This story was requested by Rena Reyuguu Witch of Happines. I wound up combining all your ideas into one story, hope you enjoy it.

Disclaimer: I do not, nor will I ever own Yu Yu Hakusho or anything affiliated with said show.

"Speaking"

'Thoughts'

Today was turning out to be one of the worst days ever and Hiei was quite certain that if things didn't turn around soon, he was going to end up killing himself…after destroying his so called 'friends' that is.

It all started at breakfast that morning when Hiei, feeling in a particularly good mood, decided to join Kurama for some sausage and eggs. The redhead loved to cook, and since his family was out of town for the next few weeks, informed Hiei that his kitchen was always open…and fully stocked with freshly made food.

Hiei had of course scoffed at his offer, refusing to eat human food, and disappeared into Makai. But for some strange reason he'd woken up that morning and figured a home cooked meal sounded good so he'd set off to visit the fox.

Unsurprisingly, he didn't stay very long. While the food was decent enough, he'd rather eat his own sword than admit he actually liked it, the conversation was not something he wanted to deal with that early in the morning…or ever for that matter.

The subject in question was, of course, Yukina. She'd been living with Genkai for a few years now, occasionally joining the Spirit Detectives on a mission, and leading an all around peaceful life. Exactly what he'd wished for her…though he still couldn't stand the fact that his twin sister had fallen for the 'idiot', but short of killing the guy there wasn't really anything he could do about that.

As a general rule Hiei actually rather enjoyed talking about Yukina, however, lately the group had begun pestering him about telling her exactly who he was. In the beginning, back when only a few of them knew, it was fine they kept telling him, but now that everyone knows, save Yukina herself, they feel it's stupid to keep up the lie. Even Kuwabara's been bothering him about it…although that didn't start until recently since it took him awhile to get over his initial shock and all. Hiei had never seen a human go as pale as Kuwabara did on that day, he looked as white as a ghost…which is probably what he thought he was about to become.

Anyway, after ditching Kurama Hiei just happened to run into…you guessed it, Yusuke. Apparently the delinquent was on his way to meet Keiko at the movies and decided to say hi to Kurama since it was on the way. Hoping to get away without being forced to talk, Hiei made up some excuse about seeing Koenma about a mission and began heading in the opposite direction…it didn't work.

Yusuke decided that helping out a friend was more important than some silly chick flick and followed after Hiei, figuring two fighters would make the job go by a lot faster. This of course meant that Hiei now had to explain that there wasn't really a mission, which lead to even more talking and of course the inevitable 'so when are you going to tell her' line.

Thoroughly annoyed by now, Hiei ditched the detective before he could say another word and was on his way to Makai, lest he end up having to deal with yet another teammate, when lo and behold who does he run into but none other than Kuwabara himself. If it wasn't for Yukina being attached to his arm, Hiei probably would've struck the moron down all the while laughing maniacally. Instead he forced himself to listen to her recount their latest date…the things he did for his sister.

If that wasn't bad enough, Kuwabara stood there the entire time mouthing things like 'tell her', 'you know you want to', and 'should I leave you two alone for a few minutes so you can talk'. It took all of Hiei's willpower to not strangle him with his bare hands.

Thankfully a few minutes later Yukina remembered something she had to do and proceeded to drag Kuwabara off with her. Just in time too, any longer and Hiei probably really would've killed him, consequences be damned.

Now that he'd had to deal with every member of their little group, Hiei was more than ready to head back to Makai and stay there for the rest of the day…or week…or month depending on how he felt after a nice long demon hunt.

Of course just as he was about to take off, Botan stuck her head through a portal and demanded he follow her. Koenma had a mission for him…go figure. He thought about telling her to get lost, but decided against it, she'd drag him there regardless anyway. Besides, maybe he'd get some really challenging mission with lots of high level demons to fight.

And that's how Hiei found himself standing before the toddler listening to him ramble on and on about some new artifact in Makai that needed to be found and blah, blah, blah. He'd heard it all before and couldn't care less what Koenma was going on about. All he wanted was to fight. If he managed to bring back the box thingy the toddler wanted, so be it, but it wasn't exactly high on his list of priorities right then.

Once Koenma finally stopped blabbing, Botan opened a portal and Hiei was finally back in Makai, where he was free to hunt and kill any demon that crossed his path. Or at least he would've been able to if there had been any demons around. It turned out the area where the object was located was completely void of all living creatures, demon or otherwise.

"You've got to be kidding me." Hiei growled in annoyance, eyes wandering over the dust covered floors and barren rooms. "I come all the way to Makai to vent and there's not a single demon around. Great, could this day get any worse." Kicking a rotten piece of wood, he watched in satisfaction as it shattered against the opposite wall.

