Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck or Blair, or Gossip girl. They are Cecily's rightful property, thought I wish they were real and making babies with headbands and bowties.

This fic is dedicated to my wonderful and awesome Riml (Ohchuckles) because she dedicated her fic to me and encouraged me to write this along with my Catherine (Blaireffinwaldorf). Also lots of love to the amazing (Maribells) for beta-ing this for me.

I've never written a fic before, or attempted one in any capacity, so this is my first fic ever. The writing will certainly show it. I just thought i should put It out there.

This is set as a continuation of the last scene of 5x24 at the Casino table.

Chapter 1

"Bass." the word carried with it charged gravity. She wanted at the least a conversation. That much he deduced from the way she showed up like she owned the place. But when she said his name, twice now, He heard the command but also the layers of vulnerability underneath her sugary tone; almost as if she were the one waiting for a verdict to be read as opposed to the one with the verdict to hand out.

When she said she was going to fight for him, it was declarative, she wasn't asking for permission. What exactly was she expecting from him? However, he didn't move to say anything, mostly because he didn't believe he had anything pleasant to say to her. He just continued to stare at her with wide eyes like a deer caught in headlights.

"Bass" she nagged teasingly, when he still didn't respond, switching to a more playful tone. Her serious composure lasted only a minute before she started feeling self conscious and decided to play it down. She swept her boy a little closer to him, leaning her Chanel No. 5 scented neck right where she knew his olfactory glands would catch it. She was coaxing him to say something - anything - whatever would make sitting there and having the croupier stare at her pitifully…And Chuck's fully dilated pupils transfixed on her, completely dumbfounded, slightly more bearable.

Chuck opened his mouth as if he were about to respond to her new easy-going bait, but then he closed it and just pushed his tongue into the inside of his jaw. He looked contemplative as Blair watched him for a second. Then, his forehead rippled a little in thought and he inhaled.

Blair mentally rolled her eyes back at his slow reception.

The croupier drummed a couple of his fingers on the table, subtly hinting to the couple lost in their exchange that he was waiting on their word to proceed.

When a few more seconds passed and Chuck still hadn't uttered a word, Blair suddenly looked straight at him and erupted in laughter, gripping at the table with one hand for support as she posed her other over her heart to steady her heartbeat.

"Oh! Bass" she squeaked out through her exhilarating tears of laughter, and it sounded like a plea, both teasing and sad.

A trace of a smile started to appear on Chuck's face as he watched Blair completely seized by her laughter, completely and uncharacteristically unguarded in front of him, like she hadn't been in years. And it abruptly made his insides churn anew with all the emotions he reserved for her.

He couldn't help the gush of joy that started bursting through his veins at the image of Blair in front of him, her nose scrunched, her eyes shut tightly, and her mouth stretched making a show of her beautiful set of pearly whites and those lips that he never got tired of admiring. He could only think how 'cute' she was in that moment. Cute? He pondered to himself. That would be what you call a pet. He imagined Blair would find quite a bit of offense in that word. But in that moment, he could only see the dorky girl on display, and he realized he quite liked that girl. Even if dorky girls weren't his cup of tea, every version of Blair was his cup of tea. He was suddenly painfully conscious of how much he missed her, all the way down his body. He found the fact that she laughed at her own weird jokes in her head completely enthralling. He loved everything about this girl, he contemplated to himself.

He tried to turn his head away when he realized she had opened her eyes and was looking at him again. The smile was still on his face and had grown wider with him being lost in his thoughts about her. She caught him, and he knew it the exact moment she did.

"What was so funny?" he quickly asked, to beat her getting the lead on the conversation. He wasn't ready to let her call the shots after all. He was the one in need of answers anyway. He looked her straight in the eye, but this time his expression was more neutral and softer than before. He realized by now that she was here for a conversation. And this was a conversation he could avoid no longer, given the manner in which she showed up to make her declaration, to fight for him, to bet on him. What did that even mean? He didn't know what to think. It was something he had only dared imagine in dreams.

The croupier glared at the two people in front of him who were off in their own world, completely oblivious to his presence.

"Whenever you're ready" he announced pointedly.

