A/N: I tried finishing my Wheel of Time story but I think I need to start with something easier to get myself going again. This story is an AU from The Legend of Korra, Episode 12 onwards. And when I say episode 12, I mean about 18 minutes in. Half the story follow the original plot and then I change it. This is hopefully the prologue and I'll have the motivation to finish the story - probably following a similar storyline to that of Book 2 - Spirits, just with variations. It's my own theory that if Bryke knew they were getting more than one season that Korra wouldn't have gotten her bending back, so thus a new story was born.
I don't own anything, the rights of Korra go to the wonderful Bryke team. Please review with constructive criticism so I can improve.
Korra sat numbly as Katara explained the truth to her. The horrible, unbelievable truth. She could not reconnect her to the other elements. Korra sat, half listening, unable to truly comprehend the facts. But she could feel it – like half of her soul was missing. Or, to be more precise, three-quarters was missing. She heard Katara get up and move into the other room where her family was waiting – she was glad that she didn't have to explain it. How could she face them? She could barely face the facts herself – she didn't want to acknowledge the truth. That she was a failure. If she was no longer the Avatar – who was she? Korra didn't want to follow that train of thought so she did what she always did – she acted. She made herself stand and walk out of the room. Everyone looked at her with concern – and pity. She had to get away.
"It's going to be alright", Tenzin said. Korra had always secretly admired his calm, his ability to make everything seem possible, like teaching her airbending, but this was so much worse. "No", she made herself say, "it's not". She pushed passed Mako and Bolin on her way to the door and grabbed her jacket. She felt Mako reach for her, but the urge to get away surged and she continued walking. She needed to get away from everyone and if she did it quickly she could keep what was left of her pride and not run.
Mako followed after her, "Korra, wait." Why couldn't he just leave her alone? "Go away", she snapped. He replied, patient and loving, "I will, I just want you to know that I'm her for you." Korra felt her remaining strength waver, he wasn't allowed to be calm or caring, she was a failure. She deserved nothing. She wasn't the Avatar but her old instincts remained – to lash out.
"No, I mean go away, back to Republic city. Get on with your life." Mako didn't understand, "What are you talking about?". It hurt, but she forced the words out, "I'm not the Avatar anymore, you don't need to do me any favours". After that delivery, she turned away, her strength was running low and she needed to get away before she broke. But he never gave up easily – it was probably one of his best features.
His hand was warm and comforting on her shoulder, "I don't care if you're the Avatar or not." Lies, lies. They must be lies. The Avatar was who she was – she was nothing without her powers. No one. But she turned to face him anyway. He continued, "Look, when Tarrlock took you I was losing my mind with the thought of never seeing you again. I realised – I love you, Korra."
His hand was gentle on her face and a couple of weeks ago, everything she wanted. But the world had been turned upside down. Her hand moved to cover his, "I", she stammered, what did not-Avatar Korra want? Her control wavered and almost broke. She had to get away. "I can't". She ran to Naga, Mako calling after her. In the saddle, she was in control again. She was able to sync with Naga and get lost in the motions and as she raced across the frozen tundra, her thoughts could not haunt her.
Naga ran to the edge of the ice, the ocean stretching for miles connecting even to Republic City – where she had experienced and lost more than she had ever thought possible. Once she had hopped off Naga, the questions resurfaced. If she wasn't the Avatar – who was she? Can an Avatar control only one element? How could she do her duty? Or had her duty changed? Was her new duty to let go and let a new Avatar be born? Staring over the ocean, only one thing was certain to Korra. She wanted to live. Tears welled up in her eyes and when the first one fell – right off the cliff, maybe just like her – she let go of her control and sobbed into her knees. For a blessed moment, she was one with her grief – able to experience it without the shame of others seeing her. But the moment was short as her heard footsteps in the snow behind her. She saw a glimpse of an airbender uniform and looked away – what could her mentor think of her? He would be disappointed that his father had been reborn into such a failure.
"Not now, Tenzin", she managed to choke out, "I just want to be left alone". An unfamiliar voice replied to her, "But you called me here." Korra turned around in panic but she recognised the face, she smiled, and for the moment she was content, Aang could bring her answers. As this all passed through her head, all she could say was, "Aang". "You have finally connected with your spiritual self", Aang said. Korra stood – confused, how was that possible?
"But how?", she asked. Aang's answer was swift, "When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change." After he spoke, the space behind him was filled with a great variety of people, people she had never met but instinctively knew. Aang continued, "I cannot return your bending to you, Korra, this is something you must do yourself".
The doubts returned, "But how?", Korra repeated, "I don't know anything, I'm the worst Avatar ever. I'm a failure – I almost failed the city, I only happened to use my airbending. I let so many people get hurt and so many more lost their bending. They are probably suffering much more than I am because I still have my airbending". Korra knew she was blabbing but she also didn't know how to stop. "Aang, I don't know what to do. I considered just letting a new Avatar be born – how can I move on from that?"
Aang smiled, and in that moment, she almost felt like anything was possible, "Korra, we have all made mistakes, we are you and you are us but we are also different. What unites us is that we are all flawed, sometimes we fail, but we always try again. I don't know how to reconnect you to the elements, if I could, I would help you. But the elements are a part of you as much as we are, they are not gone, just lost. You can connect to them again as you connected to your past lives. You just need to believe." What that, he stepped back, and the Avatars vanished, like they were never even there. But for the first time since Amon had touched her, Korra felt hope. She felt her strength returning, like she could face another dawn. She would have to take it one day at a time for awhile, but she had a goal, she had hope and she had the other Avatars.
Korra smiled and turned to face Mako – who looked like he had run right after her. "Mako", she said quietly, "I can't... I don't feel as though I can respond to you right now. I need to find out who I am again – maybe find out who I was in the first place – otherwise it's not fair. I'm sorry." Mako looked down, avoiding her eyes, "I understand", he whispered before looking up, "But you said 'right now', so that doesn't mean not ever, right?" Korra smiled, remembering why she liked him so much, "Come on, City Boy, it's cold out here and you've never experienced the South Pole". As they rode back on Naga, Korra felt fragile but determined and she focussed on the thought that if she overcome this, nothing would be beyond her.
Back at the compound, Korra explained her encounter to Aang and her belief that she could reconnect to the elements if she gained more spiritual ability. "Master Tenzin," she asked with a bow, "I would like to request that you continue being my airbending master and help me on my journey to master my spiritual side." Tenzin smiled, his calming smile that reminded her so of Aang and he placed his hand on her shoulder, "I am so proud of you, Avatar Korra." Avatar. She didn't feel like she deserved the title yet, but she wanted to do everything in her power to help people, to reconnect to the other elements and fulfil her duties as Avatar. She turned to Lin, "I will do everything in my power to reconnect to my own elements so I can help you reconnect to yours." Lin smiled wanly and Korra felt her determination surge again, she may not feel like an Avatar but people depended on her regardless. She would not fail them again.
