Yamaguchi shrugged on his jersey jacket and slipped out past the hallway and out of his house. Lately he'd been taking walks like this, trying to clear his head. He wore joggers beneath that clung to his toned, long legs. His hands were in his pockets, hood over his head as he walked with no particular destination in mind. His homework was finished. He'd studied the new plays the Karasuno volleyball team had imagined together. Maybe before he would've considered heading over to Tsukishima's at this point... but now... Yamaguchi felt himself smiling at the thought.

He was happy for them. Really, he was!

The dark haired teen started walking more quickly, until he came to a jog. He debated going over to Ukai's for a steamed bun, and thought against it. He was regretting not stopping for a drink, however, when the cold burned his lungs, and he finally stopped for air. He held his hands on his hips, staggering back into a park bench, and immediately regretted that too. The bench was icy cold, and already burning his tush. He thought of getting up, but muttered aloud to himself, "My fate is sealed."

"Tadashi?"

He looked up from his reverie, his hood falling behind him and out of his face as he saw Tsukishima's older brother advancing toward him, looking confused.

"Ah! Akiteru-kun. Hey," Yamaguchi chirped, his expression lightening a little as the blond stepped up to him, close enough that his knees knocked into Yamaguchi's. Akiteru took a step back, laughing. "Sorry- -my contacts aren't in. They were driving me crazy, so I took 'em out. What're you doing here?" That was a leading question. How was Yamaguchi supposed to answer that? "Isn't Kei at your place?"

Yamaguchi straightened himself, now also confused. "Err, no. Did he say he was?"

Maybe as an older brother, Akiteru should've been mad that he'd been lied to. "What a little shit. I knew he was fibbing. Scooch over so I can sit." Tsukishima fibbed? What reason would he have to lie? Oh. Yamaguchi looked out in front of him at the park they inhabited, one that wasn't far from Tsukishima's house. Akiteru was snickering a little, easing down the grocery bags he'd been carrying. "Brrr! This thing is freezing." Akiteru wiggled on the bench, a man taller than him, and a little wider with muscle, but seemingly more childish than the teen sitting next to him. Yamaguchi smiled; Akiteru always knew how to make him smile. "I didn't know you wore contacts. Why not just go with glasses if they bug you?"

"My face is too round for glasses." Akiteru dropped the bags into one hand, feeling around his face with a small frown. "Can't pull 'em off like Kei."

"No way!" Yamaguchi blurted, tilting his head to the side to imagine them on Akiteru's face. "You'd definitely be able to pull them off."

Akiteru's face inched back a little, and the skin on Yamaguchi's face that wasn't peppered with spots quickly reddened. He looked away, and Akiteru leaned after him, nudging his shoulder. "Thanks, buddy... I, uhh, haven't seen you in a long time. What's up with that?" Akiteru got right to the point, as per usual. Yamaguchi looked away guiltily, thinking back on the latest times he'd denied Tsukishima's offers to hang out. Akiteru watched him, a wearing a knowing smile. "Kinda hard to hang out with the guy that took your girl, huh?"

Yamaguchi's head whipped over too hastily, and he was quickly defending the younger Tsukishima boy. "No, he- -he didn't take her or anything like that. She wasn't really..." He looked down, rolling a pebble underneath his sneaker. "... Mine. But still, I'm totally happy for them."

Akiteru gave Yamaguchi a funny look and he reiterated, "No, really. I'm okay with it." Was he still reassuring Akiteru, or was he just reassuring himself, now? He became more quiet, hands in his lap. His throat was dry and itchy, making his voice crack a little. Aki was searching through one of the bags, bringing out some flavored water and wordlessly offering it to Yamaguchi, who gratefully accepted it. He quenched his thirst, in moderation, handing it back and watching Akiteru take a swig from the same bottle his lips had touched. Only he would be weird enough to be self conscious about that. He shrugged his shoulders, meaning to answer Akiteru's earlier question. "I wanted to be a good friend and give 'em space, you know? I know they want to be alone sometimes, so I've been... trying to let them have that." Even though the situation left him somewhat friend-less and object-of-desire-less, he'd wanted to do that for them.

"God you are too pure for this world, Tadashi," sighed Akiteru, giving Yamaguchi that look he gave that always seemed to bore into his soul. "You're such a good kid." He pat down Tadashi's hair, letting his hand rest there.

"A good kid? Nah, that's not me." Yamaguchi confessed slowly, his elbows resting on his knees as he looked up into his friend's brother's amused expression. "I'm not." He grasped his hands together, feeling Akiteru's hand pause in his hair. Yamaguchi tried to fight a smile, and a shiver, when Akiteru's hand released Yamaguchi's hair and instead plopped on the back of the bench behind Yamaguchi's shoulders. "Oh really? What'd you do, donate to the wrong charity? Plant too many trees?" Akiteru's grin could split anyone's heart if they were lucky enough to receive it, and Yamaguchi was no different, laughing softly. "No, no! I'm serious. I'm... not a nice guy."