Chuck could sense Guillaume? Whatever was his name was uncomfortable observing the melodramatic scene in front of him and so he gestured the croupier off and Guillaume immediately started chatting up a blonde at a nearby table.

"When have you ever run out of retorts for your name being called out over and over again?" Blair asked as soon as they were alone "Is it possible someone kidnapped the real Chuck Bass and replaced him with you? Did you know I said your name at least four times and you didn't get smug? You didn't even smirk for the record. And if that didn't do it, the expressions on your face were completely un-Chuck Bass, priceless!" She broke out in laughter again. "I think I may be right with that theory" she said even more teasingly this time. "You are failing miserably. I'm sorry to tell you. I think it's hilarious"

At this point, Chuck didn't know if he should keep this up with Blair for now or seriously ask her why she was there. He didn't want to be too snappy right off the bat, but he also didn't feel completely comfortable playing into her trick, pretending like nothing was the matter when there was a clear and obvious elephant standing right between them.

It just didn't feel right to him, and he didn't want to act like he forgot about everything just because she showed up. He wanted nothing more than to be back together with her. In fact, his lower body was definitely in agreement. And he knew he'd eventually get over everything, but he couldn't sit there and laugh with her just because she looked very beautiful when she laughed and he loved to stare at her doing so. Sure, he had managed to smile earlier but that was purely the physical effect she had on him. He hadn't willingly opened up to her again. She had much more talking to do before he gave her any inch. But for now, as much as he wanted to tell her to stop whatever she thought she was doing, when he looked at her, he couldn't help but succumb to her beaming face.

So he decided he wanted to see where she planned to go with this.

"I'm not failing that miserably, am I?" he replied in mock horror at the criticism, playing into her trick. "Don't I at least get points for the scotch?" he added playfully. Even though it wasn't his intention to give in; his mood suddenly lightened up as he uttered the words. He just couldn't resist what he felt for her.

"And I could say the same thing for you too" he continued, the words flowing. "You were literally snorting with laughter seconds ago. I know for a fact the real Blair Waldorf would never do that. She actually used to glare at me when I did." he remembered fondly.

Blair scrunched up her nose appalled by his commentary.

"Snorting?" she defended "I did no such thing. In which case, seems you're agreeing with my theory after all. The real Chuck Bass, despite his shortcomings, has never been a particularly good liar to me. And I certainly don't expect him to lie about something as absurd as me snorting. I don't snort." she scoffed at the absurdity of the possibility. "It's not very Waldorf-like. Me and Chuck, we always counted on each other for honesty. It kind of was our thing." She finished a little dreamily.

A moment later she shook herself out of her reverie.

"Anyway, you clearly are not him" she said with a little frown. He simply chuckled at her rant. It was endearing watching Blair be Blair.

"And please," she added with a roll of her eyes. "Me glaring at you was always for your own benefit. Don't you think it would have been cruel if I just watched you throw away 18 years of etiquette training for a stupid habit? You are much better now because of it, and you have me to thank for that. Do you not agree?"

"Do I not agree?" he replied, now completely amused. "How would I know the answer to that question given that I'm not the real Chuck Bass?" he demanded with a teasing raise of his eyebrow. "Unless you're saying that I am the real Chuck Bass?"

Apparently she had successfully trapped him into the conversation, because he temporarily forgot all the other nagging thoughts about her that were pestering his mind for days, weeks, months even. He was completely in the moment with her.

She readily raised an arm to swat him on the shoulder, his punishment for being too witty, but she immediately thought better of it. It seemed as though they were now enjoying each other's company effortlessly, only moments after her arrival. But, she didn't think they were at that place yet, where she could extend the teasing to physicality. She knew that would be an overstep for now. She was lucky they were even exchanging words – mere minutes ago, greeting each other was a labor, but she was very happy about it.

"Well, there's only one way to find out" she cleared her throat suggestively, smirking, "But it would certainly cause a scene. I guess we have to bypass It." she said smiling tentatively before falling into laughter again at the naughtiness of her own joke.

She watched for Chuck's expression, but he just swallowed and offered her a small sad smile. Once she stopped laughing, she offered him the same.

