Hey! So this is my first attempt of writing a Kabby fic! The moment i watched the promo for 3x09 I started imagining how THE scene might go, and since we had a 3 week hiatus for some weird, stupid reason I mean, it's not Christmas! There's not even a holiday, (that I'm aware of, at least), except for the Jewish Purim, but that only lasts a few days so it's NO excuse! I had time to actually write it instead of leaving it in my head. I got a bit of writer's block in the middle and then I had the flu all of the past week so I wasn't able to finish it beforehand, but I decided that I was determined to post this before the episode aired and I did it! A few hours before it airs, true, but it's still counts :P
If you actually read all of that ramble I aploud you. lol. Now, without further ado...
DISCLAIMER: I do not own The 100 nor it's characters and plotlines. Duh.
Abby had been trapped in the medical ward for hours. Pike's new policy had caused lots of injuries amongst the people of Arcadia. He had many of them learning how to fight, but was extremely harsh in his lessons. This caused almost a medical overload, and some of her best surgeons were for some reason unavailable to help. Courtesy of Pike, she guessed. He wanted her out of the way and he probably figured that this was the best way to keep her busy with something else. Unfortunately, he was right. Abby could never rest when her patients needed her.
It was Bellamy, oddly enough; who told her what happened to Marcus. How Marcus had, with the help of Sinclair and Lincoln, kidnapped Pike and attempted to deliver him to the Grounder army that had surrounded them a few hours earlier.
However, attempted was the operative word. Marcus had been unsuccessful. Bellamy tentatively - as if fearing her reaction - told her that Marcus had been arrested for treason and was soon to be executed, to be set as an example for any others who thought of opposing Pike and his tyranny. Bellamy had been apologetic and Abby subconsciously registered that he was sincere when he said that he never wanted this to happen, but she couldn't bring herself to care about that.
The moment Bellamy told her Marcus's fate, Abby felt her heart stop. Her throat closed up, not allowing her to breath. Her blood turned to ice and suddenly she was freezing, despite it being a rather warm day. Had her brain been working, she would have recognized the symptoms of shock, but as it was, her mind was numb. Her heart was overwhelmed with grief. There was only one thought running through her head.
No, not Marcus, not again.
Abby faintly registered Bellamy's worried voice in the background, repeatedly saying her name. She suddenly realized that she was braced against the table, her arms being the only thing holding her up and stopping her from falling to the floor. She felt a hand on her arm, and looked up to see Bellamy's concerned face. He opened his mouth to say something but she cut him off before he could get the chance.
"I want to see him," she said with a harsh whisper.
"I can't... Pike won't let-" Abby sent him a glare and Bellamy faltered. "I'll see what I can do."
As Bellamy left, Abby focused on leveling her breathing. She couldn't lose Marcus. Not now, not ever. And she couldn't go through this again. She wouldn't, she couldn't for the second time lose a man she cared for. A man she lo-
A sob escaped her, wracking her body.
If losing Jake had almost shattered her, she knew that losing Marcus would irrevocably break her.
A few hours later, (or maybe it had been just mere minutes, Abby had lost track of time), Bellamy returned. Wordlessly, he told her to follow him to where Marcus undoubtedly was. To Abby's surprise, he didn't lead her to the prison. Instead, he took her to a different room. There were two guards standing outside the door, along with Pike. Abby felt her blood boil angrily at the sight of him. This was HIS fault. All of it. The entire situation they were in was because of him. Abby didn't think she'd ever hated anyone as much as she hated Pike, (except for perhaps herself during the year after Jake was floated).
Abby tried to muster up a glare for Pike, like she had at Bellamy, but the visible tears in her eyes and puffy red face ruined the effect. To her distain, she saw pity in Pike's eyes. She could only imagine how the state she was in affected her outer appearance. She probably looked a mess; she sure felt like one. But she didn't want Pike's pity. She wanted him to be angry with her and fuel her own anger at him. Anger was easier to deal with than this nerve-shattering sense of grief.
"You have 5 minutes," Pike told her.
She wanted to hit him, she wanted to scream, but then the door opened and oh god there was Marcus.
Abby stepped into the room. Behind her the doors closed, giving them the illusion of privacy although Abby had no doubt there were camera's recording their every move.
"Marcus," she whispered, her voice breaking. Her eyes drunk him in, memorising every inch of him.
Marcus, who had been looking down when she came in, lifted his head at the sound if her voice.
"Abby," he breathed, as if her name was a prayer, the emotion in his voice almost making her sob.
She moved closer to him. "I won't let this happen to you," she whispered.
The corner of his mouth tilted upwards into a sad smile. "I'm not sure you have much of a choice," he said regretfully.
Abby's anger flared. How dare he say that? How dare he be resigned to his fate? Didn't he know how much she cared about him? How devastated she would be if Pike killed him?
"There's always a choice," she said, suddenly taken back to the Ark when she had said the same thing to him, albeit in very different circumstances.
The 100 had barely been on the ground a day. When tending to Jaha after her been shot, Abby had used moe supplies than she was legally allowed to as per the rationing system. Kane had found her guilty and sentenced her to be floated. He'd claimed that he'd had no choice, that he had to act according to the rules of the Ark but Abby had seen through him. She told him that there was always a choice, that he wasn't being forced into anything.
