No Trouble For Foul: The Untold Story of Sorcerer's Stone
By the elusive Spectra16
A/N: Heh. You might hate me for this, but I only just read the first Harry Potter book, and decided to write a fan fiction about my experience. I had no interest to read it back when it first came out. But now I have, and I hope you will give me credit for that. Most of the characters this story is about is my OC's and their lives in Hogwarts. Of course, Harry and friends will be appearing frequently, but this story isn't about them.
Disclaimer: Most of the Snapery (mischievous actions against Severus, Snapery for short) will have been taken from "345 Ways To Piss Off Snape" from So if you notice that and call me a loser for stealing them, then I'm sorry. I obviously won't use all of them, and I'll probably make up some myself. Oh yeah, and I don't own Harry Potter. We already knew that, though.
Also, some of the OC's will be based on people I know. The most dead obvious one (at least to my friends that are reading this) will be a substitute teacher by the name of Mr. Monarski. He's a substitute teacher in real life. Also, there will be a boy named Twiggy, that is also based on a guy I used to know, named Twiggy. And a girl named Caspian will be in this story, based on a fan fiction writer named Caspian Nyghtvision. There will also be another girl who is based on Osaka from Azumanga Daioh. If you don't know what that is, look it up on google. I promise you happiness. Gave credit where credit is due.
Chapter One: The Only London Train That Leaves On Time
The Hogwarts Express was pretty much the only train in London that ever left on time. It was a magically bright red train that went directly to one of the most desired places on Earth; Hogwarts. Hogwarts is a school that teaches magic. And as strange as that concept is to someone who has lived their life as a Muggle, the first year students were no less than excited. Well, every student except Dan Seffron, whose parents were both wizards in the Ravenclaw house, and expected no less from their only son. Before he was born, they had hoped he would be a star in the Quidditch team, but looking at him now, that was the last thing you'd think of. His body is slender and pale from many hours in seclusion of his room. He did not like to play outside, nor did he like sunlight. His hair did not help his gloomy complexion, for it looked greasy and black, pulled down over his eyes. It was longer than most boy cuts. Barely passed his eyes.
Dan's equipment for Hogwarts was bundled close to him on the last seat in the car he was in. He quietly watched the other students talk busily. He figured making friends wouldn't be very easy, the way it had always been. The reason for his loner ways could've been because he just didn't care about anything. His parents found that he had very little interest for anything. When tested, they found that depression wasn't a factor in his apathy. Dan just showed little emotion. The way he had been born.
Dan was pulled from his daydream when a certain hyper active girl stood up on the seat a few rows in front of him.
"Everyone listen! I just came from the bathroom and heard that Harry Potter's on the train!" Her robe was already on, proudly showing off her Gryffindor insignia. Her hair was curled closely to her face and she had a cute complexion. Dan suddenly had interest in the girl and her news. Harry Potter? The boy that survived Voldemort? That's incredible. He must be my age, Dan pondered. He felt a short spark of interest to meet this boy. Or could this be an untruth?
Before Caspian Clinton left her stance on the train seat, she looked around at the new attendants of her favorite place on earth. She saw that everyone was busily gossiping about the lucky boy, except a certain strange looking boy that sat in back. She titled her head while looking at him, realizing he resembled someone… She stepped down from the seat, symbolizing the fact that she would be second best in the Gryffindor house, almost knowing that Harry Potter would be chosen as Gryffindor. Caspian walked slowly to the dark first year and sat next to him. His gaze didn't pull away from the window. She looked at him intently and poked him once. He turned to look at her. Caspian almost shivered from his dark eyes. Snape, she thought. She remembered her reason for sitting next to him.
"Hey, what's your name? You look like a first year," Caspian smiled, only so that he wouldn't get the wrong idea.
"Why do I look like a first year?" he looked down at what he was wearing. His robe still remained in his bag. He wore a black turtleneck sweater and jeans.