"However," she announced, attempting to cover up the awkward silence that started to fill between them "I will give you points for the scotch. And you didn't do half bad conveying his sense of fashion, I must admit. Freakishly, you even sound like him too. As far as looks, I'm going to hazard a guess that you cloned him and decided to wear it for the full effect. I wouldn't put it past you" she babbled on.

"What about the hair?" he asked flirtatiously, motioning his hands to show off his perfectly coiffed hair "One does not simply have Chuck Bass' hair." he added firmly as a matter of fact.

"Actually, I disagree." Blair started began, but Chuck cut her off.

"Waldorf," Chuck interjected, stopping Blair in her rambling. He sighed and his eyes twinkled with deviousness. He had something up his sleeve.

"Well," he began to say, his tone suspenseful. "Since you're having a hard time remembering yours truly, which is such a shame, really." He purred pausing a moment to smirk. "An idea rather brilliant just occurred to me. I'm thinking I should break out a few of those intimate secrets that I've been keeping since our time together." He said slowly watching her reaction.

Blair suddenly sat up straight and turned to glare at him.

"I'm sure you, along with the few eavesdroppers nearby, would like to be reminded." He whispered more languidly. "Would that do the trick? Would that satisfy your query, Waldorf?" he drawled. "I'm assuming the reason you're still glued to this chair is because you're waiting for an answer from me. And if I'm not the real Chuck Bass, I wonder what other reasons could there be."

He earned himself an even more soul penetrating death glare.

"You Basshole" she muttered hardening her face a bit more to show her disapproval.

"Seems like i quelled your suspicions. You know I'm always glad to satisfy you" he made his tongue work every word out just the way he knew would get to her.

"You're right" she replied "You are the real Chuck Bass. I concede. Only one person could master that sick level of sexual perversion"

"And only the real Blair Waldorf could pretend to be so dramatically revolted by it, when I know she's enjoying every bit of it."

"I am not enjoying this."

"Said the person who never stopped laughing"

Blair rolled her eyes ignoring the comment. She turned and noticed a waiter walking around the room in their direction

"Monsieur," she called out raising her pointer finger straight up for the waiter to notice.

She felt her throat go dry on the last syllable. She had been laughing quite a bit, tonight. She was definitely in need of a drink. And upon remembering where she was and who she was sitting across from, maybe two or three, or ten. The waiter approached her table and Blair picked a flute of champagne off the silver tray.

"Anything else I can get for you, Mademoiselle?"

Blair shook her head "Non, merci"

The waiter addressed Chuck briefly as well, who asked for a refill of his scotch. The waiter nodded and told him that his scotch would be brought over promptly.

When they were left alone again, Blair made a grimace to herself before taking a long drawn-out sip of her champagne. The liquid was cool and tasted heavenly rolling down her dry throat. She was already regretting that she didn't start drinking much earlier in the evening. They both sat there silently, while Blair sipped her champagne, until moments later when the waiter returned with the scotch.

Chuck took his scotch and placed it on the table as he nodded the waiter off with a low 'thank you'.

He sat up to fix his posture trying not to give away his awkwardness at being stuck next to Blair.

"Scotch, it's your favorite." Blair announced conversationally. He turned to look at her

"And champagne is yours." he returned.

'What do you think that says about us?"

"It's just your drink of choice. It doesn't say anything about you"

"Not necessarily to you. But I think it does, in general. I honestly believe there is some type of science behind all our preferences"

"Are you saying there's a science even behind my obsession with bowties?"

Blair giggled at his statement.

"Yes. I think there's a science behind your unnatural obsession with bowties. It says something about you. I would say, even the brand of phone you carry, your favorite travel destination, Even who you love"

"Blair." Chuck started to say, ready to make his own reply until he heard he last part of her speech and he instantly forgot what the conversation was even about.

Blair didn't speak for another moment either, but she mentally cursed herself for putting her foot in her mouth.

The lighthearted exchanges had been nice but Chuck had had enough. He couldn't look at Blair in the eye anymore without acknowledging the throb of pain that resounded against his chest at the sight of her.

"Blair" he trailed off with a heavy sigh, and then he stopped to look over at her. "I'd like to know why you're really here. Why are you here, Blair?" he asked, confusion and a certain fear laced in his voice.

