Yu-gi-oh Abridged the Zexaled series
Script: episode 7
Title: Not so best friends
Cast: Yuma, Tori, Bronk, Astral, Number 96, guy who had 96
The episode Begins in Yuma's room, Yuma is in his hammock trying to sleep, while Astral is watching T.V
Astral: (while watching the power rangers intro and singing along to it) go go power Rangers, deh deh ne en Go Go Power Rangers de neh nene Rangers Forever Power so forvever, dee Go go Power Ran-
Yuma: Astral go to bed, some of us are trying to sleep
Astral: yeah and I get bored when your sleeping, so what else am I supposed to do
Yuma: I don't know sleep maybe
Astral: I don't need to sleep Yuma I tried it once sucks, and usually all I do while your sleeping is go into my kaleidoscope and that's boring, plus Ever since we got Shockmaster he's just been a dick he picks on Utopia all the time it gets real occurred
Yuma: that's nice Astral
Astral: how could you just say that it's your ace monster
Yuma: I have a test tomorrow and I need to get my sleep
Astral: besides The magic box is wonderful, it tells me things all the time, like to kill all my enemy's, maybe that's my mission Yuma, to kill all who oppose me
Yuma: thats stupid Astral, you're not here to kill anyone, now please turn the T.V off
Astral: no
Yuma: (sighs) alright tell you what, if you turn the T.V off, I promise to get you a number card tomorrow
Astral: really
Yuma: yes, just go to bed
Astral: ok
Yuma: thank yo-
Astral: Right after this hour-long power ranger special
Yuma: (screams into his pillow)
Intro
The next scene Yuma is dueling the Guy who Has 96 while Tori and Bronk Watch
Guy who has 96: now you big Meany I overlay my 3 giant germs and xyz summon number 96 Dark mist
Tori: he summoned his number
Bronk: yes he did Tori, in this very epic duel that's been going on
Yuma: If you think I'm intimidated by that sludge ball you got another thing coming, Utopia attack Dark Mist with rising sun slash
Astral: wait a sec
Bronk: you fucking (Utopia destroy Dark Mist and wins)
Guy who has 96: oh poopy
Astral: oh ok then
Yuma: and that's how a bad ass does it hold your applause
Next scene Yuma, Tori and Bronk are walking
Tori: surprised you actually wanted to go get a number
Yuma: yeah well I promised Astral WHO KEPT ME UP ALL NIGHT
Astral: deals a deal I won't watch T.V when you sleep
Yuma: good your just lucky the test wasn't too bad (while Tori and Yuma are talking the camera is on Bronk who looks like he is getting annoyed)
Tori: it wasn't so bad except of question 13
Yuma: oh my god I hate questions like 13, the ones where there are two answers that both seem like they can work, but only one is right because its worded differently uh
Tori: I ended up going with C
Yuma: I picked B so one of us got it wrong
Tori: damn, I mean I defiantly want A, but I also feel like D also could have worked
Yuma: lets just hope it wasn't D then, hey Bronk what did you put for question 13? Bronk?
Bronk: I don't care
Yuma: did you not answer it, it wasn't that bad
Bronk: no forget about the stupid test
Tori: jeez what's with you all of a sudden
Bronk: sorry but I can't get over how dumb Yuma was in that duel
Yuma: what? Are you talking about the one for 96?
Bronk: yeah, I mean well you were just so stupid that thinking about it is giving me Boston Ra- (Yuma slaps him) ow what the hell
Yuma: NO NONE OF THAT shame on you
Bronk: WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR
Yuma: for thinking that your allowed to make that joke, let alone be worthy enough to make it
Bronk: oh so your just mad because I'm calling you out
Yuma: first the joke and the duel are separate issues, and don't act like you didn't deserve that smack
Bronk: ok fine, fine maybe I deserved the slap but that dosent change the fact that you made a bad move
Yuma: what are you talking about?
