy, just hearing the nice conversation he was having with one of his friends made me like him even more. Morton, his mouse friend told me to just give up, that Horton has never taken notice of a girl before and that I am wasting my time trying to get him to love me. What does he know? Morton may be his friend but I'm his next door neighbor and even though he's not in love with me yet we do chat sometimes. I am NOT going to give up, not yet. I'm sure that as soon as Horton sees my beautiful tail, I'll be his… I hope.

- Gertrude Twenty Feather Tailed McFuzz

November 29

This has been the worst week of my entire life. But I should probably explain a few things before I start talking about the bad things that happened to me. Well, we figured out what was up with Mayzie, she was preggers. Seriously, she was pregnant! Mayzie LaBird, while on her little trip to Fort Worth, had apparently spent some time with a guy and ended up with child. Then this guy just leaves. He leaves Mayzie to take care of this egg on her own, and, well, being Mayzie it's just too boring for her so she ends up after like, a day or so of sitting on it, asking Horton to sit on it for her while she goes on vacation! Horton of course, being the wonderful guy that he is agreed to help. He's doing such a wonderful job with the egg, it's just… wow, he's amazing, the problem is that was two months ago. Mayzie's still not back! So Horton's been stuck on that egg for this entire time! Kangaroo's had to take over his class since he can't teach (He won't let me sit on the egg for him… he's so faithful!), and I've been spending my time helping him out anyway I can, bringing him food and water, blankets, scarves, all kinds of stuff, but he STILL hasn't noticed me. But that's not the WORST part! Ok, Last night there was this HUGE ruckus in the jungle, and, like the smart girl I am, I stayed in my tree house, out of the way. I shouldn't have. This morning when I went over to the tree where Mayzie had left her egg with Horton… IT WAS GONE!!! Horton, the tree and the egg, ALL GONE! And there were human boot prints all around the area, and Tommy (another one of Horton's students) had found a pamphlet for a CIRCUS! Horton had been KIDNAPPED to be in a CIRCUS! All because STUPID Mayzie had to take advantage of MY Horton!!! He's gone. I still can't believe it. I-I don't know what to do, I mean… I tried to fly after him but… My tails to big, there, I said it, my tail is too big for me to fly. How STUPID can I be!?!?! Poor Horton, he must be so scared out on a boat somewhere going across the ocean. I gotta do SOMETHING! I think I know what I have to do… I have to get rid of my tail. It's so pretty, but, Horton never even noticed it and, he needs me. I'll do it. I'll do it for him. Wish me luck.

- Gertrude Saddest She's Ever Been McFuzz

April 20

Well, here I am, almost half a year has past since my last entry and I STILL haven't found Horton! I miss him so much, not a night goes by that I don't dream about him. The worst part is, he's probably either not even thinking about me… or worse… he's dead. Ohhhh, I HOPE he's not dead! I don't know what I would do if he was. Every moment that passes I get more and more desperate, desperate to find him, desperate to tell him how I feel. I've already decided that as soon as I save him, I am going to tell him how I feel! Maybe he'll like me back, maybe he won't but at least I can get this off my chest. Well, I should probably start from the beginning of my journey, catch up so to say. I went to Uncle Dake and begged him to pluck my tail, which he did, leaving me with, once again, a one feather tail. But… It's for Horton, so it'll be worth it. Although it's obvious that Uncle Dake is never going to let me forget that experience… I must have screamed so much that I lost my voice, cause I was unable to talk for a few days after that… man it hurt! When I got to the first town on the list of places the circus would be (thank you Tommy for finding that pamphlet!) of course, they had already come and gone. So, since my wings were tired, I took a ride on a boat, that is, until it started to sink and I ended up having to fly HALFWAY across the ocean! I swear if anything comes out of this adventure it's that I will have great arm muscles by the end. So I finally get to the next town, and guess what!?!? They had already been through there too! So, I headed towards the next town, and it didn't seem to bad, just walking along through some woods, not too bad, but then… I walk right into a beehive! So now in addition to having sore wings, I now have scars all over from where bees stung me. And then when I get to the town after that, the circus has already gone through! It's like; the world doesn't want me to be with Horton at all! But, Horton means the world to me, I'd do anything for him so, I keep going. My next step was to walk through this DISGUSTING swamp, and I was doing an ok job at it… until this dog comes chasing after me and attacks me! I now have a bandage on the wound from where he grabbed me with his mouth, and I just KNOW it's going to leave a scar. And this town I just checked had the circus here two weeks ago… at least I'm getting closer. Except the pamphlet got wet in the swamp so now it's like, in five pieces… Oh, Horton, where are you? I need to find you soon!

