Hope you like it wrote while on a different continent.
Run.
The only thing that was truly constant in Emma's life.
Ever since she was little, Emma was fascinated by how people could move their bodies in such a graceful manner that allowed them to propel themselves forward at incredible speeds.
This amazement, this fascination was what made Emma want to run. What made the desire so powerful. So at a very young age, when she had nothing, she began to run and she had something.
At first, she ran for no reason in particular. She ran just to run. So the lvery moment that she could run about a house, a yard, a park, an anything, she took the chance. As Emma ran she felt she could do anything. That she was magical and free. However she had to have someone around her to watch her. She keep her safe.
Even though she felt free, she was still tethered.
But the moment her current foster parents allowed her to run without anyone she took it. Emma could run and feel truly free.
Soon running meant freedom. Running meant getting away from it all. From the people who hurt her, from her anger she held at her parents, from the world. When Emma ran it was just her and she felt free. She felt as if all the burdens she carried with her were lifted away from her.
But soon running became more. Running meant hiding and not getting hurt. Soon every time that Emma thought she'd get hurt she ran. It started with small things but soon the things she began to run from grew and grew and grew.
After being hurt so much Emma began to have a real fear of being hurt. Emma began to build walls around herself to protect herself from being hurt. She stopped letting people see who she really was.
But once she lowered her walls.
Once she tried not to run.
Once she tried to not be fearful.
She let one person in. She didn't run and hide. She stayed and tried to love. Emma tried as hard as she could. But as she had learned from a young age, all good things don't last forever. Because Emma tried to love and stay, she ended up in jail. She ended up getting hurt. She ended up doing the same thing her parents did to her to her son.
Then Emma learned. She stopped even trusting people. She never let her walls down. She didn't care about people. She only cared about not getting hurt.
The life Emma chose was safe. Emma couldn't get hurt because she had no one close enough to her to hurt her. But because she had no one close to her, Emma was also lonely. She didn't have friends or family. She didn't have love.
Emma chose to run from her feelings.
For a long time that's how it was. Emma didn't have what was important. She didn't have a home. She didn't have friends. She didn't have a family. She didn't really have anything.
Then on her 28th birthday she had something.
She had her son.
It was hard at first. Normally, Emma would run. She would hide because she was afraid of being hurt. But she was so lonely. The loneliness made her not want to run for once in her life. So she slightly let him in.
Slowly she began to let him see who she really was.
By letting someone in again she gradually began to have things of importance in her life. She began to have friends, maybe only one or two but she had friends. She began to kind of have a home, maybe it was her friend's apartment but it was kind of a home. She began to start to love Henry. For once in Emma's life she felt like she wasn't really lonely.
For once in Emma's life she began to grow roots that held her down, that kept her from running.
For once in Emma's life she didn't have the burning desire to run all the time.
For once Emma didn't need to get away from everything.
Then all of a sudden Emma had everything she never ever had. She had a family. She had friends. She even had love. But none of it made sense. It couldn't be real and as suddenly as Emma got everything she always wanted and needed, Emma felt the urge to run again.
Then she met him.
He was like her and she could see it. She could see the pain she had reflected in his eyes. When she saw that, she felt something. She felt something real. Something pure. Something she had thought she felt with someone else. For a moment she opened up to him and he opened up to her. But then her instincts kicked in. She ran. She ran across realms and tried to get away.
But you can't get away from the truth. Emma knew that and but she still tried.
As much as Emma had lowered her walls she still wasn't truly ready for that feeling. To be that open. To be that vulnerable. But instead of running and hiding, she fought. Emma used everything she had to fight the feeling. She tried to keep it away but some things cannot be beat. She thought she had beat it away. She thought the feeling had retreated. But the feeling didn't leave. The feeling would always be there. So it waited. It waited for the right time. It waited for Emma to be ready. It waited for Emma to be ready to feel it and not want to run.
The feeling waited a long time.
It waited for her to find her son.
It waited for Emma to run again.
But this time Emma was forced to run. For the first time in her life she was made to run. It was the first time she didn't want to run when she could.
For a year she only had herself and her son. For a year she forgot who she was. For a year Emma ran again. For the first time in a long time she felt the wind in her hair as she ran. For a year she tried to clear her head of an unknown feeling she felt. The feeling she didn't understand.
Then one day she understood it.
It wasn't until a man in leather appeared on her doorstep. That was when the feeling began to make sense. It was at that moment that she felt the need, the urge, and the desire to run again. She needed to get away from the chance of getting hurt.
But Emma resisted the urge. She fought the urge. She didn't run. She went with the man she felt she desperately needed to get away from.
The longer she fought the urge to run, the stronger the feeling grew.
She tried to fight the feeling. But this time the feeling fought back.
And the feeling fought hard.
It took a month. It took the death of the man she once thought she loved. It took a trip to the past. That was what it took for Emma to surrender to the feeling. The feeling she had been feeling for almost two years now.
It had taken Emma a long time but she had finally admitted defeat to the feeling of love.
It then took three more years. Three more years to finally eliminate the only constant throughout her life. Emma doesn't feel the need to run anymore. Now Emma doesn't need to get away. She doesn't have anyone around her that would hurt her. She has no anger for her parents. She has no need to get away from anything.
Because now Emma has everything. She has a family who loves her. She has friends. She has a home. She has her son. She has love.
Run.
It was something she had no need to do anymore.
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