Bronk: um hello, when you attacked that guys number you just went straight in
Yuma: your point
Bronk: my point is that could have very easily been a trap and of you had lost then Astral would have died
Astral: that is true
Yuma: good point, counter point I can't be expected to be stopped by my opponent just because he may have a facedown or has a monster on the field that I don't know about, sometimes it's a bluff like it clearly was in that duel sometimes the only option is to spring the trap and work from there especially considering we can't read our opponents card effects for some reason, not that it matters since no one does in the real game either
Astral: that's also true
Bronk: but what happens if next time that happens its more than just a bluff
Yuma: I just said I continue from there, your acting like I didn't have a potential plan, but I did, Utopias abilty would let me negate his own attack, and if he were destroyed I had a way to get him back, so it was worth the risk
Astral: wow that's very well thought out you really are getting better
Bronk: Well I'm certain that Astral agrees with me that you were to reckless
Yuma: no in fact he literarily just praised me for my plan
Bronk: your lying
Yuma: no I'm not
Astral: no he's not
Bronk: yes you are
Yuma: he is literally agreeing with me not you
Bronk: ok I have an idea I'm going to have a thumb up and a thumb down, in one of my hands and Astral Thumbs up being me Down being you he picks whichever one he agrees with
Astral: oh good more of this, (Astral moves into position) the right one is yours Yuma
Yuma: he says the right
Bronk: you cheated and changed it
Yuma: are you for fucking real, you know what I should expect something like that from one of the worst characters from this show and Yu-gi-oh overall
Bronk: what exactly does that mean
Yuma: I'm going to be blunt, I realize that Zexal is not the most popular Yu-gi-oh anime in fact people either hate this show with a passion or they love it, but even among the people who do like it they can at least agree they don't like you
Bronk: where do you get that kind of logic
Yuma: well for one your supposed to be the "best friend" you know like the Joey or the Cyrus or the Crow, but you never do anything for me except be a dick to me, even after I saved your deck from Shark you still shit on me, your just an ass, on top of that your personality is horrible and you're not appealing to look at
Bronk: and most people think that your gay
Yuma: is that really your argument wow, fan girls love to make the main character gay in Yu-gi-oh and it's not like I don't get shipped with girls, in fact by the end of the series I can be shipped with four different Girl, and that's nice because I'm not gay, but even if I was at least I would still find love while not even a blind pansexual would find you attractive, so while I get all the woman you can enjoy your one-way
Bronk: oh really funny you wanting to date real girls, especially considering I figured you'd be more in to 2d chicks anyway considering you read hentai
Yuma: wha- what I – I don't read hentai
Tori: oh my god you do
Yuma: no, no I don't and where did you even hear that from anyway
Bronk: Cathy told us
Yuma: what?
Bronk: in fact she said, and I quote "he loves anime girl ass and all the things you do to it
Yuma: but how the hell would she….. oh, oh that, that is actually very concerning but for another reason, point is I don't read hentai
Tori: guys please stop fighting
Bronk/Yuma: Stay out of this
Tori: ok (scared)
Bronk: say what you will about me, but you are defiantly a shitty character
Yuma: not likely cause any one who has bothered to watch Zexal just not the dub, would know that I have a huge amount of character development, besides my Utopia duel wields friekin Zangetsu's for swords, that basically makes me Ichigo
Bronk: did you real just call yourself Ichigo
Yuma: I can see a ghost, who has helped me and changed my life as I assist it in his quest, I have beaten unbeatable odds, purify those who are evil, and have crazy hair so yeah Ichigo
Astral: I guess that makes me Zangetsu then
Bronk: you're not frickin Ichigo, you barely qualify as a shitty Yugi remake
Yuma: that's still better than you since you're a shitty B.O.B remake from monsters vs aliens!