- Gertrude on a Rescue Mission McFuzz

December 25

Merry Christmas Diary! I'm sure having one! Well, I should probably explain first… So after my last entry (a whopping eight months ago!) I traversed through this enormous blizzard getting sick during the process (of course). The town after that didn't have the circus anymore so I keep going. I reach this cliff and the winds on there somehow catch my pamphlet and blow it over the edge, so I run to grab it and get this, I trip over the edge and fall all the way down! Ouch! But I did manage to get the pamphlet, so that was good, but I sprained my ankle (The bad one that the dog had grabbed) so now it hurts to walk on it but, I kept going. Palm Beach is heavily populated so I had to be careful going across the streets, and I thought I was being careful but… somehow this eighteen wheeler popped up out of nowhere and hit me head on! I must have been passed out for quite some time because I woke up on the side of a road (thankfully somebody had the courtesy to move me to the side so I wouldn't get hit again). And what was right in front of me? THE CIRCUS!!! I had finally found it! I stagger on into the empty place (it was Christmas Eve after all!) and basically peek in every single tent until I find the one where they are keeping the animals. And there he was! He was perfectly fine, taking a nap of all things! I immediately ran over to him and squeezed through the bars of his cage then woke him up. Now comes the best part, remember how I said that as soon as I found him I would tell him how I felt? Well diary, I did just that, I told him all about my journey here and everything I had been through to find him and how I felt about him and … and… oh… I dunno if I can write this without squealing… HE LOVES ME! HORTON LOVES ME!!! By coming for him, I won him over! I still can't believe it! I mean, really all I did was come here to help him… but… he loves me!!!! He's SO sweet; after he acknowledged that he loved me as well he gently picked me up with his trunk and gave me a big hug. Then he moved the straw in the nest around so that I could snuggle up next to him and also prop my injured leg up. When I began crying after being snuggled up for a few minutes, he asked what was wrong I told him that I couldn't help it, and that I was so happy and relieved that after a year I had finally found him and that he loved me. He didn't say a word; he just took his trunk and gently wrapped it around me in a hug. Then, when I looked up at him, his eyes were filled with tears. I asked him what was wrong and he told me that he thought no one would ever come for him and that he would be stuck there forever, he was just as relieved that I had found him as I was! I didn't say anything; I just gave his trunk an affectionate squeeze and snuggled up closer to his side. On a different note, the egg hasn't hatched yet… Horton's so amazing; he's been taking care of it this entire time! He told me that Mayzie had come a few months ago and told him that he could keep the egg, that she didn't want it back. Good ol' Horton, he really deserves it, I mean, after taking care of the egg for so long, he should get to keep the child inside as his own. He's really gotten attached to the egg too; he says that he wants to name it Morton if it's a boy, but that he hasn't really thought of girl names yet. Horton and I stayed up so late last night just talking and laughing and telling each other our life stories, I've never been happier. I have no idea how we're gonna get back home. I didn't think of that when I left the jungle; I just wanted to find Horton. But, as long as we're together, I'll be just fine. Right now everyone in the tent's just chatting about random things and spending time together, Horton's talking to the giraffe in the next cage while I'm snuggled up beside him giving my leg a rest and writing in you diary. I could be in this moment for the rest of my life; I never want it to end. This is undoubtedly the best Christmas I have ever had, even though we're like, not celebrating at all!

