Fish Juice?!
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Mineral Town was a quiet little burg, kept running with a tidy, simple trade system - it played host to some of the region's finest seafood, valuable medicinal herbs, rare delicacies grown in the wild, and succulent produce.
It also played host to a number of personalities - some bright and bubbly, some sharp and snappy, some sweet and meek, and most others laid-back and simple.
It was on a fine July day that an annual visitor to Mineral Town could be found, enjoying the blazing heat of the summer sun, sizzling his tanned skin to a crisp. Kai Zher dangled his feet over the edge of Mineral Town's only dock, fishing pole in one hand, beer in the other. The water was fine and glistening with the blinding brightness of the sun's diamond reflections, the breeze softer than his head.
Ah, beer and angling - the good life. A quiet day to enjoy taking advantage of Mother Nature's special children. The lure bobbed quietly in the water, silvery-blue fish darting past it without a second thought. Perhaps he'd underestimated his prey...
If I were a fish...
Kai thought, suddenly halting. If he were a fish, what? If he were a fish, he would... be a fish. Nothing terribly exciting.The subject of his ponderings jolted him back to attention with a mild tug on the line. Aha! Fish!
With little effort, Kai reeled in the marine beauty, watching it flop and wriggle on the dock helplessly, gasping for its precious saltwater. Hohohoho...
Kai studied the poor, doomed bastard for a few moments, with something akin to pity flashing briefly in his dark brown eyes. With a tender touch that he usually reserved for himself, he scooped the beautiful creature up in his rough, calloused hands, bringing it up to eye level. He stared into the cold, black pools, those dead, yet pleading depths... he felt an understanding with the fish, a connection with its mind, its heart...
So he squeezed it in one fist and ripped its head off with his teeth, chewing sloppily as the fish's guts dribbled down his chin. Crunch, crunch, crunch went the fish's skull. "Achum, achum, achum!" went Kai, his noisy mastication echoing off the beach's rocky cliffs.
With a casual flick of the wrist, the rest of his meal was tossed into his gaping maw! He caught the headless corpse in his gleaming teeth, stained with the innocent's blood, and shook it around feverishly, like a dog with a toy! "NAWM, NAWM, NAWM!" Kai growled as he chomped violently, biting into his own lip without a care! He tossed his head back and let out a deep, hearty belly laugh, one filled with malicious glee!
"AHAHAHAHAHAHA-RK!"
The laughter ceased, all of a sudden. Kai started to gag. His hands clasped his throat! Oh, shit! He was choking! He began to turn blue, then green, then yellow...
...As he fell to the ground and began to writhe, his face finished its proper progression through the shades of the rainbow, climaxing with a brilliant indigo before fading. Kai was no more.
So came the cue. A slimy, gigantic tentacle slithered onto the dock, wrapping around Kai's limp, lifeless abdomen, around the sweet, round curve of his buttocks...
...As the giant squid pulled its prey into the water, its mind was clouded with lust and glee. Kai had killed one of its brothers of the sea... so cruel, so cold, so merciless... this could not go unpunished.
And the giant squid wanted to get some ass, in the process. It had been too many years since it had taken the innkeeper's wife.
Yes... Mineral Town was a quiet little burg...
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Always wait an hour after eating before you go swimming!