A/N: So this is something I wrote up for the one-year anniversary of our Tumblr marriage for my dearest waifu giupear on Tumblr! This is an AU that she came up with (and did unreleased sketches for ahhh), and I decided to write her a little something because it was incredibly adorable and I couldn't resist.
Giu, if you read this here, I love you so much and thank you so much for tolerating me for a whole year now! I hope we can stay close for much longer to come and that this piece is to your liking! Happy anniversary!
Everyone else, I hope you can forgive the cheese and enjoy!
With You Always
Once again, she found herself huddled beneath the branches of her tree.
A chill had begun to settle in as the sun set over the hills beyond the limits of the horizon. Its waning light doused the landscape in brilliant shades of orange and red, giving the scenery a picturesque and photogenic feel—almost as if she was living the climax of a drama film.
However, this breathtaking scenery only served to triple the ache weighing down on her heart.
She hardly shivered when a breeze gusted past her and disturbed the swaying leaves and petals above her head with an eerie howl. Much too late, she had realized the true extent of her loss—and here she sat against its sturdy trunk, stroking the thick roots as if rubbing a person's shoulders.
Time was almost up…
Mama! Mama, come here; look at this!
What is it, Lucy?
Look, look—it's this tiny tree! And it's got pretty flowers on it!
It certainly is beautiful, dear.
Mhm! Can we take it home? Pleaaaase? I promise to take really good care of it!
…O-oh…are you sure? The salesman says it's weaker than the others, and it seems much smaller than the rest of them…you don't want any of the bigger ones?
No, I want it to be this one! It's the prettiest one here!
Haha, well, all right; we can take it home. But you have to promise to take very good care of it, all right?
Yup! I pinkie promise!
It had been one of the happiest days of her life. That tiny cherry blossom sapling, dismissed by almost everyone due to its small size, weak stature, and late blooming, was now healthy and full-grown. As she'd promised her mother, she'd taken the utmost care to make sure it grew as healthy as possible. She would take her mother by the hand out into the garden almost every day, and she'd insist that her mother watched how well she took care of it.
As the years flew by, she'd found herself talking to the tree as she cared for it—it had practically become another member of her family. She would often walk out with her mother and sit outside in her garden with her and the newly planted tree, admiring its soft petals and glistening leaves in the brilliant rays of the summer sun and complimenting it on its beautiful dress.
She had even named the tree the day she'd planted it. She'd bestowed it with the name Natsu—a name that symbolized the summer season…because that was when its flowers bloomed with the most radiance. Her family never missed its blooming season.
Over the years, it had become a tradition. Not a summer went by without her family gathering together to watch their tree burst into bloom and fill their garden with color.
And yet…
Lucy, dear…I'm so sorry for the trouble I've caused you with this…
Mom, I promise; you were never any trouble at all…just please; focus on resting and recovering. It's almost summer, and Natsu will be blooming again soon. You—you don't want to miss that, right? So please…!
Oh…yes, of course…how could I have forgotten…please forgive your careless mother…!
No, please stop apologizing—you didn't do anything wrong; I'm not upset! Dad will be home tonight, so we can watch the blooming in the morning together. It'll be beautiful, just like—just like always—!
…You've…raised it well, dear…it's thanks to you that we can watch Natsu bloom in its namesake…thank you, my dearest Lucy. It's been…such a blessing…
Wh-why're you saying it like…th-this won't be the last time you'll be seeing the blooming; there will be so many more to see, Mom…Mom…?
She buried her face into her arms as she curled up into a ball, leaning heavily against the sturdy trunk of the tree. The breeze was picking up, making her hair and clothes fly about wildly in the wind.
She'd come here so many times ever since that day. She'd embraced the tree the day that she had passed, letting her tears stain its bark as she clung to the only memory of her mother that was left.
Naturally, people didn't bother to try to understand her behavior. They thought she was sick or insane.
Hey, I heard that girl talk to a tree yesterday! Can you believe it? Hahaha!
Haha, yeah; I heard she went insane after her mother died. Better avoid her.
Mommy, that pretty lady is crying and hugging a tree. Is she okay?
Don't stare at her, sweetie; it's not polite. Promise me you don't end up like her, okay?
Does that girl have no one else to talk to but that tree?
