Author's Note: So, I'm back. My semester just ended yesterday and now I'm on summer break. Yay! I feel like I'm a bit rusty because I haven't watched Disney Channel in general for months, but eh, I gave it my best shot. This is probably the closest I will ever come to writing a Sawni story. When I was inspired by the song, I couldn't really figure out any way around making it, partially/implied, either girl-on-girl or guy-on-guy. I decided on Tawni and Sonny because the song is meant to be girl-on-girl romance. Although when I say "girl-on-girl," I mean that in very loose terms. It's most implications, nothing explicit. Plus, there's sorta, kinda Channy to balance it out, so I guess it all works out in the long run.
Anyway, please enjoy. :)
Disclaimer: I do not own Sonny With a Chance or the song "I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend to Dance With You" by Black Kids.
"The word's on the street and it's on the news
I'm not gonna teach him how to dance with you"
-"I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You" by Black Kids
"So, I was just wondering," Sonny's voice announced her presence before her entire figure came into view before Tawni.
"Yes?" Tawni responded; annoyed by Sonny's assumption that she would automatically drop every important thing she was doing to attend to her silly needs. Such as right now. She was only trying to fill her lunch tray with a nutritious meal, but along came Sonny to Sonny things up.
"Well, you see," Sonny blushed, biting her lip, obliviously embarrassed by whatever it was she wanted to ask.
"Say it, Sonny! You're severely cutting into Tawni Time," Tawni pushed her friend gently with her forearm as a way to signify for her to move out of her way. Sonny was currently blocking the low fat yogurt she was desperately trying to reach. If she didn't keep this "fabulous figure" looking fabulous because Sonny wouldn't budge, it wasn't going to be pretty.
"Sorry," the actress replied quickly, attempting to avoid the rage brewing in Tawni. "But I was just going to ask if you could – umm – teach Chad –"
"Teach Chad what?" Tawni almost dropped her tray at her friend's words. "To read? Simply addition? Who do you think I am? A lonely, cat obsessed teacher?" She could feel herself slowly becoming more and more insulted at the though.
"What was that, Tawni?" Ms. Bitterman's voice shot across the cafeteria, setting her newspaper aside as she spoke.
Tawni's gapped for a moment before calling forth her acting abilities and thinking on her feet.
"Nothing, Ms. Bitterman." She grabbed a roll from the basket next to her and shoved it into Sonny's mouth. "I was just telling Sonny, here, that if she doesn't eat this roll soon, it will become lonely…" Tawni made a face as she finished her statement, which she swiftly morphed into a smile.
Ms. Bitterman raised an eyebrow, but returned to her newspaper.
Sonny sputtered out the remnants of bread out of her mouth and coughed, wiping at her lips with the back of her hand.
"What was that for?" Sonny forcefully questioned. "Couldn't you have shoved the roll down your own throat?"
"And risk eating all those carbs!" Tawni exclaimed, wide-eyed. "Sonny, you obliviously don't ascribe to the patented Tawni Hart diet, which specifically states: No carb is a good carb. That cheese diet is going straight to your head if you think I'm going to risk this figure for a roll."
Sonny shook her head, ignoring her last comment. "Could you please just do me the favor and teach Chad how to dance?"
"To dance?" Tawni almost laughed, but she managed to contain the feeling. "Didn't he dance with you at secret prom?"
Sonny sighed, "Yeah, but it was awkward – kinda." She took a breath and released it. "I really want him to be comfortable with dancing with me for my cousin's wedding."
"Wouldn't it make more sense for him to practice dancing with you, since you'll be the one actually dancing with him?" Tawni managed at this point to move Sonny out of the way and retrieve the yogurt she was craving.
She blushed, giggling quietly. "He told me, he doesn't want to accidently stomp on my toes, so finding an alternative until he's a – quote, unquote – "flawless" dancer is our only option."
Tawni scrunched her face. "That's both sweet and nauseating."
"So you'll do it?" Sonny beamed at her friend with a twinkle of hope sparkling in her eyes.
Tawni tried to ignore the twinkle dancing there in her eyes, but it was difficult to avoid when they standing so close, staring into one another's eyes. She could feel a warmth creeping onto her cheeks as she watched closely the eyes of girl in front of her. Chad wasn't anywhere good enough for her. Why she spent so much time trying to whip him into shape was beyond her. That jerk was hardly worth it.
"Fine," she begrudgingly agreed to her friend's request.
Sonny smiled, turning her attention away from Tawni. Tawni rolled her eyes as soon as she wasn't looking. How in the world did she end up agreeing to allow Chip Drama Pants to stomp mercilessly across her toes? If only she could have gorged out those brown, hypnotizing eyes.
An hour later, Tawni stood with her arms tightly crossed over her chest waiting impatiently for the self-proclaimed "King of Drama" to arrive. The multitude of thoughts relating to how she ended up standing there waiting for him to come step on her feet hadn't ceased; in all actuality the number was increasing with every moment.
At that moment, the door to the girl's dressing room flung open and the one and only Chad Dylan Cooper appeared in the threshold. He positioned himself so that his elbow was stabilizing him against the doorframe as he stood and partially modeled in front of Tawni.
"Don't worry, Random," Chad held his hand up in a sign of relief. "Chad Dylan Cooper hasn't forgotten you."
She huffed out a frustrated burst of air.
"I don't care what Sonny says, you're total jerk through and through." Tawni lifted a magazine off her vanity and threw it at him.
He dodged it, swinging his hands as if he were a ninja master of some sort. Tawni rolled her eyes at his motions and tapped her foot impatiently on the floor as a signal for him to come into the room so they could begin.
"Hold your horses," Chad replied, as he walked into the room. "I'll get there when I get there. No rushing."
"I can rush you as much as I like." Tawni pointed toward herself. "I am the one teaching you to dance here, so be grateful or I might have to kick your butt." She threatened.
"Oh fine." He strolled his way further into the dressing room, opening up his arms. "So, do I have grab a hold of you or are you going to come onto me like we both know you want to."
"If you're flirting with me right now, I'm really going to have to kick your butt, for not only flirting with me, but also willingly cheating on Sonny." Tawni grasped another one of her multiple magazines sprawled across her vanity and held it up threatening.
Tawni continued, "Nobody, and I mean nobody, gets to cause her that amount of emotional stress except me." She shook the periodical towards him, imitating the swing she was about to take should he fall out of line.
Chad put up his hands, surrendering to her will. "Hey, hey, hey, no need to get all feisty, Blondie. I would never cheat on Sonny with the likes of you. Why would I want to degrade my status with a Random even further down the loser list?"
Something within Tawni snapped then. Nobody called, and/or implied, Tawni Hart was a loser.
With a swipe of her arm, she knocked Chad to the ground with the magazine clenched in her grasp. He toppled backwards into her closet and was swallowed whole by the mass of designer clothes she wore in intervals on So Random!.
Glaring at where Chad had just fallen, Tawni tossed her magazine to the side of her vanity and fled the room. She needed to tell Sonny she couldn't teach Chad to dance with her.
Sonny was too good for him anyway…
Though Sonny wasn't too good for her.
"He doesn't suspect a thing. I wish he'd get a clue
I'm not gonna teach him how to dance"
Author's Note: Yeah, I'm rusty. I need to get back into the swing of things before I pick up the stories I've left hanging for a long time.