AN: My first time writing an Ed, Edd and Eddy fic! Wooo~ ! So, first things first. This is slash and I do not own any of the characters in this fic. Consider this my disclaimer! This is going to be slash, so yeah...if you don't like MxM then please- To be frank- screw off. I like reviews, but I also like people that actually read my fics. So yeah, I'm looking for some criticism. Feel free to flame or whatever. Just enjoy!

Chapter 1

I've known Eddy for several years; we've been together through thick and thin. He, along with Ed and I have experienced so much together. They are my friends, practically my brothers.

So it shouldn't be right that I'm feeling like this towards him right? The mere fact that Eddy is the same gender as I should qualify these horrid feelings as being downright improper and inappropriate, isn't that right? That's what I've been taught, the only thing I've been taught by my parents: Never fall in love with a boy.

But I can't help it; a long time ago I tried to convince myself and my body that these feelings were just merely teenage hormones. The stress by all the scandals that Eddy has put me through caused a discord in my mentality that forced me to think of him in less friend/brotherly way. These feelings were not merely hormones; I was not in lust with Eddy.

I was in love with him; I still am in love with him.

In the midst of all the stupidity and irregularity that we were forced in, I started to see Eddy in different light. He was no longer considered just as a friend, nor was he even entitled to being considered a brother.

I developed a crush.

Perhaps if I hadn't been trying to deny my feelings towards him then I would've realized how I started acting around him. I was trying desperately, so desperately, to hide these scandalous feelings that even Ed figured that something was wrong with me.

I was agreeing with every little thing Eddy said. I started to become less sarcastic and quieter. I stopped looking at him directly in the eyes and I never wanted to be alone or five feet close to him.

He thought it was because I wanted to stop being friends with him, that I wanted to join the other crowd. Instead of becoming angry or upset, like I thought he would, he gave me a sad smile and quietly walked away from me.

Eddy avoided me for several weeks; Ed didn't know what to do. It wasn't our first time separating away from each other; we usually got into squabbles and tiffs. But never had we actually stopped seeing each other.

The day we finally decide to talk and be mature teenagers was when we found out that Ed, who was left alone and confused for several long agonizing weeks, was in the hospital. Apparently he didn't eat any food, drink any beverages, or sleep because he was too worried about his best friends.

Johnny, of all people, forced Eddy and me inside the confinements of Ed's room in order to "make up". Johnny couldn't stand seeing Sarah upset over her brother's condition; she was so upset that she couldn't even utter a sound of anger without bursting out in tears. His reason was that if Eddy and I made up then Ed would become better, and Sarah would stop crying.

Not only had my feelings for Eddy affected out friendship, but other people's health as well. I didn't want this to happen; I never intended any one to get involved in my own mess.

Eddy was the first to apologize; he was three seconds earlier than I was. He muttered that it was his fault Ed was in the hospital and that he was sorry that he let his immaturity get the best of him and that was the whole reason I didn't want to stay friends with him anymore. To say I was shocked wasn't even close to what I had truly felt.

I was miserable.

Eddy thought it was his fault, he thought it was because of his immaturity that I had started to act differently towards him.

Right there and then I wanted to confess, I wanted to express what I had been desperately trying to subdue for years: The fact that I was in love with him.

But I didn't.

I stood there silently, as if I was actually contemplating his apology and thanked him. I thanked him. With an awkward shuffle of his feet, he took out his hands from his pockets and lifted it towards me. This meant that all was forgiven, that we could forget everything that had transpired. If I took his hands in mine than that meant we could go back to what use to be- Friends.

I didn't want to take it, but I had to. Slowly I lifted mine as well and had felt my finger tips touch his palm when suddenly a jolt had form. Immediately I snatched my hand way, my heart was beating fast; I couldn't stay in that room much longer. It had felt that the longer I stayed, the closer Eddy would've figured out the answer.

I took a glance at Eddy's face, I became frozen by his expression. His hand was still lifted towards my direction and his eyes were widen with rejection. Slowly he gratified his hand downwards and let out a sheepish smile.

"Heh, I guess I'll see you in the hospital or whatever later on then…"

He walked past me and knocked on Ed's door

"Johnny, we talked. Let us out now."

My back had been turned so I couldn't see his expression; I thought he took a silent leave and that it was just me in the room. But he was still there; Johnny hadn't unlocked the door yet. It was just too quiet that I thought I was alone. It was only the hesitant creaking of the door did I realize that was when he actually left.

Thankfully, he hadn't seen the silent tears that were dripping from my eyes.