She probably doesn't have any actual friends to talk to. How sad is that?
Perhaps they were right…she did spend more time with Natsu than what would be considered healthy. People normally didn't talk to trees as if they were people. People normally didn't name them and treat them like a family member. People normally didn't go to sit under their trees in their gardens whenever they grieved.
Normal people didn't act like her. She wasn't "normal". Even her father had grown concerned.
But that had never stopped her. She wasn't insane. Trees were living beings, too. She believed that they harbored emotions as well. There may have been a chance that she'd speak with any friends about her grief—but they'd drifted away from her by this point. They'd gotten tired of hearing her talk about "that stupid tree" again and left her.
It probably would've hurt her—if, of course, they'd truly considered her a friend of theirs to start with—but since she'd been spending so much time with her tree anyway, that blow had been mitigated. It wouldn't give her any scathing looks or insensitive remarks like the people did—she could speak to Natsu all she wanted, and it would never interrupt her.
And she was sure that Natsu had been grieving for her mother's passing that day as well—because hardly minutes after she had passed, its flowers had bloomed and flourished like never before as Lucy ran into her garden. The winds had gusted through its branches, shaking the petals loose and letting them snow down onto the ground.
It had never been as resplendent before or since, and soon…it would never bloom again.
Natsu…you were sad that day, too…weren't you? Your flowers never looked as beautiful as they did the day she passed away…was that your way of sending her off?
…
I…I'm really going to miss her, Natsu…y-you're all I have left of her now, and I'm scared…what if something takes you away, too?
…
People think I'm crazy for talking to you, but they just don't know what you mean to me…they can't really help it, I guess. People don't normally talk to trees, y'know?
…
I don't know…maybe I really am crazy, talking to a tree…but I guess it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks…I mean, it's none of their business, right?
…
I just…I hope nothing happens to you. I'll keep you strong and healthy, okay? For both of your sakes…
Hardly a year later, however, she had seen how fate simply refused to be kind to her.
One morning, earlier during this summer, she'd gone out to visit Natsu again as she usually did before breakfast—and she'd found odd, discolored splotches on its bark. They'd been small in number but still noticeable enough to alarm her, so she'd called on their gardener to see what was wrong with it.
The news had been more than she could bear.
Miss Lucy…has this tree been sick before?
H-huh? What do you mean?
It's not often that trees contract this disease. The only way I could see this happening—particularly during the summer season—is if its immune system had been weakened before due to a previous infection.
W-well…the man I bought it from told me that this tree was weak to start with. D-does that have anything to do with it…?
It very well could, yes.
But—i-is there any way to help it? I can't lose this tree, no matter what! Tell me that there's a way…!
I…I'm sorry, Miss Lucy. There's no helping any plant that falls victim to this disease.
N-no—that can't be—!
Miss Lucy…how old is this tree?
O-oh, I…I'm not sure, but…I got this tree when it was a sapling. I've been raising it since I was eight years old; it's been over thirteen years…I can't just lose it like this…!
Is that so…it's amazing that it has managed to survive for so long. Weakened saplings usually don't last long once they sprout. It truly is a miracle.
Wh-what does that…?
…There isn't really any delicate way to put this, Miss Lucy, but…this tree should've died years ago. It probably won't last the rest of the summer.
She tried to swallow the lump that had unwittingly formed in her throat at the memory. The wind wouldn't let up, and she could finally feel the chill now, goosebumps now lining her arms—it was getting darker, as evidenced by the sun sinking farther over the horizon. She supposed that she should head inside since it was getting late, but she didn't want to leave the tree. She was terrified of the idea of her waking up the next morning to find that Natsu had died overnight.
"Um, excuse me…miss?"
A yelp of surprise escaped her as she felt her heart leap to her throat at the unexpected voice, and she quickly whirled around in an effort to locate her visitor—coming face-to-face with a young man she'd never seen before standing behind her, looking rather abashed.
"I—I'm sorry," he apologized as he retreated slightly in nervousness, the remorse clear in his tone. "I didn't mean to surprise you. I only wanted to ask what you were doing out so late, and I—"
She could hardly pay any attention to what the young man was saying. Having invaded her garden without notice notwithstanding, he had taken her so completely off-guard that she hadn't even noticed his approach until the moment he'd spoken up. It was a bit late to start paying attention to his words now, however, so she focused on assessing the newcomer instead.
