Project Delta
She was not born into a normal life. She had no father to protect her, no mother to nurture her, no home to feel safe in, and no real chance at a future. Born in a lab, she was to be part of an experiment meant to change humanity into something new, to raise them to a new level of biological glory. Pain was her constant companion and suffering her faithful teacher. As a child she was nothing but a number, fated only to die for scraps of useful knowledge and perhaps improve another number's chances… but fate is fickle. A beast grows within her soul, and when it breaks free the reaper himself will struggle to keep up.
Chapter 1 - The Early years
Entry : 0
Date : 5.1.2154
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
This shall be my first entry detailing Project Delta, the apex of my career. Our organization has long been dedicated to the advancement and improvement of humanity. With this project, we shall ensure humanity's dominion over all that dwell in this galaxy.
The purpose of Project Delta is to change humanity. Change it into something better. We shall achieve this via extremely advanced bio-implants developed in our most secure lab. We don't fully understand where the base materials came from but the prevailing hypothesis is that they were developed by the protheans as a means of evolving beyond their own physical limitations. Now, we shall use them to build our own future.
Using animal trials we have determined to optimal placement of each different implant, of which there are 7 distinct units. Every system of the body shall be augmented. By the time the implantation process is complete, the subjects will be stronger, faster, more durable, more intelligent, and well… pretty much better in almost every way. There are likely to be a number of deviant cases but with 500 hundred subjects I don't think having to liquidate a few dozen will matter.
It will not be a bloodless process. Casualties have to be expected. However, I'm sure that once we produce the results I expect, any fatalities can be forgiven. After all, most of the subjects have no families. Most aren't technically citizens of the Alliance. A few were even born here from a few 'volunteers'. No one will miss a few orphans with no ties to the outside world.
We have been allocated significant resources, a secure facility, numerous test subjects, and a guarantee that the Systems Alliance and the soon to be introduced and pathetic Citadel Council will be completely unaware. With our current situation I estimate significant results within a single decade.
The subjects have already begun arriving. All will be here by the end of the week. 500 infants ready for implantation. This the beginning of a new age.
Entry : 1
Date : 5.8.2154
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
Every subject has arrived and received their inspection. We are ready to begin the implantation process. I am nearly breathless with anticipation. Our first move is to install the cerebral implant. The optimal placement with our simian test units was just above the cerebellum. I am confident this will remain so with our human subjects.
The cerebral implant should take only a few weeks to spread throughout each subject's brain. This first implant will smooth the development for all future units. We must be careful during implantation. The human brain is a fragile thing, and an infant's even more so.
This first step is the most important, and will likely be the most damaging. Animal trials had almost 2% fatalities in this first stage. An acceptable if annoying possibility. I will be quite busy in this early stage and will not make a new log until it is complete. I refuse to miss a moment.
There is pain. The tiny mind knows little but that. There is pain. She doesn't know what she is, where she is, or who she is. All she knows is pain. She screams as all infants do, but no mother comes to comfort her. No father seeks to cast away the cause of the pain. She doesn't understand anything she hears or sees. She is too young. There is only pain, pain, pain. Why does everything hurt?
Entry : 2
Date : 7.3.2154
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
I must admit I am somewhat perturbed by the price of the very first stage of the experiment. Of the 500 subjects implanted, 37 died within an hour of surgery. A further 43 in the following 7 weeks. 80 subjects, a full 16% of our stock. I am unhappy with this cost but shall continue regardless.
The remaining 420 subjects are developing fairly well with only a few exceptions. Numbers 113 and 299 are proving to be quite weak and will likely perish before the second procedure even begins. 486, 047, 309, and 322 are showing signs of extreme cerebral deformation and shall be liquidated. We need not waste further resources on such obvious failures. The only questionable case that I think is even remotely salvageable is 027. She shows signs of implant rejection but I think we'll keep her for now. I think it will be useful to monitor the rejection process. Perhaps we'll learn something to boost the chances of the others.
Other than the less than stellar survival rate so far, I believe that we are more than ready to move to stage 2. Next comes the spinal implant with shall be placed and the base of the C1 Atlas. Over the course of 2 more months it shall spread throughout the spinal column, providing reinforcement and improving stability.
