Song is "Home" by Phillips Phillips
Hold on, to me as we go
As we roll down this unfamiliar road
Pidge likes to work.
She likes to sit with a computer or a piece of alien technology that she's never seen before and write new code. She likes to hack into Galra databases to look for Dad and Matt or just for the fun of it. She likes to build robots and see how close to sentient she can make them.
She likes to do this because if she stops moving then she'll start to think.
And thinking is painful when you're this far from home.
Pidge avoids the windows.
At first it was fascinating to look out into open space and think, "Most humans will never see this."
But every time she looks outside all she sees is an endless expanse of stars and she's reminded that Earth is thousands upon thousands of light years away, far from reach. She's reminded that she left home of her own will, left behind the last bit of family she had remaining, just to look for her father and brother who, for all she knows, could already be gone where she can't follow.
Mom is alone in their two-story house with the pieces of their life. Pidge wonders what happened to the robotics project she left on her desk, with the plan to finish it when she returned. Wonders if it's still there. If Mom's put it away or thrown it out or left it untouched for fear of disrupting now-stale memories.
Pidge left home to get closer to Matt and closer to Dad. Dad is just as far as he was before and she's only this much closer to finding Matt, and even though she wants to look harder, every time she tries she's thwarted by another threat that Voltron must take care of, another mission that steals her attention and pulls her away as Matt's trail gets colder and colder.
Pidge loves being the Green Paladin. She loves being the team's brain, loves the rush she gets when she has sixty seconds to hack into a system or the whole base will explode, loves the exhilaration she feels as she pilots Green through the air, high on a sense of freedom that she used to watch in the wings of the model airplanes she and Dad would build together and then fly through the back yard.
She thinks maybe she understands what Matt was talking about when he got so excited about being chosen for the Kerberos mission.
She thinks this and then she continues her forward momentum, because if she pauses for just a moment her emotions will catch up to her and she thinks if she starts to cry then she'll never stop.
And although this wave is stringing us along
Just know you're not alone
Lance is loud.
This was the first thing she noticed about him, back at the Garrison. She'd been hiding in the background, trying to sink into the walls, trying not to be noticed for fear of being recognized and then thrown out. But Lance had spotted her and pulled her out of the shadows.
"You're Pidge, right? I guess we're a team now. The name's Lance."
Months later and here they are, in space, fighting evil aliens. Everything here is different, so Pidge appreciates any constants she can find.
Lance is loud, and Lance will always be loud. He will always be obnoxious and pushy and ridiculous, and Pidge loves it because it is one thing she can count on to never change.
"Die!" yells Lance as they sit in front of the screen that she and Hunk had managed to rig up with a gaming console. They're playing the game they bought at the Space Mall. Pidge is winning, like she always does.
"Damnit Pidge, I'm winning this one!" growls Lance as he moves the joystick on his controller so violently that she thinks he's going to break it.
She's sitting with her shoulders hunched and her legs tucked under her, tongue between her teeth in concentration.
Lance gets too into it and falls off the couch.
Pidge wins.
"Ah, quiznack," moans Lance, rubbing his bruised hip. "I hate you."
Pidge smiles because this too is a constant.
She appreciates constants.
'Cause I'm going to make this place your home
Hunk is soft.
He's the feeling of wrapping oneself in a blanket and drinking hot chocolate on a snowy day. He's the smell of fresh baked cookies. He's a warm summer breeze.
Pidge likes to just be around him. He's the only one of the team who understands when she falls into technobabble. He's the one who helps her tinker and brings her snacks when she's been up for twelve hours straight trying to comb the universe for some sign of her family.
Back at the Garrison, Hunk was their voice of reason. Despite his fears and insecurities, he took care of them then and he takes her care of now.
"—so if we connect this to this—"
"Then the current reroutes! Perfect!"
Hunk connects the wire and it works for just a moment.
Then it explodes in a shower of sparks and the lights in the room flicker off.
"Um…was that supposed to happen?" asks Hunk with a frown.
"Hm," says Pidge. "Maybe we should try something else."
Hunk is warmth and he is the familiarity of tinkering with machines on the floor of the lounge. He's the one who's there when Pidge wakes up with tears on her face and a lump in her throat, the one who fixes her a warm drink and doesn't ask anything that will hurt.
Pidge smiles when she walks into the kitchen and finds a plate of cookies on the counter and the smell of peanut butter on the air, because propped up in front of the plate is a note that says "For Pidge" and she knows without much thought that Hunk is the one who made them.
Hunk is warmth and that is something that is rare in the cold vastness of space.
Settle down, it'll all be clear
Keith takes a while to get used to.
He's impulsive and angry and stand-offish. He lives in a shack in the desert by himself, but he's looking for the same clues that Pidge is looking for. The only difference is that he found something physical while all Pidge found was a single word.
The first time she meets him, she's reminded of that whole 'seven degrees of separation' thing, where any given person knows everyone in the world to no farther than the seventh degree. Pidge's brother and father told her about Shiro. Shiro is like Keith's brother. So Pidge, to the third degree, already knows Keith when she meets him.
