Inner Desires
NOTES: Xander's dating Cordelia in public, Angel hasn't lost his soul, Jenny is still alive, Willow's just started getting into magic. Buffy is a bimbo, Willow is with Oz, and Buffy has her eighteenth birthday during this fic. It also takes place before `Killed by Death'. I'm afraid I `borrowed' an idea from Charmed for this one.
SUMMARY: The Scooby Gang see a different side of Xander as his inner personality asserts itself.
PAIRINGS: Xander/Cordelia, Buffy/Angel, Giles/Jenny, Willow/Oz, Xander/Original character.
DISCLAIMER: I only own myself. Sad, really. Although I rent out my brother for underprivileged people who do not have their own monster. DON'T SUE ME OR I'LL CRY! (That's sarcasm by the way. Although I might shout a lot.)
RATING: PG-13, give or take.
***********************
The club was dark, noisy and crowded, but that only added to the intimacy. The dark-haired male gulped down the last of his vodka and walked purposefully over to the bar, where a pretty blonde girl was dancing and handing out drinks to whoever asked. The guy leant up to her and put his mouth to her ear. "What's your name?"
She turned and gave him a dazzling smile. Shan studied the man. He had dark hair and dark eyes, with the nicest grin. He was wearing black trousers with a chain going from one leg to the other. He was wearing a tight, red `Satan' top with a leather jacket over it. He looked good enough to eat. "I let the cute guys call me Shan."
The lad smiled a dazzling smile of his own, anyone who knew him would say that such flirting was not in his character. "Well what should I call you, then?"
Shan smirked, not used to jokes. "You know the answer, you don't need me stroking your ego."
The guy reached out and took one of her hands, pulling her towards the dance floor. In the middle of the song, Shan turned to the man who had wrapped his arms around her. "So what would your name be?"
He raised his eyebrows, "What, if I could choose?" Shan gave him a look that radiated `Don't-Push-It' ness. He smiled, and it was the most adorable thing that Shan had ever seen. "Call me Alex."
************************************
Xander sat bolt upright in his bed. That was the third night in a row that he'd been having these dreams. They were never the same either. It was as if he was sneaking out every night to party instead of going to sleep. Xander yawned. He felt as though he had been skipping his sleep as well.
Xander hopped out of bed and started the search for his trousers. He decided to go into the library today to ask Giles if there was something weird going on. Of course it is possible that I'm just having wild fantasies again.
As Xander finished dressing and left his room, the sun reflected off of a bottle cap on the floor with a known vodka brand written on it.
***********************************
To Xander's frustration, he had to sit through an entire Sociology lesson before he could escape to the library. I could have got here early, but why would anyone go to school unless they really have to?
He walked in through the library doors and sat down. Cordelia put her hand on his. He smiled at her, she smiled back. Not as nice as Shan's smile he thought to himself, then he mentally scolded himself. She's a figment of your imagination, Harris! You need a life.
Giles smiled at everyone, taking in their appearances and moods today. He did this everyday so that he could come to some conclusion as to how the day would be. Everybody seemed to be cheerful enough, apart from Xander who looked extremely tired. "Right, erm. Buffy, how was your patrol?"
She sighed. "It was weird."
Willow perked up. "Weird? How so? You mean like magic weird? Because I could help if it was magic-related." Jenny had been teaching her some interesting skills recently, but Giles was worried about Willow's involvement in something so dangerous.
Buffy smiled. "No Will, it wasn't magic weird. More sort of new-leader-in-town-gathering-an-army-of-vampires weird."
Giles raised his eyebrows. "What exactly pushed you to come to that conclusion?"
Buffy's mouth dropped open in mock horror. "Why are you so surprised? I often come up with amazing plans and strategies!"
Cordelia gave a bitter laugh. "Only if you saw it in a book with pictures called `strategies: The lift-the-flap edition."
Buffy retaliated. "At least I don't get all my outfits from Hooker Monthly!"
"At least I have a life!"
"At least I have a cool boyfriend! Oh God, I'm sorry Xander."
Everyone stopped and looked at Xander. Fortunately for Buffy he hadn't heard much of their argument, as he had fallen asleep with his head on the table.
*******************
Shan smiled as Xander/Alex walked in through the door of the club. He walked up to her. "May I have this dance?"
She pretended to think about this. "Hmm, I don't know. What's in it for me?"
Xander/Alex pulled her face down to his and kissed her passionately, pushing his tongue into her mouth. She let him. When they pulled apart, she grinned at him. "You know, I am really busy."
Xander/Alex shrugged. "I can come back later."
*******************
Xander jumped up. "Huh?"
Giles let go of his arm and Xander saw that the library was empty. Giles smiled at him. "The meeting ended half an hour ago."
Xander raised his eyebrows and looked around him. "Oh. "What happened, anything good?"
Giles sighed and shook his head. "No. Buffy says there's a new vampire leader in town that goes by the name of Farrell. All the vampires under his command wear a strange sort of charm around their necks."
"Sounds like trouble."
"Indeed. But I have Willow and Jenny looking into it, and I can't imagine these newbies striking any time soon. But there is one thing that worries me more."
"Uh oh, is the world ending?"
"I doubt it."
"It's gonna rain toads?"
"Not according to the weather broadcast."
"Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny and The Tooth Fairy are planning to take control of the human race using subliminal messaging?"
"Possibly. But I can't say that it will be keeping me awake at night."
"Then what is it?"
"One of my favourite Slayerettes has been worrying his friends with his behaviour this past week. He also looks like death. Then he fell asleep during a Scooby meeting and he still won't tell anyone what's going on."
"Well I guess Oz must still be learning to cope with the lycanthropy thing."
"Xander...is everything alright at home?"
"No, but that's not the problem. Relax, I'll talk to you. I would have told anyone, but nobody asked, so I just thought that perhaps nobody wanted to know. I mean, they don't usually care."
Giles gave a sympathetic look. "Xander..."
"Giles, I'm about to talk to you. Be quiet." Xander went on to tell the entire story to the Watcher, who sat there and occasionally nodded.
**************************
Cordelia sat in her maths lesson, tapping her pen on the desk nervously. There's something up with Xander, I know it. He hasn't been nearly as enthusiastic in the janitor's closet. Whatever it is, he'd better sort himself out, because I am not putting up with the Cryptic Guy act with him.
Buffy sat next to Cordelia, chewing on her pencil and trying to concentrate on the teacher. He was saying something about simultaneous equations. That's a stupid name for a topic. I wonder what's up with Xander, he's been strange recently. Well, I hope he quits this behaviour soon, because I need a cheerful friend who can make me laugh. I can't say I really care for the way he's acting at the moment. Buffy looked at Willow and Oz, who were holding each other's hands in front of her. They'd better not be like that at my birthday, unless Angel shows up to distract me.
It was soon going to be her eighteenth birthday. Buffy couldn't help but smile. Her friends had promised her that no evil was going to ruin her birthday this year. And she believed them. She had sworn that if anything remotely bad happened this time, she would swear off of birthdays and become Petra Pan, the girl who never grew up.