- Gertrude Horton's Girl McFuzz

January 1

I don't think I've ever been as nervous as I am right now! Horton and I were just spending time together on Christmas Day and who should show up but Kangaroo! Apparently Mayzie, after telling Horton that he could keep the egg, changed her mind, and instead of just coming to him and telling him that she changed her mind, she decided to go to Kangaroo and claim that he had STOLEN her egg from her! MY Horton, stealing someone's egg? Ridiculous! He would NEVER do something like that! But either way she's made a citizens arrest against him and now he has to go to trial to see what's going to happen! He could end up getting to keep the egg and everything is going to be ok, but, if Mayzie wins, then Horton could be sent to the jail we have in Nool, or worse, kicked out of the jungle altogether! If that happens, I'm not going to be permitted to ever see him again! So here we both are, sitting on the boat that is taking us back, just holding onto each other like it's our last day together. I've kinda gotten attached to the egg myself in the past week, it actually responds when you talk to it. It doesn't talk back or anything but the baby inside does tap against the shell! Poor Horton though, he gets seasick really easily so not only is he extremely nervous which would make him queasy enough, but the boat's movements are making him feel just awful! All I can do is just sit there next to him and stroke his face and trunk to distract him from feeling bad, talking to him helps too. I'll tell him about all the fun things he's going to be able to do with his new kid when it hatches, and how nice it is going to be to be back home in the jungle and he can continue his teaching job. My poor poor Horton, it's just not fair. What does Mayzie think she's getting out of this? I know one thing, if she messes with MY guy, she's going to have to deal with me, and I am certainly going to have some choice words with her once we get back!