A number of staff members have expressed disquiet over continuing. I've done my best to allay their fears. This isn't about a few meaningless lives. It's about humanity's destiny within a harsh and uncaring galaxy. Most seemed to settle down and those that were not placated have been sent away. We will continue immediately. I eagerly await news for the next log entry.
The pain barely lets her sleep. Her back is but a line of fire, scorching her at all times. She continues to cry for help, for a caregiver, but none come to her aid. Why won't it stop? The large ones, the ones in white and green do nothing to stop the hurting. They feed her. Clean her. Cut her. Hurt her. BUT WHY? There is pain and they won't help her. They won't help.
Entry : 3
Date : 10.9.2154
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
Far better news this time around. With only 6 fatalities, stage 2 is complete. Many subjects are already displaying advanced motor skills. 099 and 222 are walking unaided. This rapid development can only be from the implants. The subjects are growing faster than we thought possible.
One small problem we've discovered is that the subjects seem to have developed a bizarrely powerful tolerance for the sedatives we've been using. The dosage required to keep them sedated is borderline fatal. Therefor we will have to forego the use of sedatives in the future and simply hope for the best. This decision was met with vehement anger among the majority of the staff. Accusations of unnecessary cruelty and outright maliciousness were thrown about. When I refused to reverse my command, fully half the staff resigned. I have requested that my next batch of help be of a more pragmatic temperament.
He contacted me for a report 2 days ago. He seemed quite happy with the results thus far until I told him of the casualties. He is well prepared to accept some deaths but I shall have to refrain from revealing the full cost until we have significant results. At the moment he believes we have only lost 20 subjects rather than the 86 we actually have. I don't have any real room to maneuver on the subject. I shall just have to be more circumspect.
Our next step is the ocular implant. This implant shall in fact completely replace the eye. Once fully grown, they shall provide the subjects with vastly superior eyesight. Casualties should be quite light for this particular step.
One item of rather surprising news is the continued survival of subject 027. Though she still shows some signs of rejection, the fact that she is still alive is quite impressive. I shall have to keep an eye on her.
The pain only gets worse. Where before she would wake to new pain, now the large ones hurt her while she is awake. She loses sight for a time and in the deep dark without sight her eyes are but globes of agony boring into her tiny skull. When sight comes back everything is painfully bright. She sees colors where before there were none. A new light assault her eyes. One of the large one shines it in her face and makes noises of surprise at what it sees. This large one is always looking. She knows nothing else of it other than the fact that it is always watching when she feels new pain.
Entry : 4
Date : 1.2.2155
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
As expected, there were no fatalities for this most recent stage. A few close calls certainly, but no deaths. This seems to have earned me some favor with Him. I shall strive to preserve this good fortune.
Despite the excellent news of survival for all subjects a new problem has arisen. Due to the lack of sedative being used each subject is fully awake for the procedures. This has lead to a difficult situation among the staff. Hurting the subjects for the sake of advancement isn't a problem. It's the screams that are a problem. Many staffers have resigned, claiming that the screaming haunts them in their dreams. One young man even had a mental breakdown and had to be carried away. I have ordered the surgical bays be completely soundproofed. Hopefully this will help solve the problem.
The implants themselves have developed nicely. Most have taken the appearance of natural human eyes with only a few small anomalies marking them out as abnormal. The one notable exception is little 027. Her implants not only appear completely different, containing no fewer than 5 distinct rings of material outside her pupils, but they also shine a startlingly luminescent violet. Despite this her new eyes seem to function perfectly, despite a somewhat unnerving decrease in blinking. Also all signs of rejection have disappeared completely. She is now one of the healthiest subjects. This little one has certainly captured my interest.
Our next step should go well. The next implant is actually a series of bio nodes to be implanted in the marrow of the subjects' long bones. While the procedure will undoubtedly be unpleasant we must push forward. This implant will take far longer than the last three. I'm optimistic about what's to come
'It hurts' she thinks to herself, 'Why can't I stop hurting'. Her arms and legs feel like grinding glass. They are getting longer and stronger, but even lying perfectly still she still feels the endless pain in her very bones.