************
"Xander, these do not sound like your average dreams."
"But what can I do about it? It's Buffy's birthday party tomorrow night, and we promised to keep it natural without the super and normal without the para."
Giles sighed and picked up a couple of volumes from his desk. "Xander, it was an empty promise. Everyone knows that, even Buffy. We are not to blame for the Hellmouth's bad timing."
"But we promised."
"I know. But we're going to have to tell the others that something weird is going on, for your sake."
"I don't care about my sake!" Suddenly Xander went really dizzy and collapsed into a chair, gasping for breath and trying to stay conscious.
"Are you sure about that?"
Xander opened his eyes and looked at Giles. "Yes. Buffy is going to have a nice birthday if it kills me."
Giles sighed. "Okay, Xander. Go home and get some sleep. We'll try and sort out what's going on when all this is over."
Xander nodded and made his way out of the library.
**********************
That evening, Xander sat in his house alone with a bottle of Cola and a bag of crisps. He stared at the TV and sighed. "But Cole, you know that if you ran away, they'd go after Phoebe anyway to find out where you are." He took a swig of his drink. "Dumb ass."
He felt his eyes begin to close and he tried to keep them open. He hadn't slept like Giles had told him to. After all, if these dreams really are bad news, then surely it would be a bad idea to have them again? I will stay awake.
By the time the credits for Charmed were showing, Xander was asleep on the couch.
*************
"I told you I'd be back later."
Shan smiled and raised her eyebrows. "Yep, and I believed you. I can see I was right to do so."
Alex smiled and held out his hand. Shan took it, and they went to the dance floor. They danced closely as the band started playing a slow(er) song. After the song had ended, Shan looked Alex in the eye. "I need some air. Coming?"
Alex nodded and they walked out of the club together.
Angel looked at the club closely. He was being asked to check out all the places where the vamps might be hanging out, but this looked clean. It may be nothing but a noisy run down bar full of criminals and psychos, but nobody was getting killed at the moment. He had turned around and he was just about to leave, when he caught a familiar scent. "Xander?"
Angel had learnt how to detect all of Buffy's friends in case of an emergency, but he hadn't expected to find any of them here. He looked back over his shoulder and froze. Xander looked tougher somehow, but him and a girl were about to be pounced on by one of Farrell's minions!
But to Angel's surprise, Xander grabbed the vampire by the scruff of its neck and threw it into the opposite wall. What is up with him? Xander began punching the vampire until it's face was completely bloody, then he gave one final thrust to the neck. Angel was impressed. Not many people could dust a vampire with their bare hands. He reminded himself not to get on Xander's bad side. A bit late for that...
Alex watched as the vampire turned into dust and smiled. His friends would normally keep him out of the way so that he couldn't fight. `Poor little Xander can't defend himself.'
Shan stared in shock at the place where their attacker had been. "What the fuck was that?"
Alex smiled at her and pulled her to him. "A vampire."
Shan's eyes widened. "Hmm. Well I guess in theory they could exist. If a vampire was to attack me, theoretically of course, what would I do?"
Alex shrugged. "Well, theoretically, I guess a stake through the heart would do the trick. Then they explode into a theoretical pile of imaginary dust."
Shan nodded. "Okey-dokey. I think I've had enough air. I'm going in."
Alex smiled. "See ya soon."
Shan frowned. "You're not coming?"
Alex shook his head. "Nah, no time."
Angel watched as the girl went back into the club. This would give him the opportunity to talk to Xander. But before Angel could call Xander's name, Xander glowed blue and white for a brief second and disappeared. Angel just stood there, unsure of what to do. "Giles."
After Angel had left, a shadow turned to another. "Farrell will not be pleased with that boy."
The other nodded his head in agreement. "We should ask for an audience with the great one now. He needs to hear of the untimely death of one of his greatest warriors."
The shadows walked towards their leader's lair to find out what they should do about the boy.
*********************
Giles was reading a huge, dusty book about dream-walking, when he heard someone come through the library door. He picked up a crossbow and carefully looked to see who it was. He had learnt that in Sunnydale, it was always better to be safe than sorry. He cautiously peered around the shelf. "Angel?"
The vampire nodded. "Um, yeah. Can I talk to you?"
Giles looked unsure, but if Angel tried anything, well he was still holding a crossbow. "Yes, of course, by all means. Did you find any information about this Farrell?"
Angel frowned. "Kind of."
The Watcher sat on the sofa and took a sip of his tea. "What exactly do you mean?"
Angel went on to tell Giles just what he had seen when he had been checking out the club. "And he didn't have the same demeanour as Xander either, it was as if he was possessed."
Giles flicked through the book that he had been reading before Angel had come in. "Of course!"
Angel walked over to see what Giles had found. "What?"
Giles stood up, book still in his hand. "Xander came to see me earlier, complaining of strange dreams. What he told me was the same as what you just said."
Angel gave him a look of understanding. "So Xander wasn't dreaming."
Giles nodded. "Exactly. He is somehow projecting an astral-self into these places while his physical self is weaker, say, in his sleep."
Angel sighed. "Yeah, that makes sense. But how come he's acting so different? Surely his astral self would be just like him."
Giles shook his head. "Xander's inner self must have had a reason to wish to escape. I can only surmise that Xander has been suppressing this side of his personality for so long that the Hellmouth enabled it to take on it's own form."
"Why would anyone hide a part of their personality so much that it becomes another personality entirely?"
Giles raised his eyebrows at him. "You should know, Angelus. As should Ripper. But both me and you vent regularly, whereas Xander would be frowned upon for it."
"Why?"
Giles sighed at the vampire. "Xander has a specific role to fulfil in the Slayerette group. He sees it as his job to make everyone else feel better about a situation, make them appreciate their powers. When Xander acts differently, it affects the entire group, more so than Buffy or Willow."
Angel appeared to think about this. "He's under a lot of pressure to keep the group together."
Giles nodded. "He does such a good job of it too."
"Should we try and get him to vent?"
"It's possible, I guess. But the main problem is Buffy's birthday."
This immediately put Angel on alert. Any mention of his favourite vampire Slayer was enough to peak his interest in the conversation. "What about Buffy's birthday, will she be alright?"
Giles noticed Angel's sudden alarm and smiled slightly. "I'm sure she'll be fine. It's just that Xander refuses to tell them what is happening, so that Buffy can have a normal birthday. The fact that Xander is putting Buffy before himself in this way, just suppresses his inner-self further."
Angel nodded with realisation. "The more he thinks of other people before himself, the more powerful his selfish inner-self is. It'll probably grow too powerful to control."
Giles sighed. "Add that to the boy's lack of sleep and he'll be lapsing into his inner-self nearly all the time."
"So what do we do?"
Giles started to clean his glasses. "I think I'll divulge all this information to him and we'll try to sort it out after Buffy's birthday tomorrow. It will be difficult, but Xander will have to try and stay in control until then."
Angel nodded. "Let's hope that nothing will come up to make it difficult for him."
