SIMPLY IRRESISTIBLE
By AussieHottieMjM

DISCLAIMER
Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't own them so please don't sue me. Plus, I have no money.

RATING
This fic is rated M for language, adult situations, and sexual situations.

SYNOPSIS
Christian finds himself wanting more in life than the constant flings. He slips into a mid-life crisis and depression.

SETTING
This fic is set between seasons one and two of Nip/Tuck.

AUTHOR'S NOTE
Wow, my first Nip/Tuck fic. My first smutty fic. I feel dirty. ;)

x x x

Christian Troy sat at his desk in his office all alone. '9 P.M.,' Christian thought as he glanced at the clock. It wasn't necessarily late, per se. But it was late to be at the office. Surgeons don't operate past 6.

Christian was absentmindedly drawing on a blank sheet of printing paper. He was a great artist, though he'd never let anyone else know.

Art was a weird thing for Christian; it was like his escape. Ever since he was a kid, he'd try to draw what he felt just to get away from what was going on in his life. It was his way of expressing himself; and at the same time, it was his way of clearing his mind of everything.

The last year had been horrible. So many things plagued his mind whenever he'd close his eyes. He'd see everything flash back before them. Those beautiful blues of his had seen so much. Though they seemed empty most of the time, they also had so much depth to him.

He traced lightly over his finished doodle. It wasn't bad at all; since he'd been drawing since he was eight, you could say he had gotten the hang of it. It was probably also a contributing factor to why he was good with his hands...

A knock at his door drew him back to reality. He raised his head only to say a too familiar face standing in the doorway.

"What are you still doing here?" she asked.

"This is my office. I can be here whenever the hell I want to," Christian snapped. "What the hell are you still doing here?"

"I work here, too."

"Yeah... well do you own the place?" He paused, as if he actually wanted her to answer. Then: "Didn't think so."

"Shut up, Christian. If you think that everything revolves around you, you need to get your thoughts straight."

He only rolled his eyes.

"Don't think you own me, Christian. Don't think that I'm attracted to you. Frankly, I think you're the dirtiest piece of shit I've ever met."

"Dr. Santiago," he paused. "If I really wanted you to be attracted to me, you'd be straddling me right now, and begging me to never stop banging you."

"Is that so?" Grace asked, though more in a tone that said 'right, like that'll happen'.

"Yes. That's so. Now if you'd excuse me, I'm doing something important here. And I need all my concentration."

"Really? You, doing something important? And it's not sex related? Pinch me; I must be dreaming." Christian smirked at her remark. "So Troy, what are you con-cock-ting now?"

Christian laughed at her pun. "And why would you give a damn, Dr. Santiago?"

She began to slowly drift toward his desk. "I don't like to think that you're up to something; and if you are, I'm afraid that it might make the world end. I've got my eye on you Christian Troy. And if you so much as—" She stopped mid-sentence. She looked down at the paper on his desk. "Did you draw that?"

Christian looked down at his desk, saw the drawing, and turned it face down. "So what if I did?"

"It's... good." Grace said it in surprise; 'I didn't know he could draw,' she thought. "Could I have that?"

The question caught Christian off-guard. He paused before answering. "Sure..." He was still hesitant, but handed her the sketch anyways. She turned abruptly and left.

Christian pulled out another piece of printing paper, and began to draw again.

x x x

Beep. Beep. Beep. Christian turned off his alarm clock. It read 6:30 A.M. He tried to recall last night.

He remembered talking to Grace, and her asking for the picture. He remembered taking out another sheet and drawing a little bit more.

Then going to a bar and... 'That's right,' he thought. He had looked over his room and found a bra strewn onto it like it was a piece of trash. 'She must've left it here thinking I'll take it back to her... yeah, right; like that'll happen,' he thought. 'Oh, what was her name again? — Dianne, Dana, Dina, Dena... Aw hell, who cares; it's not like you're gonna see her again.'

He quickly got dressed and headed to work. If he was late to surgery again, Sean was going to kill him. Well... just get pissed; but he figured he'd save the ten minutes that were to be wasted on listening to one of Sean's lectures for something else.

x x x

"You look like shit," Christian said across the scrub sinks to his partner and best friend, Sean McNamara.

"Gee, Christian, how nice of you to put it."

"What happened? – another fight with the Mrs.?"

"No, with Matt," Sean replied. "I swear, if I even breathe wrong, one of them is on my back."

"I know the feeling."

"Yeah? – how so?" Sean asked.

"Nothing; never mind," Christian replied. He was thinking back to the time he took Matt to a porn party, and how he had let him and Julia down. He remembered how Julia had yelled at him and how she had told him he would never be a good father because a real father would never do that to his son.

Ouch. That cut him deep.

Matt had always been like a son to him. He never meant to hurt anyone. Money has blinded more than just he, himself.

And it wasn't necessarily the money that blinded him. All he had wanted to do ever since he was a kid was make something out of nothing. Money was just a part of getting that. And he wanted that badly – "to be somebody", he once told Sean.

Christian was now absentmindedly tracing the surgical lines with a scalpel. 'Another day, another patient, another pair of breast implants,' he thought. Liz and Sean were saying things back and forth to each other – probably even to Christian as well – but he didn't notice. He hadn't really been himself lately.

Sure, he was still having sex every other night with every other good-looking girl, picking them up at every other bar; but he wasn't making as many sarcastic remarks. He wasn't making fun of Liz at all (which was very unusual). And he hadn't really been talking that much unless someone had made him feel deeply compelled to.

There was that occasional smartass comment, but it didn't seem like very much compared to how he used to be.

He felt himself changing. He was helping the Gina out with 'his son', as he'd put it, even though they both knew he really wasn't his. But then again, since when did it take blood to make a family?

Christian was losing interest in the whole 'who am I gonna lay tonight' scene. And he thought he'd never lose interest in it. But lo and behold – he did.

He was craving for something deeper. Something like what Sean had.

Well, maybe not exactly like Sean had, considering his marriage and family weren't in the best place.

Christian felt himself yearning for a serious relationship – 'which is a big deal for me.'

He was finding himself wishing for a better life. He wanted a better life. In fact, he needed it.

A life, to him, that would be simply irresistible.