Hi all- this is my first fan fiction, so be kind.
Disclaimers- I own nothing. This is a piece of Real Person Fiction. I am not writing real events.
Naya Rivera and Shay Mitchell meet up for a chemistry read for Shay's guest role on Glee. Chemistry spills over into a beautiful night together.
I waited a few days after Shay's tweet- over thinking what to say in reply. I knew that the fan sites and lesbian blogs were waiting with baited breath for something flirty and witty, but so far, nothing came to me. I wasn't sure if this silence was a result of that nervous way Shay makes me feel or all the fear I have about this storyline, this message. I had never played a gay character before and it was more emotional than I had anticipated. Each time I picked up my iphone to tweet, I was overwhelmed by the messages from kids all over the country in response to that scene and felt a frightening paralysis.
When Ashley came back from her trip to London for the promo tour it was one of the first things she brought up.
"So, what do you think?" I could tell from the way she asked that to her there was no question. "Naya, do you think we should push for it with Ryan or with Marlene."
I wasn't sure how to tell her that I wasn't sure that it was all that great an idea. I pretended to be distracted while examining the sushi between us, hoping that that would signal that I was disinterested.
I mocked ignorance, "Ask Ryan what?"
"Come on B, the crossover with Shay?" She said, annoyed with me. "Jenna and Shay talked about it at dance class and decided it would be better to take to Marlene" and grabbed the last piece of inari. "She thinks that she will like it better because she a 'gay lady'." She said while giggling.
I guess that everyone had an opinion; I was sure that Kevin, Jenna, Amber and Douglas would bring it up soon. Heather would pretend she had no opinion but her opinion was the one I was concerned with the most. There appears to be no ignoring this anymore.
"How would it even work, Ash? Has anyone even thought this through?"
Of course, we had met before but a chemistry read is so different from casually hanging out. We hung out at the golden globes; we have friends in common. Shay was trying so hard to make me feel comfortable because although she is new to acting, she is used to these sorts of reads. She glanced my way, appearing to ignore the messages her manager was adamantly delivering to her across the room and smiled at me. I dropped her gaze, and looked over towards Brad who nodded.
After our instructions and after the room has quieted, Shay cleared her throat and finger combed her hair. Sitting this close on a couch in my trailer with an audience, trying to look deep into each other eyes made me want to run. She smelled spicy and rich. Chemistry reads are more about the energy between two people then the lines, which was good because the lines had flown right out of my mind as she shuck out her tendrils, took a deep breath and focused right at my face.
"Hi," she said in a breath.
We were sitting face to face and Shay leaned in close and whispered, "you look amazing." And even closer to whisper, barely even noticeably, "I have been thinking about your lips." It surprised me, the laughter that erupted from inside was a shock. I could not contain my giggles as the nervousness completely took over.
Her polite, sweet smile reminded me of our audience and I quickly scanned the room. The stone faces of Ryan, Ian and Brad made me fear that this was not going well. I had kissed Heather a million times, had kissed my friends Cory and Mark and Chord but this felt different.
I looked at my hands, used my thumb to play with the soft skin at the bottom of my middle finger and looked up at Shay with a shrug. She gave me a little grin and bit her bottom lip and looked up at our audience. "Can Naya and I have a few minutes by ourselves?"
I held my breath. This was not that kind of set, not the kind of place where you are not ready when the panel is assembled. I looked over my shoulder at Ryan with a nervous look on my face. I was sure that Ryan thought all of this was a waste of time anyway. But instead of the huff I expected, he gave me a little grin and they all left the room quietly.
I fell against the back of the couch and let out a long sigh. "I am not sure this is going to work."
"Did what I said feel cheesy to you?" Shay said with a smirk. "It was just the first thing that came to mind. You do look especially nice today and your upper lip has this incredible curve."
My hand flew up to my face. Why does this woman make my face flush and my body erupt in giggles?
"Not cheesy, at all" I answered to my feet. Next to mine were Shays long legs dressed casually in black leggings and tall laced up boots. I kicked off my platform heels and tucked my feet under me. "I don't know what's wrong with me, Shay. I am not usually such a freak."
"What would make you more comfortable? Would it help if I did something else?" Her earnestness was so sweet I couldn't make her think for one more moment that this was her fault.
"No, lady" I said softly, "this is all about me, you are doing everything right."
"Well what would you do with Heather to get ready for a scene like this?" And without knowing it Shay had arrived at the source of my stress. I put my head in my hands and blew all the air out of my lungs.
Heather hadn't even mentioned this read, even though I had all but asked if she would be mad if I did this. She clearly knew it was happening and left after lunch for some appointment. When Heather gets quiet and distant, like she doesn't have a care in the world, danger is just around the bend. It wasn't like we were intimately involved or anything but she was my best friend and sometimes we struggled when others threatened to come between us.