**********
The vampires saw Shan and Alex before they saw them. One grabbed Alex from behind. "Go!" He shouted to Shan. She took a look in his brown eyes and understood. She turned and ran to her motorbike. She risked a look back at Alex and her jaw dropped when she saw him glow and disappear.
Farrell's minions were too stunned for a minute to do anything. Then one of them snapped out of it. "Get the girl!" But before they could reach her, Shan had sped off into the distance on her black and red Harley Davison.
**********************************************
All of the group sat in the Bronze, which was unusually quiet. This was because they had all grouped together and paid to have the Bronze to themselves that night. They were playing dance music, much to Buffy's joy and Xander's anger. If I were in the club right now, they'd be playing Linkin Park. Xander felt a sudden dizziness sweep over him, but he willed himself to stay as the zeppo. Buffy had opened her presents from everyone:
A diary covered in Latin from Angel,
A wooden hairbrush which had been sharpened into a stake at one end from Giles, (to stop her complaining about the effects of slaying on her hair),
A huge bar of chocolate from Xander,
A set of trendy stationary from Willow,
Flowers from Oz,
A gift voucher for some very expensive stores from Cordelia,
And a book on stress from Jenny.
The music was playing and everyone was dancing, except Angel, Xander and Giles. They were sitting at the table watching everyone going crazy to music.
Giles shook his head. "I do not call this collection of various noises music."
Angel seemed to agree. "I don't think I could dance to this, even if I could dance at all."
Xander nodded. "Definitely not my type of music."
Angel and Giles both stared at him. Xander looked at them questioningly. "What?"
Giles spoke up first. "Me and Angel are both over thirty."
Xander's mouth widened in mock surprise. "No, really! You don't look a day over twenty-one, dahling."
Angel smirked at this. "What sort of music do you listen to, then?"
Xander smiled. "Rock, hip hop, rap..."
Angel raised his eyebrows. "I never really listened to much of them. What are they like these days?"
Giles sighed. "These days? Merely a competition to see who can swear and refer to most horrifying issues of modern society."
Xander shook his head. "No way! They have to rhyme."
Angel raised his eyebrows. "Oooh, that sounds difficult."
Xander sighed. "It is. Eminem's the only person I've heard who can refer to a weapon, a known serial-killer and his own opinion in one line while making it rhyme in tune."
Giles shook his head. "I can't stand Eminem."
Xander was shocked. "How can you say that about today's most twisted white rapper who has off-the-beat flow, way-off-the-beat lyrics and looney-tunes presentation which place him in a class by himself?"
Giles stared at him for a while. "I suppose you got that from your hero's songs?"
Xander grinned. "No, his book."
Just then, a motorbike burst through the doors of the Bronze, sending glass everywhere. Buffy jumped up. "Just who the hell are you?"
Xander saw Shan. Oh, the freedom, let's go. Xander groaned, "Oh damn," and collapsed on the floor. The air next to Shan turned blue for a second, and another Xander appeared. One who had a way decent taste in clothes. He looked a lot rougher than the Xander who poked fun at himself and ate Twinkies. Shan moved back, and Xander took the handles of the motorbike. Before anyone could stop them, they had driven out of the Bronze.
Willow ran to the unconscious Xander. Buffy ran to the exit and stared after them as they drove out of sight. "What the hell is going on?"
Giles sighed. "Surprise."
*****************
Shan had asked Alex to hang around outside by the bike while she got some stuff from the club. That had been fifteen minutes ago. Alex climbed off of his motorbike and went inside. It was quiet, which would have scared Xander. But Alex just looked around to see if he could find out what was going on. "Looking for her, boy?"
Alex turned and saw a vampire sitting in a chair near the stage. He had brown, spiky hair and a pierced lip. Must be Farrell. Next to him, there was a vampire who was probably a bouncer in life, holding a struggling Shan tightly. A bit of Xander's wit resurfaced as Alex sighed and said, "No actually, I was searching for the men's room."
Farrell growled. "Ah, a smart guy."
Alex raised one of his eyebrows. "Ah, a cliché."
Farrell growled again. Maybe his bark is worse than his bite, Alex thought hopefully. "Let's get this over with!"
Farrell clapped his hands, which served as some sort of signal to a bunch of vampires hanging out in the back. They all ran into the main bar area, crazed with bloodlust. Alex began to fight them as Shan struggled to free herself from the large vampire, which still had her in its clutches. Shan threw her head back, breaking the vampires nose. When it let go of her, she spun around and thrust her fist into its eye, then her heel into its groin.
Alex punched a vampire in the face, and then smashed a bottle on the side of the bar for a weapon. Alex ran the bottle into the nearest vampire's chest, making it keel over in pain. He began kicking the shit out a vampire that had tried to bite him, not noticing the one that was running up behind him.
Just as the vampire's fangs grazed Alex's neck, it convulsed in pain and fell away from him. Alex spun around and saw Shan standing there with a smoking gun. "Where d'ya get that?"
Shan smiled. "My pocket."
Farrell watched in horror as the girl and the Slayer's friend finished off all that remained of his vampire army. When they turned to face him, he reviewed the best course of action and ran for dear unlife.
Shan and Xander smiled at each other and began to make-out.
*************************************
Cordelia continued to slap Xander round the face. "Wake up, Xander! Wake up now! XANDER!"
Giles grabbed her arm. "That won't work, he's too far gone now. We'll have to try something else."
Buffy glared at him. "Well ya know, we wouldn't have to if someone had told us about this before!"
Angel sighed. "We wanted to, but Xander didn't want to worry you."
Willow spun around to face him. "You knew about this as well!"
Angel stepped back. "I only found out by accident when I saw his astral self."
Buffy growled at him. "Since when have you two cared about what Xander thinks?"
Jenny stood up and clapped her hands together loud enough to shut everyone up. "We have to get him to the library. Willow can summon Xander's astral self."
Willow stared up at her. "Me?" She squeaked, "why me? I'm sure you could do it better."
Jenny shook her head. "A lot of spells involving astral projection require a Wicca who is very close to the person. I think that you would be more suitable. Don't worry, I'll go through the spell with you before hand."
************
Willow, Buffy, Giles and Oz all stood in the library as Willow recited the incantation. Cordelia was at cheerleader practise. "The darkness breathes and walks from its own province. Bring it to us! Show the darkness which walks where it has been forbidden to be. Show it to us! Cast it here! Cast it!!"
*****************
No, no, no, no, no! Alex/Xander tried to stay free. Shan ran up to him concerned. "What is it, Alex?"
"They're trying to take me back..."
"Who? Back where?"
"They don't want Alex, they want their old Xander back!"
"Who? Your fucking so-called friends?"
Xander nodded. Then, he disappeared. Shan sighed. "I guess it's up to me to save him."
"No actually, I don't think you'll be able to do that." Shan spun around to see where the familiar voice had come from, as Farrell grabbed her neck.
********************
The Scooby Gang were beginning to doubt Willow's spell-casting ability, when all of a sudden, astral-Xander appeared in the room. He spun around and glared at Willow. "You! You bitch, send me back!"
