A/N: First Psych fic so please forgive my mistakes. Dont own Psych but I want Shawn lol. This is all on Juliet's P.O.V. I'm planning on continueuing this.. Although this could also be just a one shot. Tell me what you think. :]

I stare at the hallway of the SBPD, waiting for a certain 'psychic' detective to waltz around and brighten up our boring day. It has been a year since he has left. It has been one year, one month and three days since he proposed. It has also been one year, one month and three days since I rejected him.

Evereything was perfect in our relationship. We work well on cases together. We are professional when at work. We do flirt and he manages to steal kisses in between, but other that, all is well. After work, we spend the night either watching 80s movies with Gus, dinner dates at a nice restaurant [or with his father at his house] or making out anywhere in my or his apartment. We talk about some serious stuffs, but we also talk about fun and sweet stuffs. He even told me that he wasn't a psychic, and I accepted his explanation, knowing that he had no choice at the time and his intentions are good. I love him so much and he lets me know that he loves me too. Everything was just perfect. So why the hell did he needed to propose? Or why the hell did I have to say no.

That night was perfect. He brought me to psych. He prepared a dinner date, like the ones he prepared when I had to go undercover as a Derby skater. Then we held hand as we strolled at the beach. As we reach the shore, we started close-talking. He told me how much he love me. He went down on knees after that and asked me to marry him. You know what happened next. I said no.

To be honest, I'm not really sure why I said no. It's not that I don't want to spend the rest of my life with him. It's also not because I don't think he is capable of having a family. In fact, I think he would be a good husband and a good father to our future little Shawns and little Juliets. Yes, I know. I have been dreaming of having a family with him ever since he "proposed" to me for our undercover work. So why did I have to reject him?

I guess, its because I got scared. I was scared that if we get married, we might mess it up. I was scared that because of the danger of our jobs that one of us might leave the other. I was scared that maybe he was just making a mistake. That he might find another girl that would much better than me. I'm scared that our love wouldn't be enough to make us forever. Damn these doubts and insecurities!

I never thought that would end our relationship. In all fairness to him, he did try to make things normal again. We went back to our old routine like nothing happened. He never mentioned the proposal again, not until I had to bump with Declan and had coffee with him. It was supposed to be a friendly catch up. But why did Shawn had to show up at the same diner as we are? I wished at that time that he was really a psychic, so he wouldn't misunderstood everything.

I never seen him so jealous, so furious and so hurt. How long was he hiding those emotions? I do not know. I guess, he was going to blow up sooner or eventually. He just needed a trigger. We fought that night. We yelled at each other, threw and broke things. I shouldn't have fought him. I shouldn't have told him that I didn't want to marry him because he's immature, irresponsible and selfish. But I did not mean what I said. He's may be immature, but I love his playfulness and humor, most especially when we're in bed. *wink* He's not irresponsible too. He has been solving numerous of cases for the Santa Barbara Police Department, and he makes sure that nothing would be left unsolved. And he is definitely not selfish, in fact he is the opposite of selfish. He had love me with all of his heart. He may not listen to me at times, but his intentions are usually good. He puts the people he loves first before himself, and that makes him noble. I know I shouldn't have told him those things and I was just really mad that he didn't trust me enough. But I couldn't blame him. I knew I hurt him enough when I said no to that stupid proposal.

He left town without saying goodbye. He told Gus he needed time to think and clear his head. I tried looking for him a couple of times. But Henry said, its no use. If he did not want to be found, no one can find him.

I wonder how would our life turn out, if I just said yes. I wonder if we're already married by now. I bet he would be very dapper on our wedding day. And I, I would be the most beautiful woman that day. I know both my father would be there and walk me down the aisle, because Shawn would do everything just to make sure that Frank would show up. He loves me that much. We will both have misty eyes during the ceremony, but Shawn would make sure that we'll have a good laugh too.

The whole SBPD would be there to congratulate us. Even Carlton would be happy for us. Of course, Gus would be his best man and he will give us a heart felt toast then he'll pretend that he's mad because Shawn would steal his credit card for our honeymoon. I will dance with him all night, with occassional taps from the other men who wants to dance with me like Henry. He'll warn me about his son then he'll welcome me to their family.

After our party, we'll go back to our room and he'll carry me until we reach our bed. We'll make passionate love all night like we never did before. And when we get really get tired, he'll kiss me goodnight, then I'll cuddle deeper into him.

I wonder what else would happen if I just said yes to him. What would be his reaction when I told him he's going to be a father for the first time? What would our children look like? I bet he'll be a wanna be cool dad too. He'll be running around with them. I would be stuck disciplining him and our kids. But he'll sure that our kids would grow up good kids. I know that for sure.

But that could never happen now, because I was stupid. Shawn is gone and it's all because of me. I wonder where he is right now. What is he doing right now? Is he day dreaming the what-ifs too? Is he even thinking about me? When will he back? There's so much more questions about Shawn running into my mind right now. I just can't help it. Oh Shawn! I miss you so much.

"O'Hara! Go home. It has been a long day." an authorative but comforting voice broke my thoughts. It was the Chief. I smiled and nodded.

I looked at Carlton, who had a sympathetic glance on his face. Henry too had the similar look and so as Gus who is seated in front of Henry's table. He go here a lot even if Shawn's gone. Henry and Gus spend time together, so they could share stories about Shawn so they wouldn't miss him so much. I join them whenever I'm not too busy with work. Even Lassiter, Buzz and the Chief share stories about Shawn sometimes. I looked down at the paperwork that I've been working and saw that it has been wet. Oh. I've been crying.

I guess I've been crying hard again. How could I not? I've been missing him. My Shawn. My supposedly fiancé. I've been crying everyday, mostly during the night, since he left. I made the biggest mistake in my life, and it cost me of losing the best thing that happened in my life. Please come home, Shawn. I want to fix my mistakes. I want to live my dream this time. I love you so much and I hope you give me another chance to make it up to you...

A/N: So, one shot or continue with Shawn coming back? Pls review! Thank you!