Note: This is my first story ever, so any feedback will be appreciated. This story is inspired by the "Blue Whale App" and contains self harm and possibly other forms of abuse which I will state in each chapter so you have been warned. Also apologies if the format or paragraphs seem wonky or weird. I'm literally copying and pasting from googledocs. I'm also typing whole chapters in one go so let's see how that turns out :P I hope you all enjoy!
Swipe. Swipe. Swipe.
It's what I do best. Definitely the best way to spend my Friday night. I could be out with my girlfriend Wendy, but she would have just dragged me to the mall or out with her other basic white girl bitch of her friends. I honestly think she's out getting drunk at the bars. Must be nice turning 21. Don't get me wrong, I love her as a person. But I don't love her. She doesn't know that I'm using her, she doesn't know that she's just a coverup to hide the fact that I, Stan fuckin' Marsh, is a raging fucking homosexual and I really, really, reeeaallyy do not want people to know that. You know what would happen to me if that got out that I was gay? I mean, have you seen the people in this town? Full of rednecks and conservatives. I don't even know how Token and his family puts up with it. Always getting called the taboo word by the older men who still think it's the 1950s when he walks by. I think I'd rather blow my brains out than be tormented with cruel words and being forced to look over my shoulder everyday. So yeah, I honestly don't care if I keep lying to Wendy, and I certainly don't want to be discriminated like Token.
If I fucking didn't think my life could get any worse in the love and sexuality department just get this: I am head over heels in love with my best friend Kyle. He's everything I ever wanted in a guy. Smart, funny, kind, cute, nice ass. Yes, I have seen it, and more than once too. Shout out to freshman gym class. He's my first love and it hurts me to not be able to tell him. If I can't have him I'd find some other way to fill the void in my heart.
Tinder, Grindr, whatever I use to find easy men who are up for a no strings attached romp in the sheets, or hey, even behind a cheesy poofs factory, now that was a fun time. Though I couldn't help but think of fatass since it's been his go-to snack for the past 10 years. I could only finish because they dude had some of the sexiest moans I ever heard. Ugh, sometimes just looking at Eric just makes me cringe. I'm not going to say that I like him, or that he's even my friend, but we've been through hell and back so we kinda have a bond that can't be broken. Even if we drifted apart these past few years.
A sudden ding takes me out of my thoughts and I look back down at my phone. It was a match and a message. Finally all that hard work swiping and sending other guys messages finally paid off. Great. My plans are to set up a date for tomorrow so I can do my thing. Fuck and then ghost. It's exciting and thrilling. I know that makes me a huge asshole but hey, I do make it clear that sex is all I want, so I can't be the one to take all the blame. I always have a strict routine on how I contact these men and how I go about meeting them. Have I mentioned before how much I really don't want to be caught a mile deep in the closet?
I always go out of town to meet them, usually Denver. It's a pretty big city with a pretty vast and diverse gay community which is nice. I never make them come to me, and I never tell them where I'm from. I never go out with the same guy more than once, that's how strings get attached and I don't want that. I'm only 20, way too young to be settling down. I mean if that were even an option for me. I don't have to worry about someone from Southpark finding me on the apps because everyone is either too old to know how to use the apps or anyone my age thinks you're a "Loser pussy bitch" name courtesy of Kenny if you have to use a dating app to help you find some poon, well in my case some dick. After setting up appointments I even delete the apps I use so I don't accidentally leave them on my phone for someone to find. Mostly my sister, nosy bitch. 24 years old and still acts like she's 13 half the time. Fucking ridiculous dude. I even have one of those texting apps so I don't have to give out my real number. I'm honestly surprised these people don't think I'm a creep or a murderer by how little I talk about myself. I give my name and a picture of my face and that's it. I guess that's all you really need if all you want to do is fuck someone.
First I checked out the messengers profile. I'm sure I looked at it before when I decided to swipe left but I can't remember them all. Then I remembered why I swiped in the first place. I even super liked him. First picture I saw was a thick almost porcelain ass almost spilling out of a tightly fitted pair of black booty shorts,his hand on a cheek spreading himself ever so slightly inviting you to take control and dive right in. Damn what a fucking tease. I was definitely thinking with my other head when I saw that. Second one was a selfie. He wasn't exactly slim, and he wasn't exactly a normal build, kinda like a happy medium between the two, which is exactly what I want. Can't fuck a twig, and I can't fuck a guy as buff as me. I'm not exactly a muscle man, but I do hit the gym once or twice a week. I'm strong enough to pick up Wendy when she thinks it's a great idea to leap into my arms when it's been a couple days since she's seen me.