"You're not wearing your robe. I mean, I'd understand that if you were a Slytherin, but even they seem to be proud of their house," Caspian joked, but Dan didn't laugh.
"Oh no. You are a Slytherin," She covered her mouth with one hand. He cracked a weak smile.
"No. I am a first year," Dan said reluctantly. Caspian nodded.
"So what's your name?" Caspian asked curiously. Dan politely tried to brush her off.
"Twiggy," He said. Caspian suppressed a laugh.
"Is that your nickname?" Caspian asked and smiled widely. Dan felt a little like she cared.
"Yeah. It's been my nickname since 3rd grade," Dan looked down at his lap.
"And you still want it? You could've gotten rid of it by coming to a school with new people," Caspian stated the obvious. Dan shrugged.
"It's kinda grown on me," Dan admitted. Caspian nodded and smiled at him.
-.-.-.-.-
Harry and Ron sat together, feasting on Bertie Bots and eating chocolate frogs. The whole car was in whisper, knowing who's presence they were in. Lara Von Stellano and Lawrence Petkovski were in part of those whispers, also being first years.
"This is exciting! I hope I'm in his house! Maybe we'll be friends! Wouldn't that be cool?" Lara pulled her robe over her head. Lawrence grimaced.
"He looks like a total dork. Typical of Voldemort. Have pity on the less fortunate," Lawrence joked. Lara put her index finger to her lips and shushed him.
"How dare you say the name of you-know-who! Have you no shame?" Lara became concerned for her new found friend.
"It's been too long to fear him now. I happen to believe the crock pot is dead. If he went all soft on killing Potter, why should I fear him?" Lawrence puffed out his chest, seeming ignorant. Lara sighed.
"Well, don't come crying to me if he miraculously shows up and destroys us all!" Lara listlessly.
-.-.-.-.-
"You're just going to love Hogwarts. Everything there will be sure to keep you busy. Life will never be the same-," Caspian stopped. Curiously, Twiggy had quickly fallen asleep, and was not leaned up against the window. Caspian felt a tad embarrassed, but focused her attention on what to do while he was sleeping. She decided to look for her long time crush, Percy Weasley. It was his last year, and she'd be sad to see him leave. This year was her last chance to let him know that he was the only man for her. She left her messenger bag with Twiggy, and ran off to find him.
Twiggy awoke to the bustle of students walking off the train. He jerked up, looking for Caspian, but she wasn't sitting next to him any longer. All of a sudden, she ran into the cab and swiped her pack off of the ground. Twiggy smiled at the sight of her and she signaled him to come with her hand.
"Hurry up! This is our stop!" She said melodramatically. He followed closely as several red headed boys came from behind him. He looked back at their ecstatic nature and saw a boy with a scar on his forehead, closely following behind them.
"Ron, now when we get off the train, don't embarrass me with your "I miss mommy" stuff," one of the boys said. Another laughed. Ron, seeming to be the youngest one, narrowed his eyes. Twiggy scurried after Caspian.
The air seemed clear and crisp, and wonder filled his mind. Nothing seemed the same. Caspian was careful to keep a close eye on Twiggy. She felt it a courteous thing to help out first years. Eventually, every one learns about the pros and cons to Hogwarts, but a helpful boost can always make the whole experience more enjoyable. Sometimes it takes a helpful upper classman to aid you on your first day. Caspian thought of only Percy.
Hangrid lead the students to small boats to cross a river to Hogwarts. The first years stood in awe of it's majesty, and some of the second years did as well, forgetting the past. Percy and Fred got in a boat with Caspian and Twiggy. Twiggy looked around the area. By far, the school grabbed his attention the most.
"Have you met Harry Potter yet?" Caspian enthusiastically asked Percy. Percy and Fred nodded.
"Our youngest brother, Ron, seems to have been talking with him the whole ride here. Apparently, he knows absolutely nothing! Not even about Quidditch!" Percy seemed rather shocked. Caspian giggled. Percy paused, admiring her laughter, and then thought of something.
