A/N don't own. This is the revised version, I hope that it is better than the previous version.
"It's time to leave," I whisper.
"NO! Please don't leave," a sad Ginny says, "Stay with us, with me."
I smile sadly, still holding on to the hope that I should not even be thinking about. If there was a way to stay with my friends, my love, my godson and my son, I'd take it in heartbeat, but I can't. I'm afraid, I can't breathe as I hold her in my arms. I have to leave, I have no choice. I want to stay.
Will I able to do so? Can I be that selfish for just this once? I know I can't be.
They won't understand. They do not see nor know of the orders that I must follow. Those given to me by the grand design, all for the greater good. I have to live a life I never wanted. I never stopped surviving, not even when the prophecy was fulfilled. I have to meet my destiny, for it did not end with the prophecy. It seems that I was created for things even greater than Voldemort.
My wife and my son, my Teddy, my nieces and nephews, Ron and Hermione, the Weasley family as a whole, my family. I have to leave them behind, there is no other way. I will be selfless once more, I have to be. I will not see them die, just because I cannot live without them. I will not have my lack of sacrifice kill another generation.
I'd rather become an empty shell, with my green eyes jaded, knowing that they are safe, than that I have to see them die in front of me one by one.
I do not quite understand why it had to be me. Was it because of who I was, or what I was becoming? I was well on my way to being just Harry, but it has been decided that just Harry may never be, because that is when my life ends. Once I've reached that goal.
I talked to Ginny about it, we spent weeks trying to figure it out. I know that she doesn't want me to go either. I mean the world to her, just like she does to me. Little James is my sun, he brightens my day every time I come home from work, every time I open the door and see him sleeping on my wife's lap.
Doesn't that mean anything to anyone? How can fate be this cruel?
Selfishly I turn my back on her, not wanting to face her while her tears were falling. I can't face her when I hurt her. I hate myself when I do that, it makes me angry.
"You know that I do not have a choice," I allow a lonely tear to trail down my cheek.
"You have a choice! Be selfish, stay with James and Teddy, if not with me. They are your sons! How can you even think about abandoning them?" She's letting all her sadness tear her apart. The tears are flowing and I have to restrain myself, I can't look her in the eye.
It is silent for a minute and I can't move. I'm abandoning them again, even though I'd promised to stay with her forever. She must have seen my frustration because she broke the awkward silence.
"But you are not selfish, how can I even ask you to be?" she whispers, understanding taking over her entire face. "There will never be a person in the world who can claim that. How can I ask you to? How can I be such a monster?" her words get softer gradually and I cave in.
I look at her and see her in the moonlight. She is beautiful, she never stopped being beautiful. How can I leave her, my son and my godson. I promised Remus to take care of him. I called Remus a coward when he tried to run away from his son and his wife. And right now I'm doing the same.
I said that my father would've been ashamed of him. Can I do it? Will I become a coward? My parents would be disappointed in me. How can I even try to do this?
"You don't have a choice Harry, not like Remus did. What you're going to do is saving other lives, hundreds, maybe thousands. You'll be a hero, not a coward. I shouldn't try to change your mind, I should help you, because I love you more than anyone on earth."
Ginny could always read me like an open book. Ron told me once that he thought I could read her mind. She loved me, she would support me, because she knew that I had no choice.
"I'll wait for you. I'll wait for you to come home. You will be there for the birth of our second child, I know it." She was full of conviction and determination. She was sure that I would be back in time for my child's birth, my second child.
"I'll try, Ginny. I will try to make it in time for his or her birth. I promise, I'll come back to them, to you." I had to, this was a choice I did have, I will choose what's right, just like I did before. I never did like the easy way.
"I love you, with all my heart, I'll come home," I said. Going was inevitable, coming back would never be.
"I love you, with all my heart, come back to us," she replied. She hugged me and her tears dried. She had accepted what was to come, I couldn't ask for more.
This was it, there was no turning back. I kissed the top of her forehead and turned my back to her once again.
"Goodbye."
I grabbed the small bag that held all of my possessions.
I walked past the apparition wards of our house and saw my wife one last time. She had a small smile on her face, her fingers clutched around the necklace that held the symbol of the Deathly Hallows. I looked at my finger and touched the stone while I flicked my wrist and the Elder wand appeared in my hand. The wand that had once more been taken from Dumbledore's grave and that I had fought for once more. My curse and my gift. Master of death once again. I grabbed my invisibility cloak and disappeared.
A lonely tear fell to the ground, the only evidence that I had ever lived there.