Interview for Toofan Express
Today is a regular day at CID Bureau. Regular in the sense as actually regular, not a part of some harebrained idea of an idiotic fanfiction writer (ahem... me... ahem) which is soon about to be changed.
Pradyuman is at the headquarters for some meeting, a kind courtesy of DCP Chitrole. So our good officers are enjoying their senior free time doing their own leisurely work.
Meaning Pankaj and Freddy are raiding the little fridge at the bureau, Abhijeet and Tarika are chatting at his desk and Purvi is posting images on social media. Daya? Well the poor guy is wailing to himself. Need I mention why?
That's when someone came into the bureau. Everyone immediately left what they're doing, anticipating some excitement. Daya especially was looking forward to slap some criminal. To their utter disappoint it was Patrakar Popatlal who came in.
"hello everybody" Popatlal wished merrily but no one paid a heed. Abhijeet and Tarika continued their chatter, Freddy and Pankaj continued to stuff their mouth, Purvi took a selfie of herself and posted on insta (insert wild roars and applause) and Daya continued to mutter to himself "excuse me? CID Bureau!? Patrakar Popatlal here"
"huh nh tuh mh dekhh" Pankaj said his mouth still stuffed "huh busyh haih"
"are par aaj mein aap logo ke liye kuch interesting laya hoon" Popatlal informed
"hume nahi lena aap GokulDham walo ka case" Daya waved dismissively "Hume Chalu Pandey ne bataya ki aap log kis tarah pehle report darj karte ho aur phir khud hi case solve kar dete ho"
"aur nahi toh kya" said Abhijeet in agreement "agar ab civilians cases solve karne lage toh humara yaha bees saal tak kaam karna bekar ho jayega"
"mere toh followers bhi kum ho jayege" Purvi nodded in agreement
"aur Smita phir roz mujse hi ghar ke kaam karwayege" said Freddy in horror "jab bureau me hota hoon tab kum se kum jadu pocha toh nahi karna padege"
"eh I don't mind" Pankaj shrugged "mein pura din meri girlfriend ka sath spend kar pavuga"
"but then you'll lose your coolness" Tarika pointed out
"are par mein koi case darj karne nahi aaya hoon" Popatlal informed "mein toh aap logo ko international level par famous karne aaya hoon"
"international level" asked Purvi perked up "kaise?"
"mere Antrastriya Akhbaar, Toofan Express me aap ka interview print karwa kar"
"hum ne kal usi newspaper par chane khaye the na Pankaj" asked Freddy
"are wo toh purana Akhbaar hoga" Popatlal insisted "mera Akhbaar bohut famous hai"
"haan itna famous ki Bhandup ke bahar koi us Akhbaar ko nahi kharidta" Daya said dryly "hum logo ko interview nahi dena"
"please sir" Popatlal dived at Daya's feet and got a firm hold on them "please mein deadline par hoon! Agar aap logo ne interview nahi diya toh mujhe mere editor se dant padegi"
"aur agar ACP sahab ne reporter bureau me dekh liya toh tumhe tadipar kar dege" Tarika pointed out
"par aap log toh waise bhi time pass hi kar rahe the na" Popatlal pointed out
"tum sab se pehle mera pav choro" Daya said trying to pry his leg free to no avail
"mein nahi choruga" Popatlal said firmly ignoring the fact that Daya's leg could accidently crush him "please sirf ek chota sa interview"
"de do Abhijeet" Tarika said
"magar Tarika ji, protocol ke hisab se hum log aise hi interview nahi de sakte. Plus abhi tak Popatlal ne bataya bhi nahi hai ki use kis case ki jankari chahiye" Abhijeet pointed out
"mujhe kisi case ki jankari nahi chahiye" said Popatlal still holding Daya's leg firmly "humare readers ye janna chahte hai off duty humare CID officers kya karte hai"
"personal interview" asked Freddy "agar wife ke bare me kuch ulta seedha tum ne chap diya toh deewar par meri photo chap jayegi"
"I won't, I promise" Popatlal assured "sirf ek chota sa interview"
"aacha thik hai" Daya said in frustration "jab tak tum mera pav chodte ho mein koi bhi interview dene ko taiyar hoon"
"thank you very much sir" Popatlal snuggled to Daya's leg
Few minutes later they're sitting in the guest waiting area of the bureau, Popatlal with a notepad and a pen in his hands.
