"Either you know where my brother is, or you don't. Either way, I'd really appreciate it if you'd stop fucking around and find him." Kylie said as her eyes scanned the hallway behind the man's head and she tried to find her older brother, Colby, better known as Seth to his co workers, the fans of the show, 1 third of the Shield.
"You sure you don't want me to hang around until he shows, cutie?" Brad Maddox asked as Kylie rolled her eyes and then said one more time, firmly, "No. And I'm pretty damn sure that I won't change my mind in the next 5 seconds either, so can you please for the love of Christ, fuck off already?"
He walked away grumbling and Kylie sighed, sinking to sit on the floor of the hallway, her head in her hands as she tried to sort out the mess she'd managed to get herself into, currently.
She'd come to her brother because her brother was the only safe haven she had left. Everywhere else she'd tried running to, her problems, - mainly an ex she'd like to murder with her bare hands – popped right back up again and frankly, she was getting more than a little sick of it.
Already, she could hear her older brother saying 'Told you so.' as he gave her that smirk he was notorious for giving. And he'd be right to say it, really. She'd deserve to hear him tell her he'd told her so.
The worst part in all of this was what she'd given up because she thought it'd make the person she really wanted happy. She'd given up the one guy she loved more than anything because she'd gotten sick of the feelings not being returned by that person, to her.
He kept making excuses like she was too young, or he was too messed up, or something, and no matter what he told her, she'd always try and convince him otherwise.
Until she just couldn't anymore, until it'd become clear that the one thing Jonathan Good was really good at was self destruction. He couldn't stop until he'd burned all of his bridges.
Unfortunately, she'd been one of the bridges burned, but she'd had the good sense to walk away first. She'd just gotten damn sick of being pushed to the side for prettier and better. She'd gotten sick of feeling something for him, admitting it and having him use it against her when he'd get pissed at her.
Of course, her brother, to be fair, had also warned her plenty of times about her relationship with Jon, how it'd never work out because he'd only hurt her to keep her from hurting him.
"Damn it, where the hell are you, Colby?" she muttered as she walked down the hallway, keeping her head down, careful not to meet anyone else's eyes, careful not to let everyone see just how stupid she'd been.
She'd just sent him a text, yet again , when she'd smashed directly into the very person she'd taken great pains to avoid since the last time they'd seen one another, the day she left because she couldn't take it anymore.
"I was thinkin about her, thinkin bout me, thinkin about us, what we gon be, opened my eyes, it was only just a dream.."
"Kylie." he muttered as he looked at her, the shock of actually seeing her, standing in front of him, in person at that, hitting him about as hard as a DDT.
"Jon.. Don't suppose you've seen Colby, have you?" she muttered, looking away quickly, not wanting to have the discussion about her appearance or what happened to her, with her former boyfriend, the only man she'd ever really let herself love and been burned by too many times over.
"He's in catering. What the hell are you doing here?" he snarled practically as he tried to keep the tough front up. Inside, deep down inside, seeing her again, it'd sort of knocked him on his ass, really. He'd actually been thinking a lot about her lately.
"None of your business. Now let me by." Kylie said hollowly as she shoved around him, trying to keep her bruises out of sight. But he grabbed her wrists, she winced in pain.. Too familiar, she knew exactly what those hands were capable of if he was angered enough. Apparently, he wasn't quite over her walking away from him yet.
She bit her lip and said stiffly, "Let me the fuck go now, or I'll fucking scream."
"Who did that to ya?" he asked as he made her look at him, anger surging, surprising him even more.
Just when he thought he was done with the past, with wondering what might have been if he hadn't thrown it all away, she shows up again in his life, naturally.
"Not any of your business either." Kylie said stubbornly as she jerked her hand free one more time, then stomped on his foot to make him let her leave, and tore off down the hallway.
When she turned the corner, she flopped into a nearby chair, and started to cry, seeing him again had been so very much harder on her than she'd originally thought when she'd come here tonight, intending to just find her brother, get the key to his place in Florida, and leave again after explaining the mess she was in, why she needed his apartment key and why she was going to be living with him for a while.
"Are you okay?" a familiar female voice asked her and she looked up, biting her lip as she shook her head no. "No, I'm not okay. I just.. I need to find Colby, Celeste, do you know where he is?"