They had been delaying this conversation ever since Blair arrived and sat down. They had attempted to cut some of the tension between them with the light jokes and teasing. Blair hadn't known what else to do when she called his name four times and he didn't say anything. She'd tried to get him to loosen up around her she'd known that their encounter would inevitably lead to this conversation. And given the way he was looking at her she knew he wasn't going to make it easy. She'd prepared herself for that. This conversation wasn't going anywhere until they had it and they both knew it at that moment.

Chuck picked up his glass and leveled it with his mouth tipping it upwards slightly and taking a swig of the liquid, into his waiting mouth. He reset the glass on the table with a bit too much force before turning to look straight at Blair.

She had been staring at him the whole time since he asked her that inevitable question. She watched as his mouth opened to receive the liquid and a spark of desire flicked her insides. She couldn't read him very well at that moment, but she knew he wasn't happy.

When he turned to look at her, he watched her earlier gaiety completely retreat and a solemn and dark expression settle on her face. She was thinking. And instantly her features tensed making her look much older and wiser than that dorky girl she was minutes ago with him.

He realized the moment was here, there was no delaying it any longer, so he moved to get up. They couldn't have this conversation at the table with so many people floating around. If he was going to tell Blair how he really felt, they needed some privacy.

Blair watched Chuck get up and moved to follow when he nodded his head at her in a silent confirmation. They swerved out through the tables past other people filing in with their richly-textured, colorful evening gowns and blinding diamonds. When Chuck turned into the hall, it was much quieter.

He stepped onto the marble floor, holding the door open, waiting for Blair to catch up to him. He looked back to see her mid-conversation, smiling politely at a fellow casino patron and graciously flaring the skirt of her dress in a subtle movement. He figured she probably got held back by someone commenting on her dress. It was quite a showstopper, if he dare say so himself. She noticed him then and nodded in his direction as he waited by the door.

Jack appeared from the hallway coming towards Chuck. He winked and looked as though he were about to say something, but when he noticed Blair striding towards them, he simply patted Chuck on the shoulder and passed by without a word.

Blair and Chuck rode the elevator up to his floor. Blair stared at the number panel the whole time and counted how many seconds it took to move up each floor, while Chuck kept alternating his weight between his two feet making an obvious show of his anxiety.

When the ding of the elevator sounded, Blair stepped off onto the landing of his floor and started walking ahead of him towards his suite. He watched her body move in front of him, her hips swaying a little more dramatically than her anatomy required.

She knew he must have been watching her and she wanted to play that game right now. Perhaps, she thought it'd get her somewhere with him tonight – because as much as this conversation needed to happen, she wasn't sure she was ready.

He didn't miss her cues either as he perused every movement intently, paying attention to the dip and shift of every curve in her very body-con evening gown. He decided he liked that color on her too, a lot. But who was he kidding? He liked every color on her. He relished the fact that she couldn't see the reaction on his face as he ogled her ass, because in that moment he was able to let himself go very far, and enjoy how sublime it felt.

He had missed her so much.

He had missed her body so much; her voice, everything about her, so much.

"You're ready to talk?" Chuck suggested tentatively, sliding the key into the door, as he reached his destination. He glanced at her and she flattened the line of the lips into a sad smile.

"As ready as I'll ever be, I guess" Blair shrugged with finality.

.

As they stepped into the suite, the room filled with almost palpable tension at the click of the door closing behind them. Chuck moved to get some distance from her and went to stand on the opposite corner next to the window, which revealed a beautiful view of the lavish Monegasque wealth on display. The room was densely decorated in classic Rococo style. Art adorned all over the walls. Gold satin drapes hung from the ceiling to the floor, and a relief of ruffles ran along the top of the walls circling the entire room. The furniture was neatly arranged in the middle of the room. Satin-covered chairs with metal arms gilded in 14-carat gold surrounding a glass-topped table. The walls were a soft cream color, ornate with little curvaceous patterns traced in gold, imitating the shape of the furniture.

Blair stood against the door, for a moment, taking in the richness of the room before walking towards Chuck until she was only a few feet away from him.

He heard her footsteps near but he didn't turn to her, keeping his gaze directed out the window.

Nobody spoke for a few moments, so Blair occupied herself with admiring the rug under her feet.

