Super Period

Robin paced agitatedly around the Titan's living room, muttering loudly to himself about catching Slade. Raven, nearby, couldn't help but overhear. Earlier that day, the Titans had been fighting their arch-nemesis. Just as Raven was about to blast him with several rock shards broken off with her mysterious psychic power, Robin had pushed her aside so he, the hero, could once again attempt to go up against Slade, and once again, lose and allow him to get away.

Considering the circumstances, it was no wonder that Raven got agitated. She angrily put down the book that she had been reading and stalked over to the Boy Wonder. "Robin, stop that this instant!" Raven snapped as she tapped him forcefully on the shoulder to make him turn around. "I can't stand listening to the same rant every single time that Slade gets away," Raven said in a voice much more clipped that her normal cold monotone.

"Wha…what?" Robin stuttered, shocked that his teammate would say such a thing to him, Robin, the team leader, one-time protégé of the legendary Batman.

"I'm tired of it Robin. I'm tired of you always needing to be the one to fight Slade. I wouldn't mind if you succeeded, but no. Every single time he manages to slip away into the darkness. And every single time you try to follow, lose him in the dark, then spend days brooding about the loss. Any of the other Titans, the ones with superpowers could have seen and stopped him, but no, oh no, it must be Robin that saves the day," Raven said scornfully as her body was surrounded by a mysterious black energy, causing her to float.

"Yes Robin, that's right," Raven continued after seeing the horrified look on Robin's face as she mentioned his lack of superpowers and Slade getting away. "Each time, after you and your metal-toed, stick-wielding ass lost to Slade, I tried to go after him, but no, 'just let him go,'" she finished with a cruelly accurate imitation of Robin's defeated tone. In the background, things began to glow with an eerie aura and started to float.

"Just calm down Raven, your powers are getting the better of you," Robin said slowly, obviously thinking about what Raven had said.

"Well, at least I have super powers to get out of control. Unlike someone here," she snarled with a condescending look at Robin. At that inopportune moment, the other three Titans walked in, stunned at the sight of an incredibly pissed off Raven yelling at Robin. "Look," Raven gestured at the other three teens, "Star has glowing green bolts of doom, Beast Boy can change into any animal, Cyborg has inhuman strength, but what do you have? A metal stick and a fetish for monologues. Yet, somehow, you're the team captain, the one who thinks that he should beat Slade, then has the nerve to tell other, much more qualified people to back down! " Raven shouted at Robin as more objects became engulfed in the black light of Raven's mysterious powers.

"I…I…" Robin started with his characteristic "monologue music" beginning to play in the background. "Yes, Robin, monologue. Monologue for all your worth because it's not as if you can do anything else right. Look, I'm amazed that you can even pick up your stick with your astounding lack of any muscle. Cy, look! Hell, I have more muscle than he does, and my power doesn't even require them.

Cyborg, conflicted with loyalty to his team captain and an incredibly vexed Raven with a few good points eventually decided to side with Raven. "Well Robin, a few more hours in the sim' really couldn't hurt," he said delicately, trying not to further wound Robin's pride.

"I…I…" Robin stuttered with his monologue music. "Hush now, everyone hush," Raven barked sarcastically, "Bird-boy is about to monologue," she said in a loud whisper as she pretended to look enthralled for a moment before miming retching behind the couch.

"I can't believe that Raven really feels that way about me. I thought that we were friends. I mean, I knew she could be cold at times, but this is ridiculous! Hmm, I wonder if this cape makes my butt look big…" Robin petered off in time to his music.

"Oh, really clever, Robin, but that was most definitely supposed to be a soliloquy. Soliloquy, damn it. Especially the comment about your ass. The cape doesn't make your butt look big, your ass fat does. Now, if we are quite finished to listening to the 'Boy Wonder' as he calls himself, I'm going to bed where I can't be bothered by any more of this Monologue business, or whether a person with any discernable power or cunning should lead instead of a delusional boy with a cape, a stick, and metal toed corrective shoes that once lived with a creepy old guy in a cave. Good night," the irate sorceress barked at she billowed into her chambers, windows shattering behind her.

Robin, left behind and nearly in tears turned to his best friend and secret crush, Starfire. "Star, am I really that pathetic? Should I just leave? What did I do to piss Raven off so much?" the 'Boy Wonder' choked out.

"Oh no, friend Robin! You are not weak at all! You see, every ten years for about ten days, every female from the planet Azarath goes through her menstrual cycle. Some side affects are surges of power, irritability, cravings, and occasionally mild skin rashes," Star said in a comforting tone. Beast boy, in a wondering tone said, "So, she has like, super period? Whoa!"

"Yes Beast Boy, whoa indeed," Cyborg said sagely as he went into the kitchen to find a broom to sweep up the shards of broken glass that were once clean, sparkling windows.

Robin, after a moment of thought walked off to his room to contemplate monologues vs. soliloquies, Raven's rant about his inadequacies, and the dangers of a 'super period'.