Oz held Willow's hand to reassure her. "That's what we were planning to do."
"No! Don't make me go back in that body, I hate it!"
Buffy grabbed his arm. "Why?"
Xander stopped and looked at her. "Huh?"
Buffy searched the eyes of her friend. "Why do you hate being you?"
Xander sighed. "Give me one good reason not to."
Buffy grinned. "You're best friends with me."
Xander groaned. "Yeah, a whiny little Slayer who thinks the world revolves around her."
Buffy's mouth dropped open. Is that really Xander's opinion of me? Willow jumped up. "Ah-ha! You get to save the world!"
Xander shook his head. "No, I get to watch and possibly get in the way and mess things up. Of course, if you're all in a generous mood, I might have the honour of `doughnut-fetcher' bestowed upon me."
Giles stood up. "After all we've been through, you've survived. That's taken some skill."
Xander shrugged. "That or cowardice..."
Oz stared up at him. My turn... "And yet, through all of that, plus some possessions, giant insects, misleading romances and conflicted emotions, you've managed to stick with these guys. That takes a special something, surely. You might not think so, but we all know so."
Everybody gaped at Oz. That was possibly the longest thing they had ever heard him say. It was for my benefit, too, Xander thought with a smile. His shoulders sagged with defeat. "Okay. But only `cos you talked for ages."
He shone blue and disappeared, and then Xander began to regain consciousness. "Huh...what?" He looked around disorientated. Buffy and Willow ran over and squeezed him. Buffy held his face a little way away from hers. "You vent more often now, d'ya hear?" She said it with a serious face, then smiled to show she was joking.
Everyone was stood up when the library doors exploded inwards. Farrell stepped through, followed by about twelve vampires. "Farrell", Xander growled.
Buffy raised eyebrows. "That's him? He looks more like a failed punk-star."
Farrell smiled at her. "Ah, the mighty Slayer."
Buffy shook her head. "Someone's already used that one, try something else."
Farrell smirked. "What is it with wit around here? The boy's got a sense of humour as well. The girl had one too."
Xander stared at him. "What do you mean, `had'?"
Farrell grinned at Xander's nervousness. "I'll show you." He reached behind the doorway and dragged Shan's corpse into the middle of the library.
Xander couldn't move. He couldn't even think. Why does everybody I love end up dead? It was a bit late for him to realise he loved her now.
Buffy was watching Xander's expression intently. She could see that he had known this girl well.
Farrell had a short attention span. "Okay, you can kill them now." The vampires that had been standing around him rushed to the small group of people standing in the library.
Xander looked up to see three vampires running at him, hungry for his blood. The guys said I should vent. No time like the present... Xander grabbed the first vampire to reach him and swung him into another, using his own momentum to kick the third one down. He ran into the cage towards the weapons case. He grabbed out a crossbow and shot one of the vampires through the heart, only feeling minor satisfaction when it exploded into dust. He wasn't feeling much of anything at the moment, just rage. He snapped the crossbow when it had no ammo, and he threw one of the splintered pieces of wood into the nearest vampire's chest.
Buffy did a spin kick to knock down a vamp, and pulled the stake out of her pocket. Once she had dusted that one, she looked to see which of her friends needed the Slayer's attention the most. Definitely not Xander, she thought as she saw him drive a broken crossbow into a vampire.
Willow wasn't doing as well. She had managed to stake one, but the next one to attack her had her pinned to the floor. She struggled against its grip, trying to keep her neck away from the vamp's fangs.
Oz saw the vampire push his girlfriend to the floor and got mad. An unusual occurrence. He dived over to it and shoved his cross down its shirt. The vampire screamed in agony and rolled off of Willow, trying to get the holy symbol out of its clothes. It only succeeded in making it fall down its pants. While it was quite painfully distracted, Oz grabbed a crossbow bolt off the floor, which had previously been used by Xander, and stuck it in the vampire's heart. It screamed as it disintegrated into the air.
Giles grabbed a bottle of holy water from the table and smashed it into a vampire's face. It clawed at its facial features as it attempted to rid itself of the burning flesh. Giles grinned as it noticed the piece of wood sticking out from its chest. "You're not so..." he was cut off when a vampire tackled him from behind.
Xander grabbed the vampire off of the Watcher and drove the piece of crossbow into it, laughing when it turned to ashes. As he turned, he finished off another one that had gotten too close.
Buffy jumped onto the library counter and thrust her high heel into the eye of a vamp, then she jumped down and punched it in the face. She brought out Mr. Pointy and stuck it in the vampire, delighting in its squeals. She spun around to look for Farrell. He was hanging back to avoid unnecessary brawling. He was wearing a grey T-shirt and grey trousers, with a pair of black Reebok trainers to top it off. Before Buffy could reach him however, a vampire grabbed her off-guard.
Willow saw the vampire knock Buffy to the ground and ran over to help, staking the vampire before it could get too near to the Slayer who was down.
Oz protected Willow as she protected the unconscious Buffy. He staked a vampire as it approached his Wiccan girlfriend.
Giles punched a vampire, it punched him back. He kicked it in the shin, it kicked him back. He staked it, it scattered on the floor in return. He turned around to see Xander advancing on Farrell, stake in his hand.
Farrell grinned when he saw Xander walking towards him, armed with nothing but a pointy stick. He laughed out loud. "I don't know where you think you're putting that!"
Xander said nothing, just stared emotionless at the vampire that had killed the girl he had been having an affair with. No matter how that sounds, he still did wrong.
Farrell sighed. "I guess I'll have to kill you then? Oh well, I could always sire you. I think you'd make a good vamp. D'ya like Limp Bizkit?"
Xander sighed and began tossing the wooden stake from one hand to the other. Farrell grunted. "Fine, have it your way. I've never seen anyone so eager to die."
Xander shrugged. "What can I say? I've been told to try something new every day."
Farrell snarled and ran towards Xander. In one swift motion, Xander plunged the stake into the blonde vampire's heart. Farrell looked down at the wood, which had penetrated his heart. "Bollocks." Then he turned to dust on the floor.
Giles stared at Xander, surprise showing in his face. "Well done, Xander."
Xander grinned. "Why, thank you." Then his expression sobered and he knelt down next to Shan's lifeless body. "I'm sorry," he whispered quietly.
He looked around when he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Buffy. "Were you close?"
Xander smiled sadly. "More than Cordelia would have liked."
Buffy sighed. "I'm sorry." Then she stood and went to the phone, and dialled nine-one-one. With extremely good acting, she proceeded to cry into the phone, "ambulance, please hurry, there's been an attack at Sunnydale High's School Library!"
Everyone sat and waited for the ambulance to arrive, so that it could tell them what they already knew.
********************************************
Everybody sat around the table, talking about Der Kindestod, the demon that Buffy had recently terminated. Buffy thanked Xander for keeping guard at the hospital while she had been ill. Cordelia grunted. "Yeah, we know why he did it as well."
Xander sighed. "Cordelia, you know you're the only girl for me."
Apart from raised eyebrows, there was no disagreement from anyone else in the room.
