Well as much as I love my cracks, I guess a cannon never hurt anyone. Except maybe those on actual ships, which probably hurts a ton. Wait, what am I even talking about?…. . Moving on.

WARNING- Lemon (comes in chapter 2)

You Want Punishment?

Jellal rubbed his sore head as he walked through the dimly lit streets. He'd known that the Fairy Tail of seven years ago was a party guild. But to him, It seemed like the Fairy Tail mages had a different definition of party than most people. They partied so Goddamn hard that his ears were still ringing from the uproar at the bar.

He made his way to his quarters- though he took part as Mystogan from Fairy Tail in the Grand Magic Games, he still kept his distance from them, more or less.

He stayed in a secluded hut, some way away from the actual town. Clearly, it wasn't in the least bit suspicious.

Through the window he spied a faint yellow glow. "Oh damn, don't tell me I forgot to turn off the lighting lacrima before I left," he frowned lightly.

But when he fully opened the door and walked in, he was in for the surprise of his life.

There, sitting on his bed like it was the most natural thing in the world was Erza. And what's more, she was wearing...a bunny outfit?! Jellal raised an eyebrow, taking in the expanse of white fur covering her… It was more a mascot outfit than anything and the ears were ridiculously big and floppy. "Erza?" he called out uncertainly, "W…what are you doing here?" – in that silly outfit, her wanted to add but thought it best to leave that out…for now.

"Nothing." she muttered, staring at him, with one knee over the other. How she even managed to move in that thing was a wonder.

"And...W..What's with that outfit?"

"Why're you freaking stuttering, Jellal?" she questioned him through half-lidded eyes. "Yah scared of bunny girls, huh?"

And then he knew, Erza Scarlet was drunk. He sighed as he walked over to her, "You want me to walk you over to the guild quarters?" he asked, managing to pull at one of her makeshift…paws and slinging it over his shoulder,

"Mahn, you're such an effin' stick in the mud," she laughed out in mockery, pulling her hand free of his grip and almost stumbling to the ground in the process. She caught herself in time, swaying to her feet, "You'd think a guy'd jump at a defenseless girl sitting on their bed in an effin' bunny-girl outfit. You sure you're even a man down there?" she spat bitterly.

Jellal sighed yet again, rubbing at his temples. He wasn't sure where to even start. Maybe he should just knock her out and carry her back…though with her strength it wouldn't be easy even if she were tipsy as hell. He thought carefully how to respond and decided to settle with addressing each of her 'concerns', "First off, I do have the 'man parts'. You know that as well as I."

She looked at him like a wide-eyed child and it would seem that her foggy brain recalled how she'd stumbled into the guys at the bath while still at the tower of heaven. She hurriedly looked away, her cheeks a faint pink.

He cursed under his breath. Probably shouldn't have mentioned that.

"Second, you're not really defenseless… You'd punch anyone who wrongs you to the moon and that's 'if' you haven't killed them first."

Erza shrugged, not really bothering to respond to that one. Though exaggerated, it was true to some extent.

"Third, I wouldn't exactly call a furry mascot a bunny girl."

That caught her attention. She tilted her head to one side innocently. It was then that she raised her hand up for inspection. Her mouth formed an 'Oh' as she took in the furry paw in its place. And then she broke out into a fit of giggles, like a silly school girl.

All the while, he regarded her. Though his words were curt and short, his onyx orbs not once left her face. They marveled her luscious pink lips as she laughed, his expression softening in what can only be called adoration.

Her eyes met his and her lips formed a smirk, "Oops, wrong outfit."

"Huh?"

Before he could voice anything more the hut was filled with a blinding light and the next thing he knew there she was in a skimpy playboy bunny outfit. The glistening fabric clung to her curvy frame, barely covering her generous mounds and a little perky tail bobbed right between her butt cheeks.

He swallowed a lump in his throat uncomfortably, "You need to get back to the guild," he said, keeping his voice as level as possible while his eyes drank in everything set before him.

Her voice took on a low and very sultry tone, "Now, where would the fun in that be?"

"E…Erza?"

With an annoyed tsk she yanked him towards her before shoving him onto the before snaking her arms around his shoulders. She lingered for a few seconds, letting him marinate in shock. She had an impossibly seductive smile on her face as she moved herself onto his lap, effectively straddling him. "I said, where would the fun be if I left now?" she repeated in a sing-song voice. Jellal froze as she used a finger to trace a line from his forehead down his nose. "Aw...come on now, don't act shy.

