A.N: This fanfic is not meant to really be taken seriously, I wrote it as a joke. So continue reading at your own risk.
Warnings: One-sided love, male/male love, masturbation, general stupidness.
Mike Schmidt x Phone Guy
First night on the job, always a fun experience, right? Wrong! Don't you dare tell me it's fun. Especially not at this job. If only you knew the horrifying shit I had to deal with. Oh, maybe I should have started off by saying my name instead of yelling nonsense you wouldn't understand. Hello, my name is Mike Schmidt, and I am the unfortunate sucker who agreed to be the night guard at a run down pizzeria filled with psycho animatronics who are trying to break into my office and stuff me in a suit. And no, not a fancy suit and tie, I mean an animatronic suit with enough bars penetrating through each and every space, it would put London's large number of pubs to shame! (This is a new low for me, making bar jokes. Are you happy now? YOU caused this!)
Anyway, not much to really talk about. I just spend all week closing doors and turning lights on to stay alive. Easiest, yet hardest job in the world? Not only do I have to deal with these Jeff the Killer style robots, but there's also something else that annoyed the hell out of me. This stupid voice that rang out as soon as I sat down in the office. Yeah, I get it, the guy is trying to help me survive and giving me directions on what I need to do. But DAMN does he talk too much! Honestly, if I was face to face with him, I might be forced to punch him just to shut him up.
The constant rambling really doesn't help me at all, but whatever. I mean there is a mute button I could always press. But. . .Well let's just listen to what he has to say, maybe there will be something important in there. After the first night, which wasn't too bad may I add, I left and went home. I contemplated not coming back, but sadly I had a contract to uphold. "They don't tell you this when you sign up" is WAY understating the severity of this situation.
As soon as I walked into the door, the already way too familiar voice broke through the silence of the room. I sat down in the all but uncomfortable computer chair and flipped through the camera feeds. My eyes gazed at the nonmoving creatures that I knew would soon be active. I listened as the man on the phone spoke to me. Second night, I was feeling confident. I really let his words set into my mind this time.
I have no idea why my brain suddenly started to wander, but before I knew it, I suddenly felt myself holding onto a strange feeling. This guy sounded pretty. . .cute? I mean hell, that stuttering, that nervous laugh, the way he tries to comfort me and reassure me that everything will be okay. It did calm me enough for me to feel at ease. The way he spoke sounded so prim and formal, even despite him sounding nervous. Then again, after working here for such a long time, I suppose anyone would sound like that.
I flicked over to the camera to the show stage. Only one was off the stage so far. It was pretty early after all. The voice on the phone informed me at that moment "check on the curtain in Pirate Cove from time to time. . ." That would have been a good thing to know earlier in the night. I quickly flipped over to the feed in Pirate Cove, but the curtain was thrown open and inside it was empty. I was rather confused, until I switched over to the west hall camera and spotted the brown-red fox sprinting full speed down the hall. My heart skipped a beat or two as I scrambled out of the camera and slammed on the door button.
"Thanks for the info a little late, man. . ." As the recording finished off, I found myself wandering back to the man who was speaking. I wondered what he looked like behind the telephone. There's no way that someone who had a voice so sweet and smooth like that didn't also have a physical form of similar adjectives. I tried to shake the idea away. After all, I would probably never meet this guy anyway. Then again. . .if he works at the same office, maybe we would cross paths?
I suddenly started to feel happy at the thought of meeting him. He sounded important to the company, and I was a sucker for power figures. Mostly I liked to make powerful people bow to their knees and make them beg for me to do all sorts of dirty things to them. I have a power complex, in a way.
Naughty images started to fill my fantasies, and I began to feel myself getting turned on. "Not now, boner." I cursed at myself. This was definitely not the right time to do this. I was able to finally focus on getting through the shift and made it to 6 am yet again. I once again left and went home.
The next time I came in filled with a questionable feeling. My nerves were twitchy and my heart was racing quickly. I didn't realize it until the phone started to ring, that the reason I was feeling that way was because I was excited to hear the man on the phone yet again. I already knew the drill; check the cameras. Blah blah blah. The only thing he said to me was pretty much just some stupid advice that he then says to forget about. "What a dork. . ." I thought to myself with a chuckle. One phrase he said kinda stuck into my mind for all the wrong reasons. "Then again if they think you're an empty costume, they might try to... stuff a metal skeleton into you." Speaking of stuffing something inside of someone. . .
Oh great now I'm horny again. My eyes gazed down at the tent in my pants, and that was when I suddenly realized that this man was causing me more trouble than actually helping me. I glanced back at the cameras, everything seemed to be fine for now. Maybe it wouldn't hurt just to do a little messing around. . .Right? Right! I shut the doors just until I finished. Didn't want to be bothered,after all.
My member started to become increasingly hard as I freed it from its cage(*cough* I mean my pants.) and I ran my finger tips along the length slowly at first, then increasing the speed gradually. The images that flashed through my mind were of whoever was behind the voice on the phone. My fantasies took over my body, giving me an extreme feeling of pleasure and excitement as I tugged and jerked with swift movements. I imagined myself dominating and taking control of the high authority figure, seeing his body pressed up against mine, wanting more.
I hit the replay button on the phone recording and played the first night's message over again and it made me closer and closer to my release. The moaning that was filling the room I'm sure was loud enough for the animatronics to hear from across the building. I was reaching my end as the recording was also reaching the end.
As I came. . .to the conclusion that I might be falling in love with a voice, I decided that I had to meet him soon. Perhaps after this week was over, I'd find his number and give him a call. I then noticed that the battery was draining very quickly, so I opened the door. "Alright. Time to get back to work." I told myself.
Getting through that night as even harder than my dick. . .I mean the previous nights. Yeah. Anyway. I went home once the clock struck 6 am, eager to finish up the week so I could meet my sweet. The next night I sat down and got ready for the usual. The machine clicked on and the familiar voice filled the room. I listened in closely.
"Hey listen. . .I might not be around to send you a message tomorrow." Said the voice on the phone. My heart dropped into my stomach and I suddenly had a bad feeling. There was a loud banging on the door, and for a second I jumped, thinking it was in the room with me, but I quickly realized it was just the phone. As the message went on, it was increasingly clear that the man was in trouble. He sounded distressed. Suddenly I heard the music play, and I knew that was the end. The message cut off and then ended.
I slumped back into my chair and stared at nothing. I felt like nothing. Even though I had not me the guy, I felt like I lost someone important to me. I shook my head to clear the thoughts away. It was a stupid fantasy, falling in love with a voice. I'll get over it, I'm sure.
I picked myself up and got through the night, barely. He wasn't lying when he said shit gets real as the week goes on. Just one more night and I will be in the clear. I came in the next night, but I didn't feel the same. I was unable to concentrate or focus on the work. I realized that I couldn't get over the love and connection I had for this mystery man. Even though we never spoke directly, I felt something was there. It felt real to me, even if it wasn't.
It was 2 am, and that's when I decided it. I can't take it anymore. If I can't be with him in life, I will be with him in death. I opened both doors and shut the cameras off. I wheeled back in the chair and waited. Waited for death. Waited to be united with my beloved. Within a minute I heard footsteps accompanied by the haunting laughs of Freddy. On one side, red glowing eyes peeked through the shadows. The other side, a pair of blue. The laughing began to get louder and louder until everything went black, and I was left in darkness.
Game over.