Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.
A Final Shuddering Breath
"Please Edward?" I begged again. It never worked, but I couldn't give up.
"No Bella. I won't change you, and that's final." Edward said in a stern voice. He spoke to me like I was a child. I was twenty (which was a child compared to his one-hundred and something years, but still)! TWENTY! That number sounded like a dirty word. Edward was physically younger than me by three years. It was getting close to four. That's why the topic had come up again. It was September third, ten days until my birthday. Then, as if he could read my mind too, he spoke.
"Why do we always have this argument when your birthday is coming up?" Edward asked me, tucking a stray piece of hair behind my ear. His touch made me shiver, but I ignored it and kept up the argument.
"Because every time my birthday comes, I officially get older. I am getting older every day, every second!" I argued. "I'm going to get old, Edward. I'm going to get old, and then I'm going to die."
"That's how it's supposed to be Bella. You get old and then you die." Edward murmured softly. "You must remember that I'm a vampire, and that I'm not supposed to exist."
"You aren't the only vampire I know. Carlisle is perfectly capable of not killing me." I said, feeling bolder than normal today.
"No Bella. You know I would find a way to stop it." His eyes suddenly got a mischievous glint in them. "I could just whisk you away and we could disappear together."
"That doesn't sound so bad." I replied, blushing. The argument was let go. Not forgotten, just set aside for another day. Sensing the victory, Edward smiled my favorite, crooked smile.
"No it doesn't. Not bad at all, love." He said, stepping forward and pulling me to him.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
That was sixty-six years ago. When I'd graduated high school, I'd left Washington with the Cullen family. Aw, the hope I'd had back then. The moment I had hit twenty-five, I had started to doubt that I would ever become a vampire. When I hit thirty, all hope had drained away. I am eighty-six now, and I am on my death bed. When the first signs of heart failure showed themselves, Carlisle saw them right away. He insisted I be kept at the hospital, and that I would last longer that way. I had collapsed in sorrow when I'd heard the news.
I had been living in the moment for so long, that finding out that my time was up had effected me in ways I cannot describe. Plus, with the way Edward looked at me, It was easy to forget sometimes that I was old. He looked at me the same way he had when I'd been young and beautiful. He still told me constantly that I was beautiful. Even though I knew this wasn't the case, his words brought me a sense of peace that I rarely feel anymore.
Oh sweet, sweet Edward. It hurt me to leave him behind. I had made him promise that he would not follow me. I had also made the rest of our family promise to watch him. I didn't want him going back on his promise. He hadn't left my side in the two months I'd been in the hospital. I had told him constantly that he needed to go hunt, and that I could hold on for two hours. I decided to try again. His eyes were almost devoid of any golden hue.
"You need to hunt Edward." I said as I squeezed his hand, bringing him out of his thoughts.
"I'm fine Bella." He replied with a sad smile. "I don't want to lose a single second I have left with you."
"I can hold on-"
"For two more hours." Edward finished my sentence with a genuine smile. "I know sweetheart."
He leaned forward to plant a kiss on my forehead. I knew that there would be no more arguing on the subject. That thought tore at my heart. There was never any room to argue with Edward when he was set firm on something. He won every argument. Because of this, I was going to die. Because of this, I was going to hurt Edward. My heart skipped a beat, and I started to cry.
"Bella?" Edward asked nervously.
I gasped. My heart was beating at a dangerous speed. Right away I realized that this wasn't good. Edward knew at the same time.
"Carlisle!!" Edward cried out frantically. "Come fast! No one will see you!"
Before I could blink, Carlisle came bursting through the door at vampire speed and had already started pressing buttons and adjusting dials by the time the door had shut behind him. The rest of the Cullen family came in not five seconds later, Alice and Esme in the lead.
"Alice, feed this through the IV tube." Carlisle said in a calm, commanding voice as he handed Alice a syringe. "Esme, come help me with this. Edward, reach over and give her a bit more oxygen."
