One day. One full day of surviving in a very hot forest. One day of nonstop headache. One day of pain and irritation, but I am alive. Earlier this day, I had awoken in a forest with little memory of who I am. I know my name is Gaardynia, I know I am a nation, I know that I am much older than my current body, and I know that I died.

When I awoke earlier, I was surprised by the size of the trees, the size of my new body, and my voice. Needless to say, upon realizing that I was reborn into a child's body, I had unleashed my entire vocal range of curses. What's more, I was wearing rags which could barely be considered clothing.

I had spent the day wandering aimlessly and subconsciously sharpening a stick, until I found a suitable tree to stay for the night. And so I find my story beginning.

'Who am I really? I know my name, but what about anything else?' I held my head as a sudden headache nearly knocked me off of my branch. I was going to curse my luck, when I heard some footsteps coming closer. Thinking it was some animal, I held on tighter to my stick and prepared to jump; and when I heard it right under me, I did.

And then it caught me. I found myself struggling to get free of the grasp of whatever is holding me. "What do we have here?" It asked. I stopped my struggling to look at it.

I found myself looking at a person.

He had pale skin, strawberry blond hair, a pair of small fangs barely poking out of his mouth, and red eyes. From my distance away from the ground, I concluded that he must be at least 5'7". He wore a red woolen overcoat, dark breeches, tall black-laced boots, and a small bowler hat with ribbons attached to it.

I saw him look me over; my cultural sensitivity causing me to realize how little I was wearing, and blushed. Eventually, his gaze settled on my eyes, and I saw him flinch. My eyes were no different than my people; completely black, with a small glowing blue pupil in the middle. I thought he would release me.

I was wrong.

Instead of doing what I thought he would do, he instead smirked; and I suddenly fully realized my situation, and re-began struggling to get free. Alas, it was not to be, as his grip held firm; and despite my hits, he seemed unphased. "I know what you are, you're a micronation!" My irritation at my current predicament overrode my indignation of being called such a thing. Unfortunately, before I could retort, he slung me under his arm as he yelled again. "Conquest!" And he began to walk away with me in tow.

Eventually, I gave up and just slumped, opting to instead save my energy to escape. We eventually made it to some house, not that it mattered, but it was big. It might have bannisters to slide down! I quickly shook that idea out of my head, not even bothering to think of where it came from.

The pale man dropped me once we were both inside. He may have put me down, but he still kept a grip on me as he led me to sit on a couch next to him. "Alright, I'm your new caretaker, Romania. You can call me big brother!" I just stared at him, wondering if he was serious.

"No." I saw his eye twitch.

"Call me big brother." He said more forcefully this time.

"No."

"Call me Papa?" I resisted the urge to slam my face on the desk.

"No."

"Call me something."

"What do you want from me, closet pervert?" He did a double take.

"Just call me big brother, it is very simple, just two words." I narrowed my eyes, indicating that I was not amused.

"No." I replied with slightly more emphases.

"Well, at least I tried." He said dismissively. It felt like I wasted thirty seconds. "So, what's your name, little one?" I stared at him for a little while, decide whether or not to give him my name.

"Gaardynia. Now what do you want with me?"

"Well, isn't it obvious? I just conquered you!" He said with an overly comical smile. It was so cheesy, that I wasn't sure if it was real or not.

"No, you didn't. I don't have anything, ergo you can't conquer-" I then fully realized my current position and scrambled away to the far wall. "By Cho'hole no! Spirits get this crazy bastard away from me!"

"Oh, no little one, I would never- oh wait, you're right. Come here and sit on my lap." He said while patting his legs. I responded… by lobbing a chair at him. He simply caught it and set it back down as if it happened every day. "You done yet?"

"So long as you stay over there, I might choose not to stab you in the eye with a rusty fork." He got up, and I took a step back.

"Come here, I won't hurt you, probably." He said as he bent over with his arms outstretched.

"Piss off, closet pervert!" Romania just kept coming forward, catching everything I threw at him, and setting them down. Eventually, I chose to risk it, for the proverbial biscuit; and dashed through the only open place, between his legs.

Unfortunately, he caught me by the back of the wannabe potato sack called clothes that I am currently wearing. From which, I now find myself hanging with more than half of my body hanging out in the open. I was now completely flailing around, my face redder than the actual color, and my incessant yelling and cursing did nothing to stifle the laughter coming from the sadistic bastard above me. "Oh no, it's dark, you're not going out there." He said while not even trying to control his laughter.

"Put me down, closet pervert! I will tear your tongue from your mouth and feed it to you Baiso Nerrakc!" I yelled, temporarily forgetting that gravity existed. He had then carried me up the stairs into a bedroom. At this point, I had completely reverted into Gaardynian speech out of fear and anger. "YYu keetar a nerrakc! Uhn'hun'ad mheh, aie noo'th ssu'um duh'ohll tuho puh'lae wis!" He just completely ignored me and tucked me into the bed. If anything, he knew how to make it so I couldn't move. It was so soft and warm, safe even. I shook that thought out of my head with the promise that I would figure out where it came from in the morning.