The taller blond wasn't at all convinced, but he shrugged his shoulders. "Go shoot. How're you not the nicest guy in the whole anime?"

"Well, I..." he looked down between his feet, gingerly taking the water bottle back from Akiteru's hand so he could hold it in his own. "Sometimes, I think about... wanting to go back to how it was before. Before Tsukki andYachi got together." His voice grew quiet, and he found he couldn't look Akiteru in the eye anymore. "I say I'm happy for them and I mean it, but... I really..." Yamaguchi felt Akiteru's hand on his shoulder, and realized his vision was growing blurry. He lifted the back of his hand up to his eyes, rubbing his forearm slowly across them.

"I really didn't want to give her up."

I said it. Something about it liberated Yamaguchi into more tears. Akiteru was holding his shoulder now, protectively.

"I didn't want to give her up, not to Tsukki or anyone. But I- -I love Tsukki so much, you know? I'd never wanna- -nghn- -take his happiness away, y'know?"

"I know," Akiteru admonished softly, his hand gently warming Yamaguchi's arm. The younger male sank into the heat, just a little, and his throaty gasps interrupted his thoughts as he really came to terms with it.

"And I miss my friend. I miss it just being the two of us. And there are other times I wonder if, oh God, sometimes I think if Tsukki wasn't there, ma-maybe I'd have a chance with her. I hate thinking it, but I..."

He needed the nonjudgmental warmth Akiteru provided. He needed to voice these thoughts, but there wasn't any way he could do it to Tsukishima or Yachi.

"I-If he knew I... felt this way... no, he can't ever know. If he did, he'd- -"

Akiteru smiled and Yamaguchi heard it in his voice, feeling the squeeze along his shoulder. "I know. You're both good kids, and neither of you want to see the other in pain. Tadashi, you..." Akiteru struggled in silence a little bit, thinking of how he could comfort his little brother's best friend. "You're not as bad as you think you are. Really."

Yamaguchi thought he was the worst friend on Earth and he started to cry more. Akiteru flailed a little bit, not sure how he'd managed to make things worse. "Tadashi, really, it's completely normal to think like that." His hand rested on Yamaguchi's lower back, watching the younger's face lift up a little to peek. "If you weren't the least bit jealous, I'd think you were crazy." Akiteru laughed a little, trying to reassure Yamaguchi, who thought about what Akiteru said.

"Changes don't always have to be good. It's okay to miss your friend. And it's okay that you're upset about not ending up with Yachi. I know it doesn't feel that way right now, but..." with a sigh, he reached up and dried a few tears from Yamaguchi's cheeks with his gloved thumbs. "There's nothing wrong with being honest like that. Not with me."

This too freed something inside of Yamaguchi, who felt his shoulders figuratively lift once free of burden. "I mean I... don't want to be with Yachi now, but... it did piss me off a little when I found out about them." Yamaguchi nodded sweetly, pulling Akiteru's hand over his face to dry himself some more. Akiteru wasn't complaining as his hand was used, only giving his little smirk. "Yeah. You definitely owe Kei a slug or something."

"Are you seriously encouraging me to punch Tsukki? Jeez, what kind of older brother are you, Akiteru-kun?" Yamaguchi smiled a little bit despite himself, then laughed quietly. Akiteru was more than eager to see Yamaguchi smiling again.

"See? Doesn't feel so bad once you're honest with it, right?" Akiteru gave Yamaguchi a hearty pat on the back. "It'll take time, but you'll be able to move on and find a girl of your own. Well, another girl."

Yamaguchi huffed rather pessimistically into his bangs, rolling his eyes. "Yeah, I'm not expecting anything anytime soon. Getting shot down doesn't exactly make me confident."

Yamaguchi really wished he hadn't said anything.

"What on Earth are you talking about? You've got the looks. You're tall. Girls love guys on sports teams."

"What looks? All I've got are bug eyes. And zits." Yamaguchi thought about pointing out every flaw he found in himself, but he just decided to emphasize all of him with big arms. Akiteru wasn't having it.

"Pfft. There's nothing wrong with your eyes. And no one cares about zits; see, look, I've got this guy on my chin right here." Akiteru pointed toward an insignificantly small red spot on his chin, which Yamaguchi had to squint his eyes to find. He huffed, "That's not even a..."

"Nuh-uh, look, I've got one on my neck too." Akiteru had Yamaguchi laughing until his sides hurt, and then some. He was too silly to become frustrated with.

Akiteru sighed happily, watching his brother's friend- -no, his friend- -laugh so breathlessly. "So, you're on a really cold park bench when you can walk over a few blocks to our house and warm up. What do you say?"

Yamaguchi wiped his eyes again as he beamed at him. "Then your mom'll find out Tsukki lied about being with me. I don't wanna get him in trouble..."

"Don't punish yourself for Kei's stupid lie. If you want to come over, then come over. Whether or not Kei's there, I mean."

It wasn't some hollow, fleeting invitation. It held the depth and brotherly affection that Akiteru was abundant in. Yamaguchi felt warm on that cold bench, feeling it start from his chest and spread outward.

"Maybe I will, then."