Intro

I sat quietly at an empty table in Music Room 3, doing some homework, waiting for my brother to finish up with his stupid club. It had to be the most boring thing on my schedule everyday. I think what they do is just flat out stupid, too. These dim-minded chicks pay to be entertained by one or two handsome man whores. My brother's pretty much in it for the profits, all the others were bribed by Tono.

Tamaki was one of my closer friends, and I know he can do practically anything he sets his mind to. He went through a lot of hard work to get the host club together. He got a 17 year-old boy who had just gotten out of stuffed animal rehab, to join his club where he promised him stuffed animals and sweets galore. I swear the guy's gonna get diabetes someday. His cousin Mori is very loyal to the little half pint so he joined the club along with him. My brother was Tamaki's very first friend when he moved here to Japan, so it was easy to get him to help with the club. But then Tamaki did something extremely astounding. He persuaded the Hitachiin brothers to join.

I know right?! It's amazing. The twins were the most closed off, secluded people I'd ever seen. And they would play the worst games with these poor girls who tried to get close to them. It's really quite sad how cruel they were. And I use the term 'were' very lightly. They're still evil, mischievous little turds but they don't hurt people as much as they used to. Often they'll put on some very pimpin' hats and play the 'Which One Is Hikaru-kun?!' game. I've seen them play it so much--not to mention we're in the same class-- I can tell them apart very well. I would try to befriend them, but they never let anyone in their little world. But I guess this is where my story really starts.

"Can I come over after school?" I read the message that appeared on my cell phone.

I replied, "Sure, Sydd, but you know we have to wait for Kyouya in the music room."

My phone vibrated again. "Yeah, I don't care. I just don't want to go home." it read.

"Okay. Meet me there after 7th hour." Send.

The final bell of the day rang through the halls of Ouran Academy. I rummaged through my locker, filling my bag, then slammed it shut. Students chattered making plans for the weekend as I walked through the halls.

As I opened the door of the third music room, the scent of Axe and sakura blossoms found their way to my nose. A vision of yellow and blue school uniforms blended with red roses scattered around the room. I made my way to my usual place at the same empty table and slouched back in my chair. Sydd should appear anytime now.

When she arrived, Sydd sat across from me. My brothers laptop was in the way of our view so I pushed it aside.

"Could I copy your Algebra homework from yesterday?" Sydd asked me and a nervous sweat drop ran down her face.

"I guess so," I said and pulled out a piece of college ruled paper with numbers and different signs all over it. When I slid it across the table, someone adjusted the laptop to their view. It was Hikaru Hitachiin.

He nelt down so he could type comfortably. Sydd and I stared silently as he keyed in some figures and scroled down the page. When he straightened his spine he gave us a questioning look.

"What?" He asked calmly. "Is there something wrong with my face?" His uke voice rand in my hear.

I shooke my head no.

"Then what?" He asked again.

Sydd shrugged in unison with me. Then Kaoru came up behind him, wrapping his arms around his brothers waist and rested his head on his shoulder.

"Hikaru.~ Don't just wonder off like that leaving me all alone!~" Kaoru sang in Hikaru's ear.

Hikaru smirked, "I'm sorry, Kaoru. I was just checking our customers for the rest of the day. It seems we're finished though.~" Hikaru coo'd back to him.

I watched hoping they would leave. Then kaoru noticed my poor expression.

"Why the sour face, Sarah-chan?" he asked, releasing his twin to lean on the table in front of me. Sydd and Hikaru watched patiently.

"Kaoru, I just don't appreciate your guys' twincest act." I said as the corners of my mouth tilted downward and my eye's narrowed.

A shocked look fell across both Sydd's and Kaoru's face. Most girls can't get enough twincest, but I can't stand it. Sydd had to be the biggest yaoi fangirl in the whole Academy, so she really enjoyed watching them.

Kaoru stood abreast to his brother and they stared at me blankly. Then the blankness was replaced with a wicked grin of shiny white teeth. They ruffled their hair and mixed each other up trying to confuse me and Sydd.

"Let's play the 'Which One Is Hikaru-kun?!' game!~" The twins said with a catchy toon.

