Sometimes the darkness just wanted to consume him. And each time the shadowed tendrils threatened to seep over his mind, he had to remind himself that he was no longer a child. He was no longer a small boy who could depend on others. He only had himself.
Not long after Misha became an angel, Kotaro's father died in a plane crash, leaving him alone. And now the memories of his life flashed before him; his mother, blood running down her elegant fingers, Misha wrapped tightly in his embrace, her warm forehead under his lips, to his father, a white cloth draped over his face, the last memory Kotaro having of him being more than unpleasant. He still remembered the exact words the man had spat at him before closing the door.
"Do you think you can surround yourself in the plain void of fake contentment and pretend the past never happened?"
Kotaro grit his teeth and ducked into an alleyway, where he promptly vented his inner turmoil. He kicked the old cracked bricks, and punched the walls until his knuckles were split and bloody, but nothing made his anger lessen. So he did the only thing he could.
He cried.
He kicked the bricks one last time and slammed the side of his fist into the ridges, sliding pitifully to the ground. Kotaro cried for the first time in six years. The guilt for not even missing his own father, the pain of losing the woman he loved, and the loneliness of his mother not being there came out in heaving sobs, and all the while he never noticed the eyes watching him.
"The night's too lovely for rain, don't you think?"
Kotaro didn't even look up.
"It's not raining," he said gruffly, running his long fingers through his hair. He heard footsteps, and then saw two tiny feet laden in leather boots stop just before his dirty red converse.
"Yes it is," the voice said, and Kotaro looked up to see a young woman bending over him. She had a kind and mysterious face, and her long hair masked her right eye.
"It's raining so hard you can't even see the stars in your sky," she said gently, reaching out to hand him a tissue.
Kotaro took it gratefully, but he was still confused as to what she was saying. It seemed that his feelings were shown on his face, because she sat beside him and elaborated.
"Everyone has their own sky," she said. "And no two skies are exactly the same. There may be similarities, or even the same shade of blue, but each one is carefully crafted to suit each person. Each sky has the same elements, too. A sun, a moon, the clouds and the stars. The sun and the moon keep the balance between each feeling in each life. Sometimes, though, the sun falls, and is no longer seen. All that is left is night. When this happens, many were so blinded by the light, that when it was no longer there they couldn't see the stars."
"The stars?" he inquired. Nothing was really making sense to him, but this girl seemed to really believe in this "sky" fallacy.
"Yes, because even at night, there is still light. It may not be as bright as the sun, but it's still there. And the light is the good things you have. And the only light at night is the moon and the stars. So when your sun falls you need to open your eyes and see the stars, because if you don't, the darkness will consume you until you can no longer function."
"I'm still not following. What the hell is with all of this sky and star crap?" Kotaro grumbled and the woman sighed.
"Your sun has fallen- the thing that made you the happiest. Now, you need to open your eyes and see all of the stars in your sky. See all of the good things in your life. And even when it rains, or the weather is stormy, you have to remember that the stars are always there, even if you can't see them. Believe in your stars and put faith in your sky."
Kotaro thought this over, he thought about his "stars" and even his so called "sun", until he realized she was right. His past anger fled, and he remembered what good he had.
"Thank-" but he trailed off as he looked up. The mysterious girl with ebony hair and a flowing dress like darkness itself was gone.
"At least tell me your name!" he called to the starry sky.
And as he left the dark alleyway and headed home, he heard the wind softly whisper,
"Shinjiru…"
Hehe... this is a tad bit embarrassing. All this philosophical and emotional mush... R&R