THE END
NOTES: Xander's dating Cordelia in public, Angel hasn't lost his soul, Jenny is still alive, Willow's just started getting into magic. Buffy is a bimbo, Willow is with Oz, and Buffy has her eighteenth birthday during this fic. It also takes place before `Killed by Death'. I'm afraid I `borrowed' an idea from Charmed for this one.
SUMMARY: The Scooby Gang see a different side of Xander as his inner personality asserts itself.
PAIRINGS: Xander/Cordelia, Buffy/Angel, Giles/Jenny, Willow/Oz, Xander/Original character.
DISCLAIMER: I only own myself. Sad, really. Although I rent out my brother for underprivileged people who do not have their own monster. DON'T SUE ME OR I'LL CRY! (That's sarcasm by the way. Although I might shout a lot.)
RATING: PG-13, give or take.
***********************
The club was dark, noisy and crowded, but that only added to the intimacy. The dark-haired male gulped down the last of his vodka and walked purposefully over to the bar, where a pretty blonde girl was dancing and handing out drinks to whoever asked. The guy leant up to her and put his mouth to her ear. "What's your name?"
She turned and gave him a dazzling smile. Shan studied the man. He had dark hair and dark eyes, with the nicest grin. He was wearing black trousers with a chain going from one leg to the other. He was wearing a tight, red `Satan' top with a leather jacket over it. He looked good enough to eat. "I let the cute guys call me Shan."
The lad smiled a dazzling smile of his own, anyone who knew him would say that such flirting was not in his character. "Well what should I call you, then?"
Shan smirked, not used to jokes. "You know the answer, you don't need me stroking your ego."
The guy reached out and took one of her hands, pulling her towards the dance floor. In the middle of the song, Shan turned to the man who had wrapped his arms around her. "So what would your name be?"
He raised his eyebrows, "What, if I could choose?" Shan gave him a look that radiated `Don't-Push-It' ness. He smiled, and it was the most adorable thing that Shan had ever seen. "Call me Alex."
************************************
Xander sat bolt upright in his bed. That was the third night in a row that he'd been having these dreams. They were never the same either. It was as if he was sneaking out every night to party instead of going to sleep. Xander yawned. He felt as though he had been skipping his sleep as well.
Xander hopped out of bed and started the search for his trousers. He decided to go into the library today to ask Giles if there was something weird going on. Of course it is possible that I'm just having wild fantasies again.
As Xander finished dressing and left his room, the sun reflected off of a bottle cap on the floor with a known vodka brand written on it.
***********************************
To Xander's frustration, he had to sit through an entire Sociology lesson before he could escape to the library. I could have got here early, but why would anyone go to school unless they really have to?
He walked in through the library doors and sat down. Cordelia put her hand on his. He smiled at her, she smiled back. Not as nice as Shan's smile he thought to himself, then he mentally scolded himself. She's a figment of your imagination, Harris! You need a life.
Giles smiled at everyone, taking in their appearances and moods today. He did this everyday so that he could come to some conclusion as to how the day would be. Everybody seemed to be cheerful enough, apart from Xander who looked extremely tired. "Right, erm. Buffy, how was your patrol?"
She sighed. "It was weird."
Willow perked up. "Weird? How so? You mean like magic weird? Because I could help if it was magic-related." Jenny had been teaching her some interesting skills recently, but Giles was worried about Willow's involvement in something so dangerous.
Buffy smiled. "No Will, it wasn't magic weird. More sort of new-leader-in-town-gathering-an-army-of-vampires weird."
Giles raised his eyebrows. "What exactly pushed you to come to that conclusion?"
Buffy's mouth dropped open in mock horror. "Why are you so surprised? I often come up with amazing plans and strategies!"
Cordelia gave a bitter laugh. "Only if you saw it in a book with pictures called `strategies: The lift-the-flap edition."
Buffy retaliated. "At least I don't get all my outfits from Hooker Monthly!"
"At least I have a life!"
"At least I have a cool boyfriend! Oh God, I'm sorry Xander."
Everyone stopped and looked at Xander. Fortunately for Buffy he hadn't heard much of their argument, as he had fallen asleep with his head on the table.
*******************
Shan smiled as Xander/Alex walked in through the door of the club. He walked up to her. "May I have this dance?"
She pretended to think about this. "Hmm, I don't know. What's in it for me?"
Xander/Alex pulled her face down to his and kissed her passionately, pushing his tongue into her mouth. She let him. When they pulled apart, she grinned at him. "You know, I am really busy."
Xander/Alex shrugged. "I can come back later."
*******************
Xander jumped up. "Huh?"
Giles let go of his arm and Xander saw that the library was empty. Giles smiled at him. "The meeting ended half an hour ago."
Xander raised his eyebrows and looked around him. "Oh. "What happened, anything good?"
Giles sighed and shook his head. "No. Buffy says there's a new vampire leader in town that goes by the name of Farrell. All the vampires under his command wear a strange sort of charm around their necks."
"Sounds like trouble."
"Indeed. But I have Willow and Jenny looking into it, and I can't imagine these newbies striking any time soon. But there is one thing that worries me more."
"Uh oh, is the world ending?"
"I doubt it."
"It's gonna rain toads?"
"Not according to the weather broadcast."
"Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny and The Tooth Fairy are planning to take control of the human race using subliminal messaging?"
"Possibly. But I can't say that it will be keeping me awake at night."
"Then what is it?"
"One of my favourite Slayerettes has been worrying his friends with his behaviour this past week. He also looks like death. Then he fell asleep during a Scooby meeting and he still won't tell anyone what's going on."
"Well I guess Oz must still be learning to cope with the lycanthropy thing."
"Xander...is everything alright at home?"
"No, but that's not the problem. Relax, I'll talk to you. I would have told anyone, but nobody asked, so I just thought that perhaps nobody wanted to know. I mean, they don't usually care."
Giles gave a sympathetic look. "Xander..."
"Giles, I'm about to talk to you. Be quiet." Xander went on to tell the entire story to the Watcher, who sat there and occasionally nodded.
**************************
Cordelia sat in her maths lesson, tapping her pen on the desk nervously. There's something up with Xander, I know it. He hasn't been nearly as enthusiastic in the janitor's closet. Whatever it is, he'd better sort himself out, because I am not putting up with the Cryptic Guy act with him.
Buffy sat next to Cordelia, chewing on her pencil and trying to concentrate on the teacher. He was saying something about simultaneous equations. That's a stupid name for a topic. I wonder what's up with Xander, he's been strange recently. Well, I hope he quits this behaviour soon, because I need a cheerful friend who can make me laugh. I can't say I really care for the way he's acting at the moment. Buffy looked at Willow and Oz, who were holding each other's hands in front of her. They'd better not be like that at my birthday, unless Angel shows up to distract me.
It was soon going to be her eighteenth birthday. Buffy couldn't help but smile. Her friends had promised her that no evil was going to ruin her birthday this year. And she believed them. She had sworn that if anything remotely bad happened this time, she would swear off of birthdays and become Petra Pan, the girl who never grew up.
