A/N: It's a sweet oneshot, Loves, for your viewing pleasure. Please enjoy.
Drum
A KakaSaku oneshot
Sakura does not understand why her heart is beating so fast.
A quick pulse in her wrist, so loud in her ears it is like a drum echoing off in the distance.
Pounding. Pounding.
Can he hear it, too? Kakashi's lips give a small twitch upward. There must be something here that he finds worth smiling about, but there are no clues as to what. He is always difficult to read.
Except for the fact that he is shaking. A very slight tremble along his arms and shoulders. He cannot hide it, even as he stands there with his hands in his pockets, trying to look calm as he always looks. Both of them trying to act as if nothing is different.
But something between them is different. Sakura doesn't know when this change has occurred. She doesn't know when she began acting so strange around her sensei, or when he began to act strange, too.
Sakura is breathless. There is no other way to describe the feeling. Lifted up and floating, yet held down by a thousand prickling needles crawling along her skin. Her lungs are tight like a rubber band. As if a vice has been wrapped around her chest. It's painful to breathe. Sakura cannot remember a time when it has been so difficult before.
They are standing together so close that they almost touch. The heat between them is delicious against the brisk air. Like warm liquid, soothing against the skin. They bask in this heat, wanting more. The energy is electric, crackling with life. A reaction just waiting to happen.
When she dares to look up at him… she finds that he is also looking back, with the same sort of tense and curious expression mirrored on his face.
Sakura exhales. A silver cloud in the cold.
He reaches out and warm fingers touch her own. A small shock goes through her body. Just a brush of his knuckles against her hand is enough to warm her up.
He is giving her a reminder. It's time to go now.
She brings up a hand to touch Kakashi's arm and feels the material of his sleeve beneath her fingers. The air is dry and static. His shirt is warm and soft. It's hard to imagine that they could ever be this close, or that they were ever distant before.
She is holding him back. Wait, not yet.
Then she hears it. The faint echo so much like the sound in her ears, but even farther away. It is quiet, and steady, and fast. A dull ring. A pounding beat, increasingly becoming more erratic. A warm flush washes over Sakura as recognition sinks in, and a rush of tingles flee down her spine.
She has heard this sound before.
It is the thumping of Kakashi's heart.
Sakura's eyes glow with understanding, her pink hair is static in the chill. The red headband that keeps the soft locks back is tied firmly around her head. She is a ninja. A fighter, healer, and friend. She thinks she has seen it all, experienced it all before, but there are times when she can still be surprised. Like now, with her lips parted ever so slightly, as she gazes up at her sensei.
Kakashi does well to avoid her gaze. He stands so still, even with Sakura gripping his arm. All she can see is his headband and mask as he studiously looks off in to the distance. Like a man in deep thought. More puffs of silver leave his mouth. There is still a slight tremble in his arms.
It is not the air that makes him shake.
She knows his heartbeat. She's heard it before. Across the battlefield perhaps, or while sitting next to him around the campfire, or underneath a tree. There are moments in training when Kakashi pulls Sakura so close in a grip, with adrenaline pumping around and through, and Sakura knows she has him on edge. He has to pay more attention because of her. These are moments when she feels proud.
Or the soft sound she hears at night, when they're in their sleeping bags. In the quiet of the dark. Just a few feet away. Heartbeats. It is the sound of reassurance. She knows her teammates are asleep. Safe.
But now… when she hears Kakashi's heartbeat going off in this moment, and the feeling she feels, what can she call it? It is elusive to name.
Kakashi knows there is more to life than hiding, but he is a man of mystery. When emotions crack through… it can be frightening. He prides himself in always being able to regain his cool.
Cold and warmth. Their heated bodies, and the chilly winter edge. The village gates stand before them. Bright red doors with words of warning that will chase enemies away. They are closed now. The two ninjas stand on cobblestone ground. When they call, the gates will open and they will be home.
The other two teammates, Naruto and Sai have already gone ahead. Inside, no doubt, celebrating the success of the mission with ramen. Through the gates of Konoha village traditions and rituals will resume.
Kakashi and Sakura have just arrived. The Copy ninja is always late, and by succession, his team partner is late, too. He has an excuse, though – a broken leg that needs healing, and time for Sakura to heal it. This happens in an inn, in a country across the border. One week ago.