"Since you're here, I really want to know why." He said decisively, finally wanting to break the tension filled silence that was driving them to asphyxiation. He continued to stare out the window.

Blair took a second to study her impeccably manicured hands and rub her thumbs one over the other. She raised her head up from her hands to stare at the back of Chuck's head. And the look on her face, Chuck would have found it devastating if he were able to see it. She sniffed back a tear absent-mindedly and Chuck turned around to face her.

"Because I'm sorry." She admitted in a resigned tone, when their eyes finally met. She closed her mouth awaiting what his response would be, but Chuck didn't say anything. "And I want to make it up to you. I know you don't believe me now, but I will prove it to you, Chuck." she said firmly though her emotions were brimming right below the surface. "I just needed to find the powerful woman in me first. I hope you understand."

Chuck took a step closer to her, noticing the quiet assurance in her voice. She surprised him a little with how quiet she suddenly was, compared to her happy demeanor just mere minutes ago at the Casino table. It seemed as if she was already on the verge of tears and he wondered if the tone of his question had anything to do with it.

"I understand that." He reassured her calmly. "It's just everything else I don't understand."

Blair realized she had no right to cry in front of Chuck at that moment, to make him feel sorry for her. She knew that she deserved every bit of his coldness and bitterness for how poorly she had treated him all year. And she needed to be able to take it. It had been so easy for her to hurt other people yet when the tables turned, all she wanted to do was run.

But this was it. She needed to take this, take ownership of what she's done and maybe hope this wouldn't be the end.

"Chuck, I've put you through a lot this year." Blair sighed guiltily after attempting to rein in her emotions. "But I've also been through a lot myself. I was looking to fix my problems the easy way and I just ended up hurting a lot of people." she added remorsefully. "You have no idea how sorry I am for that."

She stepped forward and took Chuck's hand in her own to affirm what she was saying to him, squeezing his hand lightly. Chuck reached out and tentatively caught her wrist between his thumb and the palm of his hand. He stroked it a little, and then released it. She looked up into his eyes. Tears were already glossing their contours again.

"I just want you to know." She confessed. "I'm really grateful for the way you never gave up on me even though I did everything to push you away."

Chuck shook his head at her sadly.

"You're the one who taught me never to give up on people, Blair. I had my days and you never gave up on me then. I couldn't give up on you."

Blair smiled in acknowledgement.

"I couldn't do that then." she admitted to him."Do you think there's any chance we could work this out between us for good?" she continue after a pause "It's really sad when I think about it to myself now, how many times you and I missed the chance to be together. We'll never know what we missed those times." She resigned sadly. "If we miss another chance, I don't know if I can take it, Chuck."

"That's true" he agreed as he walked away from her and turned back to face the window. "We don't have the most fortunate timing in the world, but at least the upside of our tragic flaw is that when we do get back together, we get to spend a lot of time making up for the time we wasted."

"But that's not so true." Blair countered, moving to stand next to Chuck by the window. He looked down at her. He couldn't remember the last time he was this close to Blair alone together. It had been so long. His heart dropped a little in his chest.

"That's not really true." she repeated, more urgently this time. "Which is why it's so sad. We can try to catch up, to make up for lost time. We can try to make amends. But lost time is lost time forever. We can never really make up for it completely. You'll never be my first husband." She said sadly.

A little wave of pain crashed on Chuck at the reminder. He was already aware of this but it didn't deflate the blow to his gut when the full realization hit him again. This was one more thing he had to get over.

He thought about what he should say in reply but he realized he might as well go with the truth. He was sure she already knew how he felt.

"But I can always be your last husband. That's more important" He responded thoughtfully. He took her hand in his and they continued to stare down at all the bright lights together, this time with their fingers intertwined.

Blair felt hope enter her heart at Chuck's statement. She knew it could just be a supposition but she couldn't help that it made her heart beat a little faster in her chest, and her face quirk up with delight. This moment felt so perfect. They were having a serious conversation, yet the mood was relatively light between them. It was like nothing they ever experienced before .Normally it was all angst and fireworks and they preferred it that way. But this time there was sweetness to the exchange and Blair couldn't place her finger on the deviation. It seemed to happen so naturally.