The large ones still won't make the pain stop. The one that's always there for new pain keeps talking to her but she barely can hear through the roaring in her veins as the pain keeps her weak.
"Well 027, how are we today?" Why does he ask this? What does he want? "I'm glad to say you're doing quite well. You're bones are forming nicely and your new bits inside are beginning to mesh. I think you'll be with us for a while yet." Why won't he help her?!
'Please make me stop hurting!' The voice in her head sobs as he turns to walk away. But no sound comes out. She just stares at him through her tears as he again leaves her alone to her pain. 'Please… just make it stop….'
Entry : 5
Date : 10.30.2155
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
It seems the universe delights in making me regret my words. The last 10 months have been utter hell. A further 32 subjects perished during the most recent implantation. If that wasn't enough we had an information leak and were forced to relocate. 13 more subjects died during transport. The remaining 369 are doing well despite this near incessant pain they're experiencing. We can't use painkillers though. I've learned that the medicines we use to suppress pain also severely slow the growth of the implants. The subjects will simply have to learn to live with it.
Again, more interesting news in regards to 027. Her implants have grown in perfectly and are working together more smoothly than any other subject. She certainly seems to have a guardian angel watching her. Her bones, while still growing, are already stronger than a fully grown adult. Her white blood cells are fascinating. They are actually creating small nodes outside her bones that in turn generate a new kind of cell. These new cells flow through the blood like platelets, but instead of clotting wounds, they actually form active defensive points. We exposed some of these cells to samples of various viral and bacterial agents. They dissolved every infectious agents they encountered. One day we may be able to turn this into a new form of antiseptic, if we can first solve the problem of their extreme toxicity first. These cells tend to kill anything outside the host body.
The other subjects are all progressing well. Some are almost as promising as 027. We shall have to wait and see as the next implant will be challenging. It is a subdermal implant which will spread through the subject's entire dermal layer. This implant is the slowest growing and will almost certainly lead to some loses. I can only hope for smoother sailing from here on, but I won't hold my breath.
The pain now includes a hideous itch that never goes away no matter how much she scratches her skin. It feels like something slithers just beneath the surface in an endless crawling ache that robs her of what little peace she had found in sleep. The food that made the painful itch weaker doesn't come anymore.
She can hear screams from beyond her door. They sound like her own. Desperate cries of pain, destined to be ignored like any other plea for help she hears. She knows there are others like her. Others trapped in agony that never, ever stops. She often sees them being dragged between rooms, by the tall ones. They suffer as she does. 'Why are they hurting us?' It is a never ending refrain in her mind. What little sleep she manages to steal is always haunted by the quiet sobs of those like her, echoing through the halls.
The tall one who brings the pain won't leave her alone. Always asking questions, wanting her to answer, demanding to know why she won't answer. When she doesn't he takes her to different rooms and sticks plugs on her head and throat and needles into her skin. Then he makes sounds of interest and confusion before taking her to new labs.
He makes cuts on her skin and watches as it heals. The tall ones take fluid from inside her arms and puts them in tubes. She doesn't know why. When the pain bringer tells her he uses words she can't understand like 'anti-septic' and 'coagulant'.
The only comfort she has is her hair. It goes down to her shoulder in a tangled mess, but it's soft and she loves the color. She often holds strands tight in her fists just to have something else to focus on besides the pain. It helps make her feel better. Not by much, but a little is better than none.
Sometimes the pain is too much to hold inside so she shrieks at her walls for hours, venting a wild, feral anger that eats away at her heart. When she finally collapses from exhaustion she curls in a corner and silently begs for something to change, for a chance to go to sleep just one time without hurting, to eat without razors tearing in her stomach. She's so tired...
Entry : 6
Date : 6.22.2157
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
Two years. Two fucking years! Intellectually I knew that this stage would take longer but I never really braced myself for just how bitter this time would be.