"He's in catering. You're pale and shaking."
"Because I saw Jon again. And it didn't go over well."
"Ahh. I get it now. Do I need to spear him or.."
"No, just leave him alone, Celeste. I'm the one who walked away, remember?"
"Yeah, but nobody blames you, Ky."
"Yeah, Cel, but sometimes, I just wish I hadn't." Kylie said as she leaned back in her chair, her hand in her thick, long and wavy black hair as Kaitlyn held out her hand. "C'mon.. I'll walk down with you."
"Thanks. I need someone to talk to right now, or I'm gonna do something really, really stupid."
"Such as?"
"I'll go back there and find him again, Cel, I know it. The feelings, they never fucking left and seeing him again brought it all back.. How can you love someone so much and fear them in the same way?"
"Love's weird." the two toned Diva muttered as they walked down the hallway quietly.
Seth was sittting in catering when he saw his baby sister walk in. He groaned as soon as he saw her face and muttered to Roman, "Hey man, hold my food.. Do not let that fucking Ryback get it."
"What's going on?" Roman asked through a mouth full as he watched Seth take off at a run, and hug some girl he had only seen in pictures in Seth's photo albums until now.
"Sis, what the fuck did he do to you?" Seth demanded as Kylie sighed and said "It doesn't matter.. I left.. I came here to..."
"She's a little shaken up." Kaitlyn explained as Seth asked, "Why?"
"She had a run in with him."
"Did he hurt you too?"
"No, he didn't... He actually seemed concerned, which is totally above what I'd expect.. But as usual, he opened his mouth and proceeded to remind me why it'd never work."
"Okay, back to the situation that bought you here, sis.. We're done with that part of your life, you will NOT be going back." Seth said firmly as Kylie bit her lower lip and then muttered, "It's kinda hard, considering I still love him.."
Seth groaned and then said "So.. You left Michael tonight.. Did Michael do this to you?" as he gestured towards her face, her overall frantic and disheveled appearance.
Kylie nodded and Seth grabbed his keys and jacket as he said in a low growl, "That's fucking it, I'm going to murder him.. I knew when I came to stay on downtime he was up to something, I should have yanked you out of there then."
"Colby.. I'm an adult now.. I made the mess, I should clean it up."
"Oh no.. Not this time.. You just sit tight and let big brother get this, okay?"
"Like you did with Jon? You could have killed.."
"Kylie, we're not going back to it. It's in the past. You're just getting out of this mess, I'm not gonna sit back and watch you go back through that with him, again."
Kylie sighed as she sat down and took a few sips from a bottled water that Kaitlyn butted in line and got for her, then said quietly, "Just leave Michael alone, okay? Trust me, I handled it."
"If he's still breathing, sis, then it's not handled enough for me. Let me guess, he fucked some other girl, you confronted him, it turned to violence?"
"Basically, but hey.. This time, I hit him first."
Seth gaped at his sister and then smirked a little as he said "No shit.. Really? Quiet little meek you?"
"Yes, Colby, me. Occasionally, I do have it in me to get really good and pissed."
Dean walked into catering and sat down at the table with Roman, eyeing Seth and Kylie carefully as he said quietly, "That's her, man."
"Who?"
"The girl.. The one I was drunk off my ass the other night, talking about?"
"Ohhhh." Roman said as he suddenly realized exactly why Seth and Dean fought the way they did from time to time. "What happened to her?"
"Dunno, but when I find out, whoever did it is dead." Dean said as he snapped a plastic fork in half, watching her intently.
As soon as Seth got the key to his apartment, he also gave Kylie the key to the hotel room he was sharing with Dean and Roman while on the road. "Just go sleep, sis. We're gonna get in kinda late, most likely. Don't worry, I'll make damn sure Dean doesn't mess with you."
"I can drive."
"No, you are not. It's too damn late tonight, there's bad weather coming in and I don't want you getting upset and getting into a wreck." Seth said firmly as Kylie muttered, "Stop doing that."
"Doing what?"
"Babying me, Colby."