In truth, Jellal was more petrified than anything. It had taken him all the self-control he possessed to push her away at that beach… But now…he had to do it again…push her away- the one person whom he wanted more than anything to bury deep within his arms- once more without hurting her pride or feelings or…

His thoughts were brought to an abrupt halt as the Titania moved closer to him, claiming his lips authoritatively. She moaned just at the sensation of their brushing lips, her body melting into his.

He hurriedly shuffled backwards, pushing her away by the shoulders once more. He wiped the thin sheen of saliva off of his lips, looking anywhere but at Erza, "M…My fiancée, remember?!" he blurted out, suddenly aware of how pathetic he sounded. God, Meredy was right, that was lame.

Erza hissed, visibly irked at the mere mention of that, "Well that non-existent witch can freaking suck it," she spat out in a slurred tone, taking a hold of Jellal's hands and tearing them away from her shoulders.

His eyebrows furrowed as he noted that her strength was fully intact. Her fingers laced with his as she pressed a tender kiss to his exposed and just that was enough to make his reason spiral out of control.

She pressed his palm to her cheek, eyes closed, reveling in his touch, "Tonight, Jellal Fernandes," she whispered, "This is the only way you're allowed to touch me."

He wanted to embrace her, kiss her and take her and never let her go… He knew that this princess wasn't one that needed saving but if at some point he ended up breaking her –again- there was no way he could forgive himself let alone seek atonement.

And so he pulled himself free of her grip and proceeded to move her off of him despite his own protests and the grinding of her lips.

Smoldering chocolate met his gaze and before he knew it a punch flew at his jaw. He could have blocked it if he so wished but he accepted it. Only he was surprised when no impact came.

Her fist had stopped, a mere centimeter from his face and her shoulder were visibly trembling and it broke his heart as a tear slid its way down her cheek.

"Why?" she shrieked, her fists dropping to her sides, "Why d'you so want to suffer? Huh? I get all your atonement and crap but this is stupid."

"It's not stupid…It's – "

"It wasn't even you, dammit. It was that crazy time lady and her mind control! And now here you are frolicking about with her, spouting nonsense about your worthlessness to find happiness in anything," her words were still slurred and her eyebrows were knitted together, struggling to form coherent sentences in her drunken haze.

He was very much aware of what she was getting at but Jellal couldn't help but snort at the 'frolicking with the crazy time lady' comment.

Bad move.

The very next second he was slammed to the wall, her arm at his throat, "It's funny to yah, eh?" she screamed, "You push me away and insist on your 'punishment' for kicks, huh?! Is that it?"

"Erza…"

"You enjoy it, do yah? The thought of punishment?!" She loomed over him, her arm crushing painfully into his windpipe, effectively cutting off his air supply, "You're a HUGE M, are yah, Jelly?"

'J.E.L.L.Y?!' was all Jellal's mind repeated over and over before black crept into his vision

-.

The bed was soft yet uncomfortable… No… It wasn't really the bed that was uncomfortable…It was the way his arms seemed to be stretched over his head. Wait…What?

His eyes felt groggy and he opened them slowly, flinching at the light that mercilessly pierced in… And he almost wished he hadn't. He wished he could roll over on his side and go back to sleep and escape whatever twisted dream this was. Only he couldn't, his hands were bound to the bedpost with a strange orange thing. His legs were the same, only they were sprawled open. It took him a while to recognize the orange thing as Milliana's binds…. Her magic suppressing binds…

He cursed under his breath, his mouth constricted by a large ball-gag placed so deftly between his lips.

Shit.

And there at the foot of the bed was Erza, the look on her face one he'd never seen before. She was no longer swaying on her feet, in fact she stood there, strong and proud in boots with heels so high he marveled she could stand at all. Her 'bunny outfit' was switched wih another tight fitting one, black, shining, leather and around her neck, wrists and forearms were black cuffs studded with metal… and on the bedside table were an array of 'items' all in black… Everything screamed bondage.

Holy shit.

"You want punishment?" she asked, her voice back to its sultry tone as she dug one heeled foot into the mattress of the bed, just beside Jellal's lower body, "If it's 'punishment' that you want, I'll oh so gladly give it to you!~"

HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

A/N: I hope that was at least mildly interesting. And I get that Erza's character is all over the place with this one. Sorry, couldn't help it. Blame all the alcohol she drank for all the inconsistency! (Easy way out, lol) .

Feedback, suggestions and even diabolical plans as to what happens next welcome and much appreciated ^^