Vinyl Pants
Portugal woke up with a pounding headache.
Damn….
She placed a hand over the side of her face as she sat up. Try as she might she couldn't remember the night before. Realization hitting her she looked around quickly to check if she was at someone's house and if there was another person in the bed as well. Sighing in relief, she saw she was back at her own house and no one was in bed or around the room. No stray clothes on the floor. This was deffinately better than the last time she had woken up with a hang over and she had unfortunately ended up at France's place. Not the best way to start your morning.
As Portugal stood she noticed she was fully clothed minus her pants.
That's strange. She thought, I clearly remember wearing pants when I left my house yesterday.
Around 10, her cell phone started to play a very loud Drop Kick Murphy's ring tone. Holding the bridge of her nose she picked it up.
"Hello?"
"Gooooooood Mooooorning Portgaaaaal~!" A happy voice sang from the other side of the phone. "Sleep well?"
"I guess I did. Ireland, do you perchance know what happened last night?"
Silence. Then Ireland burst into laughter and coughed hard.
"DUDE HOW COULD I NOT! I WITNESSED IT ALL!" Portugal stopped. What had she done that was so amusing? It really concerned her that Ireland, of all people, was there at the time of the events.
"W-what happened?"
"Well yesterday was St. Patty's day and I invited you and a couple of others over for a party and-"
"Who else did you invite!" The distressed country shrieked.
Oh god, other people were there too! Oh god no…
"Well, I invited Wales, America, Canada and Ukraine, Russia, Belarus came on her own invitation, Prussia did too but that's ok, oh and Spain!"
"Oh god, Spain."
"Anyway, I had this amazing green beer and you really, really liked it and so did Prussia. Prussia then challenged you to a drinking contest and, being the person who has the largest beer intake in the world, he whooped your arse. After you started hallucinating Spain insisted on making you where these hot pink vinyl pants and you did! Then after a couple of people left, you, me, Spain, America, Prussia, and Wales, get this, pantie raided England. It was glorious!"
Ireland at that point stated laughing and Portugal fell onto the floor in embarrassment.
"W-what else happened?"
"Ok, ok. Then he caught us! You shoulda seen the look on his face as we held his underwear over our heads! Then he was all 'THE BLOODY HELL GET OUT!' So we jumped back out of the window and bolted! America stayed behind though."
"I wonder why." Protugal said sarcastically.
"Anyway! After that we headed over to France's place and T. it! But! We where to loud and he caught us too and the only way he would forgive was if we took off our pants and ran away in slow motion. So we did! It was great!"
"FRANCE MADE US DO WHAT!" Portugal was never going to drink again. Never never never never never, okay maybe, BUT STILL.
"Afterward Prussia got tackled by the Constible just across the street from my place. Who knew he had so many offenses here in Dublin! He's still in the clink now!"
"Is-is that all that happened?" Portugal wished that Ireland was just joking and all that happened was she had gotten drunk and someone took her home and left.
"Of course not silly! This is the best part!"
No such luck.
"THEN Wales thought we should play truth or dare and you were still hammered and that's what made it fun! You chose truth and Spain asked if you liked anyone and you, wait for it, dramaaaaatic paaauuuuussssseeee…. confessed your undying love for, him! IT WAS HILARIOUS! Then after you blacked out Spain took you home."
Portugal felt light headed, she had said what to Spain!
"So, so that's it?"
"Oh, then Wales and I had a wonderful time last night. At first I was a little concerened but damn can me move his-"
"TMI Ire, T. M. I."
"Sorry, guess you don't want to know the rest of my night~! Anyways, is Spain there with you hmmmm~?"
"N-no, I was alone this morin-"
"That jerk doesn't he know to wait until the woman wakes up or do I have to-"
"No, no Ire! I was fully clothed and alone. He must've just left me here and gone home."
"Ok ok. OH GOD."
"What?"
"Your Vinyl Pants! Wales found your vinyl pants. Damn he looks good I hot pink vinyl. D'ya want 'em back?"
"No thanks." The mental image was enough to make her hang over worse.
"So, wanna come over for Easter Sunday? Wales and I are gonna be making purple beer~!"
"Really?"
"Yup! Is that a yes?"
"NO." Portugal hung up her phone and smacked her head on the floor. She was never going to live this down.