"I'm your older brother, it's what I'm supposed to do. Now just take the key card, go to the hotel and sleep. You look like you need sleep anyway. Then when I head home for downtime tomorrow, we can go together, make a road trip out of it."
She sighed as she smiled a little, hugged her older brother, and walked out of the arena, got into the rental car she'd gotten at the airport when her plane landed earlier.
He was right, she hadn't slept well in a very, very long time.
As soon as she was at the hotel room, she called her brother and checked in, then took a quick shower and fell into bed, squeezing her eyes shut. Just as she started to drift off to sleep, she thought about seeing Jon earlier, and how all the feelings were back.
She groaned in frustration as she shoved her head under the pillow in the second bed in the room.
They'd just walked out of the bar, when Seth realized that since Roman's fiance and kid were in town with him, Dean was rooming with him tonight. He grumbled as he palmed his forehead and then caught up to Dean in the parking lot.
"My sister's in my room. Keep your damn hands off. I mean it, Good. Don't make me kick your ass."
"Trust me.. Done with her. She left me, remember? Besides, why the hell would I want her? She's just a damn kid."
"She's only 4 years younger than you, damn it. But do not touch her."
Dean muttered something and lit a cigarette getting into his own rental car, pulling out of the parking lot. He'd been planning on going to a nightclub with Seth and some chick Seth met in this bar they'd both just left, but when Seth told him that Kylie was in the hotel room, well..
About ten minutes later, he slid the key into the key card slot on the hotel rooms door, found her sleeping fitfully on his bed of all places. He paced, swearing as he watched her, his hand in his hair.
"Fuck it." he muttered as he sank down onto the bed, slid into place behind her.
And just as he figured, glutton for punishment he thought himself to be currently, it was still a perfect damn fit.
Kylie rolled over just after 2 am and realized she couldn't really move much because someone was lying in bed behind her, their arm and leg thrown over her. She shot up in the bed after flinging the arm and leg off of her and turned on the light, then realized it was Jon.
She poked him awake and then said stiffly, "There's a couch, perfectly good one at that, right over there."
"What the fuck?"
"You heard me."
"Yeah, I heard you, Ky.. But your eyes say somethin entirely different." Dean muttered as he looked at her, then sat up.
Kylie rolled her eyes and then stood,turning off the lights and then snatching one of the queen sized pillows and a blanket as she walked over to the bed, not bothering to hide the fact that she still slept in one of his old t shirts.
Flopping onto the couch, she wiggled into a semi comfortable position as she lie there in the darkness, waiting on him to fall asleep.
"I knew I should have fucking driven back to Florida." she muttered to herself as she bit her lip, tried not to think of how right it'd felt to wake up, finding him in a rare moment of vulnerability holding her as tightly as possible.
He'd never done that when she was actually with him, hell, when they'd been together a few years before, she was lucky if he even came back from the bar after the shows at night – and he damn sure didn't come back and fall into bed behind her quietly, moving his lips across her shoulder blades-, even if he KNEW she were there waiting on him..
So what made him do it tonight?
" I swear now I can't take it, knowin somebody's got my baby, now you ain't around and all I can think is shoulda put it down shoulda got that ring,"
Dean lie there in the bed by himself as he thought back on all of the times he'd had her, waiting here, on him, before she'd just finally gotten sick of all of the pain and the lies, the hurt and the occasional temper flare up that resulted in him doing something he regretted later and hurting her physically.
What the hell had he done? Why had he even done it, really? And all it'd accomplished, from the looks of it, was push her straight into the arms of the first fuck that'd hurt her.
" Didn't give her all my love, I guess now I got my payback."
He stood and walked over to the couch, watched her lying there, asleep. He'd seen the red t shirt that went missing from his stuff a few years ago when she'd gotten up to make a hasty retreat to the couch just now and seeing it on her only reminded him of every single thing he'd done to make her walk away.
But he was the way he was, and she'd known it. The fact that she'd stuck around as long as she had back then, it'd frankly kind of surprised him, to be completely honest.
Parts of him now wanted to pick her up and carry her back to the bed, get in beside her again, just to fool himself into thinking for one night that he hadn't shoved her away back then, but he knew that wouldn't fix things either.