But what really got me, besides the body type which was almost fucking perfect for me was his facial features. He had soft honey brown hair, fluffy, slightly longer, shaggier, but still well kept. Kind that makes you want to run your hands through. Eyes a deep hazel with a bright leafy green ring around the pupils. Plump pink lips, a well sculpted nose and freckles peppered over the bridge of his nose and high cheek bones. All of it was brought together well by a pair of thick rimmed circular very hipster glasses that if I had to guess are for style not necessity. It reminded me so much of him. He literally couldn't be anymore perfect. Fucking score.
New message request from : Noah.
Noah: Hey. Thanks for the like!
Stan: Haha you're welcome. What can I say? I can't resist a nice ass ;) plus that face is pretty cute. What are you looking for on here?
I never liked getting into deep conversation, like I said before, it gets strings attached, makes things a lot harder and messier for me in the long run. I always try my best to get to the chase.
Noah: Oh wow, lol I think we both have the same thing in mind. Where are you located? I'm on the south side of Denver. I mean...you are pretty fucking hot. Love those blue eyes. I just gout out of a relationship so I'm looking to get back out there...have some fun if you know what I mean.
Stan: Haha, I'm not too far out. But I can come to you. Maybe treat you to a meal. I'll have you know right now that I'm not looking for anything long term, but who knows, maybe that ass will make me change my mind. ;P
Noah: lmao no its cool dude, I'd like to sample a couple flavors before I settle on one I like myself.
Denver, especially the south side where his soon to be sex partner Noah was almost a 3 hour drive. But for a piece of ass and a me being a horny young man it was worth it. The next couple messages were of small talk, which is almost a given with any conversation, even though I don't really like it. We set up a time and date for tomorrow night at 6 o'clock t o meet at a small restaurant called The Melting Pot. Sounds good to me. We finish the conversation by telling each other goodnight.
I looked at the time of my phone and realized how late it really was. Guess it was pretty late. Almost 2 o'clock in the morning. Time really does go fast when you're not really doing anything. I had a summer job but now of course Summer had ended weeks ago and I'm pretty much mooching off my parents. Which is okay for now. At least mom doesn't mind. Dad is a different story. Ever since he got laid off from being a geologist and has spent the last 3 years doing odd jobs just to barely make ends meet. My summer jobs are to help the family out. So me not working and mooching has my dads panties in the biggest fucking wad. But I don't want to think about that right now. I just wonder what excuse I'm going to come up with when I have to tell people that I'm going to be gone for most of tomorrow. I don't want to took my own horn but I am pretty fucking popular. So my guess is someone's going to ask to hang out and I'll have to give them some bullshit because I can't just leave them with a 'no I can't hang out' And as it was fate my phone dinged once more with a text message. This one was from a drunk Wendy. Seems like she was at the bars.
Wendy: Niiithg Stba, i lovvvveeee yiu. 3
It's better to tell Wendy now that I'll be gone tomorrow. Drunk Wendy literally doesn't give a shit about anything. One time we were at Clyds drinking, big party, and her best friend Bebe was flirting with me hardcore with me right infront of Wendy and she just sat there with a stupid grin on her face like she thought it was funny. I didn't really care, I was too busy checking out someone else.
Stan: looool, goodnight. Hey, I gotta go do something in Denver tomorrow, they have that huge vinyl storet that's closing down so I'm gonna get in on those hella deals. I'll be gone most of the day. Sorry. Make sure you drink water. You sound fucked up.
Wendy: k hwatevr. Fuck u n fck watr. Nihhgt.
I mean it's a pretty shit excuse but Wendy will be so hungover that she won't even want to do anything tomorrow anyway. So that's one person I won't have to worry about. Okay but seriously, I'm getting tired as fuck and sleep is starting to sound more and more good. So after doing my ritual of deleting all evidence of my presence of my beloved dating apps I closed my eyes after settling down in my bed and making myself comfortable. I tried not to think about tomorrow too much, going to sleep with a boner seems weird and uncomfortable.I felt my eyes grow heavy and everything grow darker and darker. Soon, sleep graced me.
Hmm...could you tell who Stan was thinking about when he was talking to Noah
I wonder? :P Next chapter gonna get hot and heavy so get ready for that! Thanks so much for reading, like I said before any feedback is welcome!