Bronk: alright that's it I'm out
Yuma: oh what can't handle me can you
Bronk: eat a dick
Yuma: Screw yourself you fuck Nugget
Tori: Yuma, Bronk, guys
Next scene Yuma and Astral are now alone at the roof of his school
Yuma: I swear everyone in this show can be described with the fowling sentience, "Blank is/was a dick to Yuma" and like a maximum of five people don't qualify for it one of which is me and two others because I barely interact with them
Astral: you know that's been bothering me for a while now you and Bronk don't seem to like each other very much so why exactly are you friends let alone hang out
Yuma: were not really friends more like, I'd say rival for lack of a better word because that is not accurate ii would say acquaintances but that's not right either
Astral: explain please
At the same time Tori asked Bronk the same question and he is telling the same story in there class
Tori: seriously why do you guys hate each other
Bronk: well Tori it stretches back to when we first meet in Kindergarten, you see Yuma was being an idiot I called him out he challenged me to a duel and I beat him
Astral: and that's how you became acquaintances
Yuma: yeah basically you see one of the biggest problems people have with me is that I come off as a well, I'll put it like this, I won't claim that I was the best duelist before the start of the show, however I also won't say I lost every duel I was in I did have some wins my problem was that I'm in middle school right now and I didn't know the rules to the game all that well yet and also only have cards that I basically got from random booster packs, essentially I am every kid who ever played Yu-gi-oh in middle school but no one admits or realizes it
Bronk: Me on the other hand my parents got me this super awesome deck with unbelievable combos
Yuma: he had this FTK that if it were real would get banned faster than you could say Substioad, and Bronk would always want to duel me specifically so he could rack up wins against the protag before he was any good
Astral: I see where this I going now
Bronk: I basically became one of the only people I would let Yuma dueled so I could keep winning
Yuma: and its not like he ever say gave me pointers or helped me no he just kept beating me, so he could rub it in my face when the series started
Astral: that is very mean
Yuma: I had no way to protect myself either, so I had to take it and try as much as I could to avoid him
Bronk: it's why I can be an asshole to him and I guess why he tries to be one to me
Tori: that is really mean Bronk, like What The F
Bronk: well that's what you get for having spiky hair.
Later on in the park Yuma and Bronk see each other and brush each other off
Tori: (walking up to Yuma) ok enough of this Yuma you need to apologize
Yuma: what, why do I have to you know he's an ass
Tori: yeah I heard the story from him, and yes he is an ass, but you guys are still my friends and I don't want you fighting, besides think of it like this now you can go and beat him as many time as he di you now
Yuma: I'd rather just avoid him he sucks
Tori: well if you don't I'm going to believe that you do read hentai
Yuma: are we still on that I don't (Tori stares at him with stink eye) (exhales) fine I'll be the bigger man
Tori: good answer
Yuma: (walking up to Bronk) hey Bronk wait a sec (Suddenly Bronk sees Yuma approaching and back hand s him knocking Yuma's key off and sending Yuma to the ground) ow
Tori: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT BRONK
Bronk: he was coming at me you saw it
Tori: he was going to apologize,
Yuma: yeah what the fuck asshole
Bronk: like I believe that
Tori: ok you know what I'm officially on Yuma's side now
Yuma: thank you Tori, and know what screw you Bronk (While Yuma says this something happens to his extra deck as something comes out of it as Bronk and Tori) I can't believe you don't even attempt to be likable your such dick
Tori: um Yuma
Yuma: hold on I'm not done yet
Bronk: Yuma look behind you, get away
Yuma: why what's wrong (Yuma looks behind him and notices the black goop and then it attacks him) AHH WHAT Is THIS ASTRAL (Astral is also being attacked by the substance)
Astral: DO NOT WANT STRANGER DANGER STARANGER DANGER
Yuma: what's going on, what's happening
Astral: Yuma quick give Bronk Utopia
Yuma: but
Astral: give fatso the card YUMA
Yuma: ok, Bronk catch (Yuma throws Bronk Utopia)
Bronk: what, Utopia wait your key
Astral: Get it off me get it - (Astral is then absorbed by the goo)
Yuma: Astral (suddenly Number 96 emerges from where Astral is taken and manifests itself)
96: not quite
Yuma: I don't want this no no no no nonononononononon (Yuma is restrained) Why what's happening
96 (sounding like a half way decent Megatron): I'm happening (Number 96 reveals himself)
Yuma: what the hell
96: sup bitches
Tori: is that Astral
96: Astral no, I'm not Astral I am Number 96 Dark Mist
Yuma: you're the number I won yesterday
96: oh good your attention span is longer than I thought, and with Astral gone step 1 is complete now for step 2 re-acquiring Utopia (96 lashes out his tentacles trying to attack Bronk and get Utopia)
Bronk: eep (Just as 96's tentacles are about to reach Bronk Yuma's key glows and protects him)
96: damn I guess you really can't just steal these things
Tori: I don't understand what you are
96: I already told you I'm number 96
Bronk: we got that but how
96: well I suppose since I can't simply take the number I'll tell you, you see I'm more creative than my other number brethren as I can't simply be pacified by Astral like the other numbers you have and so I came up with a plan to find you lose a duel and be "captured" and then absorb Astral
Yuma: if that was your plan why did you wait till now
96: because unfortunately your key was the only thing preventing me from doing so and you didn't take it off last night, luckily your fat and very rude friend here helped me tremendously by bitch slapping you
Yuma: also, why specifically lose the duel and not just try to win
96: right beat a protag like that's going to happen
Yuma: well I mean I am an underdog character, so it could happen
96: not in a duel that kills Astral, its just not happening, besides even if I did win it's much more beneficial if I were to absorb Astral and take his powers, and I even get the main character and can use you like a puppet, could you imagine the main Character being evil the whole time
Yuma: eh sounds interesting in concept but then you don't have the main character saving the day so it just really dosent end up by working.