And standing there, in the dark, he shocked himself the most when he realized that yes, he actually did want to rewind things, fix them. He wanted to go back and fix everything he'd done to her. But he realized he couldn't, that frustrated him.
Finally, he did pick her up and put her on the bed, cover her up. He flopped down onto the couch and lie there pretty much just thinking about everything seeing Kylie again bought up for him.
If he ever got a second chance, he'd probably fuck it up all over again.. But stubbornly, parts of him, despite her having walked away in the first place because of the things he'd done to her, wanted to try again.
He sat up on the couch, walked over to the bed and sat in the chair next to it, drinking a cold Bud Light as he watched her sleeping.
Kylie rolled over and looked at him with a raised brow as she asked, "Something wrong?"
"Everything, Ky." he muttered as he looked at her bitterly, then asked casually, "So.. You're gonna ride back to Florida with Seth and me?"
"Crap.. You're going too?"
Dean nodded as he said quietly, "We're gonna talk."
"No, we're not, Jon, because I'm going back to sleep."
"No, you're not."
She growled to herself as she sat up and turned on the light then said finally, "Fine. You talk. I'm not in the mood."
"You said you wouldn't leave, Ky."
"And you promised me a lot of shit too, Jon." Kylie retorted as she bit her lower lip then said quietly, "Sorry, I.. I just wasn't really planning on running into you tonight. In fact, I kinda tried my best to avoid it."
The overhead lights coming on and Seth's growl had him standing quickly as Kylie said quietly, "Colby, just don't, okay?"
"I told him specifically NOT to mess with you." Seth said as he started towards Dean.
"And I told ya that I still loved her, damn it."
"Yeah? Well you have a damn funny way of showing it, man."
"Yeah? Tell me something I don't know. She knew what the fuck she was getting into."
"That might be true and god did I try and do anything I could to keep you two apart, man, but trust me.. She doesn't need this, not now."
"I'm just gonna go down to Celeste's room. It's fucking obvious you two are gonna fight and for no damn reason. And Jon? If you really loved me, you would have at least tried to stop me from walking out that door back then.. But hey, you didn't, did you?" Kylie said as she grabbed jeans, slid them on and took off down the stairwell outside, to Kaitlyn's room, on the floor below theirs.
She knocked on the door and Kaitlyn threw it open after a series of grumbling and swearing. When she saw Kylie standing there, she stepped aside and let her in then asked, "Let me guess.. They're fighting."
"And neither of them will listen to a damn thing I might say. But Jon.. He said he still loved me.."
"Right. Sure he does.. That's why he tried so damn hard the first time around, when he had you. Don't listen to him, Ky, you know how he is.. He'll say and do anything if he's bored, pretty much."
"Yeah, but the look in his eyes.."
"Meant nothing, Ky.. Let's just get some sleep, okay?" Kaitlyn said quietly as she explained the whole thing to Natalya who sighed and said "Let's just scoot the beds together and talk. I haven't seen you in a really, really long time."
"I know. I missed you guys."
"We missed you."
"Now, spill.. What's going on?"
Kylie explained everything and then ended by saying, "And then I see Jon again tonight and it all comes back."
After a few more minutes of mostly Nat and Kaitlyn trying to convince her that it was not a smart move to trust Dean when they had a history and he'd done so much to hurt her, try and break her down, she finally got calm and went to sleep.
Now all she had to do was get through the two days drive to Florida, and then get through about two weeks of his constantly being around, because he and Seth had the same apartment building..
But it was better than what she'd just come out of, right?
"I can do this. I have to do this." she muttered to herself sternly before finally letting herself go to sleep. But automatically, she started to dream of one of the many times they'd been together..
And the words they'd both said then, in the heat of the moment came back to haunt her, over and over, like a cd that's skipping.
x.x
'it's always gonna be me and you, babe. No matter what or who else tries to change it, we'll always find our way back. Promise me.'
'jon, I..'
'say it, babe.'
'okay, you're right.. it's always gonna be me and you. I love you, babe.'
he leaned down and kissed her roughly, his teeth nipping at her full lower lip as his hand wandered up her leg and he held her tightly against him, their argument from earlier in the night long forgotten, the two of them so completely wrapped up in one another.
Everything was right again, finally.
x.x