"aacha kya puchna hai aap ko" asked Pankaj
"personal baate" as everyone gave him grim looks "m-mera matlab aap log kya karte ho jab aap log badge aur gun neeche rakh dete ho"
"badge aur gun neeche hum sirf marne ke baad rakhte hai" Abhijeet informed and the officers nodded
"ah very well" Popatlal noted it down "toh aap log 24 hours duty karte ho. No shifts"
"haan hum pura din duty karte hai" Freddy sniffled "ghar par wife ki aur yaha Pradyuman sahab ki"
"are are wife ko kyu kos rahe ho" said Popatlal abashed "are bade kismat walo ko milti hai biwi"
"ek dum sahi kaha aap ne" said Daya nodding in agreement
"naya naya toh sab aacha lagta hai" Pankaj countered "magar baad me pata chalta hai love karne kitna mengha hai. I mean come on, har hafte ka ek anniversary gift. Aur phir "baby chalo na aaj movie dekhne jate hai." Are waha ke food par kitna GST lagta hai pata hai. Aur phir "baby chalo na thodi coffee peete hai". Yaar hum non corrupt officer log hai. Aise bekar me itna GST kyu pay kare"
"toh officer Pankaj GST ke khilaf hai" Popatlal said noting it down
"are are mein toh sirf keh raha hoon" said Pankaj frantically "no offense in any sense about any step take for public betterment, neither by me nor by the writer"
"noted" Popatlal said
"Abhijeet" Tarika glared at our favorite cop "tum bhi aisa sochte ho jab tum har Friday mere liye chocolates late ho"
"are are Tarika ji wo Pankaj hai aur mein Abhijeet hoon. There is a difference! Sub-Inspector, Senior Inspector"
"dono ka short form toh SI hi hai na"
"aap dono aisi halki nok jok" asked Popatlal suggestively
"are kaha" Daya said carelessly "ye Abhijeet sirf badi badi baate karta hai. Aaj tak usne Tarika ko officially kuch nahi pucha"
"aye Daya tu zyada mat bol" said Abhijeet warningly "kum se kum meri ek fixed toh hai. Teri toh roz fluctuate hoti hai"
"Senior Inspector Daya is a playboy" Popatlal noted down
"are are ye kya bakwas likha rahe ho" said Daya frantically "meri toh ladkiyo ke bare me kismat hi phuti hui hai. Meine jis ladki ko like kiya wo terrorist nikli. Dusri wali undercover cop thi. Ek se toh baat Maa Baap tak pohuchi thi magar is Abhijeet ke chakkar me break up ho gaya"
"are meri kya galti agar tera hone wala sassur khooni tha" said Abhijeet defensively "aur kitni sari ladkiyo ne tere chakkar me jurm kiye hai. I can recollect 5 cases on top of my head. Kisi ko bhi haan keh deta. Shayad ab tak mujhe chacha kehne wala koi aa hi jata"
"aur Shreya" Daya accused "agar tum use us din wo letter de dete toh sab thik hota"
"Mukandar ka Sikandar nahi dekhi kya" Abhijeet retorted
"usme usne kisi aur se love letter likhwaya tha. Tum toh courier wale the"
"guys" Tarika said exasperated "Daya galti tumhari hai. par kitni sari what if stories hai. Kisi bhi ek ko read kar ye matter solve ho sakta tha"
"don't you think episode air hone ke baad log fanfiction likhege" asked Purvi "but canon wasn't bad either"
"ha tum toh kahogi hi na" Daya said "tumhe Kavin aur Dushyant dono ke sath dance karne ko mila tha. And I know for that video you got more 1000 likes"
"eh your loss" Purvi shrugged
"kyu na mein koi aur sawal puchu" asked Popatlal nervously seeing the little banter
"haan barabar" Pankaj agreed
"aacha Purvi ji? Are you single"
"aye" Purvi said warningly
"I-I mean what about your love life" asked Popatlal hastily
"ye iski purani adaat hai" Tarika informed "Shreya bata rahi uske sath bhi flirt kar raha tha" as everyone turned to Daya, ready to restrain him if necessary
"aise kya dekh rahe ho" Daya shrugged "nahi maruga. Ab Siddharth ka headache kaun uski biwi ke sath flirt karta hai"
"shadi hui thi kya" asked Pankaj "I think sagai ke baad toh track end ho gaya tha na? Zarruri nahi na ki sagai ke baad shadi guaranteed ho"
"haan" Popatlal sobbed "meri do baar sagai tut gayi"
"poor guy" Purvi giggled
"waise aap kya karti hai apne free time mein" asked Popatlal
"wo selfie leti hai aur post karti hai" Pankaj butted before Purvi can answer
"oh I see" Popatlal nodded "aur aap Dr Tarika? I mean jab Abhijeet sir busy hote hai magar aap nahi"
"mere pass Porus me khud ka role hai" Tarika shrugged "I'm really busy"
"okay" Popatlal noted it down and got up "thank you really much. Isse mere kaam ho jayega"
"no thank you" said Pankaj "aacha khasa time pass ho gaya"
"oh BTW Daya sir" Popatlal called
"haan?"
"aap ke pass ek aur chance hai" Popatlal informed
"kya matlab" asked Daya confused
"Shreya 27 January ke episode me wapis aa rahi hai" Popatlal informed "aap ko nahi pata"
"what do you mean Shreya wapis aa rahi hai" Daya demanded "kisi ne mujhe kuch nahi bataya. Tumhe kaise pata"
"Purvi ma'am ne bataya" Popatlal pulled out his phone and showed Purvi's insta profile "pura preview hai. Aap Purvi ko follow nahi karte"
"what the hell! Chitrole ne mujhe nahi bataya" Daya growled at Popatlal "you know" he called out dangerously "if I've another chance, I could kill you for flirting with Shreya"
"bhaago" Popatlal ran off as Daya started chasing him
"Daya you can't attack a reporter" Abhijeet called as they ran after Daya and Popatlal.
And cut. I know this was stupid and boring but I wanted to write an interview of CID team by Popatlal. Eh anyways it's true. Shreya is returning for 20th anniversary of CID. I planned a walk down Memory Lane as a tribute but I'm too lazy to write it. But anyways, congratulations and thank you to B.P. Singh for making such a fabulous show and running it for 20 years and we hope even our children could see the series... meaning I wish it ran for another 20 years.
Thanks for reading guys.
CID Officer Yash Signing Off.