I let out a small sigh and pointed to the red-head on the left. "Your Hikaru," then to the right, "and your Kaoru."

"Uh oh! You got it wrong!~" they sang and smiled as though the felt a sense of accomplishment.

I looked at them and smiled. "I'm not stupid." I said. "I've been in class with you two for years. I'm also more observant than others. And I know I was right."

"Let's go, Sarah!" Kyouya called to me as he headed to the door.

I gathered my things and hung my bag over my shoulder. "C'mon, Sydd."

I could feel their eye's burning into my head as we left the room.

I sat silently in front of my computer waiting patiently for Keyboarding to begin. I'd almost forgotten Kaoru sat beside me in this class when he came in and sat down next to me. He didn't say anything, so neither did I.

When the bell rang to let out class broke the awkward quietness, I gathered my things and went out to the bus that we had to take back to the main building. I sat in my usual spot, above the back wheel on the left side. Everyday I'd put my ear buds in and listen to my music attempting to drain out the loud bus ruckus.

"What'chya listening to?" Kaoru asked me as he sat down next to me.

I looked over at him. "Oh uh.. It's You Found Me by The Fray.

"I've never heard it." He said.

"Really?" I took out one of the head phones and handed it to him. "Here listen. It's really good.

He shoved the little speaker into his ear. We sat listening as the bus moved forward. The song was about half way over when we pulled up to the main high school building. He took the speaker back out and didn't say anything. I looked at him funny. His eye's looked a little glossy. Maybe the lyrics bothered him, because it looked like if he were to talk tears would run down his cheeks. I didn't say anything afraid I might upset him.

We got off the bus and he ran off in the opposite direction I was headed in. I saw him run up to Hikaru and start to blubber. I looked away before I could think about what was going on any longer. I wanted to talk to Sydd about it. Thankfully the twins weren't in our next class so I'd have a good chance to talk to her.

"Hey Sydd, guess what happened on the votec bus." I sat down next to her and she leaned over he desk so we could talk a little more private.

"What?" She asked sounding pretty enthused.

"Well, Kaoru sat next to me and he'd asked what I was listening to on my mp3, so I told him. And it was You Found Me, and he'd said he'd never heard it before so I told him he needed to listen to it. He did and when he got off the bus he looked like he was about to cry! I was just like Dude wtf just happened? Then he went off to Hikaru and started mumbleing and I couldn't understand him and now I'm here!" I took a deep breath.

Sydd pondered to herself for a moment then spoke her mind. "Well think about the lyrics of the song... And about the twins lifestyle.. It kinda fit's what you've done. You entered their lives. Sarah, you found Kaoru. Lost and Insecure!~" She sang the last part of her explanation.

I gazed off at the floor thinking about what she'd just said to her. "...What do I do about it though?" I asked for her advise.

"Well if you ask me I think you should try and get close to him. Maybe you guys'll fall in love!~" She teased me smiling very slyly.

"Whatever! We're so not gonna fall in love." I rolled my eyes.

She shook her head at me. "Face it, Sarah! Your the only one who can even tell them apart! It seems to me like you'd be the only one who would ever get anything relevantly close to them. Try it. Maybe you'll start to like him." Syd shrugged and turned to face the front of the room just as the bell rang for class to begin.

I turned, too, and said, "Maybe..."

Everyday that week I'd let Kaoru listen to my mp3 player, everyday a new song. Then Friday I think I played the most important song. I'll explain why.

That whole week I'd been doing my best to get closer to him, he'd be okay with it for a while then the gate would slam shut again. So I thought this last song would strike a small part of his heart fairly hard...

I waited for him on the bus and as usual handed him on headphone...

The saddest thing is you could be anything, that you could want.

We could've been everything, but now we're not.

Now it's not anything at all.

The hardest part was getting this close to you

and giving up this dream I built with you.

A fairy tale that isn't coming true.

You've got some growing up to do.

I wish we could have worked it out.

I wish I didn't have these doubts,

I wish I didn't have to wonder just what you are doing now.

I wish I didn't know inside

That it won't work out for you and I.

I wish that I could stop this wishing and just say my last goodbye.

After all the things you put me through,

tell me why I'm still in love with you.

