A/N- Hey all! Lol, sorry that was lame. I would just like to begin by saying thank you so much for reading this! This is my second attempt at a fan fic and first attempt at a LWD fic, my first fic didn't work out so well. I really hope this one goes better. So, please review, even if you say one word, I appreciate it. If there is another LWD fic similar to this, I would just like to state, I'm not trying to steal your idea, I really didn't know and I'm sorry. I really love the readers' suggestions, so if you have any you can PM me or leave them in a review. I'm sorry it's kind of short, I'll try to make the other chapters longer, it was just the ending just seemed so right for the first chapter. I would also like apologize for any grammar and spelling errors. Well, enjoy!

Summary: Derek's estranged mother, is diagnosed with a rare, terminal disease and the doctors are giving her two weeks to live. With this Derek must deal with old emotions surfacing as well as old memories he'd like to forget. But, you know what they say, with all pain, there comes love. Dasey!

A/N 2- Sorry, I'd just like to point out that all chapters will be in Derek's POV, unless I change my mind later, for some odd reason. On with the story!

Disclaimer: I do not own Life With Derek.

Life With Derek: Depths of our Beings

Chapter One:

A Mind to Lose

They say time heals all wounds. But, I might be one to disagree. I think every horrible experience one has ever had, follows them, like a ticking time bomb. The bomb may lay dormant for months, even years, but its always there waiting to take over your mind and heart at the worst time possible.

By looking at me you couldn't say I'm scarred, I guess I'm a pretty good actor. Not even the great Casey, the smartest person I have ever met, could ever guess what happened in the past. They say we're all in denial, what was what my 9th grade English teacher used to say…The Nile is not just another river in Egypt, most people are in denial. I guess she wasn't a crock…okay so maybe she was, but she was a right crock.

I think the only reason I'm sane today is because of my friends or rather because of my popularity. I was so busy being "Mr. Popular", that I didn't have time to think. Casey always tells me what an idiot I am for not thinking, but I think it saved me.

Well, I should probably stop talking around the subject, that's another one of my strong points.

The day was like any other it was around 8:05 and I was going to be late for school, the usual. My dad was doing his usual screaming at me to get my ass in gear and as usual I was ignoring him and taking my own time.

"Derek! Derek, GET DOWN H…HERE!" I laughed a little; my dad was a little old for his voice to be cracking.

I strut into the kitchen and I came face to face with Nora (my step-mom, she's okay…best mom I've ever had) and My dad, George. They had paled faces and my other siblings and step sibs were nowhere to be found.

"Umm…hey dad, Nora, where is everyone?"

"Derek, sit down…" my dad said practically shoving me into the chair.

"Umm, okay…" I said awkwardly

"I don't know how to tell you this Derek, so I'm just going to come out and say it. I just…I just got off the phone with the hospital…" My face grew darker, "It seems your mother has been diagnosed with a terminal illness and they're giving her about two weeks to live…I think it's best if you and her work out your differences before she…uhh…passes…"

"DAD! You've got to be fucking kidding me!" I erupted out of the chair, "NO FUCKING WAY AM I GOING TO GO DOWN TO THE GOD DAMNED HOSPITAL AND TELL HER SHIT ABOUT HOW SHE WAS A GREAT MOTHER!"

"Derek, calm down no one's asking you to…"

I cut him off "CALM DOWN! I"M NOT GOING TO CALM DOWN!" With that I took off to the door, only to come face to face with Casey MacDonald.

"Derek?" She asked almost sheepishly.

I lowered my head to the ground "What?" I asked not quite inaudibly.

"Umm, what was all the screaming about my mom just said that your dad wanted to talk to you about something… Derek? Derek are you crying?"

I froze; I didn't know how to respond. Yes, I know hard to believe the great Derek Venturi was wailing his eyes out in front of his stepsister. "No, why would you think that?"

"Umm…your eyes are all red and your shirt is soaked…" she said quietly, as if she was afraid of my response.

"Umm…that, I just am having…a contact issue…" I said lying through my teeth.

"But, Derek, you don't wear contacts…" she stated awkwardly.

"Well, you see I do, umm I just got them Thursday…" I said trailing off.

"Oh right…" she said unconvinced.

"Well," I said breaking away from her stare, "I better go change my shirt, umm…see you at school…I guess."

"Umm…okay see you at school…umm bye…" she said practically running out the door.

I came back down from upstairs and almost made it to the door when I heard my dad practically throwing himself at me to get me to stop leaving.

"Derek! DEREK! Come back here, we need to discuss this!" he yelled at me.

"We don't need to discuss anything!" I spewed back at him

"Derek!" he shrieked, grabbing my forearm.

I pulled away fiercely, "What do you want me to say dad, 'I'm so sorry for her, this terrible!' No, that's not how it works!" I lowered my voice, "Do you know how many nights I would pray, PRAY, that she would die? Do you know how many nights she made me pray I would die?"

I opened his mouth, but I cut him off "What? You didn't know? Oh, cry me a river, dad! Maybe, you should have opened your godamn eyes! It happened for about 9 years before you finally got your act together!" Oh shit…I'm crying, "You don't know what she did, you don't know what I felt like, you don't know anything!" I practically fell against against the door yelping out pitiful sobs.

He sat down next to me and pulled me into a hug "I'm so sorry Derek, you don't know how sorry I am…"

A/N- Thank you so much for reading! I'm sorry if it sucked! Please review!

-chickenboyssuck