Another 37 subjects have died. The first fifteen died during implantation. The remaining 22 from implant rejection over the first 3 weeks. Despite my calm thus far I must admit that the… the sight of these rejections was very, very… disturbing. Never did I think flesh would simply peel free from a living creature in such a terrifying manner.
This has proven to be a breaking point for so many staff members that He felt the need to contact me and demand answers. So many have left not only the project but our organization in its entirety. I did my best to assure him that it was simply the stress of spending so long in seclusion. Not to mention the nature of the experiments themselves. I'm still not entirely sure if I convinced him, but he seemed to mollified for now. I have my own doubts at this point but I refuse to give in.
The sole point of good fortune in this most recent stage is 027. She becomes more remarkable with each step. Her implant has spread throughout her dermal layer flawlessly. She has become resistance to cuts from most common sources of damage. Her physical appearance is surprisingly different than her fellow subjects. Most have a mid tone complexion quite common in modern man. Her skin has taken on a quite pale color with a small number of freckles dotting her face. Her hair has shifted from its original brown to a deep, almost crimson shade.
Her behavior is also odd compared to her peers. While most of the other exhibit many common characteristics of children their age, she is almost completely different. Where others are somewhat mischievous and constantly seeking to ask questions (mostly when the pain will stop) she never speaks. We know she can understand us. We've used numerous mental tests to be sure, but she doesn't talk. I have performed a thorough examination to find the problem. The result… nothing. There are no flaws in her vocal cords and no abnormal brain deformations. She simply chooses to not talk. That's not to say she is completely silent. She still makes sounds to indicate amusement (rarely but still), hunger, fear, and anger. 027 just doesn't communicate through words. I intend to engage her in a number of more focused exercises to try and encourage her to 'find her voice' as it were.
Our next step, given our retched luck thus far, will likely be costly. The 6th implant will be installed in 4 pieces, 1 for each chamber of the heart. Once installed it shall begin to spread throughout the entirety of the subject's' circulatory systems. I don't know how long this implant will take to reach maturity. Simian testing revealed wildly differing growth times, all the way from 6 weeks to 18 months. No 2 subjects had the same duration so we'll have to see how it goes. I pray for a turn in our luck.
She clutches at her chest, at the ache inside that makes her feel so weak. They put something in her chest, she watched them do it. Now she feels like there are bugs crawling in her chest. The blood pounds in her ears and she always hears her heartbeat.
Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump.
Her head burns inside. She thinks to fast sometimes and forgets what she's doing while she starts trying to do something else. She thinks faster than she can move. 'WHY IS EVERYTHING SO SLOW?!' Every sound is a blast of mind shredding noise that leaves her dazed. She doesn't get sick anymore, but she would gladly take that back if she could just stop hearing her heart at night.
Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump.
The tall ones and the others like her are disappearing. The screams are much louder for a while and then they just start going quiet. This is more terrifying than anything else. She had gotten used to those sounds. With them gone she wonders if her own screaming will stop. What will that mean? Will the pain go away? Or will it get so bad she can't even cry out.
Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump.
Her fear keeps her in a corner of her cell, crying quietly, trying not to bring the attention of whatever is making the sounds disappear. The only sound that just gets louder and louder and louder is that of her own heart.
Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump, Thump-thump.
Entry : 7
Date : 4.17.2160
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
…
…
…
As of the 17th of April, 2160, Project Delta consists of only 5 subjects. Their numbers are 003, 190, 486, 250, and (thankfully) 027. The remaining 327 subjects have all perished. The sounds they made… I… I don't know if I can keep doing this. I always thought… I thought maybe a few dozen, a hundred at most, but 495, 99 percent! I doubt HE will forgive this even if the remaining 5 subjects are true successes.
My staff has been almost entirely replaced with VI controlled robots. They kept complaining about the screaming, the endless pleas for help or anything to make the pain stop. I just can't take the whining any more. I'm already having trouble keeping myself together after seeing what happened to the most recent fatalities. Skin splitting along major veins and arteries, blood pouring from ears and noses, some of them simply drowning in their own blood as their lungs were torn apart by failed implant growth. So much blood. It will be better with less noise, yes, less noise.