What happens in between? Only Kakashi and Sakura know. Though, this can be said… he always respects her distance during the time, and he never touches her beyond the platonic. As for Sakura… she cannot stop her sideway glances, and sleeping around the campfire at night suddenly takes on a whole new meaning. The distance is so far yet so close.
She cannot help the new stammering when she talks. For some reason he cannot focus on his book. Nervousness eats at their bones. Their stomachs flutter at odd times, and a strange blank thoughts take over the mind when they walk together. A new sickness has taken place.
They are alone now in front of the gates. With nothing but the sound of their hearts to fill the air.
And she has his sleeve.
What do you call this feeling?
"We're not going to do this," Kakashi says quietly. There is a pause in the echo as he speaks, then it starts up again.
The sound of his voice makes Sakura want to do impossible things. She holds on, knowing that something is not quite right. That they can never be the same.
"I don't know… what you mean," she says. The slight stammer makes her want to bite her lip, swallow her words. Complete trepidation is not typical of Sakura, but she cannot help the sudden apprehension whenever she addresses the jounin.
"This confusion is normal for someone your age, Sakura," he chides her gently. "What you feel is just typical of growing up."
An embarrassed flush burns through Sakura's cheeks. She is seventeen, and she knows what she feels. This talk of age exhausts her. Since when is youth a crime?
Kakashi is a full grown, and the closest male contact she has. Sakura is a young woman. They are always together. Like stone brushing against kindle, it is only a matter of time before sparks will begin to fly.
A burning fire in the winter cold.
She is young, but fighting is useless. What other person has ever been as close to Kakashi as she has, or spent as much time with him as she has, or sent their chakra pouring through his veins? Sakura has been inside of Kakashi, and knows him more intimately than any other person, woman or man, ever will or can.
"Fighting is useless," Sakura says, voicing her thoughts. This time she does not tremble.
At the inn a week ago, as she sits on the side of the bed to heal his leg. The feeling between them is so strange. Sakura is convinced she can feel his thoughts. Even if he is quiet during the whole procedure. His books is out, eyes on the page, but his focus is not there.
His focus has been off for weeks.
Is it wrong that she wants him so bad, or that she suspects he wants her in the same way?
Kakashi's defense is not strong. His wall is breaking down…has been breaking down for a long time now. A little piece crumbles with each passing month as he realizes how difficult it is to stay his normal, detached self around Sakura.
Tight control slipping away.
There is so much that separates them. Age, status, and experience. Yet, before they walk into the village and leave the mission behind… Kakashi is convinced that he will make her forget such things even matter.
The air is so dry and static, each movement crackles in the air.
Kakashi moves in slowly, lowering his head and pulling his mask down with two fingers. Sakura closes her eyes. A green glow disappears behind spiky pink lashes. It all happens in a second, but stretches out for a gentle eternity.
Then their lips touch. Instant chemical reaction.
That tight feeling around Sakura's lungs snaps in that moment. A wild warm flush takes over. The sound of drumming is loud. She can feel it through their connection, the contact of their lips. Their heartbeats are erratic. His lips are soft and moving. Tender warmth against her mouth. Like a bright spark that finally ignites between them. After all the times she spends together with him, and the chakra she gives away, she finally gets something in return.
Fire. Blazing fire.
The heat that washes down their bodies is amazing. Sakura wants to reach up and wrap her arms around his neck, but her thoughts are frazzled and she cannot un-pry her tight grip around his arm. Then it's over, and Kakashi pulls away.
Dizzy, the world is spinning. The towering gates that loom before her look so tall.
Kakashi's mask is back up. His silver hair subtly moves with his head as he stands his full height. He lightly takes her gripping hand, and places it down by her side. There are bound to be marks on his arm beneath his sleeve. The jounin will find it later in the morning when he showers, and it will be a constant reminder every day until they fade away.
Which is only fair, considering that he has now marked Sakura in a deep down, impossible way. He will always on her mind, in her memories. She will never forget.
He is the first. The first kiss.
Though they don't know it at the time, he will also be the second, tenth, and the last. As well as all the ones in between.
That drumming echo fades away. Sakura is finally satisfied. Kakashi looks the same as he did a moment before, but now there is a calmness about him, too.
He calls out in a cool voice, and the village gates open slightly with a creak. Just enough for two people to enter inside.
When they walk in, sandals against the hard ground, there is a new closeness to them. No one will understand it until Sakura turns nineteen, and the truth comes out.
By that time, there will be no more need for hiding.