"Hey, do you still have lucky Rammstein?" Percy asked her, spotting her bag. Caspian's nose twitched.
"Of course I do! Here," She opened her bag and pulled out a clear bag. Twiggy became interested.
"Rammstein? Isn't that a band?" He asked quietly, as if the upper classmen would yell at him for speaking out.
"Yeah. I named him that because whenever I play Rammstein, he pretends to be dead," Caspian had a goldfish in the clear bag. It seemed happy as if opened and closed it's mouth. Twiggy quirked an eyebrow at the poor fish. Percy looked at Twiggy.
"What animal did you bring?" He asked Twiggy. Twiggy bit his lip.
"My family is going to send me an owl for my birthday in a week," He said quietly. Percy chuckled.
"Their going to owl you an owl! Heh," He laughed a little.
The four of them stepped into the vast school. Twiggy was taken by the expanse. It was beautiful. A few boys brushed by him in a snide manner. Caspian glared at them, almost immediately knowing they would be Slytherins. She had a good eye for who belonged in what house. The boy in the middle had his blonde hair slicked back and stood arrogantly. Two other boys walked at his heels, as if whipped, rabid dogs for him to send off. Caspian muttered under her breath, "Malfoy", but Twiggy didn't quite hear her. The group of students walked forward to the start-of-term banquet. Professor McGonagall was talking, but only the first years were listening.
Everyone sat down to the feast. There were few common foods missing from the banquet, and it made some first years wonder who cooked it all. There were cakes and turkey, mashed potatoes, and ham. Some students didn't know where to begin. Dumbledore, whom everyone knew, gave his speeches, and allowed the students to finish their meals. During the choosing of the houses, Twiggy noticed that Caspian guessed almost everyone's house correct. Except his own.
She pushed him to the hat and whispered in his ear.
"Don't worry. You're a raven claw," She said excitedly. But the hat declared something else.
"SLYTHERIN!" It yelled. Twiggy's jaw hung open as the Slytherin table cheered and clapped. He felt betrayed. His family would look down on this mishap. He felt sadden by this event. Caspian exclaimed, "What!" loudly, but only the people nearest to her (that knew she was good at guessing) heard her. Twiggy walked over to the Slytherin table and sat down.
Caspian halfheartedly invited Harry, Hermione, Ron, Neville, Lawrence and Lara (just to name a few) to the Gryffindor table. Throughout the rest of the meal, she sat across from Twiggy, wondering what the hat saw in him that she didn't. Percy sat closely next to her, but she didn't seem to care.
"Hey, Cap," Percy nudged Caspian.
"Hmm?" She didn't take her gaze off of Twiggy.
"This is my last year, so my brother's and I decided to do something really extravagant. You know, so that no one will forget me," Percy began. Caspian turned to face him.
"Okay," She expected him to go on.
"We're going to REALLY piss Snape off," He suppressed a wide smile.
"You mean, more than usual?" She asked sarcastically. Percy nodded.
"Like unusually more," Percy said and his brothers Fred and George snickered behind him. Caspian nodded.
"So you want me to help?" She asked.
"Yes. We don't care about our house points this year. We're going out with a bang," Percy smirked. He pulled a list made of parchment from his sack. It was titled, "365 Ways To Piss Off Professor Snape". Caspian's eyes opened wide and she giggled.
"This took me all summer to write. I figured five years of studying this stuff should make me an expert," Percy waved it around. She looked at the first one.
1. Learn a charm that gives it's unsuspecting victim a large, fluffy, white rabbit's tail. For a week. Put it to good use.
2. Tell him you've lost your pet werewolf and has he seen it?
3. Scatter rose-petals in front of him wherever he goes.
Percy snatched the list and stuffed it in his robe.
"I'll let you memorize these or copy them down later. We can't risk him or anyone seeing this right now," Percy was filled with excitement and anticipation. His brothers and Caspian were also quite enthusiastic about the idea.
"This is going to be one very interesting year," She smirked.