************
"Xander, these do not sound like your average dreams."
"But what can I do about it? It's Buffy's birthday party tomorrow night, and we promised to keep it natural without the super and normal without the para."
Giles sighed and picked up a couple of volumes from his desk. "Xander, it was an empty promise. Everyone knows that, even Buffy. We are not to blame for the Hellmouth's bad timing."
"But we promised."
"I know. But we're going to have to tell the others that something weird is going on, for your sake."
"I don't care about my sake!" Suddenly Xander went really dizzy and collapsed into a chair, gasping for breath and trying to stay conscious.
"Are you sure about that?"
Xander opened his eyes and looked at Giles. "Yes. Buffy is going to have a nice birthday if it kills me."
Giles sighed. "Okay, Xander. Go home and get some sleep. We'll try and sort out what's going on when all this is over."
Xander nodded and made his way out of the library.
**********************
That evening, Xander sat in his house alone with a bottle of Cola and a bag of crisps. He stared at the TV and sighed. "But Cole, you know that if you ran away, they'd go after Phoebe anyway to find out where you are." He took a swig of his drink. "Dumb ass."
He felt his eyes begin to close and he tried to keep them open. He hadn't slept like Giles had told him to. After all, if these dreams really are bad news, then surely it would be a bad idea to have them again? I will stay awake.
By the time the credits for Charmed were showing, Xander was asleep on the couch.
*************
"I told you I'd be back later."
Shan smiled and raised her eyebrows. "Yep, and I believed you. I can see I was right to do so."
Alex smiled and held out his hand. Shan took it, and they went to the dance floor. They danced closely as the band started playing a slow(er) song. After the song had ended, Shan looked Alex in the eye. "I need some air. Coming?"
Alex nodded and they walked out of the club together.
Angel looked at the club closely. He was being asked to check out all the places where the vamps might be hanging out, but this looked clean. It may be nothing but a noisy run down bar full of criminals and psychos, but nobody was getting killed at the moment. He had turned around and he was just about to leave, when he caught a familiar scent. "Xander?"
Angel had learnt how to detect all of Buffy's friends in case of an emergency, but he hadn't expected to find any of them here. He looked back over his shoulder and froze. Xander looked tougher somehow, but him and a girl were about to be pounced on by one of Farrell's minions!
But to Angel's surprise, Xander grabbed the vampire by the scruff of its neck and threw it into the opposite wall. What is up with him? Xander began punching the vampire until it's face was completely bloody, then he gave one final thrust to the neck. Angel was impressed. Not many people could dust a vampire with their bare hands. He reminded himself not to get on Xander's bad side. A bit late for that...
Alex watched as the vampire turned into dust and smiled. His friends would normally keep him out of the way so that he couldn't fight. `Poor little Xander can't defend himself.'
Shan stared in shock at the place where their attacker had been. "What the fuck was that?"
Alex smiled at her and pulled her to him. "A vampire."
Shan's eyes widened. "Hmm. Well I guess in theory they could exist. If a vampire was to attack me, theoretically of course, what would I do?"
Alex shrugged. "Well, theoretically, I guess a stake through the heart would do the trick. Then they explode into a theoretical pile of imaginary dust."
Shan nodded. "Okey-dokey. I think I've had enough air. I'm going in."
Alex smiled. "See ya soon."
Shan frowned. "You're not coming?"
Alex shook his head. "Nah, no time."
Angel watched as the girl went back into the club. This would give him the opportunity to talk to Xander. But before Angel could call Xander's name, Xander glowed blue and white for a brief second and disappeared. Angel just stood there, unsure of what to do. "Giles."
After Angel had left, a shadow turned to another. "Farrell will not be pleased with that boy."
The other nodded his head in agreement. "We should ask for an audience with the great one now. He needs to hear of the untimely death of one of his greatest warriors."
The shadows walked towards their leader's lair to find out what they should do about the boy.
*********************
Giles was reading a huge, dusty book about dream-walking, when he heard someone come through the library door. He picked up a crossbow and carefully looked to see who it was. He had learnt that in Sunnydale, it was always better to be safe than sorry. He cautiously peered around the shelf. "Angel?"
The vampire nodded. "Um, yeah. Can I talk to you?"
Giles looked unsure, but if Angel tried anything, well he was still holding a crossbow. "Yes, of course, by all means. Did you find any information about this Farrell?"
Angel frowned. "Kind of."
The Watcher sat on the sofa and took a sip of his tea. "What exactly do you mean?"
Angel went on to tell Giles just what he had seen when he had been checking out the club. "And he didn't have the same demeanour as Xander either, it was as if he was possessed."
Giles flicked through the book that he had been reading before Angel had come in. "Of course!"
Angel walked over to see what Giles had found. "What?"
Giles stood up, book still in his hand. "Xander came to see me earlier, complaining of strange dreams. What he told me was the same as what you just said."
Angel gave him a look of understanding. "So Xander wasn't dreaming."
Giles nodded. "Exactly. He is somehow projecting an astral-self into these places while his physical self is weaker, say, in his sleep."
Angel sighed. "Yeah, that makes sense. But how come he's acting so different? Surely his astral self would be just like him."
Giles shook his head. "Xander's inner self must have had a reason to wish to escape. I can only surmise that Xander has been suppressing this side of his personality for so long that the Hellmouth enabled it to take on it's own form."
"Why would anyone hide a part of their personality so much that it becomes another personality entirely?"
Giles raised his eyebrows at him. "You should know, Angelus. As should Ripper. But both me and you vent regularly, whereas Xander would be frowned upon for it."
"Why?"
Giles sighed at the vampire. "Xander has a specific role to fulfil in the Slayerette group. He sees it as his job to make everyone else feel better about a situation, make them appreciate their powers. When Xander acts differently, it affects the entire group, more so than Buffy or Willow."
Angel appeared to think about this. "He's under a lot of pressure to keep the group together."
Giles nodded. "He does such a good job of it too."
"Should we try and get him to vent?"
"It's possible, I guess. But the main problem is Buffy's birthday."
This immediately put Angel on alert. Any mention of his favourite vampire Slayer was enough to peak his interest in the conversation. "What about Buffy's birthday, will she be alright?"
Giles noticed Angel's sudden alarm and smiled slightly. "I'm sure she'll be fine. It's just that Xander refuses to tell them what is happening, so that Buffy can have a normal birthday. The fact that Xander is putting Buffy before himself in this way, just suppresses his inner-self further."
Angel nodded with realisation. "The more he thinks of other people before himself, the more powerful his selfish inner-self is. It'll probably grow too powerful to control."
Giles sighed. "Add that to the boy's lack of sleep and he'll be lapsing into his inner-self nearly all the time."
"So what do we do?"
Giles started to clean his glasses. "I think I'll divulge all this information to him and we'll try to sort it out after Buffy's birthday tomorrow. It will be difficult, but Xander will have to try and stay in control until then."
Angel nodded. "Let's hope that nothing will come up to make it difficult for him."
