The gang was walking. Sango watched their slow strides with increasing interest as they made their way back. It had gotten slower, and slower, each person lost, dreamily in their own thoughts, not breaking out of their own misery long enough to notice that they were going so slowly.
They had nowhere to go, really, so they were headed vaguely towards Kaede's village, and they all seemed to be rather unhappy with one another. Sango wondered briefly how this had happened. InuYasha had the body slung over his shoulder, and he was radiating gloom, even more so than the others.
Sango walked a little closer to Kagome, but she was ignored completely by Kagome's angry face. She sighed, not daring to start a conversation. Was there some travesty she'd missed?
She walked over to the Monk. Upon examining him she saw that he was in no way his normal, lighthearted self. He was composed, but only barely, with some negetive emotion lingering underneath. Amazed, she found him so out of it that he didn't even notice when she brushed up against him. She'd tried that as a tactic to cheer him up, but she was ignored. Sango was, at this point, shell-shocked. All her friends were quietly depressing one another.
After a while longer of walking, she got her nerve up, her worry slowly changing into anger. What happened that was so bad as to ruin the dynamics between the motley crew? They'd done what they wanted to do, why were they worse off then when they started? Sango was no less infuriated with them than when she finaly spoke, tearing in front of them to halt her companions.
"Isn't this what everyone wanted?" She asked, trying to keep her annoyance out of her tone. "Naraku's dead, and we know where the last of the jewel is, what else?" Everyone else stopped, however no one by Kirara lifted their head to look at her. Kirara mewed. "What's wrong with everyone?" she asked, pleadingly, her rage tempering her words with venom. She simply didn't understand! This didn't make any sense. She tried again, hoping to have everyone as happy as the ought. "We should be celebrating, not pitying ourselves!" she said, not even bothering to keep her voice fury-free. "We saved the day, what else do you people want? We're heros! We broke god only knows how man curses, and we're about to go end the line of the jewel! Why don't you see that!" By this time, Sango was so desperately confused, and she was livid with the lack of reaction to her animated plea. InuYasha turned around, and he was the first to speak to her.
"You know why I'm unhappy," he said simply. He didn't have any inflection in his tone at all. His face was a placid mask, making it look like he couldn't feel at all. Sango sighed. Well, it was true, she did know his reason, at the very least; InuYasha had to kill Kikyo in the final battle. She knew how hard that must've been for him. The thought of him having to swallow all those emotion and turn his heart to stone to kill her made her think of her own battle… Her battle wasn't with someone she was in love with, though. It was with Kohaku. It wasn't the same, but it was close. She had cried at her own battle, but she was happy with the fact thatshe'd finally freed him. InuYasha, however, didn't have the same consolation; Kikyo was now all the way in Kagome, and that was as free as the woman would have ever gotten.
However, that still didn't explain why everyone else was unhapp—SLAP!
Sango's head snapped up from where she'd found it drooping. InuYasha was on the ground, and Kagome's face was hidden by her bangs. It seemed pretty clear what happened there… Kagome stormed off angrily, muttering profanities, Sango was sure. Sango bent down to help InuYasha up.
Sango winced at her recollection. Of course Kagome was angry that InuYasha was mourning Kikyo's loss. So, it didn't explain why the Monk was so out of it. Kagome was always angry with InuYasha for being so jealous, and yet Kagome had an even less forgiving heart in that area. She would get so mad at him for growling at a waiter who'd looked at her funny. He'd been off his feet, as in, unable to stand, for a week after that. InuYasha made no attempt to hide his jealous nature, though. Sango's brow wrinkled. However, recently he hadn't been so jealous. Or maybe he'd only been feighning indifference, but either way, he was better at keeping it in check. Was that was Kagome was upset about? Did Kagome take it as a complement, but train InuYasha out of it? No, certainly it was the Kikyo thing… If her dear friend was that stupid then there was no hope for her, and Sango never did think of Kagome as stupid.
"Are you all right?" Sango asked InuYasha, coming back from her own thoughts. InuYasha made it a point not to take her hand, and help himself, and Kikyo's body up. She hadn't expected anything different. His pride, even in an emotionally stunted state as he was, was a commodity he held dear.