Bronk: didn't that already happen in GX?
96: I was thinking of a higher scale of it, you know what it dosent matter, what does is that I need that number you now have
Bronk: I ain't afraid of you evil Astral thing
96: good that means you won't mind dueling me, though technically you'll be dueling Yuma
Yuma: What?
96: of course, you're my new puppet after all, and this will be a good way to test out the strings
Yuma: no way in fact Bronk dosent need to accept, if your stop just from not having Utopia then we can find a different way to stop you
96: now that sounds bold and brave, but you may want to consider your surroundings after all your currently tied, up by tentacles, and you're an anime character I assume you've read enough Hentai to know what will happen next
Yuma: (looking horrified) you wouldn't
96: try me
Yuma: (a pan to Bronk and Tori respectively both looking terrified along with Yuma) you got yourself a puppet
96: good answer (96 releases Yuma)
Yuma: now Bronk I now we are mad at each other and things were said but please help, and if you don't do it for me the do it for Astral or at the very least do it for my butt or whatever just please help
Bronk: I know we might still be fighting but I don't want to see that happen to you at all, I don't even want to think that that's happening to you, so I'll help you
Yuma: thank you
Tori: I do have to admit that would be kinda hot
Yuma: TORI!
Tori: what I mean not the whole you being in danger part
Yuma: Screw you, if our positions were reversed and I said that you'd hate me for ever
Tori: ok jeez I'm sorry
96: can we please get this over with
Bronk: lets Duel
The duel starts
Yuma: now just for the record I know you guys think I read hentai, but at least believe me when I say I don't do tentacle porn
Tori: I don't think this is the right time for this
96: all that means is that you totally do its just not as bad
Yuma: can you please go to hell
Bronk: I'll go first and activate my gear spring catapult, next I summon Aye Iron and equip him with sprig punch, then with Aye Iron's effect I raise is attack by 400 causing me equip spell to instantly deal 1000 damage to you
96: aw how cute a 1000 burn damage, now if that's all you you've got then it's time to get out of the kiddie pool, by using the effects of both acorno and pinecorno respectively I can special summon them off of each other's effects and then summon darklon, activating its abilty increasing all the levels of monsters on my field by 1 making them level 2, now I overlay all three of my monsters behold and tremble as I now xyz summon myself number 96 Dark mist (Dark mist is summoned)
Yuma: what the
Tori: that's not how it looked yesterday
96: no shit I said I lost on purpose yesterday so no way I was going to show you my true form
Yuma: wait but shouldn't you look like that then or vice versa
96: shut up you and attack the kangaroo, at this time Dark mists abilty activates causing your monster to lose half its attack points while Dark mist gains them (aye iron is destroyed)
Bronk: damn so that thing saps attack huh, alright well now its my turn and I summon tin gold fish and activate iron call to revive my Aye Iron and use both to summon out number 39 Utopia (Utopia is summoned)
Yuma: yes
Bronk: (thinking damn what this is I feel, is this hat its like to be a protag, if so it's awesome) Utopia Attack Dark mist with your power up from my catapult (Utopia attacks)
96: oh, scary wait no its not thanks to Dark mists abilty once again I detach an overlay unit and cut your monster attack in half
Bronk: it works on both turns?