She reasoned that he was pretty close to her age—perhaps somewhat older. He also seemed to be somewhat taller than her, with pale skin and a lean build. He had a short and messy mop of pink hair that was also flying about wildly in the wind and deep forest-green eyes laden with a clear panic. Even in spite of the strong wind and dropping temperatures, the fact that he was wearing nothing but a plain brown tee and khaki jeans didn't seem to bother him any, which was a surprise in retrospect—she half-expected him to keel over just from the force of the wind alone; he looked so frail.
"I-it's okay," she said at last, slowly rising to her feet and prompting him to pause. "I was just startled, is all…it's after hours, so our garden is closed at this time. I just wasn't expecting anyone to be here."
The young man looked even guiltier at her answer, if that was even possible. "O-oh…I—I didn't know that…I'm sorry."
"It's fine; really." She paused. "So…what brings you here at this time? I don't think I've seen you visit before."
"I…" He paused and drew in a deep breath before exhaling—possibly in relief, indicated by the small smile that graced his expression just then. "I'm…not a visitor."
She frowned. "You're not?
He sighed. "It's a little difficult to explain," he admitted, fixing his gaze onto the remnants of the sunset. "I just…really like it here."
She bit her lip. "But…you look like you're sick," she said worriedly, brushing her hair out of her face. "Should you really be up and about like this? Won't your family worry?"
His relieved smiled slowly melted into a wistful one at her queries, as if she had brought up some painful memories. "They worry all the time," he said quietly, gently placing a hand on the tree's discolored bark and turning his gaze to the soft pink petals swiftly snowing down from above. "And it's been hard…not being able to tell them that they shouldn't. I didn't have that long to begin with, but somehow…somehow, I made it this far." He chuckled once. "And I have them to thank for it. They were the best group of people I had the fortune to be taken in by, and the fact that I'll be leaving them soon in such a state of disrepair just…" His voice broke slightly as a streak of silver, glinting in the waning light, suddenly trailed down his cheek. His smile was still in place. "It just…makes me sad."
She couldn't completely make sense of what this young man was saying, but she could still clearly make out the heartbreak in his words. It was a pain that she was all-too familiar with—perhaps this was something her mother had experienced on the day she'd passed away…
"I…I'm sorry to hear that," she said softly. She wasn't sure if he was listening or not, but she plunged on. "A couple years ago, actually…my mom passed away. She was sick, just like you. She was sick; she was dying, but…all she would do was apologize to me, tell me how sorry she was that she had to leave. I'm still not sure why, to be honest, but…I bet you would've understood where she was coming from…better than I ever could." She drew in a shaky breath and stared down at her feet, pushing past the painful pressure in her throat—she was quickly losing her fortitude at the memory. "I couldn't even keep my promise to her…I promised that I'd take care of Natsu for her, but now…Natsu is dying, too…I…!" She quickly turned her back to him in an attempt to hide her face, not quite sure why she was even telling such a story to a stranger. "I feel like…such a failure…!"
Just then, a pair of strong arms wrapped around her and brought her close from behind, making her gasp lightly in surprise. This stranger—was he the one responsible? She could feel his hand lightly cradling her cheek, and she could feel the other stroking her head. His hold held much more strength than his frail stature betrayed. It was firm; it was secure…
It was warm.
Had this been anyone else, at any other time, she would've yelled at him and pushed him away for encroaching her space. No man, much less a stranger with any shred of decency, would make such a move on her so unexpectedly, and she was no doormat in any sense.
But.
She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but nothing about this embrace compelled her to make such a move. On the contrary, she was grateful for it. Firm yet relaxed, strong yet gentle…there was no other way she could've described the way this embrace felt.
It felt so safe.
She then tightly clung to the arm that was cradling her face, fighting to stop the streams of tears that threatened to run down to her chin. Perhaps she should have stopped to wonder why she felt so much at ease like this, but she didn't feel inclined—she feared that if she questioned it, the embrace would end, and she'd lose her security along with it.
"Lucy."
Her breath caught. He knew her name?