"Yeah…" he said vaguely. "Why don't you two just go and sleep in Kaede's hut, I'll be… Around." Sango nodded. She'd been around InuYasha enough to know that he was asking to be by himself. She took a brief look at Miroku - who appeared to be counting sticks on the ground - before she began to walk away. Miroku wasn't an idiot; he knew what InuYasha was asking for too. Sango sighed again. He probably had some wise words to cheer him up. She wanted to hear them too. She loved to hear Miroku being so wise. She distanced herself a good deal, but not so far that she couldn't hear Miroku and InuYasha start talking.
"How could you…" she heard one voice. That had to be the Monk. That was an awfully cold tone for him to use, though. She didn't really understand how those were wise words, but she trusted she'd find out. After all, Miroku hadn't let her down thus far, and the wisdom wish he had access to always amazed her, and always made her feel more and more attached to him.
"Oh, don't pull that shit on me, Miroku," InuYasha snapped. "I can't control the way I feel, so sorry!" Well, that was InuYasha, - she was pretty sure - but it was an odd thing for him to say.
'I'm sorry!'? Thought Sango filled with disbelief.
"You're nothing of the sort!" said Miroku quickly. She was pretty sure it was him, but he had malice in his tone, which was so foreign that Sango was no longer sure these were her InuYasha and Miroku. Maybe she'd stumbled into a different dimension by accident… She'd heard of that happening before.
"Look, I haven't made a move. You can have--!" There was a sound of flesh meeting flesh, a sharp 'thump' against the ground, followed by the sound of potery smashing. Sango dashed back to see what had happened.
What she saw was odd, but her brain was already working out what had transpired.
Miroku was standing over InuYasha, who was on his side with a split lip, and shards of Kikyo's clay body thrown askew.
Why is everyone mad at him today? Sango yelled in her mind, before screeching to Miroku, "Hey! What's wrong with you?" She went back over to help InuYasha up again, who this time took her hand, a grateful expression crossed his features for a moment, then was gone as soon as it had come. This seemed to make Miroku even angrier. "Filthy mutt!" he yelled before turning on his heel and marching off, making sure to break Kikyo's body with his feet on his way. Sango could've sworn she saw steam rising off of him.
InuYasha waived her off.
"Go follow him, calm him down!" He snapped. There was a slight catch in his voice as he looked at the broken form of the woman he had loved. On his face, however, he held nothing but anger. Where had that grateful expression gone? Now he was glaring! Sango was confused. Why the hell was InuYasha concerned? This… This was all wrong. "Go!"
The tone was so stern, so commanding and so firm that Sango's limbs snapped into action before her brain registered the order. She went.
She followed Miroku through the village. In a crowd, just before she'd caught up to him, she'd lost sight of him.
It's okay, she thought. After all, she knew where he was going. She went to find him… Wait, he wasn't in the bar… She went through a short checklist of other places he might be, and Sango checked around town in those places, the events that had just passed swimming through her mind. What was wrong with everyone? There had to be more to this than was it appeared… Sango would have – given someone else were happy with her – celebrated. She was so happy that they'd finally killed Naraku that she was willing to get hammered. So drunk, in fact, that she wouldn't even care what passed the night before. Maybe she'd be able to finally tell Miroku how she felt…?
No, she thought, she wouldn'tbe telling anyone anything of the sort until she figured out what the heck was going on. Why was everyone mad at InuYasha? Why was InuYasha the only one being anywhere close civil? Usually it was the other way around…
Sango walked into Kaede's guest hut, which she'd had made for them. Miroku was there, meditating. She sighed in relief at finding him.
"Hoshi Sama?" She said, standing in the doorway. Miroku opened his eyes and glared up at her. That made her flinch, her relief quickly retreating. His stern, angry gaze was more painful to her than she was willing to admit. "Hoshi Sama," she continued, unwilling to let her weakness show. "What's bothering you?" She asked.
"That fool, InuYasha," said Miroku in a fiercely dark tone. Sango winced, hoping sincerely that she didn't cause this. "He's such a…A… A fool!" Sango had learned before, that Miroku rarely used words worse than 'poot', and she thought it was endearing, in a way. This meant, clearly to her, that he was really mad. She sat down next to him, keeping herself away from his hand. She was surprised to find that it never came, but simply blamed it on his mood.
"Hoshi Sama, what did he do wrong?" She asked, hearing the worried edge in her own voice.
"He has stolen the only thing I hold dear," said Mikoru. By the way he held himself at that moment, Sango could tell he didn't want her to press the subject. Sango got up, standing over him closer than she would have normally.