**********
The vampires saw Shan and Alex before they saw them. One grabbed Alex from behind. "Go!" He shouted to Shan. She took a look in his brown eyes and understood. She turned and ran to her motorbike. She risked a look back at Alex and her jaw dropped when she saw him glow and disappear.
Farrell's minions were too stunned for a minute to do anything. Then one of them snapped out of it. "Get the girl!" But before they could reach her, Shan had sped off into the distance on her black and red Harley Davison.
**********************************************
All of the group sat in the Bronze, which was unusually quiet. This was because they had all grouped together and paid to have the Bronze to themselves that night. They were playing dance music, much to Buffy's joy and Xander's anger. If I were in the club right now, they'd be playing Linkin Park. Xander felt a sudden dizziness sweep over him, but he willed himself to stay as the zeppo. Buffy had opened her presents from everyone:
A diary covered in Latin from Angel,
A wooden hairbrush which had been sharpened into a stake at one end from Giles, (to stop her complaining about the effects of slaying on her hair),
A huge bar of chocolate from Xander,
A set of trendy stationary from Willow,
Flowers from Oz,
A gift voucher for some very expensive stores from Cordelia,
And a book on stress from Jenny.
The music was playing and everyone was dancing, except Angel, Xander and Giles. They were sitting at the table watching everyone going crazy to music.
Giles shook his head. "I do not call this collection of various noises music."
Angel seemed to agree. "I don't think I could dance to this, even if I could dance at all."
Xander nodded. "Definitely not my type of music."
Angel and Giles both stared at him. Xander looked at them questioningly. "What?"
Giles spoke up first. "Me and Angel are both over thirty."
Xander's mouth widened in mock surprise. "No, really! You don't look a day over twenty-one, dahling."
Angel smirked at this. "What sort of music do you listen to, then?"
Xander smiled. "Rock, hip hop, rap..."
Angel raised his eyebrows. "I never really listened to much of them. What are they like these days?"
Giles sighed. "These days? Merely a competition to see who can swear and refer to most horrifying issues of modern society."
Xander shook his head. "No way! They have to rhyme."
Angel raised his eyebrows. "Oooh, that sounds difficult."
Xander sighed. "It is. Eminem's the only person I've heard who can refer to a weapon, a known serial-killer and his own opinion in one line while making it rhyme in tune."
Giles shook his head. "I can't stand Eminem."
Xander was shocked. "How can you say that about today's most twisted white rapper who has off-the-beat flow, way-off-the-beat lyrics and looney-tunes presentation which place him in a class by himself?"
Giles stared at him for a while. "I suppose you got that from your hero's songs?"
Xander grinned. "No, his book."
Just then, a motorbike burst through the doors of the Bronze, sending glass everywhere. Buffy jumped up. "Just who the hell are you?"
Xander saw Shan. Oh, the freedom, let's go. Xander groaned, "Oh damn," and collapsed on the floor. The air next to Shan turned blue for a second, and another Xander appeared. One who had a way decent taste in clothes. He looked a lot rougher than the Xander who poked fun at himself and ate Twinkies. Shan moved back, and Xander took the handles of the motorbike. Before anyone could stop them, they had driven out of the Bronze.
Willow ran to the unconscious Xander. Buffy ran to the exit and stared after them as they drove out of sight. "What the hell is going on?"
Giles sighed. "Surprise."
*****************
Shan had asked Alex to hang around outside by the bike while she got some stuff from the club. That had been fifteen minutes ago. Alex climbed off of his motorbike and went inside. It was quiet, which would have scared Xander. But Alex just looked around to see if he could find out what was going on. "Looking for her, boy?"
Alex turned and saw a vampire sitting in a chair near the stage. He had brown, spiky hair and a pierced lip. Must be Farrell. Next to him, there was a vampire who was probably a bouncer in life, holding a struggling Shan tightly. A bit of Xander's wit resurfaced as Alex sighed and said, "No actually, I was searching for the men's room."
Farrell growled. "Ah, a smart guy."
Alex raised one of his eyebrows. "Ah, a cliché."
Farrell growled again. Maybe his bark is worse than his bite, Alex thought hopefully. "Let's get this over with!"
Farrell clapped his hands, which served as some sort of signal to a bunch of vampires hanging out in the back. They all ran into the main bar area, crazed with bloodlust. Alex began to fight them as Shan struggled to free herself from the large vampire, which still had her in its clutches. Shan threw her head back, breaking the vampires nose. When it let go of her, she spun around and thrust her fist into its eye, then her heel into its groin.
Alex punched a vampire in the face, and then smashed a bottle on the side of the bar for a weapon. Alex ran the bottle into the nearest vampire's chest, making it keel over in pain. He began kicking the shit out a vampire that had tried to bite him, not noticing the one that was running up behind him.
Just as the vampire's fangs grazed Alex's neck, it convulsed in pain and fell away from him. Alex spun around and saw Shan standing there with a smoking gun. "Where d'ya get that?"
Shan smiled. "My pocket."
Farrell watched in horror as the girl and the Slayer's friend finished off all that remained of his vampire army. When they turned to face him, he reviewed the best course of action and ran for dear unlife.
Shan and Xander smiled at each other and began to make-out.
*************************************
Cordelia continued to slap Xander round the face. "Wake up, Xander! Wake up now! XANDER!"
Giles grabbed her arm. "That won't work, he's too far gone now. We'll have to try something else."
Buffy glared at him. "Well ya know, we wouldn't have to if someone had told us about this before!"
Angel sighed. "We wanted to, but Xander didn't want to worry you."
Willow spun around to face him. "You knew about this as well!"
Angel stepped back. "I only found out by accident when I saw his astral self."
Buffy growled at him. "Since when have you two cared about what Xander thinks?"
Jenny stood up and clapped her hands together loud enough to shut everyone up. "We have to get him to the library. Willow can summon Xander's astral self."
Willow stared up at her. "Me?" She squeaked, "why me? I'm sure you could do it better."
Jenny shook her head. "A lot of spells involving astral projection require a Wicca who is very close to the person. I think that you would be more suitable. Don't worry, I'll go through the spell with you before hand."
************
Willow, Buffy, Giles and Oz all stood in the library as Willow recited the incantation. Cordelia was at cheerleader practise. "The darkness breathes and walks from its own province. Bring it to us! Show the darkness which walks where it has been forbidden to be. Show it to us! Cast it here! Cast it!!"
*****************
No, no, no, no, no! Alex/Xander tried to stay free. Shan ran up to him concerned. "What is it, Alex?"
"They're trying to take me back..."
"Who? Back where?"
"They don't want Alex, they want their old Xander back!"
"Who? Your fucking so-called friends?"
Xander nodded. Then, he disappeared. Shan sighed. "I guess it's up to me to save him."
"No actually, I don't think you'll be able to do that." Shan spun around to see where the familiar voice had come from, as Farrell grabbed her neck.
********************
The Scooby Gang were beginning to doubt Willow's spell-casting ability, when all of a sudden, astral-Xander appeared in the room. He spun around and glared at Willow. "You! You bitch, send me back!"