"Did you know, that's all I ever wanted?" Blair said regretfully. "And somehow everything else happened."

Chuck couldn't help but smile quietly at that statement. It was too incredulous to think that all Blair ever wanted this whole time was to marry him and somehow ended up doing everything else but that, even when the opportunity presented itself.

"No, but it's true." she persisted. "I just need to be honest with you. I stopped running from my feelings. I want to be honest from now on." She stated definitively.

Chuck continued to look at her with an endearing admiration in his eyes.

"Now, I'm really glad all of that is over for me." She continued. "All I want is to fight for you. I want you to know that I'm not going anywhere until we make this work. Make you believe in me again, in the 'us' that I wrecked."

"Don't say it like that." Chuck quickly defended, finding Blair's load of self-accountability quite unfair. "It wasn't just you Blair. A lot happened. It's been years of us hurting each other and going back and forth. And a lot of that was my fault too" he admitted contritely. "But you know how sorry I am for those things."

"I do, and I forgave you a long time ago." Blair confirmed to him "I guess it just took me longer to forgive myself. But now, I have come to terms with it. I know I can trust you never to sell me for a hotel again." She stated matter-of-factly.

A tear glistened in Chuck's eye as his entire face dropped at Blair's admission. The tears had been at bay for a while now which is why he had faced the window earlier. However, this time he couldn't keep them from brimming to the hilt.

Blair heard him sniff.

"Don't cry." she implored him, grabbing his shoulder tightly and placing her head against the muscle of his forearm for comfort. He flinched at the gesture.

Chuck removed his hand that was entwined with hers bouncing rhythmically along their thighs and wipe his face with it. He closed his eyes and walked away from her to the mini bar across the room. He got there and installed himself on a stool. Blair turned to face his direction but didn't move up.

"No." Chuck said as a couple tears rolled down his cheek, however keeping his demeanor as collected as he could. "I should have never given any reason for you to believe I could hurt you, Blair. I failed you. It was the worst mistake of my life. Just because I've changed from that man I used to be doesn't make it any better."

"Chuck" Blair quickly corrected him. "One thing you did years ago does not define who you are. I hope you know that. You're a good person, Chuck." Blair insisted stepping forward "Look at everything you've done since. Look at the man you've become. The kind of man I want to fight for because I know you are the only man capable of bringing me true joy and happiness. You had brought me the opposite for some time and I didn't even want to believe you changed either, because I was scared of what that would mean if I entrusted my heart with you again. You have hurt me deeply, Chuck, but you've also made me the happiest I've ever been. And I don't believe you'd ever hurt me like that again. You've come so far. I watched it happen this whole year" she went on "And I may have been in denial but I wasn't blind. I hurt you so much and you're still so good to me. You never broke my heart the way I broke yours. I married another man for Christ's sake, when I knew I loved you."

Now it was Blair's turn to push away the tears. She couldn't remembered how many times she sent Chuck away after she told him she loved him just to go be with someone else who didn't even have her heart. But always, to ensure she was really just cruel, she left him with the tiniest bit of hope and a lifetime supply of hurt.

"You loved Louis too." Chuck reminded her.

"I cared for him." Blair confessed candidly. "But I've never loved anyone like I love you, Chuck."

"Not even Dan?" Chuck decided to ask since now was as good a time as any other.

He didn't know how he felt broaching this subject with Blair. A part of him felt really vulnerable to her because of it. He didn't know what he expected Blair to say about Dan but he was somehow sure it would crush him. Blair had chosen Dan over him before. The thought alone terrified him.

"I know this makes me look bad." Blair spoke hesitantly moving towards him to stand on the other side of the bar. "But I didn't love Dan" she swallowed the lump that had risen up in her throat. "Not like you're supposed to love the person you're with. Doesn't mean he didn't mean something to me, because he did." She clarified. "He had been there for me. But this whole year, I was too weak to give love to anyone, not even you. I guess I was attracted to the fact that he loved me so much more than I could imagine loving him and I just needed that for a while."

Chuck gazed at her with a frail understanding, but didn't respond immediately.

"How do I know it's not the same with me, now that you're over Dan?" he asked, vulnerability overcoming his voice.