96: it works on both turns
Bronk: then is use Utopia's abilty to make that not happen
Yuma: wait so in our duel
96: oh yes it would have been far from over though you could have just done what your friend did, so it would have been still up in the air, then again that guy was running giant germ, so you probably would have won, does that make you feel better
Yuma: go fuck your self
96: now be nice or I'll have to rip your vocal cords out through your pancreas, I mean I'll probably do it anyway so whatever
Yuma: what
96: I mean if your going to be my puppet then I'm going to make you a proper puppet, which would involve removing speaking functions
Yuma: I will die if you do that especially to my pancreas
96: well some of it may also just be for fun, personally I just like stabbing things
Yuma: I need to get out of this
Astral: (as an echoy voice) Yuma
Yuma: (thinking) Astral (Astral then appears but only slightly) Astral you're ok
Astral: no, I'm not I'm missing stuff I don't know what is happening to me,
Yuma: well he threatened to rape me so
Astral: oh, fuck no, well it's a good thing I have a plan
Back at the duel
96: I think its time to end this so hurry up I have a busy schedule
Tori: what exactly do you have to do that's so important
96: I … have to meet with some friends
Bronk: I set a card and then activate my automatic spring counter and end my turn
96: good now we can end this shit show of a duel, Dark mist Attack Utopia and use your abilty once again (dark mist destroys Utopia) (laughs lightly) and now you see how pathetic you really are, and now all you have are a bunch of counters, and those never work, so its time to get rid of that catapult
Bronk: go right on ahead and you'll see what happens
96: oh, I will
Yuma: WAIT (96 looks over at Yuma) don't you see his baiting you
96: what do you mean
Bronk: Yuma, what are you doing
Yuma: its his bullshit combo, gear spring exploder, when it activates it will remove all counters on the field and then you take 800 points for each one
96: if he uses it next turn that would be 3200 I'd lose
Bronk: WHAT THE HELL YUMA
Yuma: it's the bullshit way he always wins and its most likely that facedown, even if you take out the catapult there's nothing stopping him from using a different card to gain counters
96: well look who's being useful, I active xyz cyclone which destroys a spell or trap on your field if an xyz was destroyed this turn, which is literally one of the worst backrow removal I've ever heard of
Yuma: there's a reason he always beat me with it, it's because I can't get MST
96: fair enough, say bye to your bs chain burn (gear spring exploder is destroyed)
Bronk: damn it
96: good job Yuma, just for that maybe I won't tare your intestines out with your spine
Bronk: (thinking) what is he thinking does he believe I can't win and his trying to make his situation better for himself no I won't lose here I can't I'm supposed to be the best friend, his Joey, his Cyrus, his Crow I won't give up
96: you get the one turn now so make the most of it
Bronk: yeah, I need to, (Thinking) wait I still have my catapult and that things out of overlay units I can do this (out loud) by removing three gear counters from my field I can summon gear spring spirit which sends one of your monster's attack points to zero
96: what no I needed those, you know what it doesn't matter give me 100 points of damage that's all you'll do after all Dark mist can't be destroyed be non-number monsters
Bronk: I can fix that with monster reborn to bring back Utopia
96: no that can't be right (Yuma starts to laugh) what the hell are you laughing abut what did you do
Yuma: tricked you that's what I manage to convince you to leave his catapult alone, in fact even knowing about the trap it still would have been the better card after all if it was his intention to use the trap he could have just chained it to your spell
96: you BEYTRAYED ME WHY
Yuma: are you serious, you absorbed my friend and then threatened to rape and dismember me why on earth would I help you, your just an idiot
96: you little
Yuma: Bronk!
Bronk: with gear spring Catapult I increase Utopia's attack to 3000 and have him destroy Dark mist ending this duel (Utopia destroys Dark mist and defeats 96) hey Yuma Catch (Yuma catches his key)
Astral: Hey number 96
96: no, you should be gone
Astral: get out of my body, I'm so locking you up in the basement (he reabsorbs 96)
The aftermath of the duel
Yuma: so, thanks for saving me Bronk
Bronk: eh I owed you one, lets just go back to being kinda of friends
Yuma: I can get behind that
Astral: I'm glad there uh friend's sure friends again, and I really hope you're not important 96 like potentially the most important number I can get.
End of episode