Subjects 003, 190, 486, and 250 are all developing as expected. They are maturing faster than a normal human and I predict full physical development by age 13. Again 027 is the anomaly. She likely won't reach physical maturity until 17 perhaps even later. While she is growing much slower than the others, her implants are perfectly formed and her body is stronger than we thought possible . She hasn't suffered any kind of sickness in more than 3 years. Her mind processes information at a rate seldom seen even in genius level intellects. Her reaction times thus far are nearly 22% quicker than the human average. While these results are quite impressive we will need to wait until the final implant is installed and mature before the real testing can begin.
The only observable problem for our little 027 is pain. Despite the beautifully healed scars and perfectly grafted implants, she seems to be suffering widespread pain almost constantly. This has resulted in an aversion to almost any physical contact as that seems to exacerbate her suffering. There have been a number of times that I have observed her trembling in the corner of her cell, desperately pawing at her forehead or extremities whilst emitted a mewling sound one could easily associate with a wounded animal. While we can find no source for this widespread pain, our scans have indicated that the portions of her brain responsible for the processing of pain are almost constantly active. In truth, I wish I could ease her suffering but we've come too far to be held back by the weeping of children.
I shall need to maintain close observation of all subjects for the final stage of implantation. The muscular implant must be inserted bit by bit into each of the major muscle groups. This will likely be the most torturous stage for the subjects, but each of them has shown how durable they are. They'll make it. They. Will. Make. It. I… hope they make it.
She has so much energy it makes her tremble at all hours. She wants to run, to jump, to climb, to fight, anything to spend energy and be tired again. She is stronger than before. One of the new tall ones tried to take her food away. She hit it hard enough to break its chest open. It's not like her chest, because she didn't see any blood or even a heart for that matter.
The other ones like her are with her now. They talk but she still doesn't. When they cry it makes her heart hurt so she tries to make them stop. She hugs them and they are quieter. She even shares her food so they feel better. She is hungrier but helping them makes the pain more quiet.
The screams are gone but now she has the new sounds the others make to keep her company. She doesn't feel like crying as much anymore. Her new friends, her first friends, help make the ache in her chest go away.
Entry : 8
Date : 6.28.2160
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
So far the final stage of implantation is going well. All five subjects are still alive and the new implant nodes are steadily growing. Each seems to be adapting well, even though they all seem to be suffering for the same widespread pain that 027 has been enduring. They cry so much. They won't stop. Even 027 weeps every now and then. Why?! She, of all of them, should be used to it by now. No matter. We continue.
I've decided to keep them all together for the remainder of the implantation process. This seems to ease some of their suffering. Each able to provide some measure of comfort to others by way of their shared suffering. Surprisingly the most nurturing of all is 027. When the others cry uncontrollably, she stills her own sobs to hold them close despite the obvious pain it causes her. She still doesn't speak but just being around her seems to calm the others. She even gives most of her food to the others just to make them feel better. She becomes more fascinating every day.
One of her friends is sick. He can't stand up anymore. He barely eats. She holds him close so he knows she's there because he cries when she isn't. Her other friends are too afraid to come close but she can't leave him alone. She makes sounds to him. Sounds that always made her feel better but he almost never seems to hear. Is he going to stop making sounds? Is he going to disappear too?
Entry : 9
Date : 8.11.2160
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
A disturbing turn. 003 has become violently ill. His tests show widespread destabilization of each implant matrix. If this continues the result will be complete rejection, at which point his body will literally tear itself apart. I desperately hope this isn't a sign of what's to come for the others. Especially 027.
Most of the others try to avoid 003 now, as if they fear being close will somehow spread his condition. But not 027. She continues to surprise. She spends nearly every waking hour by 003's side. He stops crying while she is near. She still doesn't talk. Instead she simply holds his hands and hums a mindless tune that seems to comfort him for some reason.
I shall continue to observe and pray for a swift recovery.
Entry : 10
Date : 9.9.2160
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
003 has taken a turn for the worst. It's as I feared, widespread rejection. His implants are already beginning to break him. 027 continues to stay with him, humming her little tune. She simply holds his hand and cries with him.