Blair was taken aback by his question and flinched almost in reflex. She knew he had a right to question everything she said, but it seemed like they were getting closer and Chuck was being more understanding than she'd expected him to be originally. But his question startled her and put the lump back in her throat.

"How could you even say that?" Blair shot back in her defense, moving right up to the bar to be as close to Chuck as possible with only the physical barrier standing in between them. "I would never do that to you Chuck. I know my word must mean nothing, but do you really believe I'd do that to you?"

"I guess that's the problem" he admitted resigned, "I don't know what to believe anymore, Blair. I appreciate that you're here telling me you want to fix things because I want the same thing too. And I do believe your word in the present. I just can't take your promises. We all know how they always end for me" his voice tinged with melancholy.

"Can you really blame me?" he lamented aloud when she said nothing more in her defense. She couldn't hide the bite of his words from showing up on her face.

However, she had to admit he had a point. She had played his emotions all year. She had driven him to this place.

But even though she had somewhat mentally prepared herself for his cutting words, it still didn't stop the sting from twisting into her heart. She swallowed to regain her composure.

"How can I prove it to you Chuck?" she begged "I've never wanted anything more than I want us to work. You need to know that."

"I do believe that you mean that Blair. But the thing is, I can't be sure you won't change your mind tomorrow" he admitted.

"So what are you saying, Chuck? That we're not going to work? You won't even bother trying?" Blair retorted, her anger starting to rise at the harshness of his words.

"That's not what I'm saying." Chuck replied much calmer than she had been.

"Then what?" she demanded.

.

"I'm saying we need time. Every time we rushed into this, we crashed and burned. We need to take time to be sure, to heal. That's very important." He concluded.

She didn't respond.

"If we truly love each other like we say we do," He went on. "This is the only way it'll work. I don't want to just say I'm okay with this now because I'm not. We need time."

"I'm sorry." She said walking around the bar to stand directly in front of him. He offered her the stool next to him and she hopped up to sit on it, scooting her body as close to him as possible. She placed one hand on his thigh and stared down at it.

"What for?"

"For everything, but mostly for wasting time we'll never get back." she admitted regretfully.

"But we're young, Blair." Chuck soothed. "We have a whole future and plenty of time. Don't be sorry for that. It wasn't all for nothing. I learned to be a man in that time and I could never regret that." His voice sounded quite raspy and sensual close to her ear.

"You're right" Blair conceded, with a sigh, fiddling the fabric of his tuxedo pants between her delicate fingers. "I guess it wasn't a waste. Our time apart may have been somewhat good for us. I just can't help that I feel guilty for being responsible."

"It wasn't your fault. If the time had been right, we would have happened. We didn't happen because the time wasn't right." Chuck reassured her hopefully.

"Look how much you've grown up." She smiled at his words of encouragement as she looked up into his eyes. "Seems like you're the only one of us who did." she finished as her face dropped. Her head followed suit.

Chuck hesitated to speak - to find the right words he desperately needed to tell her in that moment. To say something reassuring like he knew Blair needed to hear, but she cut him off before he even formed a sentence in his head.

"I don't need a speech about how wonderful I've been." she whispered sadly "Because I haven't. You said we need to be honest with each other; I want to hold you to that. I don't want to be fed these lies that I know aren't true. I know I've been a horrible person, Chuck" Blair admitted tears springing to her eyes.

She couldn't stop the stream of tears down her face as she leaned into Chuck's chest and he rubbed her back soothingly, before his other hand moved up into her hair. In her heart, she couldn't yet make peace with the fact that she was responsible for the year that went wasted between them, the fact that it was her doing. Unlike Chuck who had something to be proud of, she harbored even more guilt because she didn't feel she gained anything out of it. If anything, she felt all she did was lose - her baby, her ambitions, her self-confidence. She just felt them all slip away from her and she was too trapped by her weaknesses to fight back. She almost didn't know who she was anymore. It had been her mother who had finally made her feel strong again. And Eleanor entrusting her with the company was the jolt of self-assurance she'd needed all along.