"Oh god, that's the whole problem. We would eat tacos and watch stupid youtube videos and take a nap together on the couch before we wake up late and run to the set laughing." And this memory makes me do just that, laugh, laugh about how easy it is with her, laugh because there was no pressure when you're kissing your best friend. Then I look over at the kind patient actress beside me and grow quiet again. "I don't think I can do it with anybody else." And I finished that sentence in my head- 'especially someone like you.'
Shay looked serious for a moment, and a line spread up from her brow across her forehead to her hairline, like she was thinking of the perfect solution. Then grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet. "I've got it! Let's dance." And the most sincere look swam across her face.
I felt frozen but I straightened my shirt nervously and pushed my hair behind my shoulder as Shay went to my MacBook and selected a song. She looked up from behind the computer with a devious look took off her maroon blazer and threw it onto the couch. A fast electric beat fills the trailer and the words- 'she's shakin it for daddy and she's shaking it for me' vibrate the walls. I can't believe she picked this song. I yell in her direction "I am loving Nicki Minaj right now and Robin Thicke is the sexiest." The dancing felt like a celebration and I could feel the confidence that is all over Nicki, everywhere. Our dancing is replaced by strutting around and rapping on top of her lyrics and Shay looks hotter than ever.
"I thought you would be different," she says in the pause between songs "not that I thought you would be bitchy because I knew you were sweet but I thought you would more crazy and carefree." Then slowly my trailer was filled with a different kind of music, this time it is soft guitar music and the high falsetto of 'lost without u.' I didn't know what to say, I wasn't sure how to explain my timid demeanor.
To be honest, she was different than I had imagined as well, more sultry and dark. More serious. Her lids were heavy. There was none of the cute banter and easy laughter I remember from our earlier encounters. She was almost completely silent.
I whispered, "you scare me" in her direction. She stepped right up to me, gentle touched by cheek and paused just close enough, millimeters away from my full lips, to let me kissed her so softly. My breath got caught and hitched as I gasped and a tremor shook my shoulders. I felt my knees lock. I wasn't so surprised about the kiss, just surprised that one so gentle and slow could feel so powerful. I leaned my forehead against hers and looked up into her eyes. My arms went to her shoulders and backed her up against the wall next to my inspiration board.
My fingertips traced the line of her collarbone and then reach up to grab the back of her neck. That kiss was deeper and hungrier, all tongue and gasping. Her lips were so supple and I could not help myself. Her tongue licked at mine. Her hand graced on my stomach and travelled up to cup my breast. I reached around her and grabbed her ass, pulling her leg up and around me. I grabbed her neck to pull her mouth, the tongue I was now desperate for even closer. My hand tangled in the hair at the nape of her neck. A desperation was welling up inside me. My core throbbed and contracted.
She broke our embrace and looked me square in the eye. She grabbed my hand, slowly walked over to the couch and sat down, pulling me down on top of her. I wanted to look into her eyes again so I reached down and brushed her beautiful dark hair out face. When I went in for more, Shay stopped me and said, "I am so hot for you right now, let's call them in here so we can get this read done and over with," and her eyes and her voice got smokier, "and then get the hell out of here so I can play with you."
A little embarrassed but so excited, this promise was almost more then I could take. Heat was rushing and chasing itself from my face to my fingers as I tried to use my phone to text Ryan to tell him we were ready. After pressing send, I pushed myself off the couch and went to the small fridge, slowly and deliberately drank half a bottle of water while looking at the wall. A small knock bounced on the trailer door. I tried to answer, "Come in," but my voice got stuck on the way out. "Mhmm" was all I could muster after clearing my throat.
It was Heather.
She climbed the stairs as she had a hundred times before, like she was coming to borrow the sweatshirt she is always borrowing. I looked from Heather to Shay and back again. "Hey I just wanted to tell you I believe in you and I think you're great." The grin on her face made me know that she meant it. Then from behind her, I could hear Ryan and Brad bickering about something. "I got to go, hey Shay take care of our girl, okay?" and she bounded down the stairs before either of us could say more. I realized that my fear was about losing the closeness that we had on set, the flirty safety of secret glances and our special pinky handshakes. Taking this leap without her was scary; forging ahead professionally without her was terrifying.
As Ryan and the others got settled, Shay reached up and grabbed my hand.
I waited in the front seat of her car, while she ran in to pick up the takeout food we ordered. I was on a high, having felt a little lightheaded from the activities of the last hour. Watching her long legs strut towards the door, gracefully avoiding the attention of the men gathered there, I pulled out my phone to text Kevin. I text Kevin at times like these. Times when need to feel the familiarity of an inside joke.