It was funny how Abby yearned for those days now. They were not easy, and she had come close to dying more than once, but at least she didn't have to worry about losing Marcus. She hadn't even really cared about Kane back then, not really. He was Kane back then, not Marcus; in Abby's mind there was a firm separation. Kane was the man she couldn't stand, the man who argued with her every policy and had tried to float her twice. Marcus, on the other hand, was the man who was always there for her even when no one else was; who made sure she got enough sleep; who wouldn't let her bury herself in her work and forget to eat; who would make her laugh when she felt like crying. He was her best friend, her closest confidant, her partner, he was the man she lo-"
Abby wouldn't let herself finish that thought. It was too painful.
"And I choose not to spend the precious time we have talking about what we can't control. You shouldn't either," said Marcus softly.
Abby scoffed. Did he really expect her to not even try? "Have you met me?"
Marcus chuckled. "Thankfully, yes."
He reached out his hands to brush away wayward strands of hair that had escaped Abby's ponytail. As his fingers tentatively touched her skin Abby's body tensed, yet at the same time she felt herself relaxing and suddenly craving more of his touch. It was an odd contrast, but then again, the same could be said of the two of them.
With neither of them daring to break eye contact, Marcus tucked the strands of her hair behind her eyes, but didn't move his hands away from her. His hands slowly trailed down Abby's neck, resting on her collarbone.
"Abby..." Marcus began. "If I..." He took a deep breath. "If this is the last time I see you, I need you to know that I-"
"No," said Abby, horror clawing at her heart as she realized what he was about to say. Had they been in practically any other situation, her heart would have probably burst with joy. They had been dancing around each other for a while now, both of them were aware that they were something more than just friends; they just didn't quite know how to define it. No, that wasn't true. She was pretty sure that they knew exactly what that 'something' was, they were just far too afraid to acknowledge it out loud.
At least, that's how it was for her. Of all the scenarios she had imagined of them finally admitting how they felt, this one had never even occurred to her. She had never wanted it to.
Abby's hands moved up to cup the sides of his face. "Don't. Not now. Not like this," she whispered, a single tear running down her cheek.
"I might not get another chance to say it," said Marcus in a pained voice.
"Don't talk like that, like you're going to die," said Abby.
"Abby-"
"No!" she snapped. "You are not going to die on treason because you were trying to do the right thing by our people. No, just no."
"Ab-"
She didn't let him talk, too consumed with anger and terrifying fear. "You know I do have to wonder, Marcus, if when you were conspiring against Pike - and without me, for some foolish reason, just in case you thought I forgot - that you were actively trying to make this happen. Maybe that was your plan all along." A hysterical sound that was somewhat of a cross between a laugh and a sob escaped her. "Maybe you were planning on sacrificing yourself and forcing me to go through the same pain as I did as when Jake-"
She stopped herself, fear seeping into her veins.
They were both very aware that she had just basically equaled losing Jake to the thought of losing him. That she had equaled the pain she'd feel of losing Marcus to the pain of losing her husband. That she had equaled Marcus's importance to her to that of her husband.
They were both very aware that she had come extremely close to saying what she hadn't let him to say.
"Abby," Marcus finally said softly.
"No," she repeated, her voice cracking. "I can't lose you." Tears were now freely running down her cheeks, she wasn't even bothering to try to prevent them. Her voice cracked and she whispered, "Not now, not ever."
Marcus leaned his forehead against hers and she closed her eyes. For a moment neither of them said anything, just breathing each other in.
"I'm not going to let this happen to you," Abby repeated.
This time, Marcus didn't argue. Suddenly exhausted, Abby moved to lay her head against his chest and Marcus's arms winded around her, holding her, as if trying to protect her. No, Abby realised, not to protect her but to savour her. He didn't think he'd get to do this again. This realisation made her tighten her grip on him.
They stayed like that, in that position, for a couple of minutes. Then, the doors reopened and Pike, Bellamy, and the guards where there. Without noticing, they had used up their 5 minutes.
At seeing them, Bellamy's expression became even more guilty looking. Pike, of course, felt no guilt. Abby didn't even want to call him a monster; that made it seem like he was unable to be held for his actions. Pike was a man - a awful, violent, irrational, crazy man who filled Abby with abhorrence - but still a man nonetheless. He would not be absolved for his crimes.
Reluctantly, Abby drew away from Marcus.
"May we meet again," said Marcus softly.
Abby swallowed. "May we meet again," she said firmly. That was a promise. She was going to see him again.
With that, Abby straightened her back, lifted her head up high, and exited the room determinedly. She would be damned if she was going to let this happen. She would need help though. Her mind wandered back to Bellamy's apologetic words and guilt-filled eyes. He would help her, she was sure of it. And he would just be the first. The corners of her mouth tuned up into a small smirk. Pike wouldn't know what hit him.
I hope you liked it. If you did - please review and let me know. If there's something you didn't like - I'm open to constructive criticism. :) I hope we all manage to get through tonight's episode :D