Jude slammed the text book closed and slid it across the desk, knocking his miniature star wars figurines off the edge and into the trashbin placed next to it. He reached over and pulled the trashcan towards him, picking out all of the small plastic characters and placing them haphazardly along his desk. With a yawn, he pulled himself out of his chair with struggle after not moving from in in hours. If Jude had had to spend one more second on that project he would have given up on it all together.
Smiling slightly to himself, he reached for his phone that had somehow gotten lost under the sheets of his bed. He typed a quick message to Connor, then placed back down as he waited for a response. Moments later, he heard the familiar 'Ding!', alerting him that Connor had responded. 'I'll be over once game is over. Sys'. It was a simple text, but it got Jude's heart beating faster, like it did every time he was talking to Connor. They hadn't officially been together for more than a few months, and were still a secret to most, but that didn't matter to Jude.
Getting to his feet, Jude surveyed to room around him. With Jesus off at boarding school, Jude's clutter had over taken the room. Though he still had a very small amount of things he could call his own, his clothes were littered across the room, with only one or two anywhere near his hamper. All of Jesus' stuff had gone with him to boarding school, but his bed still lay in the corner, collecting dust. His Moms, Callie, and Mariana had gone shopping for Mariana's date the next day. Callie hadn't wanted to go, but Mariana had threatened to drag her by her hair if she refused. So Callie had gone, reluctantly. And Brandon was at Idyllwild, working on the piece he was composing with Kat.
So Jude had the house to himself for the next few hours, or until Connor came over to play video games. In the meantime, Jude was forced to entertain himself. He strided over to the girl's room and swung open the door, cringing slightly as theknob hit the wall behind it, and stepped inside. He was immedately overwhelmed by the smell of Mariana's perfume, and made a face before regaining his senses. He scanned his surrounding, trying to remember where Mariana kept the cards and board games. The closet, maybe?
Jude opened the door to the closet slowly, not wanting a large pile of clothes to crush him. But the girl's closet was surprisingly neat. Jude's eyes searched through the clothes and pastel belts, trying to find the games. His eyes landed on one of Mariana's dresses. It was a light blue, with lace from the chest up and wrapping over the shoulders. A small belt hung loosely around the middle. Jude's heart began to race as he remembered what had happened last time he had done this. Memories of dull pain, his own cries echoing around him being drowned out by the sound of his foster father's insults, calling him names that he had heard to many times for someone of his age.
Jude began the shake his head violently, trying to rid his mind of the memory. He was safe now. He was living with a family that accepted him for who he was no matter what. With one more quick glance around the room to make sure no one was there, Jude tentatively grabbed the silky fabric of the dress and pulled it from its hanger, letting it fall into his hands. With a deep breath, he switched from his own boring T-shirt and cargo schorts and into the flowing blue dress. Once he had pulled it on and positioned it so it was comfortable, he closed the door to the closet so he could look at himself in the mirror placed on the outside of the door.
Jude's grin grew as his reflection came into view. The dress fit well on him, despite his difference in body shape from his sister. It came down to his knees, as It did on Mariana, and he did a quick twirl in it, positioning himself so he could watch his reflection at all times. Jude was not a self absorbed person, but It had been so long since he'd been able to wear a dress.
Suddenly, the door opened slowly, with a small creak, and Connor's familiar face peeked through, his grin streching from ear to ear. "We won our ga-" he began, but stopped dead when he saw Jude's expression. Jude's face was full of pure terror, his arms up in a defensive pose and his eyes only slightly open. Connor opened the door wider and stepped through, making his way towards his boyfriend. As Connor got closer, Jude's body became even more tensed, and he let out a small whimper. He even choked out the words "Please" and "Don't" before returning to silence.
Connor couldn't take it anymore. He ran over to Jude and pulled his hands out of the air in front of his face and into his own, but Jude yanked them away quickly, his face covered in tears. Connor was both confused and terrified. He had no idea what was going on. He had come over to see Jude, and when he hadn't seen him in his room, he had gone looking for him. He had found him in his sisters' room, wearing Mariana's dress. It had shocked him at first, but he had to admit it looked kind of... cute. Until it was paired with tears and defensive fists.
After about 30 seconds of Connor just staring at him with a concerned look, Jude's fists lowered slightly and his gaze focused back up on Connor. He managed to choke out two words:
"I-I'm sorry." He said before breaking down into sobs. Connor pulled him into a hug, still confused about what was going on, but more concerned than anything else. After 5 minutes, Jude seemed to have run out of tears and turned his head to face Connor's. Connor simply stared at him expectantly. "Why are you sorry?" He said, his voice cracking at the end, preparing for the worst.
Jude was confused now as well. Did Connor not even see what he was wearing? "Because I'm... I'm wearing a dress!" Jude choked out. "I thought boys aren't supposed to do that! Last time I wore a dress..." Jude continued, but he couldn't finish. He glanced back up at his boyfirend, and his best friend. Connor was silent as he grabbed Jude's hand, willing him to finish.
And Jude did. He told Connor about the night that he was beaten for wearing what he wanted to, how it had caused him to be seperated from his older sister, about all the things his foster father had called him. By the end of it, Connor was choked up and Jude was staring out the ground, having cried himself out minutes before. Connor pulled Jude into a hug and began to speak.
"You don't have to be afraid anymore, Jude. You're safe now."
THE END