And why am I, why am I still waiting for your call?

You broke my heart, I'm taking it back from you.

And taking back the life I gave--

The bus came to a stop and Kaoru's eyes became glossy like they had the first day. I turned off my mp3 and stared at him. "Kaoru?" I tried to get his attention. He didn't look at me. It was obvious he was about to cry and he was thinking hard.

We got off the bus and as usual he found Hikaru and went off in the opposite direction as me. I thought I should let him absorb what he'd heard in the song. At the time I didn't think about what I was letting him listen to. I didn't mean to make him upset with the words in that stupid song. The rest of that day I felt horrible.

When I got to my car I checked the messages on my cell. I opened the one from Sydd. "What happened with kaoru? He's like major blank today." I replied.

"Well I think it might have been the song we listened to on the bus today." Send.

The phone vibrated. "What song?"

"It was Wishes by Superchick." Send.

She didn't reply so just went home. Hopefully Kaoru would think about that song over the weekend... I wanted him to see what I'd said through just making him listen to one song...I honestly think in just that week...I'd fallen in love with Kaoru Hitachiin...

~#~#~#~#~#~#~#~#~#~

As Monday came around I went to school a little sulky. The weather had been very dark and wet. I hate the rain. Especially when it rains for days and days.

I sat in my normal spot in the lunch room waiting for breakfast to be served. The whole weekend I couldn't get Kaoru off my mind. "Please don't make this hurt..." I thought to myself. Kaoru probably didn't feel the same as I did. He probably just wanted someone to find him. Someone else to become his friend, not his lover... I was dreaming way to big.

As I finished my breakfast I went to dump my tray, and my phone vibrated.

"Kaoru's here in first hour and he seems kinda cheery. ;]" I read from Sydd.

I didn't comprehend what she'd told me. He wasn't touched by Friday and he had something much more exciting on his mind. He didn't care about me...

"That's great..." I sent back to my friend then headed to first hour.

The bell rang just as I entered the room and everyone but a few people were in their seats. I saw Kaoru was one of the few standing. We made eye contact.

When I realized I was staring my eye's flickered away and I could feel my face getting hot. I sat down and hid my face with my hair. Sydd poked me from across the isle; I glanced at her.

"Why's your face so red, Sarah-chan?" She asked and smiled a devilish smile.

I put my head down so my face was buried in my arms. Then there was a strong scent of vanilla on the other side of my desk. A scent that only reminded me of Kaoru... I didn't dare look up, because I knew he'd sat down in the desk next to mine.

The teacher gathered our attention and class began. It was absolutely impossible for me to concentrate with him sitting next to me. His intoxicating smell of vanilla polluted my mind making me feel slightly light headed.

"Can I be excused to the nurse, I feel dizzy." I asked, not thinking and interrupting the teacher.

"I guess so." She said, "Would you like someone to accompany you?" She asked.

"Uh... Sure." My face was even more red. Please don't say hi--

"Kaoru why don't you take her." She simply stated. Ahhh crap..

"Yes ma'am." Kaoru stood up then helped me up.

I watched him as we left the room. The whole walk to the infirmary was so intense and uncomfortable, on my part anyways. I swayed a little bit.

Kaoru supported me. "Are you okay? ... Do you need me to carry you?" He asked.

Oh my god.. He just asked to carry me. I shook my head. "N-no I'll be fine..." We continued on and went into the nurses office. She was tending to another student at the time so we sat down in the chairs up against the wall.

I slumped over so my hair fell around my face, just so he couldn't look at me. Then he just brushed the black strands away and looked me in the eyes. His eye's are so beautiful, all golden and such a dark outline around the Eris.. And his pupils. So dark and unhappy looking...

"Are you sure your alright? Do you wonna lay down or something?" He asked caringly.

"Well, there's no beds in here." I said looking about the room.

"If you really don't feel that well you can lay out on these chairs and rest your head on my lap." He recommended.

"Holy crap! I'm gonna die in here!" I thought to myself. "Uh... Well... I-- No I can't!" I said and blushed a horrible shade of red.

He watched me and didn't push me any farther than that. "Oh, okay I'm sorry..."

We sat silently and waited for the nurse.