The others are beginning to show signs of illness as well. I… don't know what to do. What the fuck am I supposed to do?!
She can't stop crying. They are all sick now and their sounds are growing quieter. The boy who got sick first isn't moving anymore. He's barely breathing and she doesn't know how to help.
She spends days trying to make her special sounds to make him happy but she doesn't know if he hears anymore. She knows he's going to stop make sound soon. She doesn't want him to hurt anymore. There is a sharp piece of metal in the room. She stole it from one of the tall ones. They used it to cut her to put things inside. She thinks she knows how to make his pain stop, but she knowing his sounds will stop too. He is hurting so much and she doesn't know what else to do.
Entry : 10
Date : 9.15.2160
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
She… she killed him. I have no idea where the knife came from. She held him close. Hummed her little song until he fell asleep. Then she drove the shard of metal through the base of his skull, tearing through his palette and impaling his brain. Scans indicate near instant death. How did she know to strike in such a way? When he was dead she just kept holding him for hours silently weeping. The others didn't even bat an eye at his death, though in truth they aren't really in a position to do so. All remaining subjects except 027 are showing signs of rejection.
I am almost certain that Project Delta will soon end, and with it my own life. I shall stay with them until they pass. When this cruel joke spreads to 027 I will reveal all to Him and then I'll end myself.
She doesn't know how long she held him for after she made him quiet. All she knows is that he is gone and her other friends are becoming just like he was. She has to make the all quiet. They won't hurt anymore. She'll be alone but at least they won't suffer like her anymore.
Entry : 11
Date : 11.4.2160
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
Subject 190 - deceased
cause of death -
single stab through the base of skull with surgical knife, death was instantaneous
Subject 486- deceased
cause of death -
single stab through the base of skull with surgical knife, death was instantaneous
Subject 250- deceased
cause of death -
single stab through the base of skull with surgical knife, death was instantaneous
She's all that's left. 499 dead, 4 by her own hand. She simply lays in the corner of her cell now, nothing but the sounds of depthless sorrow coming from her. She shows no sign of illness, nor even the slightest hint of implant rejection. It will still take a few more procedures to finish the process but it looks like she will succeed where all others have fallen.
Alone...alone...alone. It's so quiet. No screams, no shouts, no pleas for help. Only the sound of her own sobbing keeps her company now. She holds her knees to her chest and begs in her head for her friends to forgive her.
She's not sick like they were. She isn't becoming quiet and that just makes her feel worse. She thinks about making herself quiet like the others but she's too afraid.
Entry : 12
Date : 4.11.2161
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
I don't know what to say. 027 is a success. Implantation is complete and everything looks fine. All we had to do was trample a pile of dead children, and inflict endless, searing agony and now we have a successful subject. For what it's worth we can now proceed to phase 2.
I can't tell Him the true cost. I've been lying for years. I might as well continue. I'll send word for enough materials to move 420 subjects. He still believes there are that many survivors. I'll need to eliminate the few remaining staff members. The VI's will handle the labor, both for moving material and disposing of the bodies.
We'll be moving into a new facility in the terminus for Phase 2. It's currently under construction on some station that is evidently outside even Council jurisdiction. Even should some damn fool learn what we are doing there'll be nothing anyone can do. So long as we leave the station's ruling faction in peace, we'll apparently be left in peace.
I shall see this through to the end, not matter what may come. And when all's said and done I shall gladly pay whatever price there is to pay.
The tall ones take her from her cell and put her in a pod. She sleeps for a while and awakens in a new place. Everything is different. Her cell in bigger, more open, and has much more in it. She doesn't know what to think. All she knows is that it's still quite and she hates it.
Entry : 13
Date : 5.17.2161
Entrant : Dr. N. Orsen
We have arrived at our new facility. It is marvelous. It contains everything we need to move forward. There are cells for hundreds of subjects, which will now be used instead for various experiments. We have numerous gymnasia for physical training. Our medical and technical labs are state of the art and I shall delight in putting them to use.