Oz held Willow's hand to reassure her. "That's what we were planning to do."
"No! Don't make me go back in that body, I hate it!"
Buffy grabbed his arm. "Why?"
Xander stopped and looked at her. "Huh?"
Buffy searched the eyes of her friend. "Why do you hate being you?"
Xander sighed. "Give me one good reason not to."
Buffy grinned. "You're best friends with me."
Xander groaned. "Yeah, a whiny little Slayer who thinks the world revolves around her."
Buffy's mouth dropped open. Is that really Xander's opinion of me? Willow jumped up. "Ah-ha! You get to save the world!"
Xander shook his head. "No, I get to watch and possibly get in the way and mess things up. Of course, if you're all in a generous mood, I might have the honour of `doughnut-fetcher' bestowed upon me."
Giles stood up. "After all we've been through, you've survived. That's taken some skill."
Xander shrugged. "That or cowardice..."
Oz stared up at him. My turn... "And yet, through all of that, plus some possessions, giant insects, misleading romances and conflicted emotions, you've managed to stick with these guys. That takes a special something, surely. You might not think so, but we all know so."
Everybody gaped at Oz. That was possibly the longest thing they had ever heard him say. It was for my benefit, too, Xander thought with a smile. His shoulders sagged with defeat. "Okay. But only `cos you talked for ages."
He shone blue and disappeared, and then Xander began to regain consciousness. "Huh...what?" He looked around disorientated. Buffy and Willow ran over and squeezed him. Buffy held his face a little way away from hers. "You vent more often now, d'ya hear?" She said it with a serious face, then smiled to show she was joking.
Everyone was stood up when the library doors exploded inwards. Farrell stepped through, followed by about twelve vampires. "Farrell", Xander growled.
Buffy raised eyebrows. "That's him? He looks more like a failed punk-star."
Farrell smiled at her. "Ah, the mighty Slayer."
Buffy shook her head. "Someone's already used that one, try something else."
Farrell smirked. "What is it with wit around here? The boy's got a sense of humour as well. The girl had one too."
Xander stared at him. "What do you mean, `had'?"
Farrell grinned at Xander's nervousness. "I'll show you." He reached behind the doorway and dragged Shan's corpse into the middle of the library.
Xander couldn't move. He couldn't even think. Why does everybody I love end up dead? It was a bit late for him to realise he loved her now.
Buffy was watching Xander's expression intently. She could see that he had known this girl well.
Farrell had a short attention span. "Okay, you can kill them now." The vampires that had been standing around him rushed to the small group of people standing in the library.
Xander looked up to see three vampires running at him, hungry for his blood. The guys said I should vent. No time like the present... Xander grabbed the first vampire to reach him and swung him into another, using his own momentum to kick the third one down. He ran into the cage towards the weapons case. He grabbed out a crossbow and shot one of the vampires through the heart, only feeling minor satisfaction when it exploded into dust. He wasn't feeling much of anything at the moment, just rage. He snapped the crossbow when it had no ammo, and he threw one of the splintered pieces of wood into the nearest vampire's chest.
Buffy did a spin kick to knock down a vamp, and pulled the stake out of her pocket. Once she had dusted that one, she looked to see which of her friends needed the Slayer's attention the most. Definitely not Xander, she thought as she saw him drive a broken crossbow into a vampire.
Willow wasn't doing as well. She had managed to stake one, but the next one to attack her had her pinned to the floor. She struggled against its grip, trying to keep her neck away from the vamp's fangs.
Oz saw the vampire push his girlfriend to the floor and got mad. An unusual occurrence. He dived over to it and shoved his cross down its shirt. The vampire screamed in agony and rolled off of Willow, trying to get the holy symbol out of its clothes. It only succeeded in making it fall down its pants. While it was quite painfully distracted, Oz grabbed a crossbow bolt off the floor, which had previously been used by Xander, and stuck it in the vampire's heart. It screamed as it disintegrated into the air.
Giles grabbed a bottle of holy water from the table and smashed it into a vampire's face. It clawed at its facial features as it attempted to rid itself of the burning flesh. Giles grinned as it noticed the piece of wood sticking out from its chest. "You're not so..." he was cut off when a vampire tackled him from behind.
Xander grabbed the vampire off of the Watcher and drove the piece of crossbow into it, laughing when it turned to ashes. As he turned, he finished off another one that had gotten too close.
Buffy jumped onto the library counter and thrust her high heel into the eye of a vamp, then she jumped down and punched it in the face. She brought out Mr. Pointy and stuck it in the vampire, delighting in its squeals. She spun around to look for Farrell. He was hanging back to avoid unnecessary brawling. He was wearing a grey T-shirt and grey trousers, with a pair of black Reebok trainers to top it off. Before Buffy could reach him however, a vampire grabbed her off-guard.
Willow saw the vampire knock Buffy to the ground and ran over to help, staking the vampire before it could get too near to the Slayer who was down.
Oz protected Willow as she protected the unconscious Buffy. He staked a vampire as it approached his Wiccan girlfriend.
Giles punched a vampire, it punched him back. He kicked it in the shin, it kicked him back. He staked it, it scattered on the floor in return. He turned around to see Xander advancing on Farrell, stake in his hand.
Farrell grinned when he saw Xander walking towards him, armed with nothing but a pointy stick. He laughed out loud. "I don't know where you think you're putting that!"
Xander said nothing, just stared emotionless at the vampire that had killed the girl he had been having an affair with. No matter how that sounds, he still did wrong.
Farrell sighed. "I guess I'll have to kill you then? Oh well, I could always sire you. I think you'd make a good vamp. D'ya like Limp Bizkit?"
Xander sighed and began tossing the wooden stake from one hand to the other. Farrell grunted. "Fine, have it your way. I've never seen anyone so eager to die."
Xander shrugged. "What can I say? I've been told to try something new every day."
Farrell snarled and ran towards Xander. In one swift motion, Xander plunged the stake into the blonde vampire's heart. Farrell looked down at the wood, which had penetrated his heart. "Bollocks." Then he turned to dust on the floor.
Giles stared at Xander, surprise showing in his face. "Well done, Xander."
Xander grinned. "Why, thank you." Then his expression sobered and he knelt down next to Shan's lifeless body. "I'm sorry," he whispered quietly.
He looked around when he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Buffy. "Were you close?"
Xander smiled sadly. "More than Cordelia would have liked."
Buffy sighed. "I'm sorry." Then she stood and went to the phone, and dialled nine-one-one. With extremely good acting, she proceeded to cry into the phone, "ambulance, please hurry, there's been an attack at Sunnydale High's School Library!"
Everyone sat and waited for the ambulance to arrive, so that it could tell them what they already knew.
********************************************
Everybody sat around the table, talking about Der Kindestod, the demon that Buffy had recently terminated. Buffy thanked Xander for keeping guard at the hospital while she had been ill. Cordelia grunted. "Yeah, we know why he did it as well."
Xander sighed. "Cordelia, you know you're the only girl for me."
Apart from raised eyebrows, there was no disagreement from anyone else in the room.
THE END