Both of them are missing family.
The difference is that he found his.
It is calm. They returned from a successful mission a little while ago and the Paladins are relaxing in the various ways they can.
Pidge is not relaxed. She's never relaxed. Instead she's sitting on the couch, hunched over one of her computers with second and third computer running programs on the couch cushion in front of her and on the floor by her side.
"Hey."
Pidge looks up. It's Keith.
"Hey," she mumbles, eyes returning to her screen.
She doesn't hear him cross the room, but moments later his slender fingers gently close the computer in front of her.
She huffs indignantly and glares at him, but he doesn't seem to notice as he picks up the second computer and places it on the floor by its partner. He sits, the couch sinking slightly under his weight.
"I'm busy," says Pidge.
"No, you're pretending to be busy because you're afraid to sit still," returns Keith. Something in his expression irritates Pidge; it's almost disapproving. Keith does not get to be disapproving of anything she does.
"So what?"
"So why do you think they kicked me out of the Garrison?"
Pidge freezes. No. She is not having this discussion with Keith of all people. She refuses.
"I know you miss them. I missed Shiro. But you need to be patient."
"Shut up."
"You'll find them. I promise you will. But you can't run yourself dry before you do."
"Shut up!"
Pidge moves to leave but he catches her wrist and stands with her. Then he does the unexpected; he wraps his arms around her and pulls her close.
"It's okay, Pidge. We're here for you. We'll help you find them."
Keith is hard to figure out. He's impulsive and angry and stand-offish, and, very occasionally, he knows exactly what to say and exactly what to do.
Keith is different from the others because he understands.
Pidge closes her eyes and presses her face into the fabric of his jacket.
Neither of them mention this later.
And if Keith's jacket is wet when Pidge pulls away, neither of them mention that, either.
Don't pay no mind to the demons
They fill you with fear
Shiro is…
Shiro was a legend, back home, back before this all. Stories around the kitchen table, stories of appreciation from Dad and admiration from Matt.
"He's the best pilot I've ever seen," says Matt with a star in his eye.
"Yes, and he's very responsible," agrees Dad. "It's a pleasure working with him."
Shiro was a legend but now.
Shiro is the man who crashed a Galra pod on Earth. Shiro is the man who brought the stars to her path and carried news of her family.
Shiro is the one who first discovered her secret.
Shiro is the one who leads them. Who supports them.
Shiro was a legend but now he's family.
"Hey," he says when she's been working too long. "Get some sleep."
"Pidge," he says when she's curled up in the window watching the stars. "They're out there. We'll find them."
They're in a battle and she's too slow to dodge and a blast from a Galra sentry's gun clips her side hard enough to cut through her armor and through her skin. She presses a hand to the wound and it comes away red.
Someone yells her name. Feet pound in her direction and strong arms catch her as she falls.
"Pidge," says Shiro. "Pidge. Pidge!"
She blinks up at him blearily. "Sh-shiro."
"Pidge stay with me. Pidge. Pidge, keep your eyes open. Pidge. Pidge! Katie!"
Everyone's shouting. Everything's too loud. Too much.
Pidge's eyes roll back in her head and everything goes dark.
Shiro is the one who carries her back to the lions. He's the one who stays in the back with her while Keith pilots and Lance and Hunk's worried voices filter through the speakers.
Everything's a haze, but Shiro's voice is a constant reminder to stay awake.
Shiro refuses to place her on the hovering stretcher that Allura has ready for them. Instead he carries her to the medical pods.
"Matt?" she asks.
He inhales sharply as he sets her gently in the pod. "No. It's—it's Shiro."
"Don't leave again," she pleads, delirious. She doesn't want to lose her brother. Not again. She just found him.
"I won't."
"Please…please don't leave."
"We'll be here, Pidge. We'll be here when you wake up."
The trouble it might drag you down
If you get lost, you can always be found
Pidge opens her eyes on the inside of a healing pod.
Blearily she shakes her head free of the fog. The pod opens and she looks out on her frien—no.
Her family.
They're all shouting. Hunk's crying. His strong arms wrap her in a hug and then the rest follow his lead, all of them holding each other and laughing until someone trips over someone else and somehow they're all on the floor.
"I'm okay," she insists. "I'm okay."
"Never do that again," orders Keith, but he sounds choked up.
"Okay," agrees Pidge.
Okay.
Just know you're not alone
Pidge works so she doesn't have to sit still.
Home is so far. Mom and Dad and Matt are beyond her reach.
But she's not alone.
She's part of a team now. A team that's more than a team, more than a group of friends in the vastness of space.
They're a family.
And it's in the small things that she's reminded. When Hunk bakes her cookies, when Lance loses their games, when Keith ruffles her hair, when Shiro is there for her to lean on.
They're a family and this castle is home.
Pidge smiles out the window and inhales the stars.
Cause I'm going to make this place your home