"Is there anything I can do to make you feel bett--?"
"No." Said Miroku, quickly cutting her off, as if to say 'get out, now'. Sango was shocked. He didn't even ask her to do anything sexual, like she was expecting. She quickly got out of there.
He didn't notice me making a move on him? Sango was terrified at this moment. Of all the people in the world to notice innuendo, Miroku was the highest on her list. She decided it would be good to figure out what went wrong with InuYasha, but he wanted to be alone too. That was a no-go…
Kagome, she found, went back to her own time. Sango was at a loss. The only person she could locate at that point was Miroku, and seeing him in a bad mood was too much for her at that moment. It hurt her to watch him glare at her. When he did she felt like her insides were bleeding out of her heart.
She went to Kaede's hut, not the guest hut, and sat down in front of Kaede. The old priestess was a kind woman, and a wise one. Her wisdom was of a very different style than Miroku's, and perhaps that was just what she needed right now.
"Miko Sama, do you know what happened with the others?" She asked. Shippo came out of… somewhere, and sat on her knee.
"What d'you mean?" he asked, looking up at her while munching some unknown sweet. Sango sighed. She realized that she'd been doing that a good deal over the past couple hours. She decided to give Shippo the short of it, rather than explaining everything.
"Kagome and Miroku are angry with InuYasha. So angry, in fact, that Kagome slapped him and left--"
"—That doesn't take that much--" Shippo added.
"—Yeah, but the amazing part is that Miroku punched him, and shattered Kikyo's body! Where were you while all this happened, anyway?"
Shippo blinked, his expression calm, and his composure unaffected. He shrugged. Clearly he didn't believe her, nor did he choose to answer her. She probably didn't want to know, anyway. Kaede, on the other hand, seemed to think it over, passing it through the analytic centers of her brain that would churn out the wisdom that Sango so desperately wanted to hear from someone.
"I don't know, Sango." she said, then retuned to her herbs again. Sango nodded. Couldn't say she wasn't expecting that, after all.
…
The next morning Sango opend her eyes. She looked around the hut to try and find Miroku, but didn't have to look long before realizing he wasn't there. It was somewhat of a relief not to see him right then, she had to admit. It was agony to watch him glower at her so angrily. Her thoughts, more and more, revolved around how to cheer him up. That was all she really wanted to do at that moment; calm him down, find out what was wrong, resolve it, and… Then deal with her feelings for him. She pushed aside the bamboo flap that acted as a door, and went out into the streets. Miroku, when she'd first met him, had revolted her, and she'd never thought that her attachment would grow so well. The thought of him merits out weighing his lecherous nature had never occurred to her. She looked around briefly for Miroku, but didn't see him. She wanted to see him smile in that goofy way he always did just before she smacked him. She wanted to see him embarres InuYasha in the way he always managed to do with very little apparent effort. She wanted to find him, as well, but only half-heartedly. Her search, however, didn't turn up any Miroku. Instead she found InuYasha. He was lazing at the edge of town, up in a tree. Some company was better than none in Sango's book, and she really was earnestly interested in how to cheer Miroku up, and get him out of his bad humor. She smiled weakly at InuYasha, and came over. As she neared she saw him look up, his ears twitching around furiously to locate the noise. They settled on her after a moment, then one flicked back to listen to other things. She hadn't really expected good company out of this. InuYasha would probably just look at her, and that was if she was lucky! However, maybe InuYasha was a little lonely too, without Kagome. The reason Sango thought this was because he'd actually jumped down and come up face to face with her.
He didn't even attempt to smile. "'Morning, Sango," he said quietly, almost as if he was forcing himself to talk to her. Now that he was closer to her she could see clay dust in his hair, and a few scratched on his hands that were unmistakably from the shards of Kikyo.
"Good morning, InuYasha," she said, carefully putting more cheer in her voice than InuYasha had. She wanted to get him in a better mood before she interrogated him. "Nice weather…" she said, lamely. She'd never really tried to get InuYasha in a better mood, and didn't know how to go about doing it. InuYasha looked at her, blankly. After a moment his hollow expression cleared slightly to have one eyebrow go up. Sango smiled. It was a relief to see such a trademarked InuYasha expression back into place. It was a questioning, slightly annoyed expression, mostly, even though right now it wasn't portraying annoyance very well. Sango laughed a little, mostly from felif, and InuYasha's face split into a small grin, just like that. Sango was truly happy to see that. InuYasha turned his head to face the sunlight, revealing the right side of his face. Sango gasped.