I wish I had something positive to say for the station itself. In truth it's quite the repulsive den of swine. Slums, drugs, gangs, whores, repulsive aliens everywhere, seedy clubs, and enough murder and mayhem to make even the megalopolises of Earth look positively homey. I'll not spend much time outside the lab, in fact, none if I can help it. We won't be letting 027 out there. We have too much to do.
Omega… what shithole.
027 had little reaction to the new surroundings. She is still in widespread pain and avoids contact as much as possible. I've ordered 4 cells to be combined into one large room for her. She deserves that much at least. The next few years will not be easy for her. She will have to suffer more than ever before, but I'll be there to watch over her.
All alone in her big new room, she spends a lot of time just laying down trying not to think of her friends. It takes her some time to actually start examining her surroundings. She has a soft bed, a bathroom of her own, books, and more food than ever.
Eventually she finds something she's never seen before. A big glass panel mounted in one corner of her room. In it she sees an image, an image that follows her. Eventually she realizes that she is seeing herself. She spends hours looking at herself in her mirror.
The pain-bringer eventually comes in and sees her staring at herself. He talks for many minutes about 'reflection' and how 'light bounces'. She doesn't hear any of it. She can't stop staring and the girl in the mirror. She is shorter than she thought. She sees her red hair running to her shoulders in tangled mess and is happy for a moment. Eventually he stops trying to talk to her and leaves her alone with her reflection.
She looks into the glowing violet eyes for nearly an hour and then something suddenly snaps inside. All the pain, sorrow, and hate start pouring out in an unending stream of shrieks and growls. She leaps at her reflection and begins slamming her fists against the glass. It hurts more that anything she's ever felt but when the glass cracks she goes wild. Pounding harder and harder, pieces of glass begin to scatter about. Some of fall on top of her, grazing her skin. Most simple bounce off but some slide along just right and slice open her arms, shoulders, and face.
There is now blood being flung across the walls, the floor, and all over her. The blood just drivers her further. When the mirror finally shatters completely she turns her rage on anything else she can find. She shreds the bed covering and tears pieces off its frame. Swing a piece of a metal bar from the frame, she sets about smashing everything she can reach. She can't stop, can't think. All she knows is the pain all over and the endless screaming in her head. She hates everything she sees.
Eventually some of the tall ones come in to stop her. She hates them, hates them, HATES THEM. They are the new focus for her rampage. The first one doesn't understand the danger. He demands she stop and stomps forward to try and restrain her. He never really knew what happened. She hit so hard, so fast, his skull caved in with a spray of blood and brain matter. His body fell forward in a nerveless heap. The second simply stands there in terror as this little girl leaps at her next. The metal bar again sings through the air. This time in a horizontal swing that catches the woman in the throat. The tall one collapses to the ground, her head resting at a disturbing angle.
The third one is ready for her. He attacks with his own metal stick and knocks hers away. He pull back his arm for another swing. Before he can even think of bringing it down she leaps onto his chest and clamps her teeth down on his nose. She them proceeding to tear the ugly lump of flesh from his face in a spray of gore. She leaps off as he falls back, desperately clutching his shredded face, screaming in agony. She isn't idol. As soon as the man is on the ground, she leaps back onto his chest and grabs his collar. She then swings her head down into his. The headbutt causes an explosion of pain that nearly floors her, but she doesn't care. The tall one is still breathing. She headbutts him again, and again, and again. By the fourth strike there isn't much left of his head.
She takes up her metal stick again and begins striking each of the bodies over and over and over. There is shadow growing in the corners of her vision. Nausea is spreading and she can barely stand. A new voice sounds at the door. Rather than anger or fear she hears a voice trying to be soothing, to calm her. She tries to swing at this new target but collapses in a heap. She looks up through foggy eyes to see the pain-bringer standing over her looking down in abject horror at the scene before him. She hates him most of all. She decides that when she stops feeling so dizzy she is going to hit him until there is nothing left to hit. She will paint the walls with his blood. Her decision made, she finally allows her exhaustion to drop her into the abyss of sleep.
So there it is. The first chapter of my first fanfiction. This story shall cover Shepard's story up until ME1. I welcome feedback and will try to answer any questions