- Gertrude Not Letting Mayzie Off Easy This Time McFuzz

January 15

Well, we got home in one piece, that's good. FINALLY being back in the jungle after being gone for more than a year just, it feels great! Horton was especially happy to be able to talk with his Who friends again and even let me talk with them for a little bit, they were really fun! I wasn't able to talk to Mayzie so that's not good, well perhaps it's for the best, I probably would have just gotten us into more trouble than we already were in. The day after we got back was the day of the trial and EVERYONE in the jungle had shown up to see what Horton's fate was going to be. Lucky for me, since I was his girlfriend, they let me sit right next to him. He told me afterwards that if it weren't for me being there, he probably would have broken down and gone completely bonkers, he was so worried. Well the trial was pretty much your typical trial, with Mayzie claiming that Horton had stolen her egg from her so that he could be in the circus (As if!) and Horton claiming that she had asked him to watch it for her and that she stayed away a year longer than she said she would and that she had told him just a few weeks ago that the egg was his to keep. But just as the judge (Kangaroo… of course) was going to claim that Mayzie (Who had somehow gotten almost every adult in the jungle on her side) had won and that Horton would have to leave the jungle (meaning I'd never be able to see him again) the egg, that I had put in my lap for safe keeping began moving! At first I thought it was my body shaking since I was so upset about the prospect of never being able to see the guy I love again, but then I began to see cracks on the shell. The egg was hatching! I quickly moved it to the ground and got everyone's attention. Horton, Mayzie and Kangaroo all ran over to where I was with the hatching egg and we all watched as the baby finally broke through the shell and revealed itself. I don't think I have ever seen anyone with a more shocked face than those who saw the beautiful baby boy that had been in that egg. It was clear from the first time I saw him that he was VERY VERY special. This little boy was basically a little baby elephant that was completely grey except for the tiniest hint of red on his tail and on the wings that were where his front legs should be. A real true Elephant Bird. Kangaroo took one look at him and looked over at Mayzie and told her that this new piece of information was going to have to be considered in the result of the trial, so, we had some more things to talk about before we could make a decision. You should have seen the grin that Horton and I shared; he might not have to leave after all! Horton happily cradled the small child as Kangaroo explained that since the baby was half elephant half bird there was no way that a simple bird like Mayzie was going to be able to raise him, THEN she went on to explain that for the same reason, Horton was not going to be able to raise him either. The downcast look on Horton's face was too much for me to bear; I wasn't going to just let them take his little boy away from him! I stood up and before I even knew what I was doing shouted "I'll help him!" everyone in the clearing turned and stared at me, Horton had a look on his face that was a mixture of shock and pure admiration, Mayzie looked like she could not believe what was going on. When Kangaroo asked me what I meant I told her that I meant exactly what I said, I would be there to help Horton raise his adopted son, I explained that it's understandable that just a bird or just an elephant or even a couple of birds or a couple of elephants would be unable to give this child the special attention that he would need, but perhaps a bird and an elephant working TOGETHER would be able to give him a proper upbringing. From across the clearing Uncle Dake smiled and gave me a thumbs up. I was so scared; I felt beads of sweat trickling down my face. Finally Kangaroo smiled and told me that I made a lot of sense, but, how could she be sure that we would stay together and take care of him until he was grown up? How could she be sure of that if we were just two creatures that lived next to each other and were in love? Horton smiled at her "That's not a problem." He said cheerfully then looked over at me "Gertrude, you are amazing." He said "You have done so much for me, and Morton" he looked down at his little boy who was staring around at everyone "without expecting anything in return. You literally spent a year searching for me with nothing but a piece of paper that told you where I was supposedly going to be. That, if nothing else, has proven to me that you are worthy of being happy, of, having a family of your own, and I would be honored if you would allow me, and Morton here, to join it. So whaddya say, do you want to be my mate?" As you can imagine diary, tears were streaming down my face by this point, not only had Horton just confessed his love for me in front of everyone in the entire jungle of Nool but, he was asking me to be his mate! I was so shocked that all I could do was nod vigorously and whisper a hoarse "Yeah!" Horton beamed and ran over to me and while still holding Morton picked me up in his trunk as well, and gave us both a huge hug, I hugged them back, crying my eyes out. And just like that we were mates! Horton had a few tears but was able to contain them I however took a few minutes to calm down. Kangaroo's face was one of pride when she looked at Horton and I and said that from that point on Morton, the small little Elephant Bird was officially our son. Mayzie looked a bit saddened but afterwards when she came up to me instead of being angry and yelling at me, she just shook my hand and simply said "You earned it." Uncle Dake ran over to me and gave me one of those hugs where they spin you around he then continued to tell me how incredibly proud he was of me and how brave I had been in there. I smiled at Horton as I realized that I had been brave in there. If this trial had taken place about two years ago back around the time when I first moved here, there would have been NO way I could have done this. So, here I am a few days after the trial, living in Horton's cave with him and our wonderful son, Morton. Horton's getting a new bed set up for Morton who is taking a nap right next to me while I write this final entry in my journal. The clover that holds Horton's who friends is now sitting on a rock shelf that we found in the very back of our cave, so now Horton can talk with them all he wants and it doesn't have to become a day trip to do so! As for my old house? I let Mayzie take it, sort of a "thanks for giving us your kid" type of thing. I should get going, it's almost time to get ready for bed but, rest assured diary, you will not be forgotten, I will be sure to keep you, as a memory of how much I have grown in the past two years. Goodnight and Goodbye diary, it's been fun, thanks for helping me through this adventure, I couldn't have done it without you, well, time to go to bed now. I'm not scared to go to bed anymore because there aren't any more nightmares, my life is so perfect, and I can't wait until tomorrow!

- Gertrude No Longer McFuzz

I hope you all enjoyed this look into the private journal of Miss Gertrude McFuzz. If you want to contribute to the "Notice me Fandom!" Cause… please write a Gertrude story of your own, it doesn't have to have her as the main character, just have her included! Maybe you can send her and her "Orton boys" to Whoville for a vacation or something!!! Since it's Seuss world, you can do whatever you want! So, thanks again for reading Gertrude's Diary. R&R!