"You're not a failure," he said, his voice quiet and firm as his other hand briefly came to rest at the crown of her head. "You went above and beyond what was asked of you. I know that if your mother was here with you, she would still be proud of you…she'd never stop being proud, not now or ever. She…she's still proud of you."
She struggled to open her mouth and ask him what he meant, if only her voice would work—so many questions reigned in her mind now, but she couldn't ask them. His words had rendered her completely mute.
N-no way…how is it possible…could he be…?
"You shouldn't worry anymore," he went on, his voice breaking slightly. "You've done such an amazing job. So many people had lost all faith, but you—you had such an abundance of it. It amazes me, how much faith just one person can have…how much strength that faith brought forward…and how much that faith inspired me…!"
Even as the truth dawned on her, she struggled to come to terms with it. She shook her head—she wanted him to stop, to stop right there and explain himself, to explain what and how and why because it made no sense; it shouldn't have made sense, but even then…
Even then…he wouldn't stop...!
"The days I've spent here…they were the happiest of my life," he whispered. His voice was so much weaker now; she had to struggle to hear him over the howling of the wind around them. "It made me so happy to see you happy, and I knew I had to stay strong for you, just so that smile on your face would never ever disappear…" His voice turned hoarse. "But I couldn't do anything…I couldn't do anything when your mother passed away…I couldn't do anything when the inevitable caught up with me…I'd vowed to keep you happy, but I only ended up being the cause of your sadness…" He shifted his hands so that his arms were wrapped tightly around her torso now. "I…took your smiles away…I'm so sorry, Lucy…!"
The painful pressure in her throat, which had lessened before thanks to his embrace, returned with a vengeance. He sounded so broken—so broken and saddened and unbearably guilty that she could barely keep her own composure. She wanted to make this go away; she wanted to stop him and tell him that it was all okay and that he shouldn't feel any guilt at all; none of what had brought her to tears had been his fault in any way, but her voice simply refused to cooperate.
"There's…no way for me to make amends now," he murmured—she could tell that his voice had most definitely weakened. "Nothing I can do…nothing can make up for all the times you cried because of me…a legacy that constantly hurt you, but a treasure you could never afford to lose…all because I felt guilty for not being able to help you…the stress of that guilt brought that sickness to me, and now look…" He let out a shuddering breath. "Would you just look at me…at how pathetically selfish I am…!"
She wanted to scream at him in frustration—why was he beating himself up like this? Why was he blaming himself for making her cry? He had been the only solace she had had during her periods of grieving! He had never taken her smiles away—he had made her feel happier than anyone else ever could have! He had been her happiness!
But why…why couldn't she tell him so in order to make him stop? Why wouldn't her voice work?!
"I shouldn't have stayed in this world for this long," he choked out hoarsely—he was yet again on the verge of tears. "I should have left so long ago, but I wanted to see more of your smiles…I wanted to see more of your happiness…" He gulped down a sob. "But…it wasn't my place to decide that…if the world says I need to go…then I need to go…but…it did allow…one thing…"
His hold tightened around her. She couldn't breathe—but it wasn't due to his embrace.
"Before it took me away…it let me come to you…" She could feel his head resting heavily on her right shoulder. "It…it saw my guilt…and it at least let me come to you…before I…ran out of time…because I wanted to tell you…how sorry I am…and how…how grateful…I am…!"
She could feel her lip tremble and her eyes stinging at his words. Was that why she was unable to speak? Was it just letting him get everything out before his time was up? Would the world not allow for any interruptions…?
"There aren't enough thanks that I can give you…but I still…want to tell you…" The pressure on her shoulder slowly lightened before it vanished—and she felt his lips lightly peck her wind-bitten cheek.
She gasped. She found her voice again.
"You—N-Natsu—I—!"
"Thank you for taking me in and giving me a home," he said quietly, his voice hardly even a whisper. "Thank you for raising me when I had no one else…thank you for believing in me, when no one else would…thank you…!"
The pressure around her suddenly vanished, and she was suddenly free to move again. The sun was almost completely gone now, only a sliver of light betraying its remaining presence beyond the horizon. She quickly turned around to look at him…
But he was gone.
The wind slowly began to slow and die down…but not before it gusted through the now-bare branches of her tree as a final farewell.
Thank you so much for loving me…thank you…for letting me love you…
And we'll be with you…
...Always.
