I originally wrote this fanfic 2 years ago on the back of a newspaper. I am in the process of uploading it, so bear with me. If you don't like seeing a dark Hermione do not read. Ive lost the original first chappy.
0#Tears before Wake.
Hermione looked in the shattered looking glass by her bed, everything was shattered in her room that was made of glass, and sometimes she just liked to bleed to let all the pain escape. It was still her main urge, to prove to herself that she was still alive. She hated herself, but she hated everyone else more.
She done up her studded collar around her neck, tight, she liked it tight. She hated how humans were made to rely on breathing, to live.
She picked up her old class photo which was lying smashed under the bed. Those were the days, she thought to herself. She hadn't spoken to Harry and Ron ever since they made it clear that they did not want a drug addict as a friend. Dumbledore had told her to leave Hogwarts, where she was a charms apprentice.
She couldn't blame them, and yet she did, as she felt that as friends they could have helped rather than sat back and looked as she was falling.
That was when she was 21. Now she was 26 and spent her life between the local fetish bar Gothica Star, and her worn down apartment, in muggle London. She had pretty much given up magic these days, She hated it really for what it had done to her.
1# Would you admit defeat.
Another day, another struggle to raise the rent money ,for her muggle apartment. She flicked her dark limp hair from her twinkle less eyes. It was clear for anyone to see that this girl was just another junkie. She had a £500 a day heroin addiction, not to mention the hundreds of pounds she would spend on alcohol drinking away her fears every day.
So here she was at 11pm on a Thursday night, Drinking in Gothica Star, the local fetish bar. She liked it here because it was insanely private. You could go in and leave drunk and no one would even claim to seeing you if you lay dead in someone's ditch. And that suited her fine.
A man sat down beside her, she glanced over, hoping for someone to buy her a drink. This man seemed familiar though, now who was he, her drunken mind thought.
"What the effin hell are you staring at?" he sneered, swigging from his pint of Guinness. That voice, she knew it so well, that snaky cold tone. Yep, it was him alright.
"Hello Professor Snape." She said almost incoherently, obviously drunk.
The name hit him hard. He hadn't been called Professor in a long time. Ever since he was kicked out of teaching at Hogwarts. He looked at her..hmm..20 ish..he thought…so must have been one of my potions students, around the time of Potter. That name made him spit inwards.
"who are you?" he settled on , sobering up a little.
"Hermione. Sir" she said, never stopping to loose the formal Sir from her tone.
He laughed, always the good, perfect student. Know-it-all, the name suited her so well.
"What the hell are you doing in a place like this?'' He asked.
"where else would take a mudblood like me." She stated bitterly, lighting a joint.
He frowned at her but did not say anything. He did not think it was wise. Obviously he wasn't the only one who had sunk low for a form of escape from the war.
"Whatever happened to you, Miss Granger?" he asked cautiously, as if she was a ticking bomb.
"One night, I realised that I was not the person everyone wanted me to be. I was a holy lovely perfect child, and I hated it, I wanted to prove that maybe Hermione Granger could be someone new, could stand up on her own two feet. I guess I just wasn't ready. Professor. I hate Harry Potter. He has damaged me so much without realising it. I always had to stand in his shadow, while he got all the glory." She said quickly, muttering.
"stop calling me Professor, or Sir. Your not a child anymore, besides you don't dress like a child." He said pointing to her micro mini skirt. To be honest, he couldn't look at her without thinking of the little bushy haired girl that had been in his class all those years.
"Are you calling me a slut! I'd have you know, Snape, I've never slept with anyone in my entire life." she asked, tears falling from her eyes.
For the life of him he didn't know why he did the next thing that he did, he put his arm around her. He had never done that in his life before. "I didn't mean that", he said , "I just meant, well, you don't dress like you did when you were 17. I think you look rather pretty." He said then looked the other way, realising that he just complimented her.
She nodded. Slightly amazed and aware that he complimented her. "Another drink?" she asked him. He shook his head.
"Ok, I'll just have an orange juice. Ice and lemon slice please" She said to the bartender.
He pushed her drink to her and went back to the other side of the bar.
"Whats going on in the magical world then?" she asked.
"Nothing, not a damn thing, that's what worries me. 10 years and the world hasn't progressed at all.
Dumbledore kicked me out of the order. Apparently Potter told him I was relaying info to the Dark Lord about him. So now I just work for Voldemort. "
Hermione nodded. Death and evil did not worry her these days. They went hand in hand with her daily life.
"hmm..full time death eater.. very interesting career move." Hermione said.
"Their recruiting now, they lost so many members during the war. Voldemort isn't even evil so much now; he's gone a tad soft really. Although when he gets followers again he'll go back to being the evil man we all love to hate." Severus said plainly. He did not fear torture anymore now he could freely let Voldemort invade his mind without fear of him finding something about the order.
"I want to join." She said looking at him.
Ok that's it for now, ill update more soon, review if you like or just review with a couple of pointers, anyone want to beta?