"How much?" Edward asked. He must have gotten the answer from Carlisle's thoughts, because he leaned over and turned a dial slightly. He was looking back at me before a whole second had passed. He took my hand in both of his and spoke to me. "Stay with us Bella."
"Edward, I love you." It was amazing how hard it was for me to talk."
"I love you too Bella. That's why you can't leave me, not yet." He said, tears that would never fall reflecting in his eyes.
"You will never be ready… to let me go." I said, gasping for breath in the middle of my sentence.
"Edward, give her a little more." Carlisle instructed, interrupting whatever Edward was about to say in reply. Everyone was darting around the room, trying to keep me alive. I couldn't take this. This isn't how I wanted it to end.
"Everyone… stop. It's time for… me to go. I can feel it. There is nothing… anyone can …do for me now, not even… you guys." I said, giving a slight laugh. I knew my words were true, and the others seemed to feel it too. They all came to crowd around my bed. Jasper spoke first.
"I wish I could have gotten to know you better Bella. I'll miss you, my darling little sis." He said, sadness in his eyes.
"I told Eddie here once that I was glad he didn't kill because everything was so much more fun with you around. I don't think I'll be able to go back to the way things were before you came into our lives. Scratch that, I don't want things to go back." Emmett said, dropping his head. Rose spoke next.
"I am so glad that I stopped being cold towards you. I gained another amazing sister. It hurts to see you go." Rosalie said, her voice breaking slightly on her last sentence.
"You know that I jumped off the cliff because I lost my child. From the moment Edward brought you home to meet us, you were a daughter to me. I cannot believe I am going to lose another." Esme said, dry sobbing.
"Like Esme said, you were a daughter to us from the start. I am not even going to try and tell you how hard it is to let you go. I'll miss you Isabella." Carlisle stated, his last sentence coming out in a whisper.
"Oh Bella!" Alice cried, leaning down and giving me a hug. "Even though I saw this ending in your future, I can't believe it has come true. The rest of forever looks so bleak without you there."
Tears poured out of my eyes, and I no longer had the energy to speak. I sent out waves of love and gratefulness while giving Jasper a pointed look, hoping he would get it.
"By Bella's feelings, I assume she wants me to say thank you to everyone, and that she loves us." Jasper said hesitantly. I smiled to him, sending another wave of thanks to him. He nodded back and me and smiled in return.
"We love you too Bella. Come on everyone." Carlisle said, ushering everyone out of the room. "Let us give Edward and Bella these last moments."
Carlisle's words got everyone dry sobbing. They each gave me one last hug or peck on the cheek, even Jasper gave me a slight hug. Emmett even added a little hair ruffle as he went out the door. When the door had clicked shut, I looked to Edward.
"I should have changed you. I'm so selfish. I thought I knew what was best for you. It isn't only myself I've hurt though. I've hurt you and my whole family too." He said as he stoked my cheek.
"Don't Edward." I barely got out. "Don't… blame yourself."
"Then who is there to blame Bella?" Edward asked seriously.
"You don't… always have to… blame someone." I forced out.
"I'm sorry that I didn't change you when you asked me to." Edward apologized.
I just squeezed his hand in reassurance. I didn't have much left in me. My heart rate was dangerously slow and unsteady. After about two more minutes of Edward and I just enjoying each other company, I felt myself slipping.
"I love you Bella, and I always will." He declared, knowing that I was almost gone.
"I love you… too Edward, and I will… even in… death." With that, my eyes fluttered closed. I was so tired. My body seemed weightless. Suddenly, I felt a light wind brush against my cheek.
"Good-bye, my Bella." I heard Edward's velvet voice whisper. He sounded as peaceful as I felt. I sighed in contentment. He would go on with his family, then when the time was right, we would see each other again. Somehow I knew that he felt the same way. There was a steady beeping then, and I knew that my heart had given up. I took in a final shuddering breath.
A/N: I had to write this. It was one of those things that just needed to be done. I couldn't get the thought out of my mind no matter how hard I tried. I hope you guys liked it.