"InuYasha!" she said, staring at the faded purple bruise on his jaw. His head snapped back to where it had been, his slightly happy expression gone in a flash. Sango felt her face crease with worry.
"How the hell did he manage to bruise you?" she mumbled as she touched it gently. He drew back quickly with a wince. From here she could also see that the split lip, which she'd seen before, wasn't gone. These were both from Miroku's punch, seeing as how Kagome had hit him on the left. Sango withdrew her hand, concern emanating from her. "Do you have any idea why he hit you?" she asked. Well, she was getting the interrogation that she wanted, but she didn't quite realize how bad this was. Had she known she would have reprimanded Miroku much more than she did. How had InuYasha earned this?
InuYasha looked away sadly, shading his entire face now, rather than just half. Sango had never seen that expression on him before, so it took her a moment to register in her mind, but she diplomatically didn't let her confusion show in her face.
"I don't know…" he said. There was a pause. Sango kept thinking he was going to say more than that, but more never came. He didn't meet her gaze, which she held locked on him. He seemed to be thinking deeply about what to say next, or maybe just trying to forget she was there. Sango couldn't help but pity him; she'd never seen him this sad. Even when Kagome had left because she was jealous of Kikyo, InuYasha hadn't been so… heartbreaking. She shook that thought aside as best she could, but there was a constant reminder right in front of her, so it wasn't an easy task. She sighed, then decided to continue her questioning.
"Well, the Monk said you took something from him…" She prompted uncertainly. InuYasha laughed weakly, clearly trying for his usual, hard-hearted, vaguely evil laugh, but failing miserably, seeing as how it came out with a nervous edge, as well as a guilty one.
"He's lying," he said bluntly, a slight growl creeping into his tone, though it sounded very forced. "I didn't take anything, something he has took something of mine," he snapped.
"Something took something of…?" she began. Sango didn't know what this meant, but she had a feeling she wasn't going to get and answer clearer than that. "What about Kagome-Chan?" she tried. "What happened with her?" InuYasha winced, then made it a point to look around for a while before answering. Sango simply stood there patiently. Birds passed overhead, and InuYasha – who was certainly not one for bird watching – kept his eyes on them until they were out of sight, formulating his answer.
"I told her the truth about how I feel," he said with a shrug, eventually. Sango was confused.
"You don't love her?" she inquired. InuYasha nodded slightly. From what she could see, he was completely indifferent, but he still had that hollow expression that left Sango on edge.
"I think I used to…" he said, putting his hands in his pockets with another shrug. This time, however, he looked a little more like he was shrinking away from her. "But, I don't anymore..." he said, trailing off miserably. There was a long silence – a shocked one, on Sango's part - and then InuYasha spoke again. "Now that… That Naraku's dead, you're going to go home and try to rebuild the Demon Slayer village, aren't you?" Sango nodded. She started to smile, but found that she couldn't. Not with the news he'd just given her. Not with Kagome's happiness in such jeopardy as this. She found that she could either speak, or cry, so she endeavored to make sure it was the former alone.
"I may not be back for a very long time…" She said, biting her lip to keep it from trembling. InuYasha looked around again, but this time he seemed to be checking to see if there was anyone watching him, rather than stalling.
"Can I come?" he asked casually. Sango stepped back in surprise, suddenly all her urge to shed tears was pushed to the back parts of her mind. She blinked, and moved her mouth stupidly.
"Why?" Was all she could manage to squeak out. InuYasha just shrugged again, then answered as if she had asked reasonably, rather than like some kind of cartoon mouse.
"Well," he said. "I seem to have royally screwed up here, and you're the only person around who doesn't slap or punch me," he said. Sango didn't really know how to react to that. After a moment she decided there couldn't be any point for him to stay here and be 'sat' several times in a row once Kagome got back. And besides, he could lift heavy things, and be useful for rebuilding.
"Well, yeah, I suppose," she said after a while of thought. "I was going to leave today, but I cou--"
"I'll come today," he said firmly, finally facing her again, his golden eyes gleaming brightly in the half shadowed light cast onto his face.
End Chapter OneWhee! It's done! And I love it a whole lot more than the first time I wrote it! YAYS! Heehee, plus, I more than tripled the word-count. Tell me what you think!
Miko-chan.