Figuring he may as well grab the item the toddler was looking for, Hiei walked back through the old rundown buildings searching for the small wooden box, at least he thought it was wooden, he hadn't really paid much attention to the photo Koenma had shown him.

He found the box in the third room he entered, sitting in the middle of the floor without a single speck of dust anywhere on it. Ignoring the strange vibe he got from being near it, Hiei grabbed the box off the ground at the same time he pulled his communicator from his pocket. Flipping open the compact, he waited for Botan to answer so he could finish this pointless mission and finally be able to go hunting.

In his haste to get back, Hiei accidentally knocked the lid of the box ajar and a strange white powder exploded out, covering him from head to toe. With a cough he dropped the box to the floor and started wiping the stuff off his face. Wincing as the powder got into his eye, he rubbed them gently as a soft female voice came over the line.

"Hiei, is that you?" Botan asked as the communicator blinked to life. "Have you completed the mission?"

Unable to see very well, Hiei fumbled around for the small device. "Yeah, I've got the stupid box so get me out of here." He said, pausing when the sound of his voice registered in his ears. 'That powder must have really messed with my throat.' He thought absently, still scrubbing at his eyes with one hand while his other held up the communicator.

"…um who are you?" Botan asked, her tone gentle as if she were speaking to a child.

"Stop playing dumb and get me out of this crappy place." Hiei snapped back, he wasn't in the mood for games.

"I'm sorry little one, but I think you must be confused." Botan replied after a moment of silence. "Now, would you mind telling me if there's a short, black haired demon there with an attitude. This device belongs to him and I really need to speak with him."

Hiei growled and gave the tiny image a glare. "I am Hiei and you damn well know it you insufferable woman! Now stop this nonsense and come get me."

Botan's eyes widened in shock as she stared at the screen in her hand. "But that's not possible." She murmured. "You don't look…" Shaking her head, she opened the portal without finishing her thought and stepped through into the dark room.

"It's about time woman." Hiei said in annoyance, closing the communicator with a snap and shoving it inside his pocket. "Here's the stupid box. I'm going home." Turning to toss it at the bubbly grim reaper, he froze when he came face to face with her knees. 'What the hell?' He thought. 'When did she get so tall?' Stepping back, he looked up into her eyes and frowned. "Okay, what the hell's going on here?"

Now that she was closer, Botan could see the full extent of what had happened and she couldn't help the giggles that slipped from her mouth as she stared down at the demon. "You are absolutely adorable!" She squealed when Hiei's eyes narrowed, and without thinking she dropped to her knees and pulled him into a hug. "And your hair looks so cute like that!"

Completely confused and bordering on homicidal by now, Hiei pushed her away harshly. "What is your problem?"

Rubbing the back of her head, Botan grinned sheepishly before sticking her hands under her legs to prevent herself from doing something stupid, like squeezing him in her arms, again. "I'm sorry, I just couldn't resist."

Taking a deep breath, killing Botan would definitely not win him any points with Koenma…and he needed her to get him out of there, Hiei ran a hand over his face before trying once again. "Explain yourself…now."

"…um…I think it would be easier if I showed you." Botan said finally, reaching into her kimono and pulling out a small compact mirror. Holding it up, she cringed in anticipation of what was to come.

"Showed me wh-…" Hiei trailed off as he looked at his reflection. The face staring back at him was not his own. His hair was still black, but instead of standing in its typical spiky fashion, it fell in waves over his shoulder and reached almost halfway down his back, and his eyes looked rather girly with their long dark lashes. Dropping the mirror in shock, he scrambled backwards trying to get as far away from the image as possible, but wound up tripping over his clothes that were now far too big on him. "What's happened to me?"

Botan didn't know if he expected a response, but she gave one anyway. "Well it looks to me like you were changed into a little girl." She said cheerfully. "…and an adorable one at that. I bet you'd look so cute in a pretty pink dress with frilly lace."

That was the last straw. Hiei's day already sucked and now he'd been turned into a young girl…yeah, someone was going to die. Jumping up, he leapt at Botan, intent on ripping her head from her body, or other such bodily harm. He never got the chance. Botan's oar had come out of nowhere and one hard hit had him face down on the ground unconscious.

Dropping her oar, Botan shook her head. "I can't believe I just hit a child!" She cried, covering her face with her hands. "I mean sure it's Hiei, but he's a child now, I shouldn't have been so mean." Hiei began muttering threats in his sleep and she rolled her eyes. "I take it back, the twerp deserved it. Now, to get him back to Koenma so we can figure out how to deal with this mess."

Wrapping the small body in her arms, he was always on the short side, but now he was barely more than two feet tall, Botan carried him back through the portal and into Koenma's office. "KOENMA!" She shouted. "Get in here, we've got a problem!"