Now that she felt safe and comforted in Chuck's arms, Blair started sobbing even more frantically at the memory of all the pain she was feeling - all the hurt and all the resentment she held against herself since her life started going off the rails, if the car accident with Chuck wasn't metaphor enough for her life going off the rails. Blair spent the year in abysmal anguish. Her baby was something she never talked about with anyone or allowed anyone to mention around her. Blair felt very guilty about it but she just didn't think she was strong enough to deal with the pain.

"You've had a hard year" Chuck offered kindly "How could you not think you're strong? Look at everything that's happened to you and you're still here, fighting life with all your might. You came all the way here, across the world, to fight for me and you didn't even know how any of it would turn out. I meant what I said last year, Blair. You're the most powerful woman I know. And this year, you've proven that to everybody" He finished firmly.

"When I arrived in Paris," She quivered, though managing a sad but hopeful smile through her tears. Chuck quickly made a soothing noise and rubbed her back. "And found out you were here, I told my mother that I knew what I wanted and I was going to get it." Her tone was partially clipped because she had been crying so hard moments earlier.

Chuck hugged her tighter and held her. After a few moments the sobs faded away. Blair sighed against Chuck's shirt.

"Something about taking a leap of faith with you makes me feel strong" She announced her voice much stronger and sharper than before.

"I'm glad it does, but you should know that's not the only reason why you're strong." He assured her. "Sometimes, strength is not manifested just in what you're capable of. Sometimes it's the very thing you're incapable of. What you are not willing to do or compromise, your heart. You're incredibly strong if this is you following your heart."

"This is me following my heart." she confirmed concretely. "And it led me to you." She smiled into his chest at her own admission.

A smile also appeared on his face at that moment.

"Is that okay with you?" she bargained further "You never gave me an answer when I asked earlier. Are we going to be something, Chuck?"

"Did we ever stop being 'something'?" He replied his thumb still working all over her back. "To me there's only been a different variation of what that 'something' is."

"True" she acquiesced. "Like you once said, our pull is undeniable. We only stayed away so long cause we were such fools."

"And with our lessons learned, now we can be mature fools that are right for each other" He declared.

"I can agree to those terms." Blair jumped up from his chest to sit upright on her stool. She then took both his hands in hers. "So does that mean we're officially back together?" she asked gleefully.

"It means we're trying. Labeling what we are is only going to make this feel rushed." Chuck answered honestly.

"Yes, I agree." Blair said thoughtfully "We'll know what we are when we get there."

"I have a lot of personal stuff I need to figure out as well." Chuck explained in a subdued tone. "I will have to rebuild myself from scratch. My father took everything."

Blair turned to face him completely and coaxed his body to do the same until their knees were right up against each other. She then tipped her forehead to lean against his and gazed into his pained eyes.

"He took the quantifiable stuff but that's not everything, Chuck. He can't take your business genius, your integrity or your charisma. And he won't be able to stop you from being the great man you are destined to be." She stated vehemently, her enthusiasm and conviction matching that of a motivational speaker.

"Thank you for always believing in me." He murmured softly so only she can hear him though they were the only two people in the room.

"I will never stop believing in you. I'm sorry I was betting against you for so long." She said contritely.

"I'm sorry I gave you a reason to." He countered, his eyes gazing deep into hers, full of wonderment and peace.

"I love you, Chuck." Blair announced softly as she leaned in to gently brush her lips against his in a light show of affection. And suddenly the butterflies came alive inside him, fluttering against his chest. Heat started to rise in his body at an unprecedented rate.

"I love you too, Blair." Chuck returned against her skin, smiling at her and drawing a smile to her lips as well.

"And I'm in love with you" she sang to him.

"Every nerve ending in my body is in love with you, Waldorf."

"So what do you say we go show the world once and for all that we're truly a force to be reckoned with? Let's go make some money, Bass" Blair proclaimed with determination.

"I'll say yes to everything, my darling." Chuck replied grinning and beaming with happiness.

"Let me go freshen up then we can go back to the table. Okay?" she said as she rose from her stool.

She started walking ahead in front of him towards the bathroom of his suite. Chuck loved watching her walk in front of him. He licked his lips briefly tasting the residue of her kiss.

He and Blair were going to work this out, he was sure of it.

And he was so happy he thought he was going to explode.

.

Let me know what you guys think about this chapter. Thanks.