Nobody ever has to know
Hermione stared grimly down into the cauldron of softly bubbling green grey potion, which had the look and smell of a marshland bog. The polyjuice potion had been brewing at the bottom of Hermione's bed for a little over a month, and it was now (if her memory was correct) ready for the final ingredient. The first time she had made this potion she had been a curious second year, but that time around the matter had been entirely different. This time, she was going to use the potion to masquerade as a male student.
Three months before, the horribly familiar sound of Filch's ladder scraping across the stone flags had greeted Ron, Harry and Hermione as they headed down the stairs from transfiguration for dinner. There was already a small crowd gathered around the teetering Filch, who in the process of putting up yet another decree from Headmistress Umbridge. The hall seemed unusually cold without the usual paintings hung up against the walls and Hermione was eager to move into the warmly lit hall before Ron caught her arm. "What?" she huffed at him, but in response he only pointed upwards. There, on the wall, was the new decree:
'No. 31, Boys and Girls are not permitted to be within 8 inches of each other'
You could almost hear Professor Umbridge's repulsing voice when you read it.
The idea itself was quite simple, really. It seemed the obvious solution; Hermione would become a boy, briefly, until the rule was overturned and that way she could still spend time with Harry and Ron. She did mention the possibility that Ron and Harry could take the potion to become girls instead, but the looks on their faces quickly vanished away that idea.
"It's only for a little while" she told herself, looking down into the mud-like squelching potion.
Carefully, she pulled a small plastic pouch from a pocket in her robe containing a lock of fine brown hair. A set of neatly folded boys clothes lay next to her and Angelina Johnston stood at the door, keeping an eye out. It was surprising really how many of the girls had wanted to help, considering how much trouble they'd all get into if they were caught. However the universal loathing of Umbridge prevailed and Angelina, Katie, and Ginny had sworn to do whatever they could.
The hairs had come from a boy that lived next door to her home, called Richard Nauss. She'd seen a little of him when she was younger, but now couldn't remember his face as clearly. She'd had to send a very apologetic letter to her parents asking for a sample, but, somehow, they'd pulled through. Carefully tipping the hairs into the cauldron Hermione began to stir immediately as the potion bubbled up and began to steam. Feeling slightly sick, Hermione dipped a goblet she'd 'borrowed' from the great hall into the sludge and pinching her nose, drank it down in one. The effect was immediate. It felt like her stomach was on fire and she was sure at any moment she'd be sick. She didn't remember it being quite as bad but then, she supposed, no one ever did.
"Hermione?"
She felt a hand on her shoulder from where she was doubled up on the floor and remembered that Angelina had probably never seen the effects of polyjuice potion before.
"I'm alright…" she murmured, but stopped short at her voice. It sounded deeper, not like hers at all.
Her throat was tight and painful and she had the strangest prickling sensation all over her scalp. Angelina's hand had drifted from her shoulder and Hermione turned to see her face had turned blank.
Stumbling to her feet (which definitely looked larger) Hermione willed herself over to the full length mirror that lent against the wall. What she saw was not her. The prickling sensation was explained by her hair growing backwards into her head and changing in color and texture to a short, dark auburn cut over a squared face. Richards low, thick eyebrows overcast deep set eyes and thin line of a mouth. His form reminded her of harry's; gangling and stretched out. She stared in disbelief for a few moments as Angelina came to hover behind her. ..She didn't remember Richard being quite that attractive.
Catching herself, Hermione quickly looked away from the glass and turned awkwardly, glancing at Angelina.
"Erm…"
Angelina's arms hung limply by her sides, though a furrow had set between her eyes and she opened her mouth to speak, before saying nothing. Hermione edged around her and reached gratefully for the boys set of clothes.
"You just… I can't believe it's you" she heard Angelina say behind her as she pulled on her trousers.
She found she seemed to have twice as much body hair as before as well.
"Well… It isn't me" she said without looking at Angelina as Ginny burst into the room.
Ginny looked at Hermione, looked at the goblet and still steaming cauldron on the floor, looked at Angelina's flushed expression, and worked it out.
"Merlin's beard.." she managed after a few moments.
Having gotten dressed in robes that now fitted her remarkably well, Hermione sighed slowly. Despite the uncomfortable silence that filled the room, something about the whole thing thrilled her. Maybe it was the fact she really was going against the rules in the most outlandish way conceivable. Maybe (but only a little, if so) it was that she looked good. Really, really good.
"Shall we go show everyone?" Ginny grinned at her, and held back the curtain to the common room staircase. Hermione glanced at Angelina, but Angelina was looking at the window, as if she didn't quite want to look into the room. At her. Something caught unpleasantly at the back of Hermione's mind, though she told herself it was quite reasonable. She knew this was weird for her, as for any of them, but the feeling still didn't quite go away as she approached the stairs.
Two steps onto the staircase and Angelina was swiftly flung from her mind as the floor gave way beneath her. They'd forgotten about the security slide and of course… the staircase now recognized her as a boy.
"Hermione!" Ginny yelled as Hermione was tumbling down the slide to land in a crumpled heap on the common room carpet.
There was a moment of stunned silence, before the common room erupted into cheers. Hermione was hoisted to her feet by the Weasley twins who grinned into her face as they escorted her firmly into the laughing and whooping crowd.
"'Ello Hermione!"
"Nice Hair cut!"
It seemed all of Gryffindor was in on the prank. Hermione turned worriedly to Ginny, who had appeared after her, slowly followed by Angelina who was hanging back and melting into the crowds.
"Ginny, do you think this is a good idea? I mean, can everyone here keep the secret from…"
She was interrupted as Fred and George released her in front of Harry and Ron, who weren't perhaps quite as amused as everyone around them, but smiling none the less.
"Feeling alright 'mione?" Ron asked clapping her over the back.
"It's Richard now, Ron" she reminded him crossly, but smiled at him just in case. He looked a little pale.
"Blimey" he murmured "You're a lot more.. different than I thought you would be"
"Well I can still help you with your homework so don't worry" she huffed back.
Ron looked her up and down a couple of times and eventually cracked a smile. Harry joined him.
"Thanks, Hermione" he smiled "We know you're doing this for us. Well, and yourself, I suppose."
The rest of the common room had died down into an excited murmuring and a few people had begun to turn away to carry on with what they were doing.
"Thanks" Hermione smiled back. Everything felt so weird, but the familiar queasy feeling at least had begun to subside. "What lesson do we have now?"
Harry and Ron looked at each other "Defense against the dark arts…"
"Oh crumbs.." Hermione breathed
"Hermione, relax" Ron hooked his arm around her shoulder as Harry joined her other side and they began to march towards the entrance "It'll go fine"
"I guess we won't know till we try…"