Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, I'm only borrowing them, and I promise to have them back in time for tea. They actually belong to J.K. Rowling and various others including – but not limited to – Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Author's Note: I borrowed the first name 'Auriga' for Professor Sinistra from the fabulous Nita (She's a Star), whose story Lamentations of a Starry-Eyed Twit largely inspired me to write this little ficlet, and this story is dedicated to her and Camille (drama-princess) for showing me the way to the SS Snape/Sinistra. After all, even Snape deserves a little lovin'. ;)
"Auriga."
"Severus."
"How . . . nice of you to show up here. At . . . midnight."
"I was walking through and saw your light on, and thought I'd see if you wanted a little company."
". . . You were on a casual stroll through the dungeon?"
". . . Well, not exactly, but . . . oh, bloody well get over yourself and let me make a nice gesture, Severus!"
". . . Right. Come in, before you freeze out there in that . . . strange attire you're wearing."
"Muggles wear things like this all the time."
". . . They're Muggles, Auriga."
"Yes, well. Oh, did you redecorate? It looks a little less black than last time."
". . . What is that you have there?"
"Oh, this. Well, I thought while I was down here, we could try something new together!"
"The last time you talked me into 'trying something new,' I ended up with purple hair."
". . ."
". . ."
"Well, it looked rather nice with your complexion!"
". . ."
"Where are you going?"
". . ."
"Severus!"
". . . I will not tolerate being laughed at in my own home!"
"Then that must explain why you haven't any mirrors –"
". . ."
"– Oh, all right, I'll behave now."
". . ."
"Really."
". . ."
"In fact, I think you're a very handsome and sexy man."
". . ."
"Is that a blush?"
". . ."
"I think it is!"
". . ."
"Now, Severus, come back here."
". . . Fine."
"Anyway, I think we should try this."
"What is it?"
"It's a relaxation technique. It's supposed to relieve stress. I thought you could use that."
". . ."
"Oh, come now, I'm trying to be thoughtful, though Merlin knows you're not making it very easy!"
". . . Fine."
"After all, every time you have Harry Potter in your class, you look like that vein is going to bulge out of your forehead."
". . . My veins do not bulge, Auriga."
"Er. Right, well, anyway –"
"And it is not my fault that Potter is a blithering idiot who gets by on reputation instead of real talent, just like his father before him –"
"Severus. The vein is bulging."
". . ."
"Now, now, pouting isn't going to do you any good."
"I am not pouting. I'm seething. There is a difference."
"If you say so, love."
". . ."
"I thought that would get your attention. Now, let's see how to begin this . . ."
"You are making yourself look increasingly strange, Auriga."
"I'm just doing what the book tells me to!"
". . . There is a book for this?"
"Yes. Now . . ."
"What is that noise? It sounds like a dying hippogriff."
"Come on, Severus, get down here with me . . . oh, no, don't be a spoil-sport!"
"I cannot believe the trouble I put myself through for you, Auriga."
"All right, now . . . you're supposed to lift your leg . . . and I raise my arms . . ."
"I am rather certain this is going to be sorely damaging to your posture."
"Oh, hush. It's actually sort of fun."
"I do not see what you could possibly find enjoyable about this."
"It feels good, Severus! No, no, don't stop."
". . . But my back aches."
"Just a few more seconds."
". . . and I am going to lose my balance."
"That's what I brought the rubber mat for, padding."
"This is ridiculous, Auriga!"
"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Severus! Yoga isn't that bad!"