"Okay what's the problem, Sarah?" The nurse asked me in a caring tone.

"I-I was just getting really light headed and dizzy." I told her. She pressed the back of her hand to my forehead.

"Let me take your temperature then..." She pulled out a little thermometer that she ran across my forehead. It beeped and she looked at it. " 99.3" She said. "Okay well I don't think you'll need to go home. You can take a Tylenol and stay in here until your fever lowers. Come lay on this bed back here." She took me off behind a curtain then went back out to tell Kaoru that he could go back to class. The he asked her, "Couldn't I stay with her. I need to know that she's okay." It shocked me a little. He NEEDED... to know I was okay...

The nurse must have agreed because she moved the curtin asside and Kaoru came in to sit beside the little bed I was on.

"Y-you don't have to stay with me, I'll be fine..." I stuttered.

"No. I'm staying." Kaoru said firmly, his voice full of authority.

"...Okay...." I said then lied my head down on the fluffy pillow. Before I knew it I'd fallen asleep. It was 9 o'clock when I woke up.

My eye's flickered open and saw Kaoru was still at my side. "Uh... Kaoru..." I whispered.

"Hm? Yes, Sarah?" He asked me.

"Oh I just... I didn't think you'd stay so long.." I felt disoriented. I didn't know how much of this conversation I'd understand.

"I'm gonna stay in here until your better..." He said.

My eye's started to cross and I tried to refocus them. "Mmm. You smell like vanilla.."

He smiled at me. "It's my natural scent I think." He brushed my hair away from my face. His touch almost felt electric. I blushed again.

I sat up and swayed a little bit, then stood up. "L-let's go back to class..." I started toward the door. He followed me out.

"We should be in keyboarding right now. We have to walk to the votec building." He said and we started heading up the hill beside the football field.

When we got to the building he opened the door for me and came in after me.

"I honestly don't want to deal with typing today." He said as we entered the room. We sat down and key'd in stupid pointless words until the bell rang again. Then we sat on the bus...and listened to music together as usual. This time the same song was still playing that we had listened to Friday. We seemed to have a very long bus ride. We stopped and he took the speaker out of his ear.

"I need to talk to you after school okay?" He said as we departed.

"...Okay..." I said and walked off to my next class.

The rest of that day I could not concentrate worth crap. Then when the final bell rand, I sprang up out of my seat and ran to my locker, hoping he'd be waiting for me. But he wasn't. So I goatherd my things and went out to my car, thinking maybe he'd be there. But he wasn't... Then I looked inside my car. There was a single rose and an envelope. I opened the car door a little to roughly, and grabbed the envelope. It read:

"Sarah, I'm sorry I couldn't meet you, Hikaru forced me to go straight home after school. So I'll tell you this way.

You were the first to tell us twins apart, and that honestly means the world to me. I've thought and thought day and night about what I'm feeling now...and I've finally decide. You've gotten so close to me, and I refuse to let this opportunity pass me by. Sarah I don't want to lose you...I love you.

Kaoru." And there was a tiny heart beside his name. I stared at the letter and had to read it three times just to believe it was real. His delicious scent of vanilla floated to my nose. My hands slowly moved up so hold the letter to my chest. "I love you, too." I whispered to my empty car.

~#~#~#~#~#~#~#~#~

The next day I went to school feeling like I was the happiest person alive. I made my way to first hour and saw Kaoru sitting in the back, alone. The empty seat next to him beckoned to me. So I sat down and smiled at Kaoru. He smiled back. Then at the same time we said together. "I love you."

We spent the rest of our Junior year and that summer together. It was the best year of my life. But Then something came up. Something very serious.

"I have cancer..." Kaorus voice rang into my ear.

"I....well can't.... Is there a cure?!" I asked becoming frantic.

"... No. It's a very rare type of cancer. They haven't developed a cure yet..." Disappointment in his voice was easy to hear as I held the phone tight to my ear.

"...Kaoru..." My vision began to blur as tears filled my eyes. "Oh Kaoru!" I broke down and fell to my knees, crying into the receiver.

He let me calm down then tried to comfort me. "Sarah, It'll be okay..."