My whole body was vibrating, so I must have missed the text from Ryan. The red star flashed on the screen, taunting me to open it. I cleared my thought and sat up a little higher in the seat and pressed the icon on the screen.
Ryan's message read, simply- "I knew it was a perfect match before you even started. Good job."
Unexpectedly a tear welled up in the corner of my eye. And then I was startled by the swift opening of the car's rear driver's side door. After placing the thai food bag on the back seat, she slid in behind the wheel and looked over at me. A look of concern spread across her face and she reached up to wipe the tear that had run down my cheek to my jaw line. I grabbed her hand and placed a gentle little kiss on her wrist, letting the bold scent of her perfume fill me. I handed her my phone so she could see our success, my relief, our validation right there on the screen.
We drove to my apartment in silence except for the occasional, "yep turn right up here." When she pulled into the lot and shut off the car, we just sat there for a moment in the dark. Her charged breath and the noise of music from a distant party were the only sounds.
I opened the door and quickly walked around to open hers. We walked silently, hand in hand to my door. The smell of thai food trailed behind us. The mirror at the end of the hallway, revealed the beautiful sight we were together. Dark and long and graceful. When we arrived at my door, she turned to lean against the wall beside it, patiently, while I struggled with the keys.
Once inside, I flicked on the lights and walked to the kitchen to get dishes for our meal. Shay was quiet and I fought the urge to talk nervously or search her face for answers. It felt robotic as I opened drawers and cabinets. I opened a bottle of red wine from my trip with Kevin to Napa. As I reached up to the highest cabinet to grab wine glasses, I felt all of her weight pressed against me from behind.
Her hands were already around me rubbing at my breasts through my shirt and pulling my hips into hers as she kissed the spot right under my ear. Her breathing was quick and jagged. The wine glasses teetered dangerously as I tried to carefully set them on the counter. She spun me around so quickly, and pushed me up onto the counter so that she was pressed up against my heat. The full contact there was almost more than I could take. A whine escaped from deep inside me from the painful pleasure of it. Her arm, around the small of my back, set a rhythm for me and we moved together, kissing desperately.
I whispered, "Baby," and her name "Shay," on my breath in between kisses.
She picked me up and carried me to the chair in my living room, the one that is big enough to sleep in, big enough for two. And we curled up there kissing. The speed slowed so the exploring was careful and we looked into each other's eyes for these long gazes that made me tremble inside. But she was in control, this play between us was making me want to follow her where ever she led. Follow her, chase her, search and grab for what I wanted. The way that she was forcing us to pay attention to each second was stirring something new inside. Something focused clarified from the desperation for relief that had dominated the last few hours.
Her power, her voiceless direction was magical. And then her voice came out clearly, "I want to see you."
And I rose slowly, a little coy and with our eyes locked, I began to undress before her. I knew just what to do. My new bangs shadowed my eyes, now dark and mischievous. I freed one button at a time, letting my shirt fall open. Pleased with her response, I showed her the black and white lace bra hiding there. The shirt dropped to a pile at my feet. I spun around to look at her over my shoulder. Carefully I remove my skirt, bending over to show her my ass as it falls to the floor. The cute black and white boyshorts I wear on days I want to feel strong are left. I hooked my thumb in the panties waistband, to show her my left hip. Shay fingers her hair from over her left ear to her right, like she does when she is getting serious. A playful grin spreads across her face and her pursed lips.
"Hmm," she lets out, pleased with herself. "You wanna know what I want?" she asks. I have never wanted anything more. I bit my lip and nodded. With a giggle, she says, "I want to see you touch yourself, want to know what you like."
"You've been thinking about what I look like when I cum? Wanna see how I masturbated while I thinking of you last night?"
"You touched yourself for me last night?" she snarled.
I answered by walking over to my ipod, flicking right to the song I wanted and placing it in the dock. Sade's buttery voice slowly filled the room like molasses.
Climbing onto the chair opposite of her, I showed her I was ready. I threw my hair over my shoulder and showed her my neck. I reached up to pull my bra down to show her my harden nipples, pulling the right one pinched between my fingers and my palm. My hands travelled down my flat stomach and I hooked my thumbs into my panties and slid them up to my ankles, which I raised above me to tease her. I could tell that the sight of my ass excited her even more. She grabbed the arm of the chair.
I whipped around to my knees with my butt in the air to show her more. I looked around my shoulder to see her reaction. She shifted in her chair and rubbed her hands up and down her thighs in her black, skintight leggings. I slipped my fingers in and out of my mouth slowly, making sure she could see my tongue. I reached around my back and spread my cheeks for her so that she could see my pink. I showed her how wet she made me, showed her the wetness glistening on my thighs.
