"I
can't escape this hell
So many times I've tried
But I'm
still caged inside
somebody get me through this nightmare
I
can't control myself"
It had been almost a year since Hughes died, and no matter how hard Mustang tried to get over his friend's death, he always seemed to be falling deeper and deeper into the black abyss of depression. At first, indulging himself in bottles of alcohol seemed to be a smart solution, but after a while not even a whole bottle of vodka and rum mixture didn't seem to help the Colonel. That night was no different than any other night. Mustang was sitting in his comfortable leather chair, busy staring out the window with blank eyes and loosely holding a glass of alcohol in his hand. Lost in his own thoughts, he didn't even hear furious footsteps stomping throughout the hallway and towards his office.
"So
what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one would ever
change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real
me
somebody help me tame this animal
(This animal, this
animal)"
A certain angry blond barged in and started talking –or more likely whining- to the colonel who apparently was more interested in the half empty glass than Edward's complaints. After the blond was done, he crossed his arms and took a good look at his superior officer. He bit down his lip and asked "Are you ok?" when he finally realized what a mess he was. Mustang could use a good shaving, and a hair cut, and new clothes...but most of all, he could definitely use some sleep to get rid of the deep dark circles under his eyes. Mustang stared at Edward for a few moments, and then slowly shook his head. Perhaps it was the alcohol that made the tears start streaming down his cheeks, or perhaps it was because of the hug he received from the blond. If he wasn't so drunk, he would definitely be shocked. But then again, nothing made sense to him anymore anyway.
"I
can't escape myself
(I can't escape myself)
So many times I've
lied
(So many times I've lied)
But there's still rage
inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control
myself"
The blond slowly took the glass away from the colonel and put it on the desk, next to the untouched paper work. Turning back to the older man, he wrapped his arms around him again and sighed quietly. Edward had never seen Mustang in such a desperate state before. The Colonel always appeared to be robust, self possessed, always mocking the blond and making sarcastic remarks about his height, -or more likely, his lack of height. Edward didn't know how to make the adult from crying, he wished he could do something better than holding him tightly, slowly rocking back and forth and keep telling him that it was going to be ok. "It's ok" he muttered, combing his fingers through Mustang's messy hair. "I'm here, its ok" repeating the same phrase over and over again, the blond was doing his best to pull Mustang back up from the nightmare that seemed to be spiraling down eternally. When the tears finally stopped flowing, Mustang opened his eyes and looked up at the alchemist. Feeling as if his descent had stopped at least for that moment, a small, hopeful, yet sorrowful smile curled upon his lips.
"Somebody get me through this nightmare..."