"No it won't be!! Your only 17! How the hell can you have cancer!?!" I yelled through the phone.

"Shhh. Shhh, Sarah it's fine. We just have to use our time wisely..." He was beginning to frustrate me.

"WHY ARE YOU SO CALM?! Y-You can't have cancer, it's impossible." I chocked on my tears. "I-I'm coming to you!" I said and hung up the phone.

~#~#~#~~#~

I ran up the steps leading to the twins house, and banged my fist on the door. A maid answered it.

"How may I help y--" I shoved past her and ran through the house, making my way to their room.

I threw the door open and more tears fell down my cheek. My eye's focused on my precious Kaoru sitting up in his bed with his shirt off. He was so pale. "Kaoru.." I whispered. Slowly, I made my way over to him, then collapsed at his feet.

He looked down at me, "Hi, love."

I pulled myself up into his bed and looked him in the eye. I ran my fingers around his face, down his neck and over his chest. "Kaoru..."

He pulled me into his arms. "Sarah, don't worry about me. I'm going to be okay..." He said and gently rubbed my back.

"You can't die, Kaoru!" I cried into his shoulder.

He Shhhs'd me some more and rocked side to side. "We can't let this ruin our lives. We'll make it through..."

I shook my head. " No if you die I won't be able to live! You-Your the best thing that's ever happened to me! I won't let this happen!"

"Sarah please be reasonable!" He caused me to snap out of my little fit. I stared him in the eyes.

"Let's not worry about tomorrow, and live our lives today." He took me back in his arms and we sat like that for what seemed like an eternity.

~#~#~#~#~#~#~

Kaoru looked more worse day after day. I couldn't stand watching him in this condition. Just looking him in the eye was difficult, because they were filled with pain. You couldn't see any love or even life in them anymore....just pain.

About a month had passed, and he'd gotten so bad that he couldn't even go to school. I came by ever day after I was done with my classes. We would walk in their garden, but that wouldn't last long... He soon didn't have the strength to even get out of bed. I decided I would become hidebound so I could spend more time with him.

Everyday, Kaoru sleeps about 17 hours. He's such a week fragile thing... I wonna just cling to him, but I knew it would cause him even more pain.

Then one day came around and he had enough strength to stay awake and we talked. A lot had happened when he was asleep. I told him how Sydd and Hikaru were planning on getting married, and how much everyone missed him at the club. Then I asked him. "Kaoru, what's the one thing I can do for you before you...before you pass on?.."

"I want to listen to that song... the one we listened to on the bus that one day." He answered very sheepishly.

His choice had shocked me. "Oh... well..." I turned so i could rummage through my purse, and pulled out my mp3. I turned it on and handed him one head phone. His thin arm moved slowly to put the speaker in his ear.

I played the song.

After all the things you put me through,

tell me why I'm still in love with you.

And why am I, why am I still waiting for your call?

You broke my heart, I'm taking it back from you.

And taking back the life I gave to you.

Life goes on before and after you.

I've got some growing up to do.

I wish we could have worked it out.

I wish I didn't have these doubts,

I wish I didn't have to wonder just what you are doing now.

I wish I didn't know inside

That it won't work out for you and I.

I wish that I could stop this wishing and just say my last goodbye.

It's time I say my last goodbye.

Goodbye, Goodbye, It's time I say my last goodbye.

I wish we could have worked it out.

I wish I didn't have these doubts,

I wish I didn't have to wonder just what you are doing now.

I wish I didn't know inside

That it won't work out for you and I.

I wish that I could stop this wishing and

just say my last goodbye

its time i said my last goodbye.

Goodbye, Goodbye, It's time I say my last goodbye.

its time i said my last goodbye.

Goodbye, Goodbye, It's time I say my last goodbye.

Kaoru had closed his eyes as we listened, and a few tears rolled down his cheek. As the song came to an end, he opened his eyes and looked into mine, both shining in the dim light of his room.

"I love you....so much..." He whispered to me.

"I love you, too..." I cried back to him.

"But, I think it's time... I say my last goodbye..."He whispered and his eyelids slowly fell and he took his final breath.

I took the speakers from our ears and put the music player